Ages?

[Mermaid Ilari Mae]

How old do you say you are? (:

[Mermaid Jaffa]

50 in three years and proud of it!

[Miyu]

I'm 27, going on 28...

I'm at that point where I'm starting to doubt my self-worth based on my age :P Then I just look at all these amazing mers and see what those older than me have accomplished with a late start, and I'm suddenly inspired!

[Rivertee]

Lol I tell little kids in your years you would thik I'm 25 but in mer years, let's just say I could know your grandma.

[MermaidCelesteFL]

I'm as old as you see me to be.

[deepblue]

Hm. This is in the pro-mer section, and I'm not pro, but I have to say- I don't tell usually people my age (I just did here, but that was for a reason). Not because I care, but because I think it's funny when they guess anywhere from 28-35. I'm 44, but apparently, not what most people think of that. I think it's good for them to realize how little age matters, how little it applies, once you're an adult. Experience matters, wisdom can help, but age really does not mean much most of the time.

[AniaR]

I'm 28 for one more month. I turn 29 next month.

[Miyu]

Hm. This is in the pro-mer section, and I'm not pro, but I have to say- I don't tell usually people my age (I just did here, but that was for a reason). Not because I care, but because I think it's funny when they guess anywhere from 28-35. I'm 44, but apparently, not what most people think of that. I think it's good for them to realize how little age matters, how little it applies, once you're an adult. Experience matters, wisdom can help, but age really does not mean much most of the time.


This is precisely how I feel about it. When I was a young teenager, older teens would often guess I was older than I was. Since my early 20's, and to this day, people can't figure out how old I am. I've gotten guesses from 18-25. I got lucky with my family genetics though, the Italian side of my family ages SUPER well, people still think my mom and I are sisters! We're also short of stature and have large eyes, so that generally helps us look younger than we are :P

[Mermaid Lorelei]

Hmm. I never realized how young I was in the mermaid forum. I'm 22, though I've never had kids ask, or adults for that matter.

[MerEmma]

Fifteen years old! Earth Day's my birthday. :)

[Mermaid Galene]

I'm on Cloud 59 and enjoying the view!

[Miyu]

Wow Emma, that's a super cool birthday to have!

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Back in the day, I used to have a science teacher that would scold us with "Act your age and not your shoe size!"

We were mean kids and used to taunt him back with, "Act your age and not your bra size!" which we thought was very hilarious!

[Mermaid Fenicia]

on paper: 45

[Mermaid Syaira]

17

[Princess Pearl]

I'm 30. I love when kids ask me, because the response is often something along the lines of "but my Mom's thirty! She'd never do something like that!" or "But you're so cool!" And then they start guessing that I'm younger than I am. "I thought you were 20!" "Well, I thought you were 15!" "Yeah? Well I thought you were 12!"

[Mermaid Crystal Shimmer]

I'm 26 =)

[Merman Arion]

I'm 25 and I will be 26 four days after Merfest :)

[Merman Jamie]

ill be 27 on the first of november

[SummerRogue]

I'm 17 but i'll be 18 in december, people keep asking me whether I'm my little brothers mum:/

[shimmygoddess]

40. I tell people my real age. I usually shock them, bc they think I am younger ;)

[Kishiko]

I'm 14, but people usually guess around 16-18 because I'm mature for my age ;)

[Merman Dan]

I'll turn 49 next month (a square... how appropriate) but until I tell Facebook where I grew up, I don't have to. ;)

[Aquos Savar]

15

[mermaids-and-anchors]

19! (:

[Genevieve]

27

[PearlieMae]

So far, I am 712 moons. How else would a mermaid keep track of time?

[Merman Dan]

How else would a mermaid keep track of time?

Whale migrations, coral spawning, storm seasons, etc... never mind tracking the days with tides. :)

[PearlieMae]

Okay, smarty fins, all those are subject to location, but full moons are global/celestial events. :mermaid kiss:

[Mermaid Clara]

I'm 18 :)

[Merman Dan]

Okay, smarty fins, all those are subject to location, but full moons are global/celestial events. :mermaid kiss:


Fair enough! Just be glad we only have one moon. Keeping track of two can be... interesting. The moon affects the tides, at any rate, so we're both right. :)

[SINicallyTwisted]

38 here but I've never had anyone ask my age before at any event I've been at. I do look younger then I actually am which can be annoying when people assume that I am. I've had people think I was as young as a teenager outside of mermaiding!


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[CowgirlMermaid]

18 years old and I used to think that was old for a mermaid hobby, until I came across Mernetwork.

[Mermaid Blaire]

16! I feel very young compared to others here :) Gives me time to save up for my new tail, at least.

