I'm an idiot on land- I was much better suited for water! I trip over stuff, bang my legs into every corner in my house and crash my mountain bike WAAAYYY to often. In a nutshell, I get injured a lot. I have health insurance, but the ER and Doctors are expensive anyway and so I am learning the fine art of self healing! (For NON-LIFE OR LIMB THREATENING INJURIES AND ILLNESSES) I'll share some of what I've learned as I go!
Witch hazel! soak a washcloth in it, apply to bumps and/or bruises, cover with saran wrap and an ace bandage. Leave it there for a couple hours. It really helps with pain and inflammation.

Activated charcoal- you can get this in capsules at a health food store, or at least that's how I do it. They are in the digestive health section. make a paste with the charcoal (after it's out of the cap of course) and water and spread it over gauze or a paper towel large enough to cover the affected area, top with another layer of gauze or towel, lay the damp poultice over the area you are treating, cover with saran wrap and wrap with an ace bandage- NOT TOO TIGHT, you don't want to impede blood flow- and leave it there for 8-10 hours. The charcoal draws out toxins and helps reduce pain and swelling over bad bruises, wounds that have formed a scab, arthritis ect. DO NOT put a charcoal poultice over a fresh bloody wound. And remember to stay on top on your tetanus shots. I'll add more stuff as I go along and when I have the time.