So, this is something I can't really talk about with friends, but hey, I can talk about it here.

I've been dating my boyfriend for three years. For the first year and a half, I was managing a frame shop and drawing a lot, and he loved that. We spent a lot of time gaming together, planning future excursions, and we had a lot in common.

Then I decided I wanted to start producing entertainment and performing Burlesque, which I did. I have three successful productions running, I perform 5-6 times a month, plus my upcoming mermaid party gigs, plus I'm in the process of starting a Dr. Sketchy's. That said... I'm very busy. But I love it... it makes me feel like something I'm doing is making a difference, and all my hard work and training is paying off... and I actually make most of my living off of entertainment.

He wants to be supportive, he's proud of me. But he doesn't find Burlesque interesting and he's not happy that I'm taking off my clothes in front of people. He also is introverted and doesn't do well with big groups of people he doesn't know, so I can't really count on him to enjoy being, or even want to be, a mertender. We've been slowly growing apart since I started being active in performance, and it's really affecting me... I feel guilty for working on costumes or acts, I feel guilty networking and promoting myself, and I feel guilty for being out of town performing.

All the things we had in common... he dropped. He used to love going surfing and being at the beach, which is my happy place. He would come with me to visit my family on a nearby island and we'd go kayaking. We would make waffles and sew together- he loved making costumes and Halloween. Now that he works 40-hour weeks (he just graduated) he's always tired and depressed.

I'm just starting to feel like I've been ignoring the fact that we might just be too different. We both want to be happy, we both love each other, but everything just feels like it's falling apart between us. We live together, we have a pet cat, and I work part time at our apartment complex... so if we broke up I'd have to find a new place to live, say goodbye to my kitty who I love deeply, find a new job, and somehow cope with losing someone I love. He's just not himself anymore- the things we had in common he doesn't do any more, and he doesn't want to be a part of what I do.

I mainly just wanted to vent about it... but I feel very lost. This sadness is taking over my life right now.