B!TC# IT OUT!

Just as Raina said, for many of us, it took a LONG time to get us to where we are now. I made my first fabric tail in 2009. I didn't get my dream silicone tail until 2015. It's been a super long, and sometimes painful journey to get there, but it's worth it in the end. For my Mermaid Creations tail, it was close to a year of saving, and for this one, it was about 6 months straight of working overtime EVERYDAY, skipping meals(don't do that, folks), not buying things, rooming with a lot of people to cut down on rent, skipping cons and get-togethers with my friends, and only buying the essentials.

Let's not even get started on how long it took Pearlie to get there...

Also, as others have said, silicone tails are SUPER heavy outside of the water. My Mermaid Creations tail was about 30 lbs with a Foil monofin, and I thought that was big until I recently got my new tail with a competitor monofin that is close to 7 lbs heavier, adds three feet on to me, and WAY more difficult to lift with my legs outside of water. And I still need neoprene stocks for it to fit right on my feet. Ugh, I gotta work out more.

Trust me, while fabric tails may not be the most realistic-looking tails you're searching for, it's all what you make of it. For the people who have never seen a silicone tail, you'd still be the most fantastic thing they've ever seen. You can still get library and charity gigs in fabric tails. You can still do mermaid meet ups in fabric tails. And I guarantee you, nobody on this forum should treat you any differently. I know I won't. :)

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Originally Posted by Sabrina the Selkie

Also, I just found out thay mosquitoes love type O blood. I've always known that I got bit to all hell when my friends don't, but really!

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this explains a lot


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What Celeste said!
And right, Labyrinth?! Ugh. Ten mosiquito bites from this past weekend alone. It's not even summer yet!

Where I work we have a mosquito problem, and I come home every day with multiple bites. It sucks.


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lavenders. spray and cover yourself in lavender.

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Originally Posted by SeaGlass Siren

lavenders. spray and cover yourself in lavender.

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I wish it were that easy, but I work at a zoo and only a few animals can handle smells. listerine was once a bug spray company, so that totally works too, but everything is either toxic or smells, so I just have to deal with it


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That really sucks.
I however, will try the lavender. And Listerine. And vinegar helps too.

Thanks for those kind words concerning the post I made about silicone tails! I actually just finished my own spandex tail, and it is awesome. I'm proud and I know that I'm just gaining more and more experience for when I get my dream tail!

For those of you with mosquito problems, I spent 2 months in India and didn't get a single bite. I rubbed coconut oil on my skin as a lotion every day. They wouldn't even come close to me. No joke, I'd walk right into a cloud of them by the water fountain and they'd all disappear.

Mosquitoes don't like me either way. I guess I don't taste good? Also, ont he idea of the coconut oil, might oughtta tell my sister that one. Even with bugspray she gets eaten like crazy by the little monsters.

I'll have to try that, thanks!


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Oh, I might try that too. I used to have little problems with the bites, but lately I get huge bumps, like I got allergic to them :( I once had to go to the doctor to get some medicine for it, cause my eye was swollen shut by a few bites of them on my face.

My little rant... I'm working at a shipyard were we make new ships. But due to the lower oil prices and stuff we aren't getting a lot of orders to keep everybody working. So they have started to reorganize, or are planning too, but all we heard were rumours. The work environment is suffering from this, and more people get grumpy to work. Then we see a news paper article that about 1400 people are going to be fired, they are all temporary people who have been working for some projects here. All the company had to say was, they are our expansion and deflation shell, and because we are low on orders we have to let them go. The odd thing is that the rumours going around said that people above a certain age were going to be fired as well, if they did that, they would throw away all the knowledge we have. It would be easier to save the money from the new systems they wanted to use, which is stagnating in their testing, and find a different way then just kicking people with knowledge out, even if they are just temporary people.
Our trade union is demanding answers and a different approach, but still, it feels weird knowing that people will get fired or put in different locations just because we aren't getting enough orders.

I don't get this.

I've been wanting to try Taekwondo for ages, and recently I've been looking into classes around the area. I want to use it for fitness, and to supplement my fencing in terms of agility and stamina.
So my partner has been silently unapproving of my wanting to do Taekwondo. He doesn't want to know about it, won't support it or encourage it and doesn't want to talk to me about it.


Today, he sees a post on Facebook by a mutual friend who does bellydancing, for a bellydancing workshop.


"Oh! You should do it! Go on!!" he exclaims excitedly.

Can anyone look at this scenario and tell me why he would be doing this? I don't like bellydancing (it doesn't interest me). It's irritating and confusing and ultimately I'm being held back because I then don't feel confident making a decision (stupid, I know).

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Originally Posted by -Annwyn-

I don't get this.

I've been wanting to try Taekwondo for ages, and recently I've been looking into classes around the area. I want to use it for fitness, and to supplement my fencing in terms of agility and stamina.
So my partner has been silently unapproving of my wanting to do Taekwondo. He doesn't want to know about it, won't support it or encourage it and doesn't want to talk to me about it.


Today, he sees a post on Facebook by a mutual friend who does bellydancing, for a bellydancing workshop.


"Oh! You should do it! Go on!!" he exclaims excitedly.

Can anyone look at this scenario and tell me why he would be doing this? I don't like bellydancing (it doesn't interest me). It's irritating and confusing and ultimately I'm being held back because I then don't feel confident making a decision (stupid, I know).

