How do I tell my boyfriend that I'm a mermaid!?

[Mermaid Elena]

I've been dating this guy for about a year and we're still completely mad over each other. I'm planning on making a tail this summer and there is no way I can just not tell him. Whats the best way to tell him? Do you think he will be weirded out? For other mermaids with significant others or spouses, how does your partner feel about it?

:$ I'm a little nervous about this so any advice is greatly appreciated!

[telzey.amberdon]

Watch Eric on obsessive compulsions and tell him you like the tails.

[Mahi Mermaid]

Like Eric andMatt, I told my boyfriend the first day I met him and he loved it! Everyone always laughs, at first, because they think it's some sort of a joke. but then when they realize you're serious they see you as a creative independent woman who goes after what she wants! He also loves me for it, we take pictures together..he's a diver..i'm a mermaid, we're a perfect match! His dad even calls me 'the mermaid'....

[Mermaid Tula]

Start showing him pictures of people in tails, then tell him that you really like them and you're going to make a tail yourself

[Jenna/Angelfish]

If he's mad over you then he will accept you for who you are if he's not then cut the line and be all you are!!! Do not ever compromise a single bit on the inner self!! Just tell him you grew it ;) because truly in your heart you did!!

[Goldie]

Oh! Freakin great idea about showing pics of other mers. I wish I had thought of that. subtlety is not my strong suit :)

[Spindrift]

I mean, obviously it depends on the person. I can think of people who wouldn't want to be associated with a mermaid for a girlfriend, but I can also see a lot of people being very supportive. You can see what he thinks about similar things (cosplay, costumes, etc) if you want to be beat around the bush a little. I would just outright tell him though.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Convince him with boobs lol


Im joking. What I did was " hey I'm gonna get a mermaid tail ok? Ok." and just subtly be like " hey did ja know there are mermaid performers that get paid xdollars/ hr? " dropped some random factoids.. and he grew to appreciate mers. At first he was like ehhh but now he's ok with it. I like the idea of just subtly hinting it.

What i also did was the First time I put the tail on for him to see I told him " hey can u imagine me shirtless in this? Can't tell if I should or should not wear a bra with it" that's when he really supported it.


Dunno.. We have quite an active sexual lifestyle so lol...

[Aziara]

I wish my husband was more supportive. He just gets this pinched look every time I say anything about mermaids. He doesn't like me showing skin, so he keeps insisting on a 'modest' top. Arg! As long as my jiggly bits are covered I'm fine, you prude! (Sorry, ranting, I know)

[Ashe]

If he he loves you for you, he will be totally fine with it I'm sure! I don't have a boyfriend, but a really good guy friend was sitting next to me and saw a plan for a tail I'm planning to make. He asked me if I was going to actually wear it, and when I said yes, he thought it was pretty cool! Later I found out that he is a cosplayer so he would probably understand better than most guys. A second time like that happened was when another real good friend of mine and I were texting and we were just saying random stuff like quotes from videos and just really random stuff xD. Anyways, I said "Ok, what if I told you I was a mermaid?" He replied "haha suuuuure" so I sent him picture of me in a tail and he thought it was pretty awesome too! He then caught on and figured out that Isis is a mer,too and that is how it all came to be :P
So, I think the if he likes you for who you are that he should be fine with it :)

[Nate Walis]

I can never understand why people would react in a negative manner to such a piece of information, really I'm lost for words and can't empathise whatsoever. Your partner is basically telling you that they engage in a pastime that shows them to be creative, free-spirited and able to imagine a side of themselves that transcends the mundane. Not only that, but they are also portraying one of the most graceful and beautiful creatures ever imagined in myth and legend. A negative reaction to that would say far more about the person giving it than the one receiving it, in my opinion at least.

[Alveric]

I believe most guys (I'm speaking as a guy here) think mermaids are hot. It's hard for me to even imagine some guy being turned off, but I guess weirder things happen.

[Alveric]

;) I'm not surprised that Nate said the same thing at the same time, only better.

[Nate Walis]

I are literate...

[Mermaid Elena]

I told him last night and he said it was different but not weird. I think he's cool with it but doesn't want to be majorly involved. He was really nice though and told me that he would even swim with me as a mermaid sometime. I think it will take some time for him to understand the creative and artistic value of mermaids but I'm just really glad I told him! Thank you guys for all the support!