[Meronica]

I'm 20 but people tend to think I'm around 16... (and that I look like Ariel, haha)

[Mermaid Sirenia]

17 turning 18 in January :) most people think I'm older though haha


~Mermaid Sirenia~

[Mary Marine]

Just turned 25 last Friday!

While swimming yesterday I had two people ask my age with very different reactions. One little girl was blown away that I was a grown up and a mermaid. An old guy asked my age, said I looked younger, then asked me how many kids I have. Um, zero?

[Echidna]

So far, I am 712 moons. How else would a mermaid keep track of time?

:thumbs-up:

People usually say "omg, I thought you were a teenager!!" when my age comes up.
I look a whole deal older than I am if I'm having a migraine, though :p

Had a wtf moment once when I picked up the phone and some dude goes in a suddenly very childish dumb tone, "can I speak your mommy or daddy please?". Not appearance related, but c'mon.
My voice is perfectly normal lol.

[Mermaid Adriel]

I'm 22 but people think I'm younger xD

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[Mermaid Neri Elvina]

I'm almost 14, people think I'm older but I am mature for my age!!

[Mer-gal]

I am 14 but a lot of people usually think I am younger. According to PearlieMae I would be 168 moons.

[Mermaid Gracie Rose]

Almost 16!!!

[Lorelei]

I turned 21 last June. :) Although everyone says I still look like I'm 15 and restaurant servers tend to look at me funny when I show them my ID for a drink haha. :)

[Mermaid Sam]

It's good to know there are a bunch of teenaged mers here! I'm 15. The majority of my friends at school think I'm immature because I'm a mermaid but I've had loads of people think I am older than I really am.

[Aquos Savar]

Apparently, I'm 207 moons old...Now i feel old

[Mermaid Momo]

I'm 18 :)

[MerMatt]

28 here.

[Arella]

19 going on 20 :)

[Sherielle]

47 here. I always get surprise reactions when I tell my age because people think I'm younger.
I always say I can't be 47.....I still skip.

[Yulia]

I turned 20 a few weeks ago.
Ugh, I feel so old.

[PearlieMae]

I turned 20 a few weeks ago.
Ugh, I feel so old.

Hahaha! I have underwear older than you!

[deepblue]

I have a pair of boots and some items of clothing older than Yulia. :) High quality; it lasts.
But if you feel old at 20... you'll probably snap out of it at around 29 when you realize how young you really still are.

[AniaR]

shut up! Sin I'd have never guessed that. Aurelia I'd never have guessed that either! wow. we certainly are spread out. Not many 30 year olds we seem to skip the 30s. It's teens, a few in twenties, one person in 30s, and rest over 40. wow!

[MerMatt]

Mind you all of us twenty somethings will be in that 30s age group soon enough. Not that I want that.

[Sherielle]

Your 30's are the BEST years. For reals.

[PearlieMae]

Mind you all of us twenty somethings will be in that 30s age group soon enough. Not that I want that.

That is, until you are in your 30s and realize how silly your statement was ;)

[Sherielle]

We need to start a Mermaids of the Argent Scales group, for us mers over 40, lol

[Mermaid Freyja]

Mind you all of us twenty somethings will be in that 30s age group soon enough. Not that I want that.
^^

That is, until you are in your 30s and realize how silly your statement was ;)
HAha! Yep ;)


Your 30's are the BEST years. For reals.

Seriously! I completely agree; while I can't speak for everyone, I personally enjoy life SO much more now ;D
I'm in my mid 30s but thanks to never smoking, great genetics and not baking my skin in the sun or in tanning beds (but getting just enough sun), I still look like I'm much younger. People always guess my age to be in the 24 to 26 range.
I don't need to try and compete with people who are younger, but I'd say that I look better now than I did in my 20s!
Life in general is pretty sweet, too. Career wise and financially, I've reached that point where I can afford to do so much more, and a work/life balance I never had before.
And to top it all off, the learning experiences I had with friends and with significant others during my 20s, taught me a lot about how I contribute to relationships now.
It's hard to in today's world, but I tend to ignore the subtle and not-so-subtle age shaming, and age-obsessive culture we live in.
Even though I'm happy I am aging really well, I just enjoy life. So weather you are in your teens, your 70s or beyond, life is too short to worry about a number.
xoxox

[MarkF]

Thirties really? My memory of thirties was working 12 hour days to pay for keeping up with the Jones'z, private school for the kid and doing house repairs on the weekends. Thinking being an Executive was special, lasted in to forties.
Twenties, most forties good and all of the fifties. Moneys gone to large sailboats, sailing to islands, partying almost every other weekend, talking with Merfolk. Life isn't too bad.

[Vrindavana Starfish]

Your 30's are the BEST years. For reals.
^^ This. I'm 33. There is no amount of money anyone could pay me to go back to my 20's. 20's are not the best years of your life, they're the most confusing. The best is yet to come!

