Disability in the Mer-world

[Rebela Hunter]

Wow, reading all of these stories and things is amazing ;o;
Such a wonderful community !

[TheSaltySiren]

I agree with everyone in saying not to pretend to have a disability. My goal is to actually find other Mers who do have disabilities, and work with them.

Also about the wheelchair..I don;t think there is anything else that works well to move us around on dry land when in full silicone tail. I am eventually going to make the wheelchair into a huge rock like seat using paper mache, etc..that way the chair won't show at all and it will look way cooler to be sitting on a huge rock with seaweed, etc.

And you don;t have to be deaf to use sign language, I think it would be a great tool to have to use, and you can reach out to the deaf community and tell them your idea and you are not deaf, but know sign language. Great way to include deaf kids

And on a side note: It is never cool to try and be another race besides your own..Never goes well and always comes out racist. There are tons of mers in the world from every race, religion etc..so why do we need to pretend? Let's just be inclusive of everyone..after all we are all part of the HUMAN race

[theMerFanc]

Thank you Elle for sharing your story.

on the wheelchair discussion, I don't see how that could be offensive. Since mermaids aren't saying they are paralyzed or the like when they aren't. Wheelchairs are use by people who are in able to walk on their own and that applies to mermaids as well. It wouldn't be any different the. Ah man using a floatations device while swimming. Not Evonne has a wrangler to carry them from place to place.

[LouLouBelle]

As I said, I know nobody would want to upset anyone, but please believe me when I say it really could.

I'm going to try my best to explain why it could come across as offensive. This is probably going to be quite long, so apologies in advance!

For people who cannot walk at all, they use their chair for necessity. It could be hurtful to them to see someone using a chair as part of a fantasy costume. By putting on that mermaid tail, you're CHOOSING to not be able to walk. And you're doing it because you want to. Ie, for fun. And then you're using a piece of medical equipment as part of the dressing up game.

For someone who actually relies on that piece of medical equipment and probably hates it, that could look insulting. Whether you want it to or not. They'll be used to people ignoring them and overlooking them because they're in that chair. They'll be used to people talking to the able bodied person who's with them as if they're either not there or not competent enough to hold a conversation.

It's sad, but it happens. People in chairs are discriminated against all too frequently. I work with plenty of adults and kids who are severely disabled and rely on chairs and other pieces of equipment, so I've seen it all too often. It's honestly heartbreaking when someone thanks you for speaking to them throughout their appointment instead of their carer.

They'll also be used to facing real struggles trying to get around because they can't move without that chair. Public transport becomes a nightmare. Crossing the road can be nigh impossible if there isn't a pedestrian crossing - curbs and the speed of cars can cause real problems. Going to the bathroom in a public place can be difficult depending on facilities.

At the end of the day, wheelchairs are pieces of medical equipment specifically designed for people with disabilities, and these people will view them VERY differently to you or me. Seeing someone use one for fun... Could be insulting to someone who actually has no choice.

Yes, chairs can be extremely useful for someone in a mermaid tail, but that doesn't mean you're not going to upset people who actually need them and maybe hate them at the same time.

I've no doubts there will be disabled people who wouldn't mind at all, but there will be those who do.

I'd be much happier myself with a make shift cart rather than a specifically designed piece of medical equipment. I could never feel comfortable using a wheelchair like that when I know I don't actually need it.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[LouLouBelle]

Reading through the threads my heart jumped a little when I saw a girl showing off her tails from a wheel chair, at first I thought "oh, someone else with problems walking" then I realised she was just using it because of course her legs were together and I know a lot of people use them for moving around on land but personally I don't like seeing it.

I've seen so much creativity and ingenuity on this site like lou lou belle said some sort of cart to move around on land could be great- side note for one new years eve party I had a friend who went out as pirate with a few others they converted a shopping trolley into a pirate ship full of booze! point being is there are possibilities that don't involve wheelchairs.

.

This.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Elle Dee]

thank you lou lou belle that's what I was exactly what I was trying to say.

