B!TC# IT OUT!

[Mermaid Lilium]

Thanks guys, I'm feeling a lot better today. I talked with my grandpa about it today one on one and got it all out. Im just gonna ignore him all together upon my grandpas suggestion. My grandpa told me if he keeps it up he will kick him out since we all live on my grandpa's property. Apparently he has been pulling the same stuff at their house and my grandpa and aunt are sick of it. I dont want to see him kicked out but he has been causing a lot of isses beyond this and its causing my grandpa health issues.
@Pearlie he is 45, he acts abouts 4.

~The goldfish mermaid~

Having lived with a sociopath I've had to learn the hard way that the best way to deal with people who take great delight in tearing others down is jut to ignore them and not give them a weapon - don't let them know that something hurts or upsets you, don't give them a reaction or they'll just keep doing it. Shut them down, turn the conversation onto something mundane and keep your chin up =) I'm glad you have someone to talk to about this though as that support is priceless =)

[Echidna]

I've had my (un)fair share of sociopaths.

The worst aspect about that is, if you absolutely cannot avoid them, all you can do is ignore them.
They won't change, and if there's nothing you can really DO (short of moving out and ceasing all contact, which isn't always possible), it usually tends to be very depressing in the long run.

[deepblue]

^That's the truth. If he hasn't changed by 45, he's REALLY not going to- there's obviously something very wrong with him, but there's nothing anyone can do about someone who behaves that way. Who knows... maybe getting kicked out and finally having it hit him that he's driven away everyone is the only thing that CAN get through to him.

So glad your grandpa has your back.

[Rogue Siren]

Stupid pet shop distributing people! Ugh!!!

I didn't know where else to complain about this...so I guess it fits here.

I work at a pet store (does not sell dogs/cats thank god). I work with the animals and receive animals. Well the other day was fish day. We've been having cooler weather the past few weeks, and the fish have been coming in at cooler temps than they should.... We contact the distribution center and let them know.

Well everyone should have heard about the artic-like temperatures around south lately! The DC should have freaking known! Well they send the fish with a single heat pack in the coolers with them. ONE. Needless to say they were freezing when we got them! These are tropical fish and the lowest temp I recorded was 43 degrees F. Most the fish were not moving. We did get some goldfish and they were fine, but the rest.... We let them slowly warm up at room temp, then added them to the tanks to acclimate a bit more. Most were dead. The rest are probably dead now because of stress. Argh! I want to beat those idiots for packing them so poorly!!!

[BlueMermaid]

Dacora, your uncle is one of those people to just avoid like the plague. If he speaks to you, just ignore him. If needed, tell him that when he can speak to you with respect, you will talk to him. Otherwise just pretend he isn't there. Do not tolerate abuse but don't abuse back either.

[BlueMermaid]

Poor fishes!

Stupid pet shop distributing people! Ugh!!!

I didn't know where else to complain about this...so I guess it fits here.

I work at a pet store (does not sell dogs/cats thank god). I work with the animals and receive animals. Well the other day was fish day. We've been having cooler weather the past few weeks, and the fish have been coming in at cooler temps than they should.... We contact the distribution center and let them know.

Well everyone should have heard about the artic-like temperatures around south lately! The DC should have freaking known! Well they send the fish with a single heat pack in the coolers with them. ONE. Needless to say they were freezing when we got them! These are tropical fish and the lowest temp I recorded was 43 degrees F. Most the fish were not moving. We did get some goldfish and they were fine, but the rest.... We let them slowly warm up at room temp, then added them to the tanks to acclimate a bit more. Most were dead. The rest are probably dead now because of stress. Argh! I want to beat those idiots for packing them so poorly!!!

[BlueMermaid]

Well I feel really bad complaining, because I have alot of blessings in my life. But I'm hoping my complaining will perhaps, not only make me feel better to get it out, but maybe someone will even know how to help.

