B!TC# IT OUT!

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Originally Posted by Dacora

@goldie
THANK YOU! That is exactly it. I love my mom to death but jeez I just don't know why she goes bonkers like that sometimes. Then makes everyone out to be the bad guy and it drives me nuts. Dont get me wrong, I am thankful for her birthing me and putting a roof over my head but I cant stand it when she or any parent really, gets the feeling their child owes them everything beacuse they choose to raise the kid. There where other options the parent could have taken too. But they took on the kid, and apart of that is to give the kid a place to stay,give clothes and food. Why? Caz you choose to keep it.
Thats like adopting a dog and being mad when you have to care for it. If you didnt want to care for it in the first place Why adopt it?
But I never had a kid before so what do I know?



They do have they places to cash it but they normally charge you for it. I normally travel through the city to see my boyfriend and having a big sum of money on you is just asking for trouble.

I did once and she set me up with my old bank account and made it where I had no charges. But she had to go to a diffrent bank location. We think she was waving charges on my account since her and my mom are buds. But since she moved she can't anymore.

I figured she knew she was using my money, and the thing is if she asked me I would have given her money and she knows that, I just wish she would have let me buy what I needed first. Aslong as I have the money on the visa no one can use it unless I give them the card and the pen number. So I will probally use that until I find a steady job to have my own bank account.

This is not the first time stuff has happened over the years and its other things too. She has told me straight up that if she could take back the day I was conceived she would. I think she loves me but also resents me since I was not planned and ruined her party life when it just started. It's a huge strain on our relationship and its ruined the whole "loving mother and daughter" thing. Not to mention she wanted a boy then when she didnt get that she wanted me to be a pretty girly girl that wears dresses and make up. I also shat over that plan. Along with everything about me being totally diffrent than her. I turned out to be the polar opposite of the kid she wanted.

After 18 years of all of it its gotten to the point where I don't care if I'm the bad guy anymore. It does not bother me when she yells caz if its not one thing its another.

Ill hopefully be out on my own soon and I hope it will help out our relationship. I know we get along better when I take off to my boyfriends moms house and stay there with them from Saturday to Monday then come back. So maybe just being gone will fix it. Less room to bump heads I guess.

What a great topic for mothers day. Its kinda funny, I wanted to take her out to eat but I cant now. Caz im broke. XD

P.S My phone is a jerk and is autocorecting words into things that dont make sense. So im sorry if this is a huge wall of typos.

@ mermaidandrea
Ah yes the "no I dont wanna go out anymore" bit. I would still take her out, but I wouldn't blame you if you didnt.

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Wow....

It seems the hospital in Frederick does not have a special diet for diabetics.

My husband's grandfather is in the hospital because he'd fallen pretty badly. They're giving him regular food with normal pie and everything. How can a hospital of all places, one that supposedly has a diabetes center, allow diabetic inpatients sugary food?? It's not like they never get elderly diabetic patients there, after all.

Is this normal? I find this to be unacceptable.

It's unacceptable.

Can I just say, 'UGH!'

I spent ALL DAY searching for neoprene in-store today, and called ALL OVER the place looking for it, but was eventually unsuccessful. So, I end up having to just go to the internet. So, I go to several websites before deciding on Rockywoods, since their prices seem to be the most reasonable, and their stock seemed nice.

Every sheet of neoprene I tried to buy in a light color like "buttercup" or "cool white" is apparently unavailable. When I went to check out, card in-hand with 7feet of the buttercup color in 2mm B type foam, I go all the way through the checkout process only to get a notification that I could not buy the amount I'd need. I sigh, to all the way back through the process and try to find any other possible color, all of which appeared "unavailable."

Now, I'm about to have to settle for black which will be a pain, but doable. I'll now just have to completely change the color of my neoprene sheet and hope the paint will be able to withstand it.

FRUSTRATIIIING!

Edit:
Now, apparently, black isn't in sufficient quantity. :|
This is flipping ridiculous.

Edit 2: Aaand a sheet of white is magically back in stock. >:V

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Originally Posted by Mermaid Nerinae

Can I just say, 'UGH!'

I spent ALL DAY searching for neoprene in-store today, and called ALL OVER the place looking for it, but was eventually unsuccessful. So, I end up having to just go to the internet. So, I go to several websites before deciding on Rockywoods, since their prices seem to be the most reasonable, and their stock seemed nice.

Every sheet of neoprene I tried to buy in a light color like "buttercup" or "cool white" is apparently unavailable. When I went to check out, card in-hand with 7feet of the buttercup color in 2mm B type foam, I go all the way through the checkout process only to get a notification that I could not buy the amount I'd need. I sigh, to all the way back through the process and try to find any other possible color, all of which appeared "unavailable."

Now, I'm about to have to settle for black which will be a pain, but doable. I'll now just have to completely change the color of my neoprene sheet and hope the paint will be able to withstand it.

FRUSTRATIIIING!

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Oh I feel your pain! But there is a solution.... Call Alan Buhtz, product consultant at FoamOrder.com at 415-503-1133 . He has been just wonderful in answering all my questions. Not only does he have black neoprene, but also white. The nylon colors I was looking at are Beige, Ivory, and brown. If Beige is on black neoprene its more my skin tone, if I put beige on white, its more yellow. You have to get samples to see what you really want. Some nylon colors don't come on white, as that's a new neoprene just coming in. So ask lots of questions, order the free samples in all the thicknesses and colors you think you might want. You can Email Alan at <product-info@foamorder.com> I would go to FoamOrder.com and see the neoprene sample color chart. I know they may be slightly different than your monitor displays but it will be close.