[merwandering]

I agree- I just can't see a context where you'd have to depend on a wheelchair. If it is mermaiding for fun, why not put on your tail at the edge of or in the water? If it is professional, it just doesn't look magical anyway. I wouldn't use a wheelchair and it bothers me to see them used. It very much highlights the priveledge gap between disability and ability when- exactly what Lou said- you use something to facilitate a recreational activity with a piece of equipment that someone would give anything not to have to use. I have a family member who lost his ability to walk in the prime of his life, with four young children, a business he owned but that was very physical, it was such a production just to get out of the house and go somewhere. He slowly lost use of his hands- it became unsafe just for him to go around the block alone. He lost his independence, his ability to provide for his family, he eventually even needed to be fed- his mind was sharp as a tack, but that almost made it harder to lose his abilities. That chair represented so much loss, and I'm not sure how he would feel seeing someone repurpose it for a fun activity, but for me, I see it and it just feels like flaunting the priveledge of being able to decide to use the chair- and later take off the tail and no longer need it

[merwandering]

Flaunting is the wrong word- highlighting?

[merwandering]

I don't ever post here, mainly due to my disability. I have been lurking the forum for a while now. I'm on every day usually, never to comment. I have Schizophrenia. My mersona is from lake Erie, where many mers once lived. Then the humans polluted it so bad most of us died out. I was one of the survivors, but unfortunately, the toxicity of the city gave me a disability. Constantly paranoid of humans wanting to hurt me, hearing things they don't, seeing things they don't. Living in a world humans don't understand. My mersona helps me cope, actually. If someone is lucky enough to come across me swimming, it's even that much more magicalfor me and for them. For me, being able to see a human be nice to me. For them, seeing a mermaid.

i am so happy to see a mermaid with schizophrenia
and. I am excited to see you incorporate that into your story. I so much think that more openness makes a world of difference in terms of shifting social perspectives
thank you for sharing your story and your self!

[theMerFanc]

So I'm curious on your opinion. I am also a cosplayer and for awhile I have really wanted to Cosplay the Oracle from DC. She is one of the few DC characters I have ever had any interest in whatso ever. But as a non-chairbound person, is it offensive to cosplay a paralyzed character? Or probably a better known example would be professor X or Daredevil. Cosplaying a character with a disability without having said disability yourself.

[LouLouBelle]

So I'm curious on your opinion. I am also a cosplayer and for awhile I have really wanted to Cosplay the Oracle from DC. She is one of the few DC characters I have ever had any interest in whatso ever. But as a non-chairbound person, is it offensive to cosplay a paralyzed character? Or probably a better known example would be professor X or Daredevil. Cosplaying a character with a disability without having said disability yourself.

That's something a lot of people wouldn't think about, but yes, I think it definitely could be. At least, for people who need a chair and see it as a necessary evil. Again, you're using a piece of medical equipment that they rely on in a game of dress-up. You're pretending to have a disability for fun.

Not every disabled person will feel that way, but some will.

In those cases, it would be much more appropriate to leave those roles to people who actually are disabled. That can go a long way in helping to include them in the cosplay community, and actually make them feel like they have a place there.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[TheSaltySiren]

So here is my two cents on the cosplay thing.

I used to help run Anime North, I did it for six years and in that time I saw plenty of non disabled people cosplaying characters that were. Professor X was huge one year due to the X-men movies. No one ever had an issue, as they knew it was part of the cosplay. And said cosplayers never pretended they were actually paralyzed at all. That being said, this was all at a huge anime convention where attendee's generally know what to expect. Also there were a couple of cosplayers who were disabled and in chairs that cosplayed non paralyzed characters, etc. One of my staff was also chair bound and never took offence, and he even let me know he preferred to cosplay non disabled characters.

Like I said, I will be converting the wheelchair I have into a huge moving rock thing, so the chair won't be visible.