[Alveric]

Now you have a mertender, better than a wheelchair any day.

[Ashe]

Yay! :D

[MerAnthony]

:thumbs up::yay::group hug:

[Taylor is a Mermaid]

I worried about this too when my boyfriend and I first started dating. Luckily, he has his own "thing" I could use to find some common ground: he loooves zombies, and he lives, eats, and breathes all things scary. He used to work at a haunted house and scare people so badly they peed themselves! So I told him mermaids are my "thing" just like zombies are his. I then showed him my Facebook page and said, "I know this is super nerdy, but I love it." His response was "nerdy? Are you kidding? This is so cool!" He calls me his little mermaid and painted me a zombie mermaid for my birthday last year to symbolize the melding of our hobbies. (A few days later I told him I loved him the first time. Coincidence?)
Fast forward to a few weeks ago, and I found out some people were gossiping about my mermaid page at work. I was devastated. I called him after school in tears, and he was just furious at first, but then he said, "You'll always be my mermaid. I LOVE that you're a mermaid, and you should never, ever be ashamed of it." He loves me and totally gets it, and I'm sure your partner will too.
Even his family knows about my mermaiding. My bf's parents saw my tail and insisted I show the rest of the family because they thought it was so cool. His cousin calls me "my mermaid" too, and she loves my tail. I think most people will surprise you with how accepting they are, especially if they already know and love you! The only people who have ever had any kind of negative reaction are a few people I really don't know, but even the majority of strangers are open to it and think it's neat.
I should mention I don't look like the traditional mermaid (I'm overweight and no supermodel), and my tail is a fabric tail with some design flaws. Even so, people still greet my bizarre hobby with curiosity and wonder.

[Spindrift]

That is really lame of your co-workers. I try to keep my mermaiding out of my real life but there has been some necessary overlaps, and its something I'm still figuring out. Still though, they should have better things to do (like their work) lol.

[Mermaid Dottie]

My husband was fully supportive when I said "Honey, I'm gonna buy this fin, and fabric, and make a mermaid tail, okay?"

[Taylor is a Mermaid]

Yeah, it is lame. It hurt, but I got over it. I know they ran and told my boss, but my instincts were correct: he must not have cared because we had a meeting today, and he didn't say one word about it.

[telzey.amberdon]

My wife is a mermaid. My wife is hot. Logic suggests all mermaids are hot when my wife is not watching.

[Mermaid Kelda]

I think my boyfriend's only qualm was the price xD when I told him I'd spent $1500 on a mermaid tail, he was like "But... groceries! And rent!"
But it's not like I'm putting myself in debt by buying a tail, this was from my own savings. He just likes to have a little more in the bank than I do :P

[Nate Walis]

Yeah, it is lame. It hurt, but I got over it. I know they ran and told my boss, but my instincts were correct: he must not have cared because we had a meeting today, and he didn't say one word about it.

God alone knows what the fact that you dress up as a mermaid would have to do with your day job, so why on earth would your co-workers have wanted to tell the boss?

[Traveling Merman]

This saying fits I think; those that mind don't matter, and those that matter won't mind.

[Taylor is a Mermaid]

God alone knows what the fact that you dress up as a mermaid would have to do with your day job, so why on earth would your co-workers have wanted to tell the boss?
I really have no clue. The only reason I even know is that one of the women I work with had the decency to come tell me what was going on. I don't know who it was, but I do know that the people I actually work closely with and know weren't part of it. So I've just been living by the philosophy Traveling Merman stated; it's really true!

[AniaR]

Mer-wrangler Sean and I have been together for nearly 6 years, and I started my mer journey about 5 years ago officially. I sorta just started doing it, he wasn't that interested. when I got my merbellas tail though and he saw how happy I was, and we visited Florida and met other mers, that's when he decided he wanted to be on board and help! Before that it was just another one of those weird things I did lol.

[Mermaid Octavia]

I don't see how someone could find something negative about this. It's swimming, which is exercise, creativity is required to make the tails and all the accessories, children love mermaids... what's not to like? :)

[SeaGlass Siren]

They pin it as a negative thing like :you Want to be a mermaid? What are you a 7 year old?:

[malinghi]

Elena, that's great that you talked to him and he was cool with it. I was wondering about the fact you dated for a year without him knowing.