Good luck!
Mermaid Marla

P.S. In my research I thought Foam Order had the best prices, and best of all, it's in stock.

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Originally Posted by MerMarla

Oh I feel your pain! But there is a solution.... Call Alan Buhtz, product consultant at FoamOrder.com at 415-503-1133 . He has been just wonderful in answering all my questions. Not only does he have black neoprene, but also white. The nylon colors I was looking at are Beige, Ivory, and brown. If Beige is on black neoprene its more my skin tone, if I put beige on white, its more yellow. You have to get samples to see what you really want. Some nylon colors don't come on white, as that's a new neoprene just coming in. So ask lots of questions, order the free samples in all the thicknesses and colors you think you might want. You can Email Alan at <product-info@foamorder.com> I would go to FoamOrder.com and see the neoprene sample color chart. I know they may be slightly different than your monitor displays but it will be close.

Good luck!
Mermaid Marla

P.S. In my research I thought Foam Order had the best prices, and best of all, it's in stock.

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Thanks Marla. Unfortunately I've already made the purchase XD
In my frustration, I managed to get the full sheet of white which will be good for what I'm trying to do (lionfish). It cost me 90 bucks, but fortunately I had the money to spare since my husband's family has this thing about throwing money at me for my birthday. I'll definitely keep Foam Order in mind for my next neoprene purchase though, that's for sure!

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Originally Posted by Mermaid Nerinae

Thanks Marla. Unfortunately I've already made the purchase XD
In my frustration, I managed to get the full sheet of white which will be good for what I'm trying to do (lionfish). It cost me 90 bucks, but fortunately I had the money to spare since my husband's family has this thing about throwing money at me for my birthday. I'll definitely keep Foam Order in mind for my next neoprene purchase though, that's for sure!

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Aww, ok, are you sure you can't cancel the order? You just placed it, and they have customer support ppl on phones. I think Foam Order was like less than $60 for a sheet of Neoprene, but don't quote me! LOL! For $30 savings, I would try. Then you could get the color you REALLY wanted!

Good luck!
Mermaid Marla

P.S. And.... and.... you might be able to get white on white neoprene! That would really make your Lionfish POP! Oooooh! its gonna be beautiful any how!

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Originally Posted by MerMarla

Aww, ok, are you sure you can't cancel the order? You just placed it, and they have customer support ppl on phones. I think Foam Order was like less than $60 for a sheet of Neoprene, but don't quote me! LOL! For $30 savings, I would try. Then you could get the color you REALLY wanted!

Good luck!
Mermaid Marla

P.S. And.... and.... you might be able to get white on white neoprene! That would really make your Lionfish POP! Oooooh! its gonna be beautiful any how!

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I'm actually trying to call them right now and cancel the order, but their office is closed right now and uuugh. So I have to leave them a message and hope they get back to me in the morning. Poopy. I'm looking at Foam Order right now and, yeah, I'd DEFINITELY want to save the extra $30, haha! That's more paints and supplies I could be getting!

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Originally Posted by Mermaid Nerinae

I'm actually trying to call them right now and cancel the order, but their office is closed right now and uuugh. So I have to leave them a message and hope they get back to me in the morning. Poopy. I'm looking at Foam Order right now and, yeah, I'd DEFINITELY want to save the extra $30, haha! That's more paints and supplies I could be getting!

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Oh, figures! I hope you can leave a message and that they get back to you tomorrow right away. Your bucking the Memorial Day fever of companies closing for the long weekend. So I hope they are open at least until noon.

I can't wait for you to post your drawings for your tail... if you did, I probably missed them. I am still hunting and pecking my way around this site!

Good luck! I know Alan can help you out! He's great to talk to!
Nite, nite!
Mermaid Marla

Yeah, hopefully the accounting office still gets my message. What a headache, otherwise.
I have, actually, posted drawings for my tail on my project thread, but I'm changing up the fluke shape a bit and some of the painting pattern (wanna include a little more blacks in the fluke) but the basic idea is still the same.

http://mernetwork.com/index/attachme...4&d=1366108767

I'd be very upset if they try and charge me a fee for cancelling the order, when it was literally just moments after I made the purchase, because they are away from the office for Memorial Day weekend. Hopefully it all works out, and I'll definitely be giving Alan a call :>

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Originally Posted by Mermaid Nerinae

Yeah, hopefully the accounting office still gets my message. What a headache, otherwise.
I have, actually, posted drawings for my tail on my project thread, but I'm changing up the fluke shape a bit and some of the painting pattern (wanna include a little more blacks in the fluke) but the basic idea is still the same.

I'd be very upset if they try and charge me a fee for cancelling the order, when it was literally just moments after I made the purchase, because they are away from the office for Memorial Day weekend. Hopefully it all works out, and I'll definitely be giving Alan a call :>

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Mermaid Nerinae,
How did things work out? Did you get your order cancelled? Did you call Alan? I love the drawings! What did you change your fluke shape to look like? I am still fretting on what color to get, beige on white or beige on black... I am leaning on the black neoprene with beige on both sides... now to determine thickness! Too many decisions, and I have that "analysis paralysis" indecision thing going on.

Hope all went well, please let me know how you faired!
Mermaid Marla

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Originally Posted by MerMarla

Mermaid Nerinae,
How did things work out? Did you get your order cancelled? Did you call Alan? I love the drawings! What did you change your fluke shape to look like? I am still fretting on what color to get, beige on white or beige on black... I am leaning on the black neoprene with beige on both sides... now to determine thickness! Too many decisions, and I have that "analysis paralysis" indecision thing going on.

