B!TC# IT OUT!

[roamingmer]

Sounds like your friend needed an injection of empathy.
Sometimes the words spoken in haste may not be the most thoughtful and become much worse when coupled with sunstroke and exhaustion. Try to rise above it by cresting through the surf and allowing your heart to sing with joy about who you are deep down.

[Mermaid Annariea]

little orca, ignore her. i would have wussed out in cold water too, and in leech-infested water. i wouldnt have even gotten in. that doesnt mean im any less of a mermaid than anyone else, and same for you.

[MrOrca]

The worst part was she really seemed mad that we could not handle the cold of the water (not to be mean) when she is much more insulated and I am not just talking about the neoprene tail... I guess she assumed I was a professional photographer and that regardless of the situation I was going to direct her... Not to mention that the river was nasty, I slipped on the rocks and nearly killed myself right in front of her, and the fact that the river is cold as a freezer...

[LittleTreasure]

LittleOrca, you are NOT a wuss...don't let some person you barely know anymore bring you down with mean comments. I'm sorry you had a hard time! Just because you are a mermaid doesn't mean you aren't human too, and nobody has nerves of steel...so cold water plus the worms would've made me think twice about touching that water too. I probably would've only posed beside the water, knowing how sensitive I can be about water temperature.

[Spindrift]

I got dumped yesterday, out of an 8-month relationship. (Unnaturally short for me, since the relationship before that was 2 years and the one before that was 3 years so it's not like I date people like they're a passing fancy or something.) Anyway, from what I 'know', neither of us wanted to be separated. We were really good friends for a really long time (met him in 2009) before anything happened. However the guy was quite a bit older than me and was getting increasingly uncomfortable with the situation, especially since some of his neighbors made some comments and his profession requires him to rely on his reputation (performer). He also claimed it was because I will be moving away in a year or two and he wants to find someone who would stay around. It isn't fair. I feel really empty. And we run stuff together so it's not like I can't see him. I can't talk to anyone about it since no one would have approved of it in the first place. I really hurt right now and I can't stop being mopey even though I've already been asked out twice in the past week (no one really knew about the relationship except for my mer-partner so everyone else thinks I'm single). Also this came out of nowhere to me, although he claims it has been bothering him for a while. I'm so frustrated with myself and everything hurts.

[Mermaid Saphira]

I got dumped yesterday, out of an 8-month relationship. (Unnaturally short for me, since the relationship before that was 2 years and the one before that was 3 years so it's not like I date people like they're a passing fancy or something.) Anyway, from what I 'know', neither of us wanted to be separated. However the guy was quite a bit older than me and was getting increasingly uncomfortable with the situation, especially since some of his neighbors made some comments and his profession requires him to rely on his reputation (performer). He also claimed it was because I will be moving away in a year or two and he wants to find someone who would stay around. It isn't fair. I feel really empty. And we run stuff together so it's not like I can't see him. I can't talk to anyone about it since no one would have approved of it in the first place. I really hurt right now and I can't stop being mopey even though I've already been asked out twice in the past week (no one really knew about the relationship except for my mer-partner so everyone else thinks I'm single). Also this came out of nowhere to me, although he claims it has been bothering him for a while. I'm so frustrated with myself and everything hurts.

merhugs <3

[Mermaid Celissa]

Aw, I'm sorry Spin! If you want to vent or chat, you can always PM me

[Little_Orca]

*Hugs for Spin* Sorry sweetheart.

[Mermaid Annariea]

one of my other passions is singing.
so, i met a friend online through a girl i know personally, because he and i started talking about music on one of her facebook statuses. hes really cool, and we got to know each other, however not in any sort of flirting manner. he has a girlfriend and a daughter, and completely loves them, and i have been with my boyfriend for 5 years now, and id NEVER flirt with someone else.

anyways, he is from finland, and finnish is his first language.
i dont speak finnish, but i learned a song in finnish ("kuolema tekee taiteilijan" by nightwish), and told him about it because he knew of the band. he asked me to record me singing it, so i did (like weeks after we started talking). i figured it could be a good way to get constructive criticism on how to pronounce the words properly, and recorded myself singing it. i posted it on youtube, and linked to it on facebook after he saw it and said my finnish wasnt too bad, since it wasnt a bad video, and it wasnt supposed to be personal or anything.
i said that it was originally for a friend in the description, and my boyfriend asked who, so i told him.
hes been furious with me since last night.

I DONT KNOW WHAT I DID WRONG. i really dont understand, and im so pissed off and i keep just bursting into tears. i deleted the video, but of course, hes still angry at me. usually when hes mad, he just sleeps it off and the next day hes fine. NOPE. i went to snuggle with him this morning, figuring he would be okay again, and he pushed me away and said "stay the f*ck off me".