[Echidna]

As long as I can do what I want to physically, I won't worry about a number.

And while I'm not keen on wrinkles, grey hair and stuff, I must say I'm really looking forward to menopause.
No more headaches, migraines and crap twice a month.
I can't wait.

[Mermaid Freyja]

:) Everyone's experiences differ during whatever age group they are in, and there's a learning curve. But those experiences are also what *you* make them out to be.
In my 30s, I personally don't put 'keeping up with the Jones's' on my list of priorities. I learned this during my 20s; people are more important to me than material things. Those priorities for me are in the talented and genuinely good people I meet, and form lasting relationships with. Especially in the creative and performance/theater realm, it's made my life much happier and richer for it.
I don't know any Jones's that get to party at the "Gatsby mansion" Picnic one weekend, drive WWII tanks the next, and have dinner at the home of the man that created the Terminator, while the producer of Avatar passes me some butter for the mashed potatoes ;)
Yeah...my 30s are pretty darn awesome.

[Mermaid Galene]

In many ways, this is the best phase of my life. 60? Bring it on!

[AniaR]

I wasted my 20s doing a lot of stuff I felt forced to do. It wasn't until I broke free recently I started being happy. But I feel my 30s looming and I feel a crunch to do what I want. It's scary!

[Mermaid Amelia]

I'm 28 but feel a lot older since I had twins (is that a grey hair?!) I do kinda feel like I'm on the right path now and sometimes wish I found it earlier in life. That being said I did have some wild adventure and I'm happy I got to do all that too. You regret the things you didn't do much more than you regret what you did do ;) xx


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[Azurin Luna]

I'm 31, but people often guess me younger.

[Lucinda]

I wasted my 20s doing a lot of stuff I felt forced to do. It wasn't until I broke free recently I started being happy. But I feel my 30s looming and I feel a crunch to do what I want. It's scary!

You took the words right out of my mouth, Raina. I'm turning thirty myself next January. Gotta get out there and chase my dreams, which feels both exhilarating and daunting both at the same time.

[AniaR]

Nailed it Amelia. I also feel pressure to have kids the closer I get to 30. Mind you, I'd like to have a child but we have no clue when we'll be a bit more stable financially ( I currently support us both with just mermaiding) and I have a fertility illness. Not impossible to get pregnant... Just thanks to Canadian health it takes years to get help. I feel the biological clock ticking and I worry my window is smaller than others. That issue alone makes me think of my age daily

[Mermaid Amelia]

Oh no :( I know a few people in the same boat and it can cause a lot of stress. For myself and my husband kids were always something we wanted but were not expecting to get pregnant when we did - and then found out it was twins it was ALOT to take in. I had mixed emotions when I first got pregnant as my mermaiding and roller derby was really starting to kick off and I felt like I had to give up everything I enjoyed. Now I'm loving life and everything feels like it's starting to fall back into place. My sister (after being adamant she will never have kids) fell in love with her new nephews and is now going to start trying (she is 30). In someways I'm kinda glad now I had an unplanned pregnancy because it took the stress out of it. Like to deciding that you want to make a whole little person is a huge deal! Babies can be hard work and I'm now in awe of people who choose it! My mum always says that no one is ever really ready until it's happening, just trust in yourself. We weren't financially stable (and still aren't) but you just find a way to make things work. I hope if you and Sean do decide you want to try that it all goes smoothly as your obviously great with kids and would make a very cool mum xx


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[Mermaid Amelia]

I just want to add that having my boys is the best thing I have ever done. I have never had so much love in my life before. It's like little pieces of your own heart walking around on the outside. When you have kids you stop asking what life is all about/meaning of life stuff because you know. It's them, it's all about them.


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[Vrindavana Starfish]

I seriously admire those of you who have/want to have kids. I definitely do not, even though I really enjoy other people's children. I feel like I'm still trying to raise myself, and really just don't want that lifestyle. But it makes me admire those who do even more. That's a big, big job. I'll be the Aunt. :)

[Merman Dan]

Try seven kids, sometime... never a dull moment... or a clean house ;)

[Echidna]

I agree that raising children is something that changes your life and makes it something more, about them, not just about you.
However, I always knew I didn't want to inflate human populace even more by having kids by myself.
Seriously, overpopulation is completely insane, and still there are people who birth a handful of kids.

I guess the genetic instincts are very strong in some, but adoption is the way to go.
It really doesn't make a difference in the end: all humans are genetically related anyway. :p

[SINicallyTwisted]

shut up! Sin I'd have never guessed that.