Hope all went well, please let me know how you faired!
Mermaid Marla

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Weeell, I got the order cancelled, but the charge still hasn't dropped from my account. It may take another day or so, since it was over Memorial Day weekend but after it goes back on I'll be calling Alan and getting information from him on ordering some neoprene. I'll probably consider getting the beige or natural color on black neoprene. I'm going to use 1.5mm. It's the nice halfway point between 1 and 3. I figure it'll also make sewing easier (if I end up having to sew most of it) when it's stacked because 3mm will be SUPER thick when sewing. D:

As far as the fluke shape, it was going to be sort of a whale-esque shaped fin with some longer ends, just so it looks a little more flowy. :>

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Originally Posted by Mermaid Nerinae

Weeell, I got the order cancelled, but the charge still hasn't dropped from my account. It may take another day or so, since it was over Memorial Day weekend but after it goes back on I'll be calling Alan and getting information from him on ordering some neoprene. I'll probably consider getting the beige or natural color on black neoprene. I'm going to use 1.5mm. It's the nice halfway point between 1 and 3. I figure it'll also make sewing easier (if I end up having to sew most of it) when it's stacked because 3mm will be SUPER thick when sewing. D:

As far as the fluke shape, it was going to be sort of a whale-esque shaped fin with some longer ends, just so it looks a little more flowy. :>

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Oh! Mermaid Nerinea, This is great news! I do know that it's Murphy's Law working overtime! LOL! Anytime you want something right away, there are at least 5 things in the way that complicate matters! I'm glad you got the order cancelled. That was the first step, and the biggy.

I also decided to use the 1.5 mm, but beige on black (beige on back side, too). First I am making a skinsuit jacket. The gym I belong to just filled the outdoor pool and its a mite cold yet. I wish neoprene came in 1.0 mm, but I have yet to find it. So 1.5 will suffice. I was concerned with too much buoyancy, and having put on too much weight (30 lbs over the last 2 years) I float way to easy. So the neoprene was a question in my mind. I kept remembering my old wetsuit, that was 1/4 inch farmer john and 1/4 jacket over that... and I needed a huge amount of weight to get down. Then had to use the compensator to balance out the extra weight.

In my previous life at Weeki, we only used our lungs to adjust our neutrality in the water. I almost can't do that anymore because of the extra "love handles" I grew :(. So I will have to design a weight belt, or maybe line my tail eventually with small fishing weights, or similar, maybe curtain weights, dunno. I don't think you can get lead "shot" or fishing weights anymore because its toxic to rivers and fish if they swallow it off a fishing line.

I love the whale-shaped fluke. One of our Massachusetts vanity plates has a Right Whale tail/fluke on it! I may trace it out and use it. Or a Beluga, my favorite whale! Haven't really thought that far in advance. I am working on losing my 30 lbs first! LOL!

Hope all goes well for you! Glad I could help somewhat! Keep me posted if you have time!
(((Hugz))) & Bubble https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/e/B0C'z
Mermaid Marla

Ok...still kind of upset so please excuse the language that is about to ensue.

I was in alabama with my boyfriend (his job travels and since I had no job I planned on staying there for a few years at most) but I got a job that I couldn't turn down and had to move back to Michigan. I flew and since it was such a small plane, I couldn't bring my dog with me. I was nervous about leaving my dog with him because for 10 months of her life, she had NEVER been away from me for a single night. Everything went ok. But last night that asshole called me and told me that she ate the middle of a metal pop can.
Now...let me explain....the middle is not the tab, as most of his family assumed (dumbasses) the middle is the middle! the part between the silver top and silver bottom, USUALLY the part that has the label on it....he said that he was playing cards in the garage (so they can smoke) and he came in and found her on the floor chewing on the metal top. he scolded her and threw the leftovers away then looked around and didn't find any other pieces around. So she ate it. He then told me and I got pissed. I asked "where were you?" he answered in the garage playing cards. "why wasn't she with you?" his response : idk. so I told him that he needed to take her to the vet. he came back with "Oh she will be fine. Mike's dog ate 20 christmas light bulbs and survived." SHE WILL BE FINE??!!! REALLY? besides the point Mike's dog is a Malmute. My dog is a small 40lb black and tan coonhound. I hung up because I was about to say somethings that would damage our relationship.

I can't exactly do anything about it because I don't have the money to drive down 13hrs, get my dog, and drive all the way back. But I am so mad! We have been together for 3 1/2 years. I love this kid, yes, he did something horrible but I can't help but love him. But seriously? I am so pissed. He loves the dog too, but its like I have to do everything. I asked where she got the pop can. (My dog isn't big enough to get on counters or table) He said he didnt know where she had gotten it from. And that made me madder. Its him and his cousin down there right now....so SOMEONE had to have drank the pop and left the can on the floor or on the end table next to the couch. But seriously? No one knows where she got it from? So I basically told him that maybe I shouldn't have taken this job because obviously someone needs to babysit the dog and them to make sure that the house is picked up and that the dog doesn't eat things they leave out. I'm so mad!!!! and upset because EVERYONE (him, his cousin, his cousin's fiance, his aunts uncles sister), are all telling me "she will be fine, my dog did this....".

