Self Image Issues

**aWittleNoob** · 01-10-2012, 03:17 PM

I see lots of different people sporting a tail, among other things, and I'm not the pretttiest or best looking... I think im pretty below average, and I want a tail, and woul dlike to have a mer facebook, and mertail..... but I feel like..... Beauty plays a big role on the internet, and on youtube.... I mean, I've seen merman wear make up among other things to make themsleves look better or pretterier, but i dont have that face shape some guys my age have.... then thin fmeine "skater/emo/snowboard" whatever you wanna call it faceshape.... I'm thin ang youne.... but I feel kinda nervous on putting myself out there.... I really like swimming, and stuff, and mermaids, but if a pretty person wears a tail, they get judged less. then if an ugly person wears a tail....

so, the question is

To wear a tail?
or not to wear a tail?

**AniaR** · 01-10-2012, 03:37 PM

once you put that tail on you will find a new confidence you didnt know you had. I promise

**New York Mermaid** · 01-10-2012, 04:00 PM

Listen no matter what you think of yourself, people see you entirely differently. Always remember your a beautiful person, whether in tail or without your going to be you, this is your dream, this is your life and with a tail you feel more empowered (well i do and im not so confident about my appearance as much- needless to say i look about 4 months pregnant) But in tail its like a new person, your merself is your character. No one is ugly their different, and some people cant accept that. But this is real life and despite who you are/what you look like it shouldnt matter to ANYONE as long as your happy with yourself.

**Joy&RaptorsUnrestrained!** · 01-10-2012, 04:06 PM

Also, there are a lot of different people on here, some very beautiful and attractive and handsome, and others not so much (at least in the classic sense of the word), but still possessed of a beauty that comes from doing something magical that they love and re-creating themselves into something new. Just check out some of the galleries and relax a little. It doesn't sound like you're trying to make a little money off of being a merman, just trying to enjoy the experience... so don't let anyone else's attitude towards how you should look get in the way of your potential.

**Mermaid Hamant** · 01-10-2012, 07:19 PM

Like Lanai said, no one is ugly, people are just different. Everbody is different. Regaurdless, you will have this whole forum's support if you do decide to sport a tail. We do not judge people by their appearence here. All mers are beautiful here whether they think they are or not.

**-Annwyn-** · 01-10-2012, 09:32 PM

To wear a tail or not, only you can answer that question.

Nobody is the same, and beauty is subjective. What one persons sees as beautiful, other people pass it by. If what you're really worried about is being teased for wearing a tail, then it's not an issue about beauty alone, it's an issue about self esteem.

I can vouch for Raina that once you wear a tail, it just feels right. And I'm not perfect, I have my lumps and bumps, and I'm one of the larger mers. But when I finally went out and began mermaiding, I found a confidence I never had before.

YOU must find your own confidence. Nobody else can do it for you. Everyone here will support you all the way, but we cannot tell you what you need to do.

Live your dreams.

Good luck!

**koiboi** · 01-10-2012, 11:20 PM

i say wear the tail, i can relate to these issues but at the end of the day would you deny yourself the call of the sea because you were afraid you didnt live up to some ridiculous standard of beauty? I think to be vulnerable and fearless is the most beautiful thing anyone can attain. to show yourself, your true self and not care what others say or think. I say DO it, and take pictures!

**Nate Walis** · 01-12-2012, 10:07 AM

I think you've made a positive first step in actually having the guts to stand up and share your issues with people on here, that to me says that you really want to make an effort to emancipate yourself and wear the tail.

I agree that if you do it will give you a boost, but I worry that you might not have the confidence at the moment to do it.

You describe yourself as a noob in your username, but I'd suggest that you take the time and really immerse yourself in the threads and discussions that go on around here as this is a place where you'll find a large number of intelligent and understanding people into the same things as you.

Building confidence takes time and you have to accept that there may be setbacks, but as far as looks are concerned, I'm sure that no one on here will object to me saying that we as a commuinty have few examples of Olympian perfection amongst us as a group (I always use an avatar that's not a picture of me for fear of inducing seizures and trauma); what makes the people who don the tails around here sparkle is the fact that they're doing something that they love and thrive on.

Get into the community, be prepared for the long-haul and make the most of what you have...you'd be surprised how little the vast majority of people are actually concerned with your imperfections as opposed to being interested in what makes you an interesting person to be around.