[Princess Kae-Leah]

I'm disabled, which is part of the reason why I'm one of the very few mers who cannot swim. When I first joined this community years ago, I felt extremely insecure and out of place here because of my inability, and due to that have always been pretty much on the forefront of advocating for a more inclusive mer-community. It's because of me that the wording of the mermaiding article on Wikipedia was re-edited to include mers who don't actually swim in their tails. There is a part of me that wishes I can magically swim like Hannah Fraser, but part of me likes that by being one of the very few non-swimmers on here I can help expand the horizons of swimming mers by promoting alternative activities to due in their tail and by encouraging others to have a more inclusive outlook. I try very hard to keep old insecurities from bubbling to the surface and dragging me under, but once in a while I feel sad when I see mer-events that require swimming ability, although I very much appreciate those companies like Raina's that offer packages that don't require swimming experience such as her totally awesome-sauce mermaid makeover photo packages. I started a thread in fact about the mers who inspire me as a "mermaid who only swims through the waters of imagination and meditation".

[Princess Kae-Leah]

I now have a mersona as a disabled mermaid:
Princess Kae-Leah is the lovely mermaid princess of the North Pacific Ocean with a sparkly purple tail in the same universe as Disney’s The Little Mermaid who just happens to have born disabled, unable to swim. Due to this, she generally leads a sheltered life, doted upon by her mother, Queen Gwendolyn, rarely leaving the palace of her kingdom and when she does, it’s in a seahorse-drawn chariot, the mer-world’s equivalent of a wheelchair. Although she is insecure about her disability, she tries very hard to compensate for it by studying very hard, especially languages and environmental science, hoping to one day rule her kingdom with her brain making up for her lack of swimming ability.
When Kae-Leah and her mother visited Atlantica on a royal state visit, she quickly becomes good friends with Ariel, who of course is very accepting of her disability, especially when she discovers that Princess Kae-Leah enjoys visiting the surface of the ocean as much as she does, because when posed on rocks above the water, all mermaids’ mobility is limited, no matter how good of a swimmer they are under the water, so it’s an equalizer! Ursula the Sea Witch attempted to take advantage of Kae-Leah’s insecurity by promising to grant her the ability to swim in exchange for stealing King Triton’s trident for her, but she declined, because as much as she’d love to swim, she refused to place the sea kingdom in danger.
Princess Kae-Leah hopes one day to find a merman who would love her in spite of her disability, but for the time being is grateful for the love and support of her family and friends.

[Takahao]

It completely slipped my mind to start posting earlier, but I've been caught up the past month with school work and stress, and general procrastination. I'm somewhat of an introvert, and just lose motivation to do anything and interact with anyone sometimes, and just want to sleep. Now to the post:

I suffer from Autism Spectrum Disorder (previously known as Aspergers), and am severely socially deficient. Honestly sometimes I feel like a complete outcast, as people judge and treat me unfairly based on my disability. I'm a decent person, and extremely kind and empathetic, but my ability to interact with others is completely shot.

I have to memorize patterns and social norms and standards, to function somewhat normally (me and my friends like to jest ourselves as daywalkers, because we're somewhat functional despite our shared disability).

But barely beneath the surface, once you have conversation with me, I lose almost all social functionality and drop my spaghetti. It's like my brain is a game of Fallout and out all my points in intelligence, leaving nothing for speechcraft. The only upside would probably be my severe ability to focus and learn information, which ultimately is due to the above cost. And it sucks. I also have crazy impulse control issues, to where I'll have to do something, regardless of consequences.

It's mostly minor stuff, I've never had a urge to harm or injure myself, at least one that I didn't think was normal and couldn't control myself to not act upon. I don't have a mersona yet, goodness knows how many fursonas, Bioniclesonas, and whatever I have to keep track of.

I'd like to have a mermaid tail, preferably a silicone one sculpted like a dragon's, but to do that I need money, a pool, and to know how to swim with a tail. As far as the physically disabled mers, push people to follow their interest, and support their love for this community and shared interest.