Just so everyone is aware; no I will not break up with him, so please don't let that be your answer. I basically came up with two descisions in my mind. 1) if she does happen to die because of this, we are NEVER getting another pet. Because obviously I will have to be the person to take care of it which means that I can't travel with the pirate festival because I will have to find accommodations with my dog. and 2) I am considering getting a IUD as means of birth control because it lasts 3-5 years. I honestly don't want kids because he wouldn't/can't take responsibility. That is a far off decision but I am actually considering telling him that I don't think we can have them because he can't be responsible with a dog...what would happen with a kid??

Ok now that I said that last part...I do love him...we are going to get married. I do believe that if two people agree that they can get married and CHOOSE not to have kids that is fine. My aunt and Uncle did the same thing. They had nieces and nephews to care for. But I will not like any answer that says "break it off" blah blah blah. cus trust me some of his family his friends and mine as well have told me before "why be with him if your considering not having kids?" so please be careful with what you say ( I know its your opinion but at least take that into consideration that I would like helpful suggestions as far as what to do with my dog...or other things like that)

Thank you for reading this and reading myself repeat things over...but its hard for me. as I said I am in MI and he's in AL and I can't do anything on my end here.

Oh, Adella, I'm so sorry to hear about your dog!! That's really serious! Is there any way you can convince him to take her to the vet? :(

As for the options you listed: from his behavior I would definitely agree he is not ready to be taking care of pets OR children. It's not just that he let your dog eat the shard of metal, he also is refusing to take action about it and is pretending it's fine. If he had swooped in and rushed her to the vet, then that would to some degree balance out his negligence, but the fact that instead he's choosing to not do anything as a way to not accept responsibility... To me that's what makes him not ready to be the primary care for the life of others :(

Are kids something you and he have always wanted? I think it's definitely not the time to have them now, and you could go through with your IUD plan if you're comfortable with it, since after the 3-5 years you can reassess whether it's something you're ready for. If he planned children to be a part of his future, maybe this will shake him up enough to pull his act together--and keep it there.

*hugs* I'm so sorry you have to go through this! Let us know how your sweet dog does :(

boo to medications that solve one problem but create another! *falls over*

(Sorry if it's been said before... A lot of pages to go through)

I hate it when you have to CONSTANTLY remind someone that they have responsibilities and need to get them done and all they say is "Augh, I know" Or when you ask them if they are going to do something and they just go "Yeah" all non-committal. I sometimes fall under the "I know" but that's usually because they ask me during a time frame that I can't do it. (IE call a company that's closed for the day because I had OTHER responsibilities to take care of)

I've worked (just recently lost this job) at a grocery store as a "bagger" and I absolutely F**king HATE it when people treat me like I'm some stupid, ignorant piece of s#!t that won't amount to anything in my life because I'm obviously stupid, otherwise WHY would I be working this job? Then they get all "ERMAHGAWD" when I say something that is highly educated and insightful. I ALSO hate it when my BOSS treats me like I'm a dumbass and don't know shit about doing my job when I've been doing it CORRECTLY for months on end. -.- WTF...

The stupidity thing gets me the most though... it just UGH I WANNA SQUISH BABIES. Okay, maybe not really... But for someone who is a GATE (Gifted And Talented Education) student, a member of the (USA) National Society of Highschool Scholars, and an honors student, it is HIGHLY degrading... I just UGH... A lot of the time I think it's because I look 16 or 17 (I'm 23, 24 in June) and usually don't wear make-up and I'm a GIRL so, that adds up to me being stupid. It just... ARUGH. Or even when I'm at the tidepools educating other people on the marine life and the volunteer person comes up to me and starts explaining everything I had just been telling someone else within earshot. -.- Really? Just because I'm in a bikini doesn't mean I'm a bimbo.

Then there's the mermaid "talk". The "Why would you waste your money on a tail" and then proceed to tell me the MILLIONS of reasons why being a mermaid is a BAD idea and why I shouldn't pursue it. That goes for acting too. I get the "There are thousands of girls JUST LIKE YOU trying to do the EXACT SAME THING." I'm sorry, but no. There aren't thousands of girls JUST LIKE ME out there, otherwise I think I'd notice. And yeah, I know it's a tough field, but I don't care. I want to do it. Just because I don't work a 9-5 job doesn't mean that I'm a worse person than you. You want to pursue business? Go ahead! I support you that's awesome. Nursing? Fantastic! You're helping people! Pro-wrestler? Dude, you're getting exercise and a check, nice!

Just augh... I guess older people who don't support the new ways the younger generation has to make money in this f**cked up time. ><

End rant... PHEW glad to get that out there. I'll post again when more comes to mind. haha Wow, that felt great.

Adella! Oh my gosh!

I've worked in a vet's and yes, dogs do eat quite a bit of crazy things and survive! Cats, too, for that matter. But a metal soda pop can is terrible! I'm assuming (s)he chewed it up quite a bit, which means that it could be in small pieces. Now, this can be good, and it can be bad... If it gets "surrounded" by food and other things they can pass with little to no harm to her. If they don't... well... Perforation happens and that can only be fixed with surgery... Sometimes.

I really, really hope that she is okay. I have had lots of pets in my life and have held them very dear. If he doesn't want to take her to the vet, tell him to get mineral oil and either add that to her food or flush her system with that. It won't harm her, it will just help lubricate the pieces. But best of all, you should definitely press him to go take her for an X-Ray. That way, the vet can determine whether or not the pieces can pass safely.

Coon hounds are a wonderful breed, albeit, rare. Hounds don't handle things the way malamutes and other large dogs do. :< He needs to understand that. <3 Best of luck to you, hun. I'll keep both of you in my prayers.


