to get a tail or not...?

[Mermaid Annariea]

okay guys, here is my dilemma.
i have wanted a tail ever since i saw one of hannah frasers videos for the first time, about 3, 3 1/2 years ago. (before that, i had no idea swimmable tails even existed).
NOW, for my 19th birthday in early july, my parents are giving me money. im not positive on the exact amount yet, but i know it will be enough to get a tail from mermaid parties with the pretty oceanika fins, and still have some money left.
HOWEVER, my parents and grandparents keep saying i should wait, because hobbies shouldnt be my first priority. but... it isnt just a hobby to me, and i also feel like maybe they dont take me seriously. im not completely positive, but regardless, i really REALLY want to find an aquarium that would hire me to be a mermaid in one of their (hopefully shark-less, im not that gutsy yet) tanks, but id like to have my own tail first.
so, im really not sure what to do. i dont want them complaining because i spend my money on mermaid things, but at the same time, theyre giving it to ME. and its for my birthday, so i feel like... if i want it this bad, then i should be allowed to get it for myself without anyone hassling me about it. im just lucky i have a boyfriend who thinks its awesome that i wanna be a mermaid.
my question is, what should i do??
also, im going to post a picture of my design so you guys can see :3

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sorry about the awful picture quality, it was from my webcam since my gpop doesnt have the printer/scanner working at the moment.
also, the fins on the side and on the bottom, im not sure if i would want them as one solid thing like i have in the picture (which would be without the black lines and probably made out of a mesh-like fabric), or if i want them how hannah fraser has them, just in that general shape and made with cut (and clear) chair roller plastic material stuff (sorry, its late, and my brain has forgotten what it is called for the night -_- ). ALSO (geez), should i have the fleshy-toned top, or should it just be purple (or blue?).
if you guys could help me with those design questions, thatd be great too.

well. there is my problem. i hope you guys can help me out :( i feel like everyone is expecting so many different things from me, and i cant do it all.

[Mermaid Narina]

follow your dreams!!!!! aha :P
your design is gorgeous! i think a purple top would look great :)
well im a starter mermaid about to make my first tail, and i have the same things. my parents keep saying "you're young, dont waste your money". what i want to do is to prove its a worthwhile ambition.
have you seen on hannah frasers page she has some tips on being a mermaid for hire? http://www.hannahfraser.com/mermaid/
i think if you researched it and showed them how much it means to you, theyd be more inclined to agree with you spending your money on a tail :)
hope it helps!

[Mermaid Annariea]

thanks so much natasha (:
ive actually researched it quite a bit, so im not sure why they dont agree with it. ugh, silly parents. i love them though, lol.

[Blondie]

I was JUST in your position. I had recently graduated and got enough money for a tail. But I knew my family would be upset if I got one because I should be putting the money toward schooling and an apartment one day.

I seriously spent nights awake just trying to figure out what I wanted to do. I asked the Mernetwork and they advised me to go for it. I still felt like I shouldn't do it because I was afraid I wouldn't swim in it enough, and it was $200. I could do a lot with that. Then I realized, "One week of work is about $330 for me. I would earn back the tail in ONE week." So I contacted Mermaid Parties and bought my tail from Stevi.

And seriously after letting that money go, I felt SO free and happy. I bought something I had wanted for YEARS. It felt so amazing to get something you've just wanted.

My advice to you is do it. You'll feel a little unsure about it, but once you get your payment cleared, you'll be so happy you did it. I'm getting my tail in the next week or so hopefully if Stevi is on schedule. I'm THRILLED. I really am! You'll be so happy once you do it.

[Spindrift]

to get a tail or not...?

What?! Why is that even a question. I don't even.

Lol. Money is money. You can always make more. Of course, that's not an excuse to spend it frivolously or irresponsibly, but I don't see why you can't use it on a hobby. Hobbies keep people out of trouble anyway. For me personally, I've been in this mermaiding deal "officially" since probably around 2008. So I'm pretty sure I'm serious about this hobby and I am completely guilt-free when I spend money on it. I personally think you should go for it - I mean at least it's only $200 or so instead of say... $1000+ like my tails... Hah. It's like almost the same price as a fancy pair of shoes.

