8 Years an Addict: The Price of Psychiatric Medications

[Seatan]

So after being on the mood stabilizer Seroquel (generic is quetiapine) for over 8 years, I am trying to scale back on it and see if my bipolar II is better now that my brain is fully developed. Even in my late teens when I first showed signs of the illness I never had a full blown manic episode or exhibited more than a couple of the symptoms that define mania, though I had full out, hardcore depression, for which I take Wellbutrin. I am really hoping this goes well, because Seroquel is a bitch. If I sleep less than ten hours a night I can hardly function the next morning because it hits up your histamines (imagine taking a huge dose of Benadryl). Unfortunately this also involves some seriously tough side effects even when weaning slowly down, because once your body adjusts to taking Seroquel it does not want to stop. Think inability to sleep, nausea, cold sweats, and restless legs, among others. I am recording the mg I take every day and what moods I experienced that day. After about a week taking half dosage my moods remain steady. If I do not take my antidepressant, I am depressed in a few days' time. I no longer go to the pdoc who originally diagnosed me (back when it was called manic depression and there were no "levels") and, like I told my new pdoc, the reason I want to cut back the Seroquel is to see if the diagnosis is good. It was made at a time when I was young, away from my parents and town for the first time ever, and horribly depressed. I did not have typical mania (absolutely no euphoria or delusions, in fact what she labelled my mania was actually quite unpleasant and involved obsessively thinking about my problems). My mother was also diagnosed as bipolar in the early 2000s after having been declared chemically depressed for thirty years--she was diagnosed as a bipolar (manic depressive) who has never had a manic episode but possibly could. (It was quite a popular diagnosis for awhile.). My brain has changed so much from when I was nineteen, and my life as well, that I want to know if I truly still need mood stabilizers--if not then I do not want to be taking them because Seroquel is not easy on the body. It is entirely possible that it's just wishful thinking, a sad hope that I won't have to take this uber sedating medication forever, but it's worth a try. I never did anything dangerous while manic, just watched excessive amounts of TV rather than make friends and picked up new hobbies. We will see how this goes and if I do experience mood swings then maybe once I am off Seroquel my psychiatrist can try some drugs with less impact on life quality. Because that is what Seroquel does--it interferes with my quality of life by making it tough to lose weight, making me feel hungover when I wake up every single day, and leaving me so dependent on its chemical properties that (unlike my other drugs) if I forget to pick it up at the pharmacy and miss one single pill then I can't sleep and have severe withdrawal symptoms. Talk about miserable.

Has anyone else on here taken Seroquel for its mood stabilizing qualities? If so, how old were you when you started (I was 20) and how long have you been on it (almost nine years for me)? Also, are you still on it or did you find another drug?

[AniaR]

I didn't but I took Elavil for a number of years because it helped with my chronic pain. But it made me so tired. I'd need to sleep 10--12 hours at night. Then I'd need a nap. I gained 30lbs. Was dizzy a lot. I totally had the hangover.

I won't lie. Getting off it was hard. I was only on 30 mg and it took 6 weeks going down by 5 each week and even that was brutal. But when I finally got off it I felt great within two weeks and now I realize how much it effected my life.

I was off them for over a year but my nerve pain has been unbearable lately and it is causing me anxiety and sleepless nights. Trying Zoloft at the moment. So far it is making me sick to my stomach and nothing else. But doc said it will take 3-6 weeks before I notice any change.

It is still easier for me than pumping myself full of pain meds. In both cases the added effect of anti depressant/ anti anxiety helped me get through tough times even though it wasn't the intended purpose.

But getting off elavil was like a fog was lifted. You'll have a hard journey ahead getting off yours after having been on it for so long. But I do believe you'll feel better for it.

[Seatan]

Yeah, I agree... The thing about deciding what meds to take is what a careful balance it is. Are the side effects worth the direct effects? How much are you risking future Heath by staying on very powerful medications long term? Is the possibility of things like liver failure at a relatively young age worth what you are getting in the here and now. With Seroquel I have been on it so long that I just don't KNOW what effect it has on my bipolar disorder anymore so I can't even begin to guess whether or not the pros are worth the cons. And, unfortunately, the only way to know is to get off it for awhile and see. And after eight years I think it is time to reassess and make sure Seroquel is still actually benefitting me enough to be worth the instant side effects and the long term effects.

[AniaR]

Yup I think you're right. Plus our brains are so different when we're teens to when we're adults. I know I took ADHD meds for a while and they said in younger people they made ADHD worse but in adults helped. lol that's a pretty big swing!

[BriannaPixieDee]

I think I got lucky when I started Seroquel (I was 21 at the time - Ill be 23 soon). Because I'm on the slow release formula and I rarely have the side effects you had. But, then again mine isn't treating just my Manic Bipolar symptoms either.

I have reflex seizures caused by a malformation in my neck, and Seroquel has helped me from having them a lot. Due to this I may never get off of them unless I get health care and not just saftey net (then i can get the surgery needed to fix that malformation), but I can say the not enough sleep thing is a big deal.

For me if I can get uninterrupted sleep for 9 hours I am fine and dandy. But, if someone wakes me up midway is when I have some serious issues with moodiness, migraines and other not so nice symptoms such as the weight gain, nose bleeds, and etc. It's not a fun ride. It's different for everyone it seems, the only withdrawal issues I ever had was when I was on Lamictal - ugh that stuff was just not right. I had horrific nose bleeds and fainting spells. It got so bad I was hospitalized once for it. I'm glad I stopped taking those, I hated who I was on them. I was not nice at all.

I'm hoping one day I won't NEED these meds and can work out the issues and fix them. But, for now I'm stuck. I'm glad to see others lives have improved when they were able to switch to something lighter or get off of them completely.

[Merman Chatfish]

One of my doctors told me I will probably never be able to come off my antidepressants. But then I still don't have friends to hang out with and even with my meds I have really bad depression every weekend.

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