As for the not having kids - Talk to him first. Very seriously talk to him about it. Don't cut corners and don't sugar coat it. I know you love him and I won't tell you to break up, but having children is a decision made by BOTH partners in a relationship. I don't want to see you damage anything by making a decision firmly then not really discuss it. If that makes sense. <3 Hope things work out, love.

Oh my god. One thing that annoys me beyond most things is when people try to talk you out of following your dreams and taking risks because of "slim chances" or "what ifs." Obviously some do or we wouldn't have examples of people who made it. I'd be happier now if I didn't listen to them early on.

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Originally Posted by Kakarotte

Oh my god. One thing that annoys me beyond most things is when people try to talk you out of following your dreams and taking risks because of "slim chances" or "what ifs." Obviously some do or we wouldn't have examples of people who made it. I'd be happier now if I didn't listen to them early on.

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Hear, hear! (or is it Here, here!) *raises glass*

Oh my god, same situation here. Absolute story of my life... -__-

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Originally Posted by Kailani

Adella! Oh my gosh!

I've worked in a vet's and yes, dogs do eat quite a bit of crazy things and survive! Cats, too, for that matter. But a metal soda pop can is terrible! I'm assuming (s)he chewed it up quite a bit, which means that it could be in small pieces. Now, this can be good, and it can be bad... If it gets "surrounded" by food and other things they can pass with little to no harm to her. If they don't... well... Perforation happens and that can only be fixed with surgery... Sometimes.

I really, really hope that she is okay. I have had lots of pets in my life and have held them very dear. If he doesn't want to take her to the vet, tell him to get mineral oil and either add that to her food or flush her system with that. It won't harm her, it will just help lubricate the pieces. But best of all, you should definitely press him to go take her for an X-Ray. That way, the vet can determine whether or not the pieces can pass safely.

Coon hounds are a wonderful breed, albeit, rare. Hounds don't handle things the way malamutes and other large dogs do. :< He needs to understand that. <3 Best of luck to you, hun. I'll keep both of you in my prayers.


As for the not having kids - Talk to him first. Very seriously talk to him about it. Don't cut corners and don't sugar coat it. I know you love him and I won't tell you to break up, but having children is a decision made by BOTH partners in a relationship. I don't want to see you damage anything by making a decision firmly then not really discuss it. If that makes sense. <3 Hope things work out, love.

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Thanks for the good advice :) I guess she is doing fine. Whenever she does chew on something it always ends up in tiny TINY pieces. He's been feeding her bread pieces I guess. I basically did tell him he couldn't handle kids because he couldn't watch a year old dog, and he didn't like me saying that but I had to say it. We have a long time before we will actually have kids so he could turn around but I basically had to say my peace. He did understand and he is trying to cheer me up and all that; he will text me sweet things and let me know how my dog is doing. So far she is fine. I told him that the only way to make sure that she passes it is to watch her poop for shards and things. Thanks everyone for their suggestions and sympathies.

I knew that animals always tended to eat odd and strange things. And I'm glad that someone understands that coon hounds and malmutes can digest different things in different ways. I am shocked that it seems black n tan coonhounds are "rare". I never would have guessed that.

In laws...im so fing sick of in laws..cabt they just leave us a lone for a few days? Granted my fiance is a mommas boy but good grief I had my rents off my back by the time i was 18..plus his mother is a psychopath good grief it really boils my gills!

Vent:

Why.....WHY do people languish around in shitty goddamned stupid idiotic abusive relationships? I have a friend whose girlfriend forbids him from hanging out with friends, has cheated on him, controls his FB, goes through his phone daily, but he's still giving her "one more chance" and that he's "settled" for now. Why do humans allow this?

Dear people coming into the bulding- that's a fecking bedroom window and it's 11pm. STFU and keep walking. Morons, inconsiderate DOLTS.

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Originally Posted by Kakarotte

Vent:

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Originally Posted by Kakarotte

Why.....WHY do people languish around in shitty goddamned stupid idiotic abusive relationships? I have a friend whose girlfriend forbids him from hanging out with friends, has cheated on him, controls his FB, goes through his phone daily, but he's still giving her "one more chance" and that he's "settled" for now. Why do humans allow this?

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that's their relationship. you should probably stay out of it and concern yourself w/ your own man and his fb acct. If they are in a relationship or married why are you still clinging on to him :rolleyes: Fix what's wrong in your bedroom instead of peering in windows of other folk's br across town!
That is my vent... ishes who are all up in your relationship with the excuse that they're looking out for your man for you . :lol:
have gun will deal with you... so get a life or lose the excuse of a life you have... your choice.

This is kind of a strange pet peeve, but I get annoyed by people who hate people. Weird, right?

The other night I was visiting my best friend and my gay "friend" at his house, and at one point we were talking about how some punks broke into his car and stole his stereo system, and he was just ranting away about it. I mean, I can understand getting seriously upset about stuff like that, but he seems to have lost all hope in humanity and swears that he hates EVERYONE (except for me and his other friends of course) and would like for them to all burn in hell. o_o

I'm just sitting there like, um, okay then. Sh-t happens, sometimes people are idiots and jerks and what have you, but what are you going to gain from going around being the ultimate pessimist your whole life? Never expecting anything from the worst from people? You're just going to be lonely and miserable and cranky for the rest of your days. Now, I've been called "innocent" and "naive" on more than one occasion, but I'd rather be childish and optimistic than jaded and pessimistic. I figure I'll go a lot farther and be a lot happier in life, so yeah, it kind of pisses me off when I come across these people who are just like "omg I hate everyone argh" and put a damper on the mood. Seriously, they just ruin it for everyone. Just put on a smile and move on instead of dwelling on the bad parts of humanity.