Haha Yes Mer, I'm 38. A 38 yr old with a 17 yr old son (18 in Feb.) at that! Xp


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[Merman Dan]

I guess the genetic instincts are very strong in some, but adoption is the way to go.
Some of us choose both; I have three by birth and four by adoption. :)


It really doesn't make a difference in the end: all humans are genetically related anyway.
Hey, I saw Prometheus as well! ::ducks::

[shimmygoddess]

My husband felt exactly that way for a LONG time. I had my first son a month after I turned 18. I had always wanted to have more kids, but he didn't want to. It took 10 years to convince him and he would always say, the world was going downhill and why would I want to bring a child into it. Eventually he changed his mine and had my other two in 2002 and 2005 :)



However, I always knew I didn't want to inflate human populace even more by having kids by myself.
Seriously, overpopulation is completely insane, and still there are people who birth a handful of kids.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Rawr! Grey Army!

[Sherielle]

Rawr! Grey Army!Pod of the Silver Fin :cool:

[Mermaid Galene]

Ooh, Pod of the Silver Fin! I like it!

[Chrissy]

34 here birthday in November!!!! Speaking about kids I don't have any and for the longest time had no desire to have any until, this year. My husband and I went through something this year that made us both rethink what we wanted in life and we decided to start trying!!!

[Sherielle]

Ooh, Pod of the Silver Fin! I like it!
We should start it.

[Mermaid Galene]

I'm in! Silver Finners, unite!

[Merman Dan]

"You whippersnapper fish better get off my lawn!" ;)

[deepblue]

I just want to add that having my boys is the best thing I have ever done. I have never had so much love in my life before. It's like little pieces of your own heart walking around on the outside.

That's the way I describe motherhood, too! My daughter... my heart walking around on the outside. :) And it's not just love, it's this... all encompassing, soul-filling love, there is nothing I would not do for my child. Move mountains? No problem. Breaking past cycles of abuse so it is NEVER a part of her life? No problem. Mothering instinct takes precedent over all else. And since I had her at 39, I feel sooo lucky. I thought I'd be childless. (I know for some people it's child-free. For me it was childless.)


Pod of the Silver Fin :cool:

No thanks! :p I cannot imagine identifying as silver or grey until I'm in my 70s. At least. If even then! haha

At 44, the number means so little to me I still sometimes forget and almost say another number! Age can only define you if you want it to. I'd rather be ageless and timeless. Even when I am one day all silver haired and elderly in an awesome way.

[New York Mermaid]

I will be 33 (or 330 years young) October 29th

[Mermaid Neri Elvina]

I will be 33 (or 330 years young) October 29th
You have the same birthday as my Dad!! Lol! My birthday is October 28th I will be 14

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[Vrindavana Starfish]

(I know for some people it's child-free. For me it was childless.)


Thanks for making the distinction. :) For those of us who are child-free and happy, it's really hurtful when people describe us as "childless," as if we're missing something in our lives, because we're not. But we understand that it's different for other people, so it's really cool when people understand that sometimes it's childless, and sometimes it's child-free.

[MarkF]

I've had 3 friends now that have kids at 45. Two of which were first kids, the other thought she was off the hook because 15 years earlier her husband had a vasectomy. These thing heal with time apparently.
Hah, your not child free or child less yet.
Sometimes life just surprises you. :rainbow:

[SeaMansa]

I'll be 20 in a few weeks.... I am really not even excited for that at all >_>

[Vrindavana Starfish]

I've had 3 friends now that have kids at 45. Two of which were first kids, the other thought she was off the hook because 15 years earlier her husband had a vasectomy. These thing heal with time apparently.
Hah, your not child free or child less yet.
Sometimes life just surprises you. :rainbow:

Life may surprise me, but I am in fact child-free. I've made a conscious, well-thought through decision to be. If something surprises me later, then that's later, but I am definitely child free until or IF that ever happens. :)

[Mermaid Galene]

I am without human children, but I have never considered myself child-free. I have shared a deep and abiding love with my furkids and finkids over the years, and that bond satisfies my nurturing instinct. In my nearly 3 decades as an entertainer, I have also enjoyed working with hundreds of children, and that has been satisfying, too.

[MarkF]

I'm not promoting guppies, just the tone of the comments are so adamant and your lives not over till the end of time. Till then don't close you heart to dreams whether gaining friends, family "fuzzy or slip on scaly.
I believe in serendipities and there always room for more.

[Mermaid Momo]

I'm still young, but I know I want kids (3 to be exact, it's sort of a tradition in our family that everyone has 3. though it started by accident haha. My parents just say that when you have 3 they organize themselves lol. If 2 are fighting, there's one to either cheer it on or stop it haha) I want to have the last one in my late 20's because one thing I learned from my parent's having us 3 so young is that they were able to do so many things with us because they weren't limited by things caused by age like not being able to chase us around, or pick us up, or rough house with us. And now, my dad is 40 and mom 39 and they only have 1 kid left at home who moves out next year, they're enjoying their time without kids, we're old enough now that they can leave us at home and enjoy themselves and start planning their retirements (sadly that also means that my mom keeps bothering me about kids too because she's going through empty nest haha)

[Mermaid Jaffa]

I'm child free but that's because I chose to be. I just don't have the patience for kids. I'm fine with kids that you can GIVE back!

