B!TC# IT OUT!

[Sea~Phoenix Savannah]

So I guess I am kind of interuptting a conversation here, but I need to let something out.

My boyfriend of a over year left me for one of my friends. Who was claimed by him to be a better person than me. (and trust me she is rude, hateful, and many people have claimed it)

I'll admit it wasn't the best relationship, but it was my first real relationship and at the end things were going better than they had been.

We have know each other for over 2 years and we grew so close to on another; he was basically my best friend. He was my first kiss and my first love. However I learned he was arrogant, egotistic, and basically a narcissist.

I tried to seperate myself from him before, but I thought something had changed. He kept making me see how everything was my fault and though I resisted that belief, I eventually started to believe it all.

After a year of arguing and us not talking to each other for over a month, we tried to work things out and it was going really well. Until I got really busy for about a week straight and he didn't get enough attention.

He blamed me for creating excuses when I tried to fix it and finally that weekend he told me he was tired of dealing with me.

Throughout the next week, my friend dumped her boyfriend and go togther with mine.

I thought I was fine being without him and at first I was. But now, I can't remember how frustrating I felt or how much he hurt me. Every day is a toss up on whether I am going to be an emotional wreck or strong.

I knew I was on the edge of breaking down when I went to a local festival to sell raffle tickets, but I thought it would help me not think about everything. When I showed up he was there with my friend, arms wrapped each other. They went to watch the bands at the stage, but they kept parading back and forth past my booth and they always made sure to at least hold hands when they'd pass.

I just feel very betrayed and hurt and a slight bit angry.

Especially at the fact that I knew his mom wouldn't take pictures or a video of him at graduation so I did and sent it to him. I knew that he would want something to remember him getting his diploma and walking across (I knew his new gf would do it, but I didn't see her there). I saw he had seen it and I didn't even get a thank you in return. So I commented on not getting a thank you and he looked at it and never said a word.

So again even slightly more upset.

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Mermaid Izzy, I feel you. I was 100% where you were a few years ago. I had a friend that I started dating, the relationship lasted for 4 years, he too was my best friend, first love and first real relationship.

He also would blame me for some his choices "but you weren't available that day." though he was more of a narcissist and pushover.

We had good and bad times, I had also separated from and gotten back together with him, but at the end he just told me not to call him.

I frequently saw him with his girlfriend who I knew and previously tried to be friends with although she was just acting nice toward me while trying to get closer to my (now ex) boyfriend.

She would hug/kiss/cuddle him whenever I was around, it broke my heart so much I had to leave whenever she came by and it caused me to practically abandon my friends because my ex and I shared friends and therefore so did she.

I felt heartbroken, alone, betrayed, depressed and angry (at him, his girlfriend, one of her friends and myself).

I was depressed for so long after that, I had my strong days and my emotionally wrecked days.

Also I think that it was beyond nice of you to take a video for him.

Mermaid Izzy, you are way better off without either of them (even though it may not always seem like it). It may help to distance yourself physically from that situation and definitely from them while you heal. This will sound cliche but even though it may not be easy it is possible and there will definitely be better days ahead of you. If you ever want anyone to talk to I'm happy to lend an ear, just PM me.

Also, people aren't lying when they say karma's a b****, i just sat back and smiled myself as his new girlfriend cheated on him and then dumped him for another guy that I was a close acquaintance with. He then came to me heartbroken and wanted me back, though the one in my case doing the shutting out was me > (I feel I should say this, I did try to speak with him years later and "just be friends" but he was only interested in using me to make himself feel better and offered almost nothing in return. People like that rarely change.)

Again, if you need a friend I'm here.