Besides, the best way to deal with angry/mean/rude people is to annoy them with your happiness. XD
I like to take cues from my grandma. One time there was a car tailgating her, and there was only one lane so nowhere for her or him to move. He was getting pissed off, swerving behind her, etc. etc. When eventually there were two lanes and he passed her, he was glaring at us, but she just smiled and waved at him, lol. Also, apparently she's had people break into her car a lot to steal her groceries, even breaking her windows to get in; she doesn't live in the greatest part of town. But even so, she doesn't seem to get mad or hateful. Instead, she's said to me "well, I just leave the car doors unlocked now because I don't want them breaking my windows. They probably need the food more than me, so even though it's annoying because I have to make another trip to the grocery store, I try to not let it bring me down."

I think that this is such a great, positive attitude to have, and I really admire my grandma for it. It's not easy to be forgiving, but I think that it's worth it in the end. You might get taken advantage of, sure, but people will be people. It's best to just not let them affect you too much. After all, there's nothing you can do about it, right? So what's the point in screaming and throwing a tantrum? Just smile, wave, and move on. Keep your heart light and your glasses rose-coloured. Just keep swimming, right?

So yup, that's my rant. I don't like people who always ignore the silver lining and prefer to preach hate and anger and revenge. I can't say that I always do it, because like I said, it's hard... but more often than not, I'll try to kill them with kindness instead. :)

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have gun will deal with you

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Looks like someone got their MerNetwork and 4chan accounts mixed up.

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Originally Posted by merline

that's their relationship. you should probably stay out of it and concern yourself w/ your own man and his fb acct. If they are in a relationship or married why are you still clinging on to him :rolleyes: Fix what's wrong in your bedroom instead of peering in windows of other folk's br across town!
That is my vent... ishes who are all up in your relationship with the excuse that they're looking out for your man for you . :lol:
have gun will deal with you... so get a life or lose the excuse of a life you have... your choice.

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1) go back to 4chan

2) you should sort you sh!t out before telling other people what to do. Stop being a douche and I seriously suggest not threatening people with GUNS or people like me will go apeshit at you, cause we don't let that stuff fly on here.

3) Fix your own bedroom issues. Sounds like your own insecurities are clouding how you see others.

4) Unlike you seem to do, you will notice that Kakarotte is caring about the safety and well-being of a friend, something that any decent human being does. She at no point said or hinted at being jealous, just that she couldn't understand why her friend was staying in the situation. You are the only one who said that sort of thing, so again - perhaps this is a reflection of your own insecurities.

Well, since there's a screencap of this, I will point out the following:

1) The Internet isn't anonymous.

2) Death threats are extremely illegal. Even over the Internet.

3) Forum rules are clearly posted for every soul to read.

4) She did something highly illegal and against forum policy, and she had to fill out personal information to join this forum.


I swear, some kids don't think these days. You can't just go anywhere on the net and take out your hostilities on other Internet users. Your IP address and login history basically says, "I broke the law."

Kakarote I dont know you so I was not threatening you personally. I dealt with one female who did stalk my ex and said the exact same things to him. "oh you should hang out with old gfs again" "Oh you should not let her have control of you fb acct" He liked staying home I never prohibited anything and since we were married I did not think he should be writing other women. So yes I do think your meddling attitude is inappropriate and Yes I do intend to deal with it head on next time I confront it. Not a threat to you personally because I do not know you but yes I DO think it is inappropriate to be meddling in another couple's relationship. This man probably LIKES being with his mate and doesnt feel like hanging out with old females he used to know... it is called trying to be faithful. I dont know what a 4 chan acct is. So my pet peeve is meddling people i do think it is inappropriate to meddle in the relationships of others. You are assuming he is being forced to be with her. My thought is he would not be there if he didnt like it... accept that and move on with your life.

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Originally Posted by merline

Kakarote I dont know you so I was not threatening you personally.

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may I refer you to this line:

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Originally Posted by merline

have gun will deal with you... so get a life or lose the excuse of a life you have... your choice.

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<- This is directed to kakarotte (you even quoted her above your threat), and not only totally out of line to say to a young woman whether you know her personally or not.

also for example florida state law says.... "anyone who writes or composes and also sends or procures the sending of any letter, inscribed communication, or electric communication that threatens to kill or do bodily harm to someone commits a felony in the second degree. The letter or other form of communication can be signed by the composer or anonymous. The threat to kill or do bodily harm does not have to be directed at the recipient of the letter." http://www.ehow.com/list_7433231_law...s-florida.html

as someone who has been married, this suggests that you are of a slightly older ages and as the majority of members on here are very young women, some of which are still Minors, this is TOTALLY rediculous for you to say EVEN if you say you didn't mean it or intend to direct it at kakarotte specifically. Re-read your post from the point of view of someone who can't see your thought patterns, and is possibly young and vunerable.

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Originally Posted by merline

I dealt with one female who did stalk my ex and said the exact same things to him.