[deepblue]

So why is it that so many people are seeing themselves as Old because they're over 30? Or 40? Ore even 50?

This stuff is entirely subjective.

[Echidna]

I am without human children, but I have never considered myself child-free. I have shared a deep and abiding love with my furkids and finkids over the years

:thumbs up:
wonderfully said!
It's a great (if not the best) way to share love and caring without hurting the planet even more.

Not to mention fur- and finkids are usually much better behaved than even the sweetest human child ever, and they don't grow up to tell you they hate you, do drugs, hang out with evil people, and all that jazz.

What I've seen of other people's kids over the years was quite enough, I don't need any of my own, tyvm :p

[New York Mermaid]

You have the same birthday as my Dad!! Lol! My birthday is October 28th I will be 14
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Awesome!!, I also share my birthday with one of my favorite actors Richard Dryfuss, who played Hooper in JAWS. I always hold the Belief that you are only as old as you act/feel, I feel like im in my late teens/early 20s.


As for children I just tell everyone," Its not in the cards for us, we are happy where we are, maybe in the future".
When the truth is: Im able to conceive but not hold to term. My first and only pregnancy turned into a difficult miscarriage that I ended up in hospital for 2 weeks, I was told by the doc in order for me to have a full term pregnancy would involve a surgery prior to getting pregnant and once there it'll be7 MONTHS of bed rest (Yea No not happening ever!). So the only Kids I have are two amazing Quaker parrots which the oldest will be 10 years old October 30th.

Im actually quite okay with no kids, maybe one day we will adopt, my husband and I are not in a place to raise children, we want to enjoy our lives together before making a step forward in into parenthood.

[-Annwyn-]

31....and right now feeling like 86 because I recently picked up my fencing lessons again after 5 years and my body hates me, Lol! :cry::cool:

[MarkF]

So why is it that so many people are seeing themselves as Old because they're over 30? Or 40? Ore even 50?
This stuff is entirely subjective.

It's weird, you don't see it. Just imagine yourself and one day someone says to you "you can't do that, your old." Your still you, you still enjoy and do your stuff. You look out at the crowd through your eyes and see everything to you seems the same as far as your concerned it is, but people try to remind you your old "Your like huh, what."
You can't get jobs past 50. When you go into a store look around at the people working there, no old people. Walk into a office, same thing.
They live in my world, I was here first and in my world I still do stuff.
Sometime it's like your watching Logan's Run. :gah:

[Vrindavana Starfish]

I'm not promoting guppies, just the tone of the comments are so adamant and your lives not over till the end of time. Till then don't close you heart to dreams whether gaining friends, family "fuzzy or slip on scaly.
I believe in serendipities and there always room for more.

I think I get what you mean, but the problem is, when those of us say we don't want kids, and are adamant about it (we can be, we have that right until something else happens), then people say "just you wait" or "don't close yourself to love," as if having children is the only way to experience deep, true love and joy in your life, or as if we're just immature and eventually we'll succumb to our biological clocks. Yet, no one ever questions someone who says that they want kids. It's a double standard, it's incredibly judgmental, and very insulting when people (I'm talking people in general, as a whole, and not you specifically) assume that your life is loveless and meaningless when you don't want kids. It's like the first thought people have is that you're damaged somehow, or stupid.

I, for one, really love kids. I taught them for years. They're awesome. But thinking kids are cool is not enough of a requirement to becoming a parent. Even those who were surprised with children gained the desire somehow to WANT to keep them and raise them. The fact that I've recognized that I do not want kids does not make me damaged, it means I have a deep understanding of exactly who I am and what I want. As far as "surprise! you're pregnant!" then there's always adoption, because other parents-to-be desperately want kids, and I do not.

I have a deep, loving relationship with my husband, and a few very close friends, and I love animals. My life is very far from empty, and people always seem to leave out the "you never know" bit when it comes to "Hey, I thought I wanted kids, and now that they're here, I feel like my life is ruined, it's their fault, and I'm going to take it out on them." That is a very, very real scenario that happens all the time and people find it inconvenient, because it's not socially acceptable to not want kids, so this aspect is ignored. Whether they're a surprise or not, children should be WANTED, and if you can't do that, then you have no business having kids. It doesn't mean your life is missing something, except regret. Some people do regret having kids, it isn't nice to talk about, but it's true.

Also, you're right about the age thing. I see it all the time, especially with work. I look much younger than I am, and when I started this job, I made the 50-something woman there very nervous. She didn't calm down until she learned how old I actually was, and I don't blame her. Everyone else in the office is young and tech-savvie, and she felt she would be seen as outdated and in need of replacing. This is one of the reasons I want to be in business for myself, because I don't want to face that in the future.