I'd imagine in that span of time some conversation would have lead to discussing it, like while talking about weird hobbies, or opinions on fantasy stuff, ect. Did none of that stuff ever come up in conversation, or did you actively avoid mentioning it? If you did there's nothing wrong with that, I'm just wondering.

[Mermaid Elena]

I didn't really avoid it but if we were ever discussing a relevant topic I just chose not to bring it up. He knew that I love mermaids, he just didn't know to what extent. I'm glad I waited because it hasn't affecting our relationship at all. He's totally supporting me with it and he's even going shopping with me for some materials this weekend.

[Azurin Luna]

They pin it as a negative thing like :you Want to be a mermaid? What are you a 7 year old?:

I just got a 80+ year old fan in my local swimming pool, she was totally happy about being with a mermaid

[SeaGlass Siren]

Im
referunv to the ones who think they're above everyone else lol..

[MermaidBrandie]

Why would you worry? I'm both a furry and intrested in mermaiding and both my boyfriends love it. :)

[spottedcatfish]

Im
referunv to the ones who think they're above everyone else lol..

Who are people you really don't want to be around anyways.

[Mermaid Varshana]

In fact, they're rather fun to offend just by you being happy :)

[MerMatt]

I don't see how someone could find something negative about this. It's swimming, which is exercise, creativity is required to make the tails...

Just my two cents, first my wife is super accepting of me as a merman. Second, since I have a disability swimming alone has allowed me to exercise and move muscles that usually are stiff, that's why I agree with Octavia. Also when I was practicing in the lane pool at my local pool in the weekend I mentioned to one of the lifeguards who found my monofin really cool that I was training to be a merman, and he found that super cool. I also agree with the statement made by Traveling Merman. Cheers!

[AniaR]

tell him with cake. lol

[Echidna]

Well, in the US mermaiding might not be mainstream, but it's still a lot more known and accepted than in Europe-
probably due to Weeki Wachi and all those shows.

Currently I'm living in a spot of Europe where anything fun is disregarded and sneered at-
be it a love for Fantasy, RPGs, cosplay, LARP (ok- lol), mermaiding, you name it-
never ever mention you do/like any of those.
You're a freak and will be treated as such!

Before I found the mernetwork, I was looking for something similar in my area.
I found one (and only one) site of clearly very young girls who were not only pretending to be real mermaids (yes, the real thing, breathing underwater), they were also giving out quite unwholesome and dangerous advice to the other, equally childish kids out there on how to become "like them".

Apart from that, there was one guy asking on yahoo whether there were any people near his town interested in meeting and swimming together, he had just purchased a tail.
The poor sod was pelted with dozens of so unfriendly, aggressive and derisive answers he probably threw his tail in the bin right away.
I felt really sorry for him :(

Mermaiding is really an underground movement here.
It won't stop me from going to swim in any public pool if I have to, and I simply ignore all the tards who are tripping over themselves literally rolling on the floor laughing at me, but not everyone is as carefree as I am in regards to, ahem, humankind.

[Mermaid Varshana]

Where do you live in Europe?

[Nate Walis]

Where do you live in Europe?

Judging from her comments and the type of bullshit she seems to have encountered, I'd be simply amazed if it was anywhere other than the UK.

[Mermaid Varshana]

It's amazing the distorted perception we Americans have of Europe. We think of that whole region there as some secular, worldly and progressive promised land. I've slowly gotten the feeling from statements here and there from natives that it's not....really that way.

[Nate Walis]

It's amazing the distorted perception we Americans have of Europe. We think of that whole region there as some secular, worldly and progressive promised land. I've slowly gotten the feeling from statements here and there from natives that it's not....really that way.

I think in all honesty the truth is somewhere in the middle, we have perhaps fewer religious and fascistic loonies with the ear of the powerful, but there are still remarkable examples of prejudice and closed-minded stupidity over here.

The reverse has proven for me to be true of the US, and I can honestly say that I've never met a Yank that I didn't actually like.

[Mermaid Varshana]

I hear stories, but I've never talked to someone from another country who was an asshole (with the exception of many natives from predominantly Islamic countries - the level of sociopathic misogyny is terrifying).