I REALLY DONT GET IT, THERE WAS NOTHING IN THE ENTIRE VIDEO THAT HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN MAD ABOUT.
i guess hes mad because i sang something for someone else? a guy, for that matter?
i didnt think that he would get mad about something like that, though, thats the thing. otherwise i wouldnt have done it. i just figured "hey why not, its a good way to see if im pronouncing it right rather than just guessing or sticking it on youtube for EVERYONE to see and criticize."

im so pissed off, and i dont know what to do about it. i just want to scream and punch things. this makes me so upset. ugh. :'(

[Mer_Adella]

Okay so here's my b*tch....

My 40hr /week job is answering phones, paying bills, payroll, customer service, janitorial duties (my title is office manager but my boss refers to me as his glorified secretary [b*tch #1]).

My problem is that i work in a heavy equipment diesel shop we work on everything ranging from tractors to large semis and the occasional vehicle. My boss says that first come first serve, but he tends to work on his friends and his own while customers equipment sits untouched (at one point an entire year!). And then when those customers come in, obviously irate, he tells me to deal with them. Other times he and the customer just yell at each other till one of them backs down. In my mind, he is a horrible boss, shouldn't own his own company, and doesn't have any people skills what-so-ever.

I also work for 9.50/hr (which i know i shouldn't complain about since so many don't have jobs right now) but i have been working here for over a year and haven't gotten a raise although he has said i am getting one. Everytime that I bring it up, he says that he will change it in the computer. UGH HELLO....i'm the one that changes it. he also tells customers he will bring their parts in (beacuse they are at his house) and he never brings them in. suddenly they arrive by UPS (he never had them at all just jerked them along until UPS delivered them)

my boyfriend at one point told me to quit. not even to show up to work and just take a month or two off. I couldn't do that. I have responsibilities and morals. I wont quit before giving 2 weeks and having another job (which i have been looking for 6 months and still nothing). I just dont know how much more I can take. I am at my breaking point. Every morning I wish that a deer would jump in front of my truck so i could have a reason for not coming in, or a blown tire, or the flu, or something!

[SilverSiren]

Brianna- That's a MASSIVE over reaction from the BF there! Something else is going on with him and you should tell him that you need to have a real conversation with him in all seriousness. I do NOT want to jump to conclusions here at all but when people act like that (in my personal experience) it's because they have done exactly what they are trying to put you in blame for, so they don't have to feel bad about what they did, especially when they make a MUCH bigger deal about it than they should. Human nature/psychology. *hugs*

Adell- Search for a job better suited to you that would make you happier and give you they pay and respect you deserve. Give your two weeks notice when you find said job. Tell your boss it was nice working with the company but you feel it's time to move on. Life is too short to be wasting your time in a job that only serves to make you miserable!

[Mer_Adella]

SilverSiren- thanks for that. I am looking, specifically in the medical field. I want to work in the medical field so bad, but I am not limiting my options. I have put my resume out there and am looking everywhere. I am just waiting for that one person whose willing to give me an interview. I would love to quit right now, just to ease my life a little bit, but like you and I have said, find the said job first.

[Alveric]

Adella: If your current job is near breaking you, don't hold out for the perfect job. Find a fall-back that's less stressful, even if it pays less. Then resume your search for something better.

[SilverSiren]

SilverSiren- thanks for that. I am looking, specifically in the medical field. I want to work in the medical field so bad, but I am not limiting my options. I have put my resume out there and am looking everywhere. I am just waiting for that one person whose willing to give me an interview. I would love to quit right now, just to ease my life a little bit, but like you and I have said, find the said job first.

Have you tried calling the paces you send in your resume at? Call them. Tell them you would really like to work with them and would appreciate the opportunity to have a interview with them to see if your a fit for their company and if their company is a fit for you. Oh, and one thing that employers actually LIKE is when the interviewee has questions for them too! A question a lot of people don't ask that is a really good one, not just for the interviewer but for your personal future knowledge, is "What about my resume interested you the most to consider me a potential employee for your company?". Do this toward the end of the interview, the answer may surprise you and they will be reminded of why they considered you in the first place. Sorry if this isn't anything of news for you, just tryin to help

[Mer_Adella]

SilverSiren- your right in the regard that it isn't news to me, I have called they all just tell me they are still reviewing or they chose someone else. I thank them and that's that. But I read your question that people should ask at the end of an interview and its a really good question. I normally always have quesitons for the interviewer when I am getting interviewed. But I never thought to ask that question. Thanks for the advice

[AniaR]

insomnia. It's driving me bonkers. I am so tired but having a really hard time sleeping. I usually have a bad cycle of insomnia once a year or so. We live so close to a highway that the cars are going all night and keep me awake. The people below me smoke like a chimney IN THEIR ROOM so to stop from waking up with second hand smoke I had to buy an air purifier and put it on EVERY night. If I don't I always wake up in a cloud of smoke. I'm also just a very light sleeper so any noise will wake me up. Feeling tired and run down. I do take meds for it, but I do find that usually once a year they aren't very effective so I think this is it. Going to see about upping the dose if it's cool with the doc. Fins crossed.