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yes but not everyone should immediately be branded a stalker by you and treated 'as such' by you. Kakarotte sounds like someone genuinely concerned, not obsessed or stalking. She wants to still see her friend. Doesn't mean she wants him for herself *rolls her eyes*

And I will say this next bit for the benefit of both you and kakarotte seeing as kakarotte was struggling to understand why someone would stay in an abusive situation:

I have been in abusive situations myself. I have watched my Mum deal with my dad and his mental abuse. Abusers tend to be controlling, restrict freedom, put victims down and make them believe they deserve it, they say sorry and then do it again - they're often charming and persuasive at first and can convince the victim to stay through that, also people are fools in love. They stay and give people more chances than they deserve and even I am currently guilty of that as my husband has cheated on me online repeatedly over the last year. But having fought for 7 years to be together, it's not something that I am going to instantly throw away. A great deal of money and emotion has been invested in my relationship but I'm not a fool, I know I shouldn't put up with this because it will 'just happen again' but I still stay because I have my own reasons - perhaps Kakarotte's friend has his too, he just needs to know that no matter what he has a friend there looking out for him.

So yeah, I can see things from both points of view but Merline, you are way out of line to state things the way you have done.

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Originally Posted by merline

since we were married I did not think he should be writing other women. So yes I do think your meddling attitude is inappropriate

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ummm... I think everyone has this thing called human rights where they can talk to anyone they want to? I don't see much distinction between being FRIENDS with a woman or a man. My two best friends are a 42 y/o man and a trans guy who is a year or two younger than me. And my husband's best friends are either gay guys or girls, because that is just who he gets on with the best. And I stand by that even after he has cheated on me. So no, I don't think it's meddling, I think it's being a concerned friend venting frustration on a neutral forum. Just like I'm being a concerned friend defending a fellow member.

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Originally Posted by merline

This man probably LIKES being with his mate and doesnt feel like hanging out with old females he used to know... it is called trying to be faithful.

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I will refer you back to my statement about why people stay in abusive situations. Yes he may 'like' being with her but that doesn't mean he's not in an abusive situation that he is 'putting up with' when he shouldn't neccessarily be. And kakarotte never said that her friend didn't want to see her anymore, she said that the girlfriend had told him not to be in contact with others. Classic control-freak abuser tactic there btw. Something that you seem to say you demanded in your own relationship... that's quite telling ya'know?

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Originally Posted by merline

You are assuming he is being forced to be with her. My thought is he would not be there if he didn't like it... accept that and move on with your life.

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And you are assuming that he isn't being abused, which basically does force people to stay until they get the strength to leave. And again I refer you to my explanation of why people stay in abusive situations. You saying 'he would not be there if he didn't like it'... well I can tell you've never been in an abusive relationship. Well, at least as the victim anyway *rolls her eyes*.

P.S. Learn to type/spell.

Might I add: my friend DESPERATELY wants to hang out with his old female friends and is terribly lonely now. Not for sex, not to cheat, but because he still loves those people as friends. 95% of all his friends are female. Now he has to sneak around behind her back just to talk to his old friends at all. It's taken an enormous toll on him. That's part of why he contacted me over the whole ordeal in the first place and vented for an hour and 5 minutes. He wants the strength to leave, but doesn't have it yet. I'm married too. My husband and I have numerous friends of the opposite sex that we hang out with individually. We don't go through each other's phones or know each other's passwords for anything. Because we trust each other. I'm fucking awesome and so is he. There's no need to suspect cheating. Virtually all of my friends' relationships are like that, 'cause that's healthy.

my statement was addressed to the next meddler who enters my life. Interesting the concept of your "right" to meddle with men who are in relationships is so important to you ... :lol:
Kakarrote, I think you should tell them to go to couple's counseling and let them sort it out on their own. There are professionals for that.

Each time I got married, I left other men and their problems behind. I concerned myself with my spouse and his problems from that point on. One person's view of healthy is another person's view of hell, decadence, skankiness, etc. There are various socio-cultural variables to consider so there are no rules that all must adhere to. What works for one is not one size fits all.. Just let them sort it out.
PS Karkarrote, I wish you the best. When I got married last time, one of my ex male friends continued to call me and tell me how bad things were with him and his gf and begged to see me. I refused. I could see through it that he wanted to BE with me again and wanted to put me in a position to cheat so I cut things off with him very decisively. Many do not and that is why marriages last 2 years tops these days. Each person must deal with this the way that suits them best and deal with the consequences that will follow.

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Originally Posted by merline

my statement was addressed to the next meddler who enters my life. Interesting the concept of your "right" to meddle with men who are in relationships is so important to you ... :lol:
Kakarrote, I think you should tell them to go to couple's counseling and let them sort it out on their own. There are professionals for that.

Each time I got married, I left other men and their problems behind. I concerned myself with my spouse and his problems from that point on. One person's view of healthy is another person's view of hell, decadence, skankiness, etc. There are various socio-cultural variables to consider so there are no rules that all must adhere to. What works for one is not one size fits all.. Just let them sort it out.

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again with the idea that she's 'meddling' what the hell. Did you even read what she and I have posted? :doh:

You at no point in your original post stated that it was for 'the next meddler' and the context of the original post, and the tone of the over-all post, most certainly made the comment a threat towards kakarotte to those who didn't know your apparent intentions. Maybe you should learn how to write properly next time you want to post a statement like that. Plus do remember that posting online does constitute a written threat.

I really do feel sorry for 'your men' if you control them like you seem to do and accuse any female friend of theirs as being a 'meddler'. :crazy:

I think your view of meddling is VERY skewed but that's just my opinion I guess. And you're allowed your own opinion, but when you use your opinion to attack others who are just venting in what is supposed to be a safe and neutral thread, that's wrong.