[mermaid_nixie]

When I told my boyfriend, he was totally excited! xD He thought it was the most amazing thing ever. So just kinda slowly start talking about swimming and tails and then say something! ^^ Even if he thinks it's weird, if he really loves you, he will accept it anyway :3

[Nate Walis]

I hear stories, but I've never talked to someone from another country who was an asshole (with the exception of many natives from predominantly Islamic countries - the level of sociopathic misogyny is terrifying).

As the great moral philosopher, Bronn of Westeros put it: "There's no cure for being a c*nt."

[Mermaid Pickles]

I've had one bf while being a mer, and he thought it was interesting. That's all I'm going to say, because he is not spoken of anymore. He was a complete jerk in the end. Though, my WHOLE work knows about the mer thing with me. Some of them don't really care, some are curious, and there are some who think it is cool. I had my friend bring my mermaidsrus tail to my work to drop it off so I could get it because I couldnt have it dropped off at my apartment while I wasn't there. My boss thought it was pretty cool, and I get to show the kids at work pictures of me in the tail when I have them. I work at a daycare, so that goes over well. I think a few of the parents know, but they don't think anything of it.

[Mermaid Octavia]

The reverse has proven for me to be true of the US, and I can honestly say that I've never met a Yank that I didn't actually like.

Aww that... makes me feel really good about myself, actually. Usually I'm embarrassed to be American. @_@

[Mermaid Varshana]

Every society on the planet has issues. Every. One.

[OrcaMatt]

tell him with cake. lolIce cream cake. Fudgie the Whale. Done.

[Nate Walis]

Aww that... makes me feel really good about myself, actually. Usually I'm embarrassed to be American. @_@

You really shouldn't be, because if a non-US citizen is really aware of the truth then they will judge on actions and not stereotypes. Personally I tend to think of what I call the "American Idiot" phenomenon as one that should be kept between Americans of different political and philosophical stripes, as it's mainly a case of the media tending to listen to the emptiest vessel that makes the most noise. Just remember all the sane and wonderful people that the US has given us, such as George Carlin, Penn & Teller as well as so many great writers such as Mark Twain and George R R Martin.

[Alveric]

My Father turned me on to Mark Twain when I was still in grade school (thanks Dad).

If I could write like Twain, I could die content and happy.

[Mermaid_Aurora]

I don't think I really thought about how to tell my boyfriend when I told him, I kinda just did. He already knew I wanted to be a conceptual model in the fantasy genre, so I suppose with that knowledge it wasn't much of a surprise. I just kinda started showing him pictures then decided "I want to do this!" and he ended up kinda being the first to know lol. He fully supports it, is helping me save for my first tail, and is even going to work with me in any way he possibly can once I am a mermaid. He thinks it's rather hot, actually. >.> But, he's also really huge into fantasy and all that so he was probably easier to tell that to than most. Even strangers and people I have been friends with for a very short amount of time were very accepting of it, some already knew about the whole mermaid thing and want to do it themselves! The only people I have issues with are a few of my family members. Though I have noticed people start getting really accepting and interested when you show them a lot of pictures and videos.

[LittleTreasure]

I haven't had any issues with my boyfriend knowing I like this stuff. I met him online, and so to curb any awkward conversations then and there, I had it on my profile that one of my hobbies was sewing, and I had made a mermaid tail that is swimmable. He learned as we dated more that I am kind of mermaid-obsessed. But that part of me isn't any weirder than my other quirks (like loving stuffed animals, dresses, and barbie dolls - yes, I'm kind of a huge kid). All he has really said to me about my love of mermaids is..."Well, at least your obsession is distinct!" Lol. And that he thinks I should make and sell them, probably because of some belief of his that everything must have a use, just guessing here.

[Ashe]

My boyfriend and I were talking and he asked me what I was doing. I said that I was working on a project (tail) and that he probably wouldn't understand. He said to tell me anyways so I did. He thinks that it is the coolest thing ever! I was really happy :)

[Seyani]

Hmm.. I did it this way:
Ease it in by talking about Free diving, mono fins, breath holding and swimming with sea life.... Then start about the mermaid tail ;3

Edit: Oh! That's great! My bf loved the idea too and he encourages me :D

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