Merfolk Writer's Guild

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

My story isn't intended to be strictly scientific, and it doesn't take place anywhere on Earth because the World of Wayward Tides is a world I created with its own natural order. So, my mentality was and is to create a world excluding a LOT of stuff. Like if I had to explain it, there is no United States, there isn't any of the world history as we know it in our reality, and not everything in science can explain everything in the world this story takes place in. So, that's just kinda my mindset creating my world and everything in it. There is an element of magic.

http://www.patreon.com/posts/7876460

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[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

I wanted to think about...
What is the World of Wayward Tides? What is the history of the World of Wayward Tides? What are the Merfolk? What are the Sylph? What are the Dragons? What are the humans? What is the Umbra? What are the Fallen, Mortaran, Nightmares, and Corrupted? What are the Titans? What are the Origin Spirits? Who are the characters? And etc. I'm not thinking about anything else that isn't in the story.

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[Mermaid Kane]

Nice story! It's 7,000 words, so I can't finish it all right now. It's off to a good start, but there are some things you can change. You use words repetitively, so you may want to find alternatives to engage the reader.

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

Nice story! It's 7,000 words, so I can't finish it all right now. It's off to a good start, but there are some things you can change. You use words repetitively, so you may want to find alternatives to engage the reader.

I've been trying to fix that. Thanks for letting me know.

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[Mermaid Kane]

I've been trying to fix that. Thanks for letting me know.

Sometimes, it's a tough issues. I mean, there are only so many words for ''water'', or ''light''. It get HARD sometimes.

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

Sometimes, it's a tough issues. I mean, there are only so many words for ''water'', or ''light''. It get HARD sometimes.

The "light blue" is used twice in the first paragraph to describe the color of Dylan Tidalian's ear fins and tail. I'm not sure how I can not repeat that.

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[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

I did notice some other things, but I need to do homework.

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[Mermaid Kane]

The "light blue" is used twice in the first paragraph to describe the color of Dylan Tidalian's ear fins and tail. I'm not sure how I can not repeat that.

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''crystal colored''? baby blue? Dunno.

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

''crystal colored''? baby blue? Dunno.

Not sure about those. The colors are the same for ear fins and the tail...light blue refers to a lighter shade of blue... There are many different names for different shades... The problem with crystal colored is that crystals can be any color of the rainbow and baby blue is specific but does not leave much to the imagination. Light blue is vague and descriptive enough to allow someone to imagine his tail and fins.

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[Mermaid Kane]

Not sure about those. The colors are the same for ear fins and tail...light blue refers a lighter shade of blue... There are many different names for different shades... The problem with crystal colored is that crystals can be any color of the rainbow and baby blue is specific but does not leave much to the imagination. Light blue is vague and descriptive enough to allow someone to imagine his tail and fins.

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Mkay.

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

Mkay.

I may need to think about it.

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[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

Mermaid Kane. Even if it doesn't look like I value your opinion, I do. My biggest problem right now is having the time to make ANY changes.

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[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

My greatest challenge might be that those descriptive words, whatever they may be, will be repeated regardless.

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[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

It's a lot to think about.

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[Mermaid Kane]

Mermaid Kane. Even if it doesn't look like I value your opinion, I do. My biggest problem right now is having the time to make ANY changes.

That's not the impression I got at all! Sorry if I sounded sarcastic, I just didn't have much more to say. ^^''
There a ton of things to think about when writing a book, so much so that I am scrapping my entire old idea to remake one that has more moral plot and value then just an interesting fictional book.

I wish you good luck!

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

That's not the impression I got at all! Sorry if I sounded sarcastic, I just didn't have much more to say. ^^''
There a ton of things to think about when writing a book, so much so that I am scrapping my entire old idea to remake one that has more moral plot and value then just an interesting fictional book.

I wish you good luck!

Thank you.