And as someone who is very familiar with D/S and BDSM and have been for about 10 years, I get what you're trying to say but if you actually read what kakarotte explained, that does not apply to this situation.

I like how you tried to use long words to avoid the fact that you've totally ignored every single point me and kakarotte have made/put to you. *rolls her eyes*
I could add in plenty of 'impressive' words to prove my point, but I don't need to :lol:

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Originally Posted by merline

my statement was addressed to the next meddler who enters my life.

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Then you're a really immature person.

Stop trying to wiggle yourself out.
You came here and dropped a damn death threat.
You probably feel secure because you think "oh, internet, anonymity trololo".
Well, let me tell you: you are NEVER untraceable.
Just because you made yourself a new account here doesn't mean people don't know who you are.

You should:
1) get a grip
2) grow up
3) stop making yourself new accounts here each time you get banned, if stuff like this is all you have to say.

"Just because you made yourself a new account here doesn't mean people don't know who you are."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ENLIGHTEN ME, Caltuna! THE PLOT HAS THICKENED!!!!

http://forum-img.pinside.com/pinball...t=92381&inline

I dont know what d/s is Kat Arnold. You are injecting things that refer to you that I don't even know of. I never meant to offend anyone. I totally meant that you should leave people's relationships to them to sort out period. That is just my opinion. I have been a seductress and I have also been a faithful married woman. So I do see both sides of this argument. Single skanks will always feel they have a right to slide on whatever man they want. And married women will always feel that skanks are disease infested scum. Cheating men will always USE the scanks for a moment and cast them aside. So it is what it is.

PS I have never had an acct here before nor another one. And yes skanks can be either married or single.

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Originally Posted by merline

I dont know what d/s is Kat Arnold. You are injecting things that refer to you that I don't even know of. I never meant to offend anyone. I totally meant that you should leave people's relationships to them to sort out period. That is just my opinion. I have been a seductress and I have also been a faithful married woman. So I do see both sides of this argument. Single skanks will always feel they have a right to slide on whatever man they want. And married women will always feel that skanks are disease infested scum. Cheating men will always USE the scanks for a moment and cast them aside. So it is what it is.

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it's along the lines of people liking people to control them, which you seem to refer to without naming d/s or knowing what d/s is, as it is somewhat widely understood within society to varying degrees.

you say you don't mean to offend anyone and then you say 'single skanks' as if all single women are 'skanks', you speak apparently on behalf of all married women when myself, kakarotte and apparently yourself, are all married women and you are the only one who thinks this way.

I also hate the term 'skank' or 'slut' or anything that borders on 'slut-shaming'.

Also to be honest, none of this actually has anything to do with anyone cheating/seducing on anyone. The only reference to that within the posts has been saying that the girlfriend has cheated on the guy, and within your posts. So I don't think you actually see our side of the argument. Not everyone is cheating or wanting to cheat with everyone else 0.o' Sheesh.

You really do have a sick and twisted view of the world, darlin' :crazy:

*shares kakarotte's popcorn*

I'm sorry if I'm interrupting something, but I just came off of two days of complete and utter chaos. Now, my boyfriend is a lifeguard, yes? Yes. So at the pool he's guarding for is a woman, a woman who is nearly ten years older than my boyfriend, yet still thinks it's okay to try and be sexual with him. Fine, whatever, my boyfriend's a cutie, but if his girlfriend tells you to stop, you stop. Now, my boyfriend is not the brightest bulb in the lamp and he didn't really get it, he just thought she was being overly friendly (yeah, but he's a lovable idiot.)

Anyway, this woman just happens to be an alcoholic and she gets into an accident with her three year old in the car. Naturally, her husband throws her out. Now she takes complete advantage of the fact that my boyfriend (To hell with it, his name is Bryan) is such a nice person. She manages to sucker him into bringing him to OUR home to stay the night. Now, one night. Not such a bi deal, I can do this..... OH MY SWEET HARLEM SHAKING HONEY BOO BOO!!!!!! First, she gets completely trashed off of alcohol I was SAVING to drink for myself! Espresso flavored vodka. I barely got a shot of it. She downed the entire bottle. She didn't even ask if it was okay, just went into my fridge and grabbed it. She didn't even apologize when I told her I was saving it. I gave Bryan "the look" and he nodded, but it was 1am, there was nothing we could do.

Then me and Bryan go out onto the porch to light a few small light show-y fireworks because....just because. And she comes out and is all "let me light one". And she is trashed. I mean she's so drunk, she's one sheet to the wind. Now, this dumb woman decides to hold the lit firework in her hand. Guess what? It goes of, she gets third degree burns, and we have to go to the hospital. We are at the hospital for three hours. She's screaming and hollering and making all this fuss and even tries to hit the doctors helping her. Three. Hours. Finally we get back home and we all pass out.

Fast forward to 8pm the next night. She gets under my best friend's skin. We get back home and she wants to dye her hair blue. Now my tub is blue. My tub. is blue. And right now, nothing I use is working to get it out. the dye job goes screwy.And we have to make sure no dye gets on anything else. Now, she's still all upset because she has nobody else but us and yada yada yada. The only good thing to come out of this was that Bryan and I got to have a huge private talk about where we were going and stuff like that and it went well.

Now she's off to rehab for six months, Bryan is at work, and me? I'm busy cleaning up the junkyard of a house that was left after. Mountains of soda cans, my blue bathroom, pizza boxes and all kinds of other stuff...I...I just.....I'm at a loss. Why are we so nice that we just suffer in silence with a house guest like that.....