Existential Mer crisis...Advice anyone?

[MermaidSabrina]

(Long rant ahead,but I seriously need help,it really would mean a lot to me.) :(

Hey,Sorry if I categorized this wrong,and you don't know me...I'm not on the network very often,but we are all like one big family.I've had a lot going on in my recent life,leaving me out of the pod,which is really stressing me out to the point of wanting to quit being a mermaid,The hobby I've loved for so long,even though at 16 years of age I haven't really lived too long...

Let's start my story leading up to the current problem,when I was ten I started mermaiding with a fabric tail,got two or three more after outgrowing them,yada yada. When I was 14 I checked and noticed that I stopped growing for almost a year and I managed to raise $1500 all by myself by saving for a dream tail,bake sales,craft shows,and working.I gave the money to my mom and asked if I could lend some money for a tail,she didn't understand it all,but she was supportive and we soon were in the process of making a tail with mernation

it was great,I loved it.Considering I lived in a city I could just go and practice at a hotel pool and it would be no big deal,It wasn't heavy because I always lift heavy things and have strong legs,and I felt so much freedom,and that all my problems wouldn't stop me...(I have severe problems with low self esteem,depression,anxiety and bipolar disorder)

In spring 2014 I had a problem with my leg after a rough tumble,so I went to the doctor,just to learn I strained it,and I had a severe muscle tear which was causing issues,and that I wasn't able to do any straining activities with my legs for quite a while Until after it healed and they figured out what's wrong with it.

Alas...time went by and I was better and able to do more things,however by now we moved to a small town in a different state,and settled in.I learned word gets around fast in this town and the kids here are extremely cruel (like to the point of a few committing suicide and me almost doing it) about the tiniest weird thing they can find.If they found out I was a mermaid,I'd never hear the end of it

Next summer rolls around and I take my tail to my uncles beach house (different state) for a few weeks,and get the tail on no struggle,mostly just sitting on a dock and seeing reactions of kids,as my muscle was still healing.Time goes by and now we are at last week.

Last week after my mom told me we were going to mermania,I went to go try on my tail,after losing quite some weight,to see if I'd need it to be sent back for adjusting.I went to go pick up and I did something that never happened before,I almost threw my back out!and it seemed impossible to roll Down the silicone,it seemed ten times thicker then ever,and being a mernation tail,it is infamously thick silicone.

I was weaker than ever...I need somewhere to swim so I can retrain,but it can't be anywhere near this town...and I honestly don't know or doubt anyone in NC near Roanoke Rapids would let a mermaid borrow their pool...I really want to be a mermaid and have fun..but I don't want my personal life to be hell...I need to retrain myself because I don't want to drown but I don't know where I'm supposed to go,and I know it's stupid,but it's stressing me out..

Any mers got suggestions?I just don't know what to do,I don't mean to seem whiny,but I'm trying to figure out how to make this work,and I can't find much help. >.<

[Mermaid Wesley]

It's frustrating when you lose muscle. Jut take it really slow and careful. Get some lube or coconut oil to make getting in the tail easier and do land workouts. I'm always surprised at how much hand and arm strength is necessary for this stuff, but that can be one of the hardest parts of handling a thick silicone tail from what I've seen.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Alea]

First of all, I am really sorry that there are mean kids where you live. :( When I was younger I was picked on for being different and then as I got older (maybe around the middle of high school) I stopped caring about what others think. That really helped but I know that is easier said than done and I hope you can find a good way to avoid them/not let them get to you.

Perhaps you could find a secret swimming hole or swimming creek in the wilderness to go to where the mean kids don't really go. North Carolina has some nice creeks right? Maybe a kayaking rental place will know of some good spots.

Since you are worried about attracting attention for being a mermaid, perhaps you could get some regular swim fins at Wal-Mart and practice doing a dolphin kick in those. If anyone asks you can say you are training to free-dive or to go on a snorkeling trip or something 'normal' sounding. Heck, you can even say that you are exercising.

Even when I have my monofin with me I get looks and questions so I definitely think that getting some cheep regular swim fins will help avoid any unwanted attention.

I realllly hope this helps! :hug:

[Echidna]

I'm not sure what the existential crisis is (mean kids? thickness of tail? bodily weakness?), it's been a long night.

If you are not strong enough to don and swim in a silicone tail without putting yourself in danger, you have three options: 1- train without a tail, maybe with a monofin, until you got your strength back
2- if you can't motivate yourself to train without a tail, you can make yourself a fabric training tail for little expense
3- do normal workouts on land until you regain your muscle.

good luck.