Treat them the same as everybody else, and where their physical disability may hold them back, give your friend the extra inch they need to reach success, be it swimming with a tail, overcoming their disability, or drawing met-art. Let them be the representation, and help them to become examples.

As for the the people who use wheelchairs when they're in their tails, for convenience of movement, don't. Waddle over their, or have a friend help you. Being in a wheel chair, or using crutches sucks. I hurt myself doing parkour about 4 months ago (once again, impulsivity issues), and tore all the ligaments in my left knee. Because of the nature of the injury, (knee bent wrong way, rotated around when I fell and landed on it) it distributed the trauma across everything, luckily, instead of snapping my ACL or something.

But it hurt so bad to use crutches, I had to use a wheelchair, which just hurt my hands instead of my shoulders, back, and knees. I remember crying, and screaming and roaring, trying to build the strength and bloodlust that I needed to move. My walk home was agonizing, and turned from a 5 minute walk to a 30 minute walk, if my mom's friend was unable to drive me from the stop to my home. I wouldn't wish that on anybody, and I have complete respect and humility for those unfortunate to be permanently disabled.

Just please don't trivialize disabilities, and how they affect us. Don't think you have to set an example to help other people. Push, and guide them to become the examples themselves, for their own accomplishments.

[PearlieMae]

Hello there! I know this post isn't new, and I also didn't read all of the post, but I see the ones that I did read, that some people were against using wheelchairs as a mermaid since it's a medical equipment. Though I understand that, how would anyone really know the difference? I would be classified as disabled, and use a wheelchair part time. I have MS. And of course degenerative disc disease, and other issues because of it. But I still love swimming, while I still can. So I have a wheelchair, but don't always use it, in the event of a good day. Back to my question though, I use it as medical equipment, but I'd like to use it as a mermaid too. How would anyone ese know whether or not I'm disabled, and whether or not they have the right to judge me as a mermaid using it? Just curious, because I wouldn't want to offend anyone either, but I do really also use a wheelchair.

Since you are a medical equipment wheelchair user, are you offended that I am using a wheelchair as a mermaid?

My feeling is: Screw what other people think. I have a wheelchair to get around when I am in my mermaid tail. Someone gets all butthurt about it, well, that's their problem.

[Mermaid Fenicia]

I'm a wheelchair user as well, but most of the time I use it only when I'm a visitor at an event as I can't walk for very long time. But most people are used to see me as a dealer at some of the conventions that I attend and think that I'm to lazy to walk when they see me at other events using my wheelchair.

[Newbie_Mermaid]

Yea, ive had that feeling too, or at a store I go to often. Some days I can walk the store holding onto a cart, others I can't even walk from the door of my car to my trunk.people that see me often look at me like I'm lazy or just faking it. At first it hurt alot, but as I've gotten to talk to people and explain (thoigh I shouldn't have to) I've become more comfortable with myself. And it really is for my health and safety, so in that perspective I don't care what others think of me. :-)

[Princess Aegean]

My lovely bf uses a wheelchair due to an injury he had before we met. He's a pretty open guy, and I asked him about this. He said it wouldn't offend him, given the situation. If someone was using the chair as a necessity, like if there really wasn't a better way to get around (like if you had to get from point a to point b during a busy gig and it was too far to be carried and taking off your tail would ruin the appearance or something) he'd be more than cool with that and would probably make some sort of joke about him being a mermaid too. However, if someone was flaunting it or being inappropriate towards it in some way (which I doubt anyone here would), then he'd have an issue. To him it's just something that makes him able to live his life as normally as possible, and if someone else used one briefly due to necessity, he wouldn't find an issue. Now, he certainly isn't all wheelchair users and he's admittedly kinda nutty, but I figured I'd share his opinion on here. And Princess Kae-Leah, he now wants his own seahorse drawn chariot, so thank you for that.

[Newbie_Mermaid]

Haha awesome. I want something cool too! And I appreciate knowing I'm not alone in that thought cycle too. :-)