Snappy Comebacks!

[Aradia]

Merfolk,
I've been trying to get together my "story" for when I do appearances for little imperfections that some kids love pointing out. The most frustrating one is kids pointing out knees or poking your tail and declaring its legs. So far I haven't had much experience explaining away these things and I was curious what other merfolk have come up with. I wouldn't mind so much except some kids take such pride in destroying the magic for other kiddies. Ideas/stories/suggestions?

[MermaidAubrin]

Child: I can see your knees!!!
You: "Well, I am actually turning into a human! So my tail starts looking some what legish during the transition"

Em then say why you want to be a human for a bit? haha I have no clue

[WaveMaker04]

Child: I can see your knees!!
You: Have you ever met a real mermaid other than me?
Child: No.
You: Well then how do you know that mermaids aren't supposed to have knees?
Child: O_o.......

[Bellasea]

^^ that can work with almost anything....until the child says yes I have met a mermaid before.

[Ayla of Duluth]

^^ that can work with almost anything....until the child says yes I have met a mermaid before.
If a child says they've met a mermaid, you can distract them and turn the conversation around on them. "yes I've met a mermaid before" and then before they can disprove you, you come out with "oh really? Where did you see it? What color was it? Did they talk?" and so on.

[Bellasea]

That's a good idea. :)

[BlueMermaid]

I say I have bones in my tail just like they have bones in their legs. For the ones that insist I'm not real, I say it's much more fun to pretend I'm real and wink at um. They let up after that.

[Kanti]

"Oh you silly child, only humans have knees! That there is my vestigial patella complex. Everyone knows that!"

[New York Mermaid]

Yep Mermaids have knees, just like humans do, but until our tail becomes legs- our knees are fused together, how else do you expect us to walk around when we're in human form?

[Ayla of Duluth]

Of course we have knees. How else would we bend our tail and swim?

[AniaR]

I saw the bones thing too :) fish have bones

[Aradia]

At one point I was tempted to make a fake anatomy chart with the knees and ankles incorporated into mer-bones. I love the idea that the knees start to become more defined as you turn human, thats a fantastic idea :D

[Mermaid Saphira]

Yep Mermaids have knees, just like humans do, but until our tail becomes legs- our knees are fused together, how else do you expect us to walk around when we're in human form?
I use this one, too. I always tell them that I am only haft mermaid and haft human. I turn into a mermaid in the water but when I come on land my tail turns into legs. This also prevents the confusion for when the child sees you with legs. ;)

[Mermaid Dottie]

I'm half selkie. I have to be really careful, because If I leave my other skin lying around someone could steal it, and then I'd have to grant them a wish and I am SO BAD at granting wishes. Like this one time......[insert poorly granted wish story here]

[Mermaid Saphira]

^ I like that idea, Dottie! Very good :3

[MerEmma]

"Oh you silly child, only humans have knees! That there is my vestigial patella complex. Everyone knows that!"

Ahaha, I love this one. xD

[Mermaid Pickles]

I say I have bones in my tail just like they have bones in their legs. For the ones that insist I'm not real, I say it's much more fun to pretend I'm real and wink at um. They let up after that.

Same here. =.=

[Koral]

I have favorites, but not about knees. They never fail. Usually, it turns into the child and I arguing and repeating ourselves until we both burst into laughter and gain a strange understanding of one another. I actually like these kids, I've had SO MANY like this and it always ends in smiles and giggles.

"Are you a real mermaid?"
'Are you a real human?'
or
"You're not real!"
'But I'm really here!'
"But you're not a real mermaid!"
'Are you a real human?!'
or something along those lines - I just make it a fun argument.

I actually rarely get asked about my knees. I DO get accused of having legs though. I just say it's my skin, muscle, and fish bones. That must make them think I guess, cause so far they stop asking. It helps when the tail feels like scales, reduces the related questions.

[courtneymermaid]

Ha ha, I've come across this too! I feel sad for some kids who lack imagination these days. I'll often make a judgement call based on how old the child to determine my response. If I know they are old enough to know the difference then I'll let them ask questions about my tail and how I made it and that often gets them right back in the spirit of fantasy. :P

Kid: Are you a real mermaid?
Me: Well, I'm real and I'm a mermaid so yes!

Kid: I can see your feet!
Me: Those aren't feet, those are flippers (true ;) ) and it's the way my species has evolved back from once having had legs.

Kid: You have knees!!
Me: And? I'm part human, I'm allowed. ;)

[TheSolitarySiren]

Child: How do mermaids have babies?

I get asked this quite often when in discussion of the topic. I never know how to respond. Normally, I would straight up tell them how, but seeing that they're a child and they're not my child, I couldn't. What would you all say?

[Koral]

That's a good question, Siren! I would be uncomfortable answering it too. Maybe we can think up an aquatic version of the stork? ;)

Oh I recalled another question I am frequently asked!

"I wanna be a mermaid too! / How can I be a mermaid? / How did you get your tail?"
'It's magic, but only parents can understand the magic!'
At this point if they're really interested, they ask their mom or dad. If their parents actually want to know, or wanna get one for their kid, they come over to me and I tell them some tailmakers. It's also a good way to give parents my card, by writing some info on the back of it for them.

[Elle]

Child: How do mermaids have babies?

I get asked this quite often when in discussion of the topic. I never know how to respond. Normally, I would straight up tell them how, but seeing that they're a child and they're not my child, I couldn't. What would you all say?

answer "in the water.."
Sorry couldn't help it. It's like being asked how do you eat that? or How can you sleep at night? My answers are usually "with my mouth" and "in a bed" or "with my eyes closed"

alternatively you can say the same way seals and dolphins have babies...?

[MerEmma]

If someone asked me how mers had babies, I'd probably just shrug cheerfully and answer, "Magic!"

[Koral]

Dude "Magic" is the answer to everything a kid asks.

[MerEmma]

Ahahaha, so true. xD

[Mermaid Celissa]

My answer to the babies question:

"When two merpeople are in love, they ask for a child. A manta ray swoops down and gives them a little merbaby wrapped in kelp."

It worked with a little girl of about five last summer, she thought it was adorable.

[Ashe]

^ Aw, that is so cute! :3

[Goldie]

I'm half selkie. I have to be really careful, because If I leave my other skin lying around someone could steal it, and then I'd have to grant them a wish and I am SO BAD at granting wishes. Like this one time......[insert poorly granted wish story here]

Oh I have been using this one too :)

[SeaSister]

Ahhh I love the selkie story! I've been wondering myself how to explain taking a tail off, but the selkie story would work so well for that! If the kids don't know what a selkie is, either, just explaining it to them would probably be enough to distract them from their other "you're not a real mermaid!" accusations or questions. XD