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[Triton-Mahtlinnie]

I had the idea of merfolk being rescue divers and salvors, who respond when a ship sinks and rescue passengers. Then groups go in and negotiate with the ship owners to salvage the wreckage. It's set in the Seattle area in an alternate 1920's (where people know merfolk exist) One conflict is the fact that the merfolk, though they can grow legs, don't see the point in clothes. The humans are rather scandalized.

- the scene where the main character is turned, if anyone is curious.

"Marguerite settled on the bottom with a horrible crunch, her hull crumpling with the impact. And then, everything was silent. It was almost peaceful, watching the chairs float through the swirling waters in the salon. Ezra’s lungs burned, begging for air, and his vision began to blacken at the corners. So this was the end.

There was sudden movement from the other end of the salon, and Ezra felt arms grab him around his chest. Was he being saved? Who would save him?

Something pressed against his lips and Ezra involuntarily inhaled, the liquid burning as it went down his throat. It was like a fire spread through his limbs, then turned to ice. Ezra took another breath and clarity suddenly rushed back into his vision. He could breathe again, somehow, and the water became crystal clear to his eyes. He saw a flash of bright blue scales and black hair before he passed out. "

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

I had the idea of merfolk being rescue divers and salvors, who respond when a ship sinks and rescue passengers. Then groups go in and negotiate with the ship owners to salvage the wreckage. It's set in the Seattle area in an alternate 1920's (where people know merfolk exist) One conflict is the fact that the merfolk, though they can grow legs, don't see the point in clothes. The humans are rather scandalized.

- the scene where the main character is turned, if anyone is curious.

"Marguerite settled on the bottom with a horrible crunch, her hull crumpling with the impact. And then, everything was silent. It was almost peaceful, watching the chairs float through the swirling waters in the salon. Ezra’s lungs burned, begging for air, and his vision began to blacken at the corners. So this was the end.

There was sudden movement from the other end of the salon, and Ezra felt arms grab him around his chest. Was he being saved? Who would save him?

Something pressed against his lips and Ezra involuntarily inhaled, the liquid burning as it went down his throat. It was like a fire spread through his limbs, then turned to ice. Ezra took another breath and clarity suddenly rushed back into his vision. He could breathe again, somehow, and the water became crystal clear to his eyes. He saw a flash of bright blue scales and black hair before he passed out. "

That sounds like an awesome story!!!

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[Keiris]

Indeed it does, Exdraghunt!!!

[Merman Dylan Zalrian]

I had the idea of merfolk being rescue divers and salvors, who respond when a ship sinks and rescue passengers. Then groups go in and negotiate with the ship owners to salvage the wreckage. It's set in the Seattle area in an alternate 1920's (where people know merfolk exist) One conflict is the fact that the merfolk, though they can grow legs, don't see the point in clothes. The humans are rather scandalized.

- the scene where the main character is turned, if anyone is curious.

"Marguerite settled on the bottom with a horrible crunch, her hull crumpling with the impact. And then, everything was silent. It was almost peaceful, watching the chairs float through the swirling waters in the salon. Ezra’s lungs burned, begging for air, and his vision began to blacken at the corners. So this was the end.

There was sudden movement from the other end of the salon, and Ezra felt arms grab him around his chest. Was he being saved? Who would save him?

Something pressed against his lips and Ezra involuntarily inhaled, the liquid burning as it went down his throat. It was like a fire spread through his limbs, then turned to ice. Ezra took another breath and clarity suddenly rushed back into his vision. He could breathe again, somehow, and the water became crystal clear to his eyes. He saw a flash of bright blue scales and black hair before he passed out. "

Your story falls into the category of something I want to see more of.

Merfolk are always becoming human. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it appears the human is becoming a mer.

My story has a possible character that becomes a mer, but what I'm trying to avoid is the whole transformation thing from human to mer and vice versa. That's another thing I want to see more of in story.

However, from what I read, you have an awesome idea with elements I wish were in more stories.

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