[Echidna]

^^
:clap:

couldn't have said it better.
People always are condescending when you are sure you don't want kids, because themselves they are so driven by hormones or whatever, they cannot conceive making such a decision.
They'll go "you will change your mind", "you'll meet just the right man and then you will want kids", etcetc, as if I was some jungle monkey driven by basic instincs and unable to do anything out of my own free will.

On the other hand, having kids all for the wrong reasons (and you wouldn't believe what kind of reasons some have kids for- being the center of attention, having larger breasts for a while, trying to hold a guy, wanting something "all of my own to myself"...) almost always ends in a trainwreck, yet those people are never criticized or treated condescendingly.

And it's really sad to grow up and find one or both of your parents regret having you.
I'd never wish that on anyone.
It's better, and just as fulfilling and satisfying, to adopt a child, human or nonhuman.

[Mermaid Cascada]

I'm 15 and I'll be turning 16 on the 23rd of this month... It's weird, even though I consider myself young, I really don't want to get any older. I don't know why either :p

Perhaps maybe you guys are looking at it the wrong way...


I honestly don't think they're trying to be condescending (although some rude people may, you never really know); however, it's stereotypical I think everyone who tells you you'll want kids, is. They start a family as an extension of their love, and having children bring some people such happiness and joy, that they cannot conceive why someone else would not want to have children, and hey, we all have our reasons. But not having children doesn't mean your missing out on that happiness and joy and it doesn't mean the love is not there, maybe it comes from another source.

Kinda like how some of us don't quite understand why others don't like mermaiding/mermaning (it's so fun!), but it's not for everyone :p It's most likely not because they look at you or think that you can't make your own desicions, or are driven by some weird animalistic instinct... They had children because of their love not because of some instinct, so why would they believe you'd have an instinct? (Some people may, but again, not everyone). It's just what they know to have happened to them, some may feel that of course it'll happen to someone else, but we are all different and I think they understand that.

Also, Echidna, I agree with you that having children for the wrong reasons is bad, but I wouldn't say they are not criticized or not treated condescendingly. Also (human) adoption is not for everyone and is not nessecarily better. It is just as satisfying and fulfilling if you WANT to adopt children for the right reasons. If you want to have your baby, go right ahead. And this is coming from someone who was adopted lol. Adoption is great though, don't get me wrong and I encourage it :)

I think it'd be cool to make a thread about adoption/ adopted mers :) I'd love to hear others stories about adopting or being an adoptee.

Edit: Sorry for such a long post :p

[Mermaid Galene]

Exactly, Vrindavana.

I don't think we're disagreeing with you, Mark, about there always being time for dreams and unforeseen life changes. None of us here have closed our hearts to dreams. It's just that for some of us, our dreams don't include having children. (And BTW, I'm 10 years past menopause, so I'm pretty sure serendipity ain't gonna make me pregnant!)

[MarkF]

Echidna, Galene my own father months before he died told me he hated my brothers and I. Said my Mom stopped being fun after that. I too have friends that were pushed over the edge when kids appeared. I think maybe many factors at that time in couples marriages. Buying first homes, car payments, debts all play a part. So no I'm not challenging your decision. Thats why I prefaced my comment with I'm not advocating guppies. It was more of a life statement recommending shinier things on the swim to somewhere else.

[Vrindavana Starfish]

:group hug:

[MarkF]

Thanks Vrindavana.

So would senior Mermaids have scales falling off or is it a metamorphosis thing?
Latent gene it's only every 3rd generation that metamorphosed into a mermaid.
They never found a mermaid body, maybe mermaids don't grow old. Kinda like the lost boys.

From Mermaid ages, children issues to life perspectives. I saw that Alien Mermaids idea, Hum? Mermaids from space, Mermaids from Mars, Invasion of the Mermaids from space. Theres got to be a picture in there somewhere.

I am so drifting, must have been the 5k walk for breast cancer. Way to much estrogen and pink!

[MarkF]

Perhaps there's a fear that if I stop playing I will be old. Just sitting in my recliner with the doulies on the arms and drinking whatever and my prescription drug bottles on my side table, a copy of TV guide on my lap as I sleep. - N o t!

I'm going to the pool, then maybe go into the garage and work some more on the Long tail extension. See given the choice there is no choice- See ya after the pool.

[Mermaid Galene]

recommending shinier things on the swim to somewhere else.

Absolutely! Life has an unlimited potential for shininess. :thumbs up:

[Mermaid Leira]

I'm 28, 29 on oct 29th, same bday as New York mermaid :) but age is just a number I'm not dreading my 30's at all, why restrict what you do because of where you think should be in life using periods split up by labeled decades I figure :)

[Merman Dan]

Absolutely! Life has an unlimited potential for shininess.