[Mermaid Margarete]

Okay, here's my rant:
I put hours into an experiemential personal fund raiser for a hobby of mine and then I launch it. I'm not holding my breath for any results but I make sure I make my close friends and family aware of it.
A few hours pass and one of my really good friends sends me a PM saying how much she hopes I don't get mad at her and how much she loves me but she basically thinks I'm a terrible person for fund raising for something personal. I send her a message back saying while I respect her point of view I'm not doing anything wrong or that breaks any rules. She then proceeds to say how she hopes my fund raiser does well and that she wishes she lived closer (she moved recently) so I wouldn't have to do the fund raiser and she could just help me one on one etc etc. She also claims that asking for money for this sort of hobby is highly frowned upon in that community.

SOO I look into her cliams by going to the most popular forum for this hobby and searching for "crowdsourcing" the term she used to describe me using a website for a fund raiser... AND I found ONE forum topic on it...

It's author?

My friend.

It was started this morning.

As I read it I found myself in shock... she was being two faced towards me saying things such as "how do I explain this to my friend who is doing this and asking everyone we know for help. I wish I could just tell her that this isn't cool but she is one of my best friends but honestly her doing this is really disappointing and makes me mad."

I PM'ed her back, letting her know I found the forum post and felt like she was being two faced with her so-called "honesty" ... she hasn't repsonded since...

Do you ever wish you were wrong about something that you innocently stumbled upon?... cause I do right now...

and I feel sick...

[AniaR]

ugh Im so sorry you are having that experience. That sucks

[Ashe]

Im sorry about that Gintsuki I really dont think that's ok, and im mad that she did this. Lot's of people fundraise for hobbies! I can't remember specific names at the moment, but ive seen many mers fundraise for tails and items that they want! Ive come across other hobby kickstarters too! I see nothing wrong with that at all. If people want to be generous, they will! If not, tough cookies, no milk. It's not like you're demanding for money! No, she is the one who doesnt understand. Sorry that im insulting your friend, but she is a huge wuss not to talk to you about this in person, and feels the need to ask online strangers for help about something she believes is a big issue when it's not, and then not being honest with you at all. Big coward.

K, im done.

[Mermaid Annariea]

Brianna- That's a MASSIVE over reaction from the BF there! Something else is going on with him and you should tell him that you need to have a real conversation with him in all seriousness. I do NOT want to jump to conclusions here at all but when people act like that (in my personal experience) it's because they have done exactly what they are trying to put you in blame for, so they don't have to feel bad about what they did, especially when they make a MUCH bigger deal about it than they should. Human nature/psychology. *hugs*

nah, he isnt doing anything wrong... id know if i had reasons to be suspicious. been there, done that with him, about 4 years ago haha. hes just a jealous and overprotective person by nature. later that day, he took me out to lunch and said he just wanted to drop it, and asked that i dont do it again, at least without him knowing/being okay with it. and we were fine after that. plus, he wasnt accusing me of cheating or being unfaithful... i think he just got really jealous that i sang for another guy.

my biggest problem now is that... on the 29th, the friend i made the video for... i called him "finland", because he was super finnish. anyways... hed been fighting depression for a really long time... and he killed himself. he almost told me too, over facebook, just hours before he did it. he IM-ed me and said, "hey i have really bad news for you. and i dont think youll understand..." but when i asked what was wrong, he took a few minutes and just replied, "im swedish ^-^". i laughed and figured he was just being goofy like he usually was...
im so mad at him for thinking that was the proper way of dealing with it, i dont understand how he could do this to everyone he loved. he had a 5 year old daughter! he just... left her, even though he had recently gotten back together with the childs mother. he seemed so happy and i just dont understand.

UGH. PERKELE.
IM SO MAD. AND SAD. AND I JUST WISH I COULD HELP HIS FAMILY MORE.
which is another thing. he didnt even tell his family about his daughter because he was afraid theyd look down on him because most of them were super christian.
SO I HAVE TO TRY AND EXPLAIN ALL OF THAT TO THEM. WTF WTF.

i almost wish i could bring him back to life and kill him myself.
but id probably just slap him.
really, really hard.

i just dont know what the proper way of handling this is. im so upset and im trying not to blame myself, but i feel like i couldve done more.