The design looks cool! I hope MermaidParties does it justice :)

[Raivynn]

If I had it to do over again, I would have ordered a long time ago, when I first realized that mermaiding was a hobby. :D At first, you're going to be like, "oh my gosh, I can't believe I spent $____ on this." Parents don't always understand why we do what we do, but they're human. We're all like that. My mom thought it was weird, and she couldn't believe I spent the amount of money I did on my two tails that I have ordered. I, however, feel so free when I get into the water with my tail. The first swim was a bit rocky, but as I became accustomed to the dolphin kick ... it just became natural. I used the dolphin kick swimming most of the time and never realized it ...

Go for it!!! You will be so happy you did!!

[Alveric]

'You only go 'round once.' I know it's a cliche, but it's true none-the-less. It's joy that gets you through the rough parts of life, so grab the joy when you can. It's not like it was your retirement.

[Mermaid Annariea]

you guys are all so awesome. thanks for the awesome advice :D youre all right... im gonna go for it as soon as i have the money, and ill keep you all updated on when i order it and pictures and stuff.
seriously. thanks SO much. <3

[Cordelia]

Birthday money = fun money. It's not given to you to pay rent, pay for car repairs, or any of that. You should spend it on something that is fun and makes you happy! :D

[spottedcatfish]

Sorry to make waves.... but I do see both sides here. I have been in a similar but different situation, where I have had money to spend and I really wanted to get something that was commissioned and at that time I was just starting out, with this hobby. This was also before I had any major bills, i.e car insurance, health ins. ect to pay every month. So I really wanted this commissioned item. So I went ahead and commissioned it, without having a conversation with my parents about any of this... When my folks found out they were beside themselves and very upset. The artist also had some issues too, and though I finally got what I had paid in full for, I had to "fight" to get it ... so I really went through hell with this somewhat impulse purchase. This was about four years ago. I have since learned from that whole drama, and today I do have expenses I must pay every month. I also know what I can afford and what my limits are as to what I should save up for.

I too would love to get a tail... but I know that it is out of my budget currently. Here's my suggestion, and also what I plan to do. I would strongly advise not to spend the whole amount on a tail. I know this is hard to resist... but I have a suggestion that may help you and your parents cooperate much better. Use some of the money to get a monofin, and swim around in that, and get used to swimming in a monofin, first, before you get the tail. This will help by getting you used to the sensation of swimming in a tail, w/out the added restictive-ness that a tail gives. It will help your relationship with your parents, by showing your dedication to mermaiding, but without the family problems that have a good chance of happening if you got the full tail.

Also, have you considered making a tail?

[Mermaid Annariea]

spottedcatfish, well, it isnt really just an impulse, since ive been looking into tail makers and tail-making for about three years now... im planning to get one from mermaid parties, so even if i bought one from them, itd only be a bit more than what i would spend on materials to make my own, since i dont want a fabric one. that would also take time and skill, which i dont have... im creative, but not necessarily a seamstress. im already fully comfortable swimming with the dolphin kick, and sometimes (this is going to sound lame), i even tie up my feet to feel more... i dont know, like im in a tail? its weird, i know, haha. but all a monofin would do is add propulsion, which im also comfortable with because ive worn flippers as well.
the tail wouldnt cost the entire amount either, id still have about $200 or so left, and ill put half of that into a savings bank and leave the other half alone for a while...
i completely understand you and my parents' point of view... but i think that if i dont do this, ill end up wishing i had :/ and i dont think theres any point in wishing i had done something sooner, especially because its summer right now, haha.

[malinghi]

Haha, what a surprise- you asked a mermaiding forum whether you should buy a tail and everyone said you should.

Ultimately its your call, and I can see that you want it pretty badly, but whatever you do, I encourage you to be responsible. I can imagine what your parents might be thinking. You're 19, so you're either about to become financially independent, or you already became independent recently, and your top priority for spending your money is something you don't urgently need. How much do you currently earn? How long would it take for you to raise the money yourself? Paying for it with your own money would be a great way to prove that that you're serious, and responsible.