[Mermaid Lily_Pad]

I was horribly bullied where I used to love when I was a kid. Kids can be positively evil. *hugs* I'm sorry you have to go through that but trust me...it gets better. Once high school ends, people go their separate ways and the mean kids find out that their crap doesn't fly in college or at the work place. It's like a whole other world and you just have to be strong enough and patient enough to get there. Congrats on going to Mermania! That's so exciting! I think your best bet is some rehab with light weights, and strength and core training on the floor. You will get stronger, it just takes time. If you ever need somebody to vent to in private, if your having a tough time, send me a message. I helped my best friend and her daughter when they were going through the same thing. i was also diagnosed with everything you have but it turns out I have PTSD which was brining on symptoms of bi polar, depression and anxiety. Once she I understood that, and started to focus on the exact reason I always felt down or stressed I was able yo learn tenchiques to help. Hang in their, you sound like a very intelligent, and eloquent young lady. Take it one step (or swish of your tail) at a time.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Sweetheart I say this in the most loving way possible...

tell those kids to go fuck themselves. ��

[PearlieMae]

Wesley, Alea, Echidna, Mermaid Lily Pad and Sea GLass Siren all have very sound advice (Sea Glass Siren is my spirit animal!). I know, too, the pains of being bullied, and there are tons of advice on how to deal with bullies that I won't rehash here. But basically, just rise above. Regaining strength will probably take more than the few weeks before Mermainia, but there are no rules that say you can't sit poolside and look fabulous! You are going to have so much fun and meet so many cool people! You will find that there is a great big Out There out there, and if small-minded children have nothing better to do than pick on you, well, they are just mad that they are going to have to live small, uninteresting lives.

Be fierce. Embrace what makes you wonderful and don't let anyone tell you any different!

34596

[SeaGlass Siren]

^ ALL of What pearlie said. Let it go. In a few more years their bullying will never bother you anyway

and by let it go I mean unleash that inner mermaid!

[Saren]

I used to be bullied. My reaction wasn't healthy and I decided if I made people think I was out of my mind, they wouldn't mess with me anymore. It worked...but I got expelled in the end.

You wanna lead a covert mermaid life? I got you.
1. Yoga. You don't even have to pay for classes, youtube has some great videos (I even found a mermaid yoga video for core strength once).
2. If you don't want to be seen at the gym, there are some great body weight workouts you can do in the comfort of your house.
3. As said before get some normal swim fins or a finis foil. If anyone asks your a swimmer looking to improve your dolphin kick.

If you want any videos or examples of exercises let me know I'll PM you. I've been keeping my mermaiding on the DL too, for different reasons, but your reasons are as valid as any. I wish you luck and that those bullies get what's coming to them.

[MermaidSabrina]

Thanks guys :) it means a lot to me that you guys are giving me advice,I know it seems like a lot is on my mind,but I just want to get it all off my fluke for the time being, thanks Pearlie,Wesley,Echidna and all the other mers I forgot to mention.haha

[Vrindavana Starfish]

Wesley, Alea, Echidna, Mermaid Lily Pad and Sea GLass Siren all have very sound advice (Sea Glass Siren is my spirit animal!). I know, too, the pains of being bullied, and there are tons of advice on how to deal with bullies that I won't rehash here. But basically, just rise above. Regaining strength will probably take more than the few weeks before Mermainia, but there are no rules that say you can't sit poolside and look fabulous! You are going to have so much fun and meet so many cool people! You will find that there is a great big Out There out there, and if small-minded children have nothing better to do than pick on you, well, they are just mad that they are going to have to live small, uninteresting lives.

Be fierce. Embrace what makes you wonderful and don't let anyone tell you any different!

34596

I agree with everything PearlieMae said and 1000% with what SeaGlass said. I also went to school in NC so I know the kind of pressure you face. If you stay strong (and really do tell them to eff themselves) then they lose their power to manipulate you. Tell them you have a modeling career as a mermaid, and it's a job. That will probably make them jealous and they'll shut up. They're just idiot kids, and they're miserable to be around now, but you won't be around them forever.

Also, get back in the water, even if it's just with a mono fin and swim swim swim! Maybe hit the gym when not in the water, but don't push yourself too hard or you'll get injured again. And HAVE FUN AT MERMANIA!!!

[MermaidSabrina]

Thanks Vrin! :) (is it okay if I call you that?) and I definitely will :)

[Vrindavana Starfish]

Yeah that's ok. Most people call me Vrindi for short. :)

[MermaidSabrina]

I know this thread should be dead already xD,but a week later I have some wonderful news.I put on my tail and had no problem lifting up my fluke this time :D just a bit of strain,mainly foot cramps,yet again that happens when you go a while without wearing a monofin.Thanks for all your encouraging words and I can't wait to see some of you at mermania,although my swimming might be a bit weaker than usual,I'm still excited! :)

[Mermaid Alea]

Great!
Your tail is beautiful by the way!

[MermaidSabrina]

Thanks!so is yours!

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