Not to interrupt the snark of the childless...err... "child free", but I find my life is far shinier because of my children. :)

It truly is a different mindset; neither side can fully empathize with the other. Neither side is right. Neither side is wrong.

I see my best friend and his bothers and sisters. None have children. The bloodline ends with them. Immortality has been lost. I just don't get it. Then I see particular mannerisms in my children, echoes of my own imagination flavored with their own unique additions, and I smile.

[Mermaid Galene]

True love is a wonderful thing. 'Nuf said.

[Merman Dan]

True love is a wonderful thing. 'Nuf said.

Truth.

[Vrindavana Starfish]

If mermaids are of the faerie world, and according to Irish folklore, that's most likely, then they would not appear to age to us. A hundred of our years would be a few days to them.

[Sherielle]

I would think the older the mermaid, the more powerful.

[Aziara]

I'm 27, 28 in two months. I still get carded... every... single....time. And I'll likely never be in the silver fin pod--as cool as I think a full head of silver hair is, my mother at 57 has only a couple grays. So I don't think gray hair is in the cards for me unless I bleach and then dye my hair silver, lol!

As for the kids vs no kids argument, every person is going to be different. For me, I'm 4 1/2 months pregnant and still a little terrified of being a parent, though I'm excited as well. I really can't imagine going through this much agony a second time though--although as an only child, I always said I wanted a few kids so that they wouldn't be lonely like I was.... *shrug*

[Sherielle]

I totally dye my hair. I'm not ready for my hair to 'sparkle' yet. But I would still be in the Pod of the Silver Fin. I don't think having silver hair would be a requirement.

[Mermaid Galene]

Right, Aurelia. I think the "silver" thing is just metaphorical. My hair is red and blue!

[Mermaid Isabel]

18 :P

[New York Mermaid]

I'm 28, 29 on oct 29th, same bday as New York mermaid :) but age is just a number I'm not dreading my 30's at all, why restrict what you do because of where you think should be in life using periods split up by labeled decades I figure :)

Oh yay another mermaid celebrates the same birthday as me :D, exactly age is a number, as long as you're having fun and happy that's all that matters.

[deepblue]

Sometime it's like your watching Logan's Run. :gah:

I just have to give kudos for the reference. :)

You're right about age discrimination in the workplace, though- although you will find younger people saying they're the ones being discriminated against, it's overwhelmingly a problem for people over 50. I was in HR, I've seen it myself, and I've seen my mom go through it. It's no wonder people lie about their age.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

I've had white streaks since I was a twelve. When I was younger, I'd pull them out, only to have them grow back in the same follicles, not black but white hairs so they are not actually grey hairs.

I don't miss the things about not having kids. I've had friends who are no longer friends, who say things like, "God wants you to have kids. That will make your family happy too." My reply was, "If He wanted me to have kids, He should've given me a maternal instinct as I don't have one." Or something stupid like, "I have children so that my family loves me more".

[Vrindavana Starfish]

I have a blond/silver streak at my temple that I've had since birth. Any silvers I have coming in just kind of blend. My baby sister just bleached her raven hair silver, and she looks like a frost princess-- beautiful!

[Echidna]

I have a blond/silver streak at my temple that I've had since birth. Any silvers I have coming in just kind of blend. My baby sister just bleached her raven hair silver, and she looks like a frost princess-- beautiful!

aha!
there are at least half a dozen fantasy franchises which have a silver streak as a sign of royal birth/great power/awesomeness ;)

and complete silvery or white hair does indeed look awesome on a young or ageless person.
That's why so many fantasy elves/fairies etc look great with it.

I plan on keeping my hair as long and uncut as it's now and see how it looks once it's completely white.
I fear it's not quite as appealing though if it's accompanied by an old granny face :(

[MarkF]

You could do grey hair with a dark streak.

[Vrindavana Starfish]

My mom has the prettiest color silver hair, now that we've convinced her to stop dyeing it. I have her coloring, and honestly can't wait for it all to go silver.

[deepblue]

I have a few friends who have these great silver streaks, so well placed you'd think it was planned by them. They let them grow in and it looks so good. My gray comes in just at the the sides of my face. I've tried letting it grow in like that, and you know... I got tired of people asking if I was tired. It seems that for me, gray hair there means I'm tired. lol Same with my naturally dark circles (had them my entire life, no matter how healthy or not, no matter how fit or not), and if I don't wear concealer, I get asked if I am tired. It's really annoying.

People should not ask others if they're tired unless they know they've been awake for days. lol

[Vrindavana Starfish]

That would be annoying. It's like having Resting B*tch Face, and people ask if you're mad or annoyed. No, I'm perfectly happy, this is just my face, thanks.