[Mermaid Annariea]

malinghi, haha thats true.

im trying to be responsible while still trying to get closer to my dream... ive been researching tail makers and tail-making for about three years now, so its not a new thing to my parents. they kept telling me "wait a while, it isnt important," so id feel like i was being stupid and i would end up not getting it.
currently, im sort of bouncing around the country, so its hard to find a job since im not really in one place for more than a few months. sometime soon, im going to decide where im going to stay (nj with my gparents, va with my boyfriend of 5 years, cali with my parents, or arizona with my bfs mom) and get a job. ive thought about starting to babysit, since it doesnt have to be an all-the-time thing, but i can still get a little bit of money here and there.
also, the tail wouldnt use all the money. id put half of (or probably most of) whatever was left into savings, which i dont touch. thats saving for college or an apartment or whatever my future may hold, haha.
im just not really sure what to do. i think im being mostly responsible about this, it isnt like i just got into mermaiding and want to blow all my money... -sigh- this is all rather difficult.

[Mermaid Marissa]

I think you should follow your dreams till the end of the earth and back again :D your design is amazing and I think you have a good plan going for yourself and that you should just follow your heart :) I also agree that you should have a purple top or even a gold top instead I think that will be gorgeous.

[Mermaid Annariea]

thanks, marissa :D

[Mermaid Annariea]

ive decided to hold out, just for a bit... im going to be travelling to virginia again to see my boyfriend, so i need to make sure im going to have the money.
-sigh-
waiting is awful.

[Mermaid Caidence]

I know what you mean :(

[Mermaid Annariea]

yeah, it really sucks :(
but my boyfriend > mermaiding.
i cant cuddle with a mermaid tail xD so i gotta wait, lol.

[Merman Dan]

Ask your boyfriend for a mermaid tail, then? ;)

[Mermaid Annariea]

hahahah xD
he actually has said before that he would like to help me, but hes sort of struggling with money right now, trying to get a job and such... so i dont wanna do that, haha. i have the money... just...
-sigh-

[Merman Dan]

Swimming as a mermaid in Second Life is free, if you know where to find the free tails/avatars. That can do, in a pinch.

[Mermaid Annariea]

i might look into that, haha.

[Mermaid Annariea]

im going for it.
ill have enough for both my trip to tylers and my mermaid tail.
so, i decided im going to do it.
just emailed mermaid parties. :D

[Mermaid Annariea]

boom. money went through. im gonna have a tail in like... a month. :DD
AHHHH IM SO EXCITED GUYS.

[malinghi]

congratulations!

[Mermaid Annariea]

thanks! i cant wait :D

[Lyna]

i waited and watched prices for 6 full years before getting my tail. and the entire time i've HATED having to wait. i never doubted wanting a tail....but i did doubt that it was appropriate for me to spend that kind of money on something other people could see as so selfish. really wish i had never listened and started saving a long time ago. i'm already designing a custom silicone tail, and i just ordered my first latex one late march.

[spottedcatfish]

Congrats. I'm glad to see that I worked out in the end.

[Mermaid Annariea]

lyna, SIX YEARS?? D: i would die. but im glad you have one now :D

spottedcatfish, thanks (:

[Lyna]

yes ma'am....6 years ago i discovered mertailor. he was the only option at the time and i had never known the possibility was out there aside from special effects wardrobe designers for movies, and who could afford that?!?! and sadly...4 months after ordering...i am still waiting... :(

[Mermaid Annariea]

youre STILL waiting on your tail?!?
thats terrible, im so sorry :( im glad i waited a bit longer, otherwise i would have bought one from the mertailor... even though his silicone tails are nice (from what ive heard), i think ive only heard one or two good reviews about the latex ones.
also, your shell bra in your picture is very pretty :D

[Lyna]

awe thnak you. that was my frst attempt. i made itthis week. ad yes, i'm designing silicone tail with jese at mermaid creations now. :)

[Mermaid Annariea]

wow, really? your first attempt?? well geez, its incredible (:
and ive heard hes really good, i hope you get the tail of your dreams :D

[Lyna]

yup. this week im working on a belt, 2 necklaces, some barettes....

[Mermaid Annariea]

wow, thats awesome... maybe you should start an etsy for it all and sell it. (:

[Lyna]

my husband keeps encouraging me to...but i already run my own tattoo business....
but if i get requests from people on here i'll be willing to arrange whatnot. :D

[Mermaid Annariea]

haha, that works too (: