B!TC# IT OUT!

[Lotus the Mermaid]

I'm a bit lost and upset right now.
A photo taken of me years ago in my tail being wheeled in a wheelchair between gigs has surfaced again online. I was unaware the photo was being taken, so I have no idea who did it. But it was posted on Tumblr and someone tagged it as 'disabled princess'. A popular page found it last night and has shared it (Alternative Disney) and tagged my page.
I have gotten SO much hate mail from people saying I'm claiming to be disabled.
I never posted the picture in the first place, nor tagged it 'disabled princess'. That tag should belong to someone who is actually disabled, and even though I've tried contacting the page, reporting the photo, etc, they wont take it down or change it. I'm feeling rather helpless and seeing the darkest side of the internet. I've even made a post on my mermaid page urging people not to get mad, but people still are.
What can I do? My anxiety is through the roof regarding it.

Take a break from the internet, remember that people have no power over you and the truth wins in the end. You've done all that you need to do. If you receive harassment after explaining yourself on your public Facebook page, report it and wash your hands of those responsible. Once you've taken a break from the internet, look at potential steps you can take. Comment on the photo and explain the situation and that the poster will not take the picture and false claim down. People will likely rally behind you. If not, then once again, you did your best. And remember this above all else: for every hater, you have at least ten fans that adore you. I hope that helps. Talk to me if it ever gets to be too much. I'll be praying for them to stop. <3

[Felicia]

I'm a bit lost and upset right now.
A photo taken of me years ago in my tail being wheeled in a wheelchair between gigs has surfaced again online. I was unaware the photo was being taken, so I have no idea who did it. But it was posted on Tumblr and someone tagged it as 'disabled princess'. A popular page found it last night and has shared it (Alternative Disney) and tagged my page.
I have gotten SO much hate mail from people saying I'm claiming to be disabled.
I never posted the picture in the first place, nor tagged it 'disabled princess'. That tag should belong to someone who is actually disabled, and even though I've tried contacting the page, reporting the photo, etc, they wont take it down or change it. I'm feeling rather helpless and seeing the darkest side of the internet. I've even made a post on my mermaid page urging people not to get mad, but people still are.
What can I do? My anxiety is through the roof regarding it.

I went through and read all the comments and let me just say HOLY SHIT, people are ridiculous! Its not your fault someone tagged you with that and you've apologized for it, besides wheelchairs were made for those unable to walk, be it permanent or temporary, and you can't walk in a tail so you have every right to use it, disabled or not! People just need to get off their high horses, I have wheelchair bound family and yet do I take offense to someone using a wheelchair, disabled or not, NO! I get why the tag could be considered offensive but thats not your doing and there's nothing that you can currently do about that. I'm so sorry you have to go through this and I really hope you can get the picture and tag removed so that you can end this hate! You really dont deserve to go through this crap and if you need any help or just wanna talk I'm here! As someone with severe anxiety I understand the stress this causes

[Merman Arion]

I'm a bit lost and upset right now.
A photo taken of me years ago in my tail being wheeled in a wheelchair between gigs has surfaced again online. I was unaware the photo was being taken, so I have no idea who did it. But it was posted on Tumblr and someone tagged it as 'disabled princess'. A popular page found it last night and has shared it (Alternative Disney) and tagged my page.
I have gotten SO much hate mail from people saying I'm claiming to be disabled.
I never posted the picture in the first place, nor tagged it 'disabled princess'. That tag should belong to someone who is actually disabled, and even though I've tried contacting the page, reporting the photo, etc, they wont take it down or change it. I'm feeling rather helpless and seeing the darkest side of the internet. I've even made a post on my mermaid page urging people not to get mad, but people still are.
What can I do? My anxiety is through the roof regarding it.

Where is this?? I just can't find the post you're talking about.

[AniaR]

It is weird, people do seem to have issues with Mermaids using wheelchairs.

Sent from my MotoG3 using Tapatalk

[SeaGlass Siren]

I wonder why. It's like people just want to see us on the floor flopping around like a fish getting nowhere.

[Mizuko]

Alternative Disney deleted the post eventually! Im very grateful they listened. But the biggest trouble maker on the subject screenshot the post and is still attacking me over it. Ive deleted/banned them from my mermaid page and I guess thats all i can do... i dont understand how people think its not ok for us to use wheelchairs? They are a mobility aid. Ive worked at pools that wouldn't let my mertender carry me due to slip hazards so put me in their wheelchair, and hospitals prefer us using their wheelchairs when visiting children... I'm really praying it all blows over because I'm terrible at handling the anxiety associated with this kind of drama! I left a statement on my mermaid page and so far its been viewed 3000+ times so I'm hoping that'll appease most of the anger from people.

[Sabrina the Selkie]

So. I had a dream last night that basically put me into a terrible mood for the rest of the day.

I was at a freshman commencement ceremony at my second choice school. It wasn't really ceremonial but meh. I was sitting with a group of guys I'd met earlier in the day and we're talking lightly about our hobbies and politics and etc. Y'know the usual introductory discussion.

We notice there is an exorbitant amount of cake at the refreshment table that no one is allowed to touch yet. So we load up our plates and sit down.

Donald Trump gets on the stage to talk to the young people about how he's gonna make America great again.

It also happens to be his birthday. The cake gets cut and passed around.

So my table is entirely invested in a "what the hell?!" moment. Especially because our political discussion from earlier had been highly leftist.

The "what the hell?!" moment continues. I wake up, relieved to find that I'm not being forced to celebrate Trump's birthday but horrified to realize that I am still a second semester senior in high school still waiting to hear from my first choice school.


In the waking world, I meet a woman whose house was just burned out.

Then I go to work and find that the basement of my beloved library has been complete stripped out. The floor down there is being replaced, so while I knew it was coming it was still extremely jarring to see.

And all of this follows my grandfather going to the hospital again because of blood clots blocking his urinary tract. He has bladder cancer but refuses - and I agree with him here - to have it removed. So the best they can do is scrape the bladder free of cancer cells every few months. Every time he has it done, the surgeon bungles it and nicks the vein. So then the clotting blood blocks his urine.

He'd just come home after a valient attempt to flush out the blood on Wednesday. He left with a catheter but when the clots reaccumulated, they got so big even the catheter didn't help. So my mom brought him back to the hospital last night and I slept on my grandma's couch to just be there for her.

My mom and I go home at six a.m. and I get a few more hours of sleep. And that's when I had the Trump dream.

[Princess Pearl]

It is weird, people do seem to have issues with Mermaids using wheelchairs.

Sent from my MotoG3 using Tapatalk

I know! I did a three day event- day one and two I was in my chair, day three I wore my walking tail. People avoided me in the chair, but loved me as I waddled around in the skirt. Weird.

[PhaylennMurúch]

Alternative Disney deleted the post eventually! Im very grateful they listened. But the biggest trouble maker on the subject screenshot the post and is still attacking me over it. Ive deleted/banned them from my mermaid page and I guess thats all i can do... i dont understand how people think its not ok for us to use wheelchairs? They are a mobility aid. Ive worked at pools that wouldn't let my mertender carry me due to slip hazards so put me in their wheelchair, and hospitals prefer us using their wheelchairs when visiting children... I'm really praying it all blows over because I'm terrible at handling the anxiety associated with this kind of drama! I left a statement on my mermaid page and so far its been viewed 3000+ times so I'm hoping that'll appease most of the anger from people.

Honey the woman who's attacking you is a very angry soul. She is not emotionally well as a result of her condition and feels that EVERYONE ELSE needs to feel the same way.

take some breaths, it's not you it's her

[MermaidMerida]

So... why is it that it feels like theres no place in the mer community for those who just wanna swim in a tail and have fun and be social and be a mermaid? I keep coming up against people who wanna institute "training regimes" and stuff and its honestly really starting to break my heart because I've wanted to be a mer for YEARS but I have no interest in training or working out or anything.... ugh I just feel like theres no place for me here....

[Dancing Fish]

MermaidMerida, I get that feeling sometimes...but if I think of it this way, probably there's tons of us on mernet who aren't doing this professionally, who just want to have fun in tails. But there's not a lot for us to talk about on here, since we're not (at least in my case) instituting schools or doing mermaid gigs or worrying about underwater hair/makeup and photo shoots and pool bans affecting our livelihood. So the higher proportion of new threads go to those issues. And we're just in the background saying, "yay, I wore my tail again today!" and thinking that's not really worth a new post.

Maybe we need our own thread for just that? Nonprofessional mermaids just goofing off? "Show us your average daily swim!" Fortunately for us, I've never felt that there was any irritation over us "amateurs" hanging out here on mernetwork. Yes, I feel like the posting is done predominantly by professionals and up-and-coming professional mers, but I think there are far more lurkers who just hang out here without posting. Like me. If it weren't for the tailmaking threads, I doubt I'd have much to add at all!

[Ashe]

I completely understand. Sometimes I feel like the mer community has turned into one big competition. Like, who has the most expensive tail or who can become the most famous the fastest. I know that isn't always the case and we can usually tone that down here on MN, but I know that some people take it really far and it causes a lot of unneeded turmoil within the community

[Sabrina the Selkie]

I don't really get the sense that we're all that competitive. I think Dancing Fish hit the nail on the head.

Dancing Fish, you should make that thread. I think it will really help that portion of the community (which I am currently a member of, though I do hope to go pro eventually and I do work on my breath hold).

[PearlieMae]

Non-pro mers goofing off.

I'm down with that!

[Dancing Fish]

Done!

[Merman Dan]

So... why is it that it feels like theres no place in the mer community for those who just wanna swim in a tail and have fun and be social and be a mermaid?

How far are you from the Greensboro Aquatic Center?

[Sabrina the Selkie]

http://mernetwork.com/index/showthread.php?t=12776

Here is the link to the thread Dancing Fish started! ♡

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Anyway, unrelated stream of sadness.

My great grandfather (well, my great grandmother's widower, really) is utterly convinced that he will be dead within the next few days.

My mother and I are a little more optimistic: we give him MAYBE a month and a half.

She works in a retirement home, and as a single working parent she took me to work with her. So we've both seen a lot of death and can generally tell how long someone's gonna hold on. Something in the eyes, really. The last few years of life (when dying of old age, or else long lasting illness) are all about will power.

It's his time to go, that isn't really the problem.

The point of contention is this: because he thinks he's gonna be dead within the week and he really wants to die at home, he refuses to go to the hospital.

My mom and I think if he doesn't go, he really won't last the week and it will be excruciating. Whereas if he DOES go, he'll make it home with greater care and lots of pain meds, still die at home, but at least die comfortably in about a month.

Ultimately, it is his death and his choice, but neither of us want him to die in pain. So we are attempting to strong-arm him. He is proving very stubborn about this.

He DOES seem to be on the verge of agreeing with us and going to the hospital, at least...

[Mer-Crazy]

I, personally anyway, don't feel any real sense of competition on the site (and I'm a rather competitive person who tends to find it when there is none) although I do feel casual mermaids can sometimes be a little under-represented simply because we don't have all that much to talk about. But some of the bigger names on here aren't professional, Arion for one. He's just chilling, doing his own thing but most people know who he is because he engages a lot. I'm also just a casual mer and I just don't have that much to post or talk about. I offer advice or answers when I know them, but usually I don't so I don't say much. I'm also a bit of an introvert so whilst I read the threads that interest me, most don't and those that do I don't feel like I have anything significant to add, so I'm a bit more of a lurker.

[Merman Arion]

Some of the bigger names on here aren't professional, Arion for one. He's just chilling, doing his own thing but most people know who he is because he engages a lot.