[Sandra Siren]

Lol, my husband has really dark hair and keeps telling me he wants to have all white hair. I tell him if he wants to just try it out I'd dye it for him, but he won't let me. So I think this Halloween I'll get that white spray, or gel and let him see if he likes it.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

I had my hair professionally dyed last weekend... All because my family kept going on and on about how nobody wants to hire a raggedy looking grey haired old lady. Their words were, "Oh. Looking much better. You chose a nice color, now you don't look so old. And hopefully someone will hire you now."

What century are these people living in??

I miss my white streaks...

I'm also hoping that this darkest of browns will somehow get bleached by the chlorine in the swimming pool and goes a funky red or green color. Like a mermaid... Hehehe!

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Lol, my husband has really dark hair and keeps telling me he wants to have all white hair. I tell him if he wants to just try it out I'd dye it for him, but he won't let me. So I think this Halloween I'll get that white spray, or gel and let him see if he likes it.

Wait till he falls asleep, then find one spot on his head and just spray that spot! Then see how he likes his new circle of white!

[-Annwyn-]

There is a freedom in being in my 30s that beats anything from my 20s ever! Could be the added life experience, but I also think in my 20s I was under a lot of societal pressure to behave just so.

[Sandra Siren]

Wait till he falls asleep, then find one spot on his head and just spray that spot! Then see how he likes his new circle of white!

Lol!! I so should! If I can find a decent spray, I'll post pictures next weekend :p

[Selkie Auda]

I am 25

[Tetra]

Wow I feel like a baby lol. I'm not professional but I turn 21 in March.

[deepblue]

Ever catch a look at yourself in the mirror after days of little to no sleep? I think I've aged more this last year than in so many prior. And I might be starting to 'look my age' which I'd be okay with if I didn't look so damn tired.

[BayouMermaid]

Real life, 24. Sometimes I tell kids that I'm 240. Just depends on the day :)

[Echidna]

Being tired does terrible things.
If I had too little sleep, I look like my own grandmother, literally :p

[Mermaid Jaffa]

I feel great! Its like a living my childhood again, except this time without the epileptic fits and being watched 24/7 because of said fits. It feels free to be able to do what I want, when I want, and enjoying a great exercise and relaxation in my mermaid tails.

[Mermaid Gipsy]

I'm 17, currently, going on 18, but I tell kids I'm 403 in mermaid years. Just an arbitrary number I picked that think sounded nice! :lol:



People always are condescending when you are sure you don't want kids, because themselves they are so driven by hormones or whatever, they cannot conceive making such a decision.
They'll go "you will change your mind", "you'll meet just the right man and then you will want kids", etcetc, as if I was some jungle monkey driven by basic instincs and unable to do anything out of my own free will.

On the other hand, having kids all for the wrong reasons (and you wouldn't believe what kind of reasons some have kids for- being the center of attention, having larger breasts for a while, trying to hold a guy, wanting something "all of my own to myself"...) almost always ends in a trainwreck, yet those people are never criticized or treated condescendingly.


I hate those relatives who INSIST you'll "change your mind". I often get "Oh, but you're sooo young. You'll change your mind when you're older!". There are so many personal reasons I don't want children that I won't disclose, but the bottom line is: No. I don't fucking want children. Stop insisting I will when I'm older. The thing is, I love kids (not fond of babies because I have a phobia that they'll poop/puke/get other bodily fluid on me), and love entertaining kids as a mer or other fantasy character, but there is no way in hell I'd want any full time.

Motherhood changes so much about a woman, not just her body. Almost every little detail of your life changes- permanently, especially the way you think. A baby isn't something just to have out of "obligation"; it's a living human being, that changes your life in every way, and relies on you in every phase of its own life. It's not a pet, you don't just feed, cuddle, and clean up after it. As selfish as it may sound written out, I'm not willing to give up or sacrifice my dreams and lifeplans to bring another human being into an already overpopulated world for ANY reason. Motherhood is a full, lifelong commitment, and not something I want.

[Sherielle]

I have a child. I love him dearly. Now other kids? I like to entertain them while in character, but I don't want to have them with me 24/7. I was never a kid person. I'm not the neighborhood mom. I didn't mesh well AT ALL with the other mom's in my son's cub scout pack. I totally understand not wanting kids.

[Rivertee]

23 years of saying no way in hell am I having children, but now that I am a mother I wouldn't change it for the world. I have a little boy that is amazing and other people often tell me he's mature for his age (though he's only 2) lol. But I've seen some parents out there that should've stuck to the "no kids" thinking. You're right that motherhood isn't for everyone and it does change ypu life, however not once have I given up my dreams or goals because of him. If anything now I have my personal cheering motivator to keep me on track. Kids can be cruel, but I'm hoping I can teach my son not to be and to respect the little magic people like us bring into this world.