What's with the Silence?

[AniaR]

I work professionally with people who have autism. But since you did not publicly identify yourself I did not feel it was my place to point out what I thought were signs of it from you.

Please stop obsessing over me on the forum. It makes me extremely uncomfortable that you've named me in the subjects of several posts.

If you have autisim than my attempts at being black and white should be appreciated. So I will make this as clear as possible one more time:

1. People have answered you more than once many times. On our forum you must stop reposting threads, check to see if a topic is covered before asking a question, and not get upset with people if they can't answer you.

2. In your other thread we listed all the reasons why people don't reply to threads. Please read it.

3. In future if you take personal issue with something someone says, you report the post. Call out threads get people suspended.

If you want people to reply on here please do the following:
1. Accept the answers that are given
2. Don't repost a thread multiple times
3. Respect the boundaries of others
4. Don't ask the same questions over and over when you've been given an answer.
5. Please read the stickied threads for topics you're interested in or search the forum using the search function.
6. Please stop cluttering up the forum with call out threads getting angry you aren't getting the answers you want. This is the 3rd one in 6 hours.

On a personal note stop saying you feel sorry for me. You are accusing us of being hurtful because we don't answer things the way you want. Buy you have been making so many accusations.


You should talk to some of the other mers who have autism to help you learn how to self regulate on the forum. They know what it feels like to be excited and have a hard time with the social queues . they can help you.

I take accountability for myself if I am being mean on the forum. But I have done nothing but answer your questions multiple times. Stop referencing me like this in threads. I have a right to turn off my PM s ( which I have done many times before you were a member) without being subjected to 3 call out threads. I and others have been more than kind and accommodating and I feel you are taking advantage of that.

[Merfin_Aurora_Oceania]

I think the way you construct your words things can come across as being harsh in my opinion, take a look in the mirror Raina, would you treat yourself the way you treat me?

I am taking a stance for myself because I am not people's doormats, I have experienced 16 years of bullying so I am extremely sensitive and I can feel when you are personally attacking me.

Your energy, your words whether written or spoken are like psychic attacks Raina, they are like daggers being stabbed into my body. Do I not have a right to speak up how I feel? You are hurting me.

Its not just yourself Raina, I'm saying to other's also.

Despite yourself being influential on the forum, even the people whom do not have much as influential power such as myself I want to take a stance for myself. Even those that are afraid to speak up, I speak up for them too because its not an experience I ought to go through and at least I know I have a voice in which to use and I am not afraid of who I am.

I don't need to follow someone to be powerful. I am powerful in myself and I can be my own leader.

Why should I be treated any less and I don't need to justify myself or who I am in order to be understood?

I can not help to feel sorry for you as you are so quick to jump to conclusions. Every person is unique regardless, I ought not be here right now justifying myself to anyone.

We ought to embrace each other for who we are.

I see the light within myself for who I am.

Why are people so quick to quell my light just because they don't understand?

If you were to know of my personal circumstances what it shift the way you feel? How can you be so quick to judge me, you don't know me.

How would you feel Raina if you were to walk in my shoes and I walk in your shoes?

Just like you, we have all walked on our own individual journeys, we all cope with what we have because we can handle all that is given to us.

I want to enjoy my time on my forum without fear. I have a voice and I am not afraid to stand up for myself.

I am appreciative for what I have regardless what comes way.

What are you afraid of?

Regardless of what you have written, I am going to enjoy my time on the forum

Thank you for your time Raina and showing me your true colours.

[AniaR]

Nobody is bullying you. You made 29 threads. Only one didn't get replies. Why do you get to treat people this way and use Autism as an excuse? Why do we need to constantly justify ourselves and why or why we don't post? I have been perfectly civil with you. I just didn't write no offence every time I said something. Pretty much everything you have said to me has either been asking for help or attacking me. True colors? Are you even for real right now?

I think what you feel are attacks are a common response people with autism and other socially based disorders feel when people put down boundaries. Boundaries are hard to understand with social disorders and often elicit a fear response in people. I put down a boundary with you. And even though everyone is saying almost word for word what I'm saying you are fixating on me because I put down the boundary of no PMs.

I just really can't even with this thread anymore. I feel like you aren't absorbing what we all keep saying to you so what's the point? I hope you'll take a break from posting and familiarize yourself with how the forum works

[Elle]

[PearlieMae]

It is a lucky thing that all this shit got straightened out, because before I got down to the calming down/resolution part of this whole ordeal, I was ready to start tearing new assholes.