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Because boys are weird? From the looks of it, and I swear I mean no disrespect to you or your boyfriend. I don't know him personally but this is just an observation of the behavior he has displayed in the text you provided. He seems to... fear... maybe? That by taking something like Taekwondo, he may feel emasculated maybe? He may want to retain this sense of being the physically strong one, a common attitude in males in relationships. They need to be the physically superior one, as they feel that being physically stronger makes them feel needed. A Self defense class like this may make him feel less needed or valued as a protector.

In that sense he would encourage you to undertake an activity that perhaps makes you more sexual? (I don't know but I suppose conventionally people see belly dancing as something at least minorly sexually provocative, intended or not, especially those who are ignorant as to the inner workings, like myself) If he supports your mermaiding then one could assume that this means he prefers his partner to do activities that are, at least some what provocative. This may also connect to the above statement, the more sexually you are portrayed, the more he will feel the need to protect you from others, specifically rival males.

Again I promise I mean no offence I'm just stating how it looks to me personally and I could be totally wrong. I don't know how guys think specifically, and I will readily admit that my views are probably incredibly sexist.

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Originally Posted by Mer-Crazy

Because boys are weird? From the looks of it, and I swear I mean no disrespect to you or your boyfriend. I don't know him personally but this is just an observation of the behavior he has displayed in the text you provided. He seems to... fear... maybe? That by taking something like Taekwondo, he may feel emasculated maybe? He may want to retain this sense of being the physically strong one, a common attitude in males in relationships. They need to be the physically superior one, as they feel that being physically stronger makes them feel needed. A Self defense class like this may make him feel less needed or valued as a protector.

In that sense he would encourage you to undertake an activity that perhaps makes you more sexual? (I don't know but I suppose conventionally people see belly dancing as something at least minorly sexually provocative, intended or not, especially those who are ignorant as to the inner workings, like myself) If he supports your mermaiding then one could assume that this means he prefers his partner to do activities that are, at least some what provocative. This may also connect to the above statement, the more sexually you are portrayed, the more he will feel the need to protect you from others, specifically rival males.

Again I promise I mean no offence I'm just stating how it looks to me personally and I could be totally wrong. I don't know how guys think specifically, and I will readily admit that my views are probably incredibly sexist.

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No offence taken at all - I actually think you've hit the nail right on the head there.

That was the vibe I was getting as well. That, and because Bellydancing is predominately a female-based activity (like mermaiding) I'm more likely to be surrounded by women than men. Fencing just seems to be neutral territory. He's fine with fencing because he's a 4th Dan in Kendo so were both swordspeople.

But that's the thing, the whole "You're no longer in a submissive position in the relationship" bugging him does strike a chord with me because he's a classic gentleman on the street (walking on the outside of the footpath, taking an isle seat on the train, for example). I really want to try TKD because I'm strong in the legs and it would build my confidence and self-esteem, not to mention the socialising aspect. Ah, how tender is the alpha-male ego, hmm? lol smh

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Originally Posted by -Annwyn-

No offence taken at all - I actually think you've hit the nail right on the head there.

That was the vibe I was getting as well. That, and because Bellydancing is predominately a female-based activity (like mermaiding) I'm more likely to be surrounded by women than men. Fencing just seems to be neutral territory. He's fine with fencing because he's a 4th Dan in Kendo so were both swordspeople.

But that's the thing, the whole "You're no longer in a submissive position in the relationship" bugging him does strike a chord with me because he's a classic gentleman on the street (walking on the outside of the footpath, taking an isle seat on the train, for example). I really want to try TKD because I'm strong in the legs and it would build my confidence and self-esteem, not to mention the socialising aspect. Ah, how tender is the alpha-male ego, hmm? lol smh

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Ahh, I didn't think of the whole male vs female dominated sport thing. That could have a lot to do with it as well :)

Oh Janey......I've just done a google image search for "Jealous boyfriends be like " and I'm balling!!!!

Thing is, I rave about him and telling him I'm crazy about him every day. One would think I'M the overly protective girlfriend. And he's responsive, but on a waayyy more subdued level than I am.

http://matadornetwork.com/abroad/10-...iend-japanese/ (No.6 and 7...totally him) :|

Tell him Tae Keon do is a male and female sport. Generally all martial arts are for both genders (many girls do take it as much as males predominantly in Asia. Highly encouraged as it is Good for discipline. We got that yin and yang thing going on.)
but in a patriarchal society they like to keep it strictly male which is complete and utter bullshite.

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Originally Posted by SeaGlass Siren

Tell him Tae Keon do is a male and female sport. Generally all martial arts are for both genders (many girls do take it as much as males predominantly in Asia. Highly encouraged as it is Good for discipline. We got that yin and yang thing going on.)
but in a patriarchal society they like to keep it strictly male which is complete and utter bullshite.

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Yeah, we both knew it's a male a female sport and we both already undertake other forms of disciplined sports. He knows all this, he knows all this, he knows all this. I think Mer-crazy had the right idea. The idea of my learning self-defense might make him think he's being made redundant, which is just all in his head.

So if he knows, then in theory he should be ok with it. In practice I don't know why he isn't ok with you taking it.
Sorry I have :bitch mode: turned on today as I have very little tolerance for assholes/ assholish behavior. If he normally isn't an asshole forgive me for thinking otherwise. But this .. Me no likey.