[Merman Arion]

It is a lucky thing that all this shit got straightened out, because before I got down to the calming down/resolution part of this whole ordeal, I was ready to start tearing new assholes.

I feel you. I had a tough time to not say anything.
Hugs

[Mermaid Harmony]

As someone who is best friends with Coradion, I've seen both sides of Raina as she can get frustrated with him or a few others, and as she's been nice. In this case, I see it as she's being fairly clear and trying to be none biased as possible and lay it out straight. She can be fiesty, just check the drama thread, she's been banned I think (Raina correct me if I'm wrong) more than almost anyone on the forum for different amounts of times. But in ever reply to you (that I've read at the moment) she's been pretty bland in her answers of emotion (IMO) as to not get anyone riled up. I get what you are saying as we should all watch what we say, but we've all been pretty simple in our actions and no one has attacked, as for the replies that others have written they've seemed in line with Rainas of just 'check the forum' which if you check other threads people have started with only a few replies it's been the same 'this has already been answered here______ or check this thread or page for the info, it's already up "
you wrote
Your energy, your words whether written or spoken are like psychic attacks Raina, they are like daggers being stabbed into my body. Do I not have a right to speak up how I feel? You are hurting me.
Which is valid in your own right to feel that way, but I feel as what I've read that she hasn't attacked you in any way.
I hope you are your own leader and proud and loving in your own right and that you grow to read the forum, but as we've said before, tons of stuff has been covered, and in this instance I don't think anyone has been outrageously rude or angry towards you (I haven't read everything) I've seen some pretty brutal and mean things people have written on this forum and have seen Raina and others go on the attack (No offense doll, just statement, I still adore you) but she's not in this case (again, in my opinion, but I'm pretty sure others would agree with me). I hope you have a good night, and can swim soon. Sometimes we all just need a good swim, sleep and food. :-)

[PearlieMae]

Long, vicious post had been deleted.

PS: Aurora, Learn how to use apostrophes correctly.

[Elle]

you know it's gone on too far when Pearlie looses her shit...

[PearlieMae]

I deleted it. I don't have time for this bullshit. I have saved it, though...don't think I won't repost as necessary.

[SeaGlass Siren]

This is why I've stopped responding to threads. Because THIS happens.
I've read the other two threads created prior to this as well. Smh.
Just gonna swim away from this thread

[Mermaid Sirenia]

Wow okay really, I have nothing to say, this isn't worth my time. I'm just going to go drink a cup of tea and calm myself down lol

[Merman Arion]

I have facepalmed my forehead way too many times because of her. I'm not gonna do that again

[Mermaid Harmony]

I'm glad this calmed down. I seriously hate mermaid drama. I feel like mermaids can get really dramatic really fast (as can humans) but sometimes it grows fast on the forum, so I'm glad everyone breathed.

[Ilyena]

You know when you get a feeling about someone...I was right. Ima go take some painkillers and sleep now.

[shimmygoddess]

Aurora, I am not sure the questions you were asking, but that happens in a forum. People are busy and they don't have time to respond to everything. Alot of times it is the same questions repeated and if someone took a little time to search the topics they could find their answers. I understand what Autism is about, my son has it. I am sorry you have been bullied in the past, noone deserves that. There are alot of new mermaids that come on here asking a billion and one questions and sometimes I know, I just skip answering because its tiresome. I am not doing it to be mean or a bully, just because I have limited time on here. People ask questions all the time and they will sometimes go unanswered, that happens to everyone. It is not just you. Just try and relax, let it go.Also look online for answers. Good luck

[AniaR]

Thanks everyone. We have said all these same things over and over now in several threads. I feel like a broken record. Not saying this to be mean at all: i just have no idea how else to make it stick!

[AniaR]

It took a lottttt of self control lol

[shimmygoddess]

FYI, there are mers in VA. My advice is to get on FB and look for some groups. I think there are several. Chesepeke Pod is one. East coast mermaids in another

[MermaidMerida]

Its ok merida I get where you're coming from. I know it can be frustrating just try not to take it personal cuz it really isn't. Just keep posting and getting to know people. I understand you just really want a mermaid community to call your own.

Maybe we can like I said earlier make a clearer etiquette guide and I'll be sure to mention the thing about views! Its kinda like fb fan pages. You have reach which is all the people who see the post and usually the people who like it are far less lol

yeah I think an actual rules thread or some such thing would help immensly and honestly I had no idea she had posted so many threads all I saw when I came in here was it looked like she was being attacked so I went off cuz I hate seeing that kind of thing so Im sorry for flipping my shit at you....