So, in a rush of excitement I bought a tank from a guy on craigslist. I took his word for it that it was not damaged. I spent a large amount of money on it, but not nearly what it would cost to get new. It was great, but then I discovered just how insanely heavy this thing is and if I wanted to use it for events, I would have to hire 4 strong men just to get it on and off the trailer. So instead, I spent another large amount of money to have a custom trailer built that would support the weight of the tank while full of water. So it took a long time but I finally got the new trailer and got the tank on it, well actually my husband did, because I was out of town working. Well I told my husband to please fill up the tank and test everything out and make sure everything was working ok, because I had stupidly told a client I had a tank and they wanted it at their event the following month. I would not be getting back into town until a week before, so I needed him to do it for me. Well, he never did until I got home, 1 week before we were to use it at an event. A few days before the event he finally started filling it. Water spewed from all the seams. He went and got some special glue for tanks and fixed it. We filled it about half way and the water was staying in. *whew* I thought, that was close! Well, we took it to the event. I was so excited. I was worried because I had never even got to practice in it. Oh well, I'd have to wing it! Here I am, inside the dry tank, right before we filled it up.

I got out and we started filling it. But then this happened:

Long story short, the client was not happy, I was not happy. We took it home, tried fixing it 2 more times, still not fixed. In fact, the last try seemed to work until the water got to the top, and then the bottom separated from one of the walls and it cracked a spot on the wall.

So, we took it to an aquarium builder to see if he could fix it. She said the wrong glue was used when it was built, it would have to be taken apart, the edges sawed off, and re-glued together. He said new glue won't stick to the old glue, and there is no way to get the old glue off. Oh, and he doesn't do that and neither does anyone else in the area.
I don't know what to do. I should probably just count my losses and move on.

On a side note, even if my tank had worked, wow, tanks are alot of money and work! I give alot of credit tho those who use them. They take alot of time money and patience to use. And I just have a small one!

[Mer_Adella]

I'm so sorry BlueMermaid that is horrible. I guess its a reminder to all of us about buying things on craigslist. And I didn't mean to insult you if it did I just meant that i have bought some things off of there and they weren't what they were supposed to be. I would love to have a tank too. Even a small one person one like yours But I can understand the frustration in buying it, spending the $ to have a special trailer made, and then finding out that the guy who built it basically didn't learn how to do it properly. I wish i could direct you somewhere to learn how to do it yourself or to someone that knew how to do it in your area . This is one of the big reasons why the pirate festival near me says that we shouldn't do tanks; they are expensive, they can be dangerous, and it takes the money to build them right.

[BlueMermaid]

No, it's something I hope people learn from my experience. In my excitement to get a tank, I did not think clearly.
[QUOTE=Mer_Adella;104887]I'm so sorry BlueMermaid that is horrible. I guess its a reminder to all of us about buying things on craigslist. And I didn't mean to insult you if it did

[Dacora]

@bluemermaid
There are several youtube how to's on how to reglue fish tanks when the silicone gets compromised. They are not that big but its basically the same thing in practice. Idk if you want to do that but its better than having a useless hunk of glass sitting around.

~The goldfish mermaid~

[BlueMermaid]

Thanks Dacora. I'll take a look. My tank is acrylic tho and that seems to be the reason they can't get the glue off or reglue it. But youtube is pretty amazing, I just may find a solution! Thanks!

@bluemermaid
There are several youtube how to's on how to reglue fish tanks when the silicone gets compromised. They are not that big but its basically the same thing in practice. Idk if you want to do that but its better than having a useless hunk of glass sitting around.

~The goldfish mermaid~

[Merman Dan]

There are several youtube how to's on how to reglue fish tanks when the silicone gets compromised.

You might also try the forums at Reef Central

[Merman Arion]

I didn't know where to post so I might as well do it here. It's not really a rant but I feel like I should get it out of my chest

We are in 2014, I'm 25 and it has been officially 10 months since I registered here. I have evolved a lot. Many things happened and something just occured to me.

WHERE ARE THEY?

If you wonder who I'm talking about, it's the mermaids members who do not show since a while. I used to read lots of posts from them during Summer, some even before that, some afterwards and then, BAM! Nothing! Nada! Niente! Nichts! Rien! WTF happened?

I have checked some of my merfriends here in my profile data and eleven are MIA since more two months already. I wonder what is happening. Are they busy? Did they... quit? I could give some names but I don't get it. Some of them were very active for a while like it was their brand new passion and posted a lot of messages and then, POOF! Gone! I don't know how to interpret that. Is it the effect of the mermaid "trend" ? First it's so cool and then, once they get in a tail and swim, "oh that was it?"

I really don't know how to explain my feelings but I guess it could be a mix of sadness, disappointment, perplexity?


I noticed as well that a lot are still active but they just stop posting and expressing their opinions. I wonder why. Is it because of the last dramas that happened recently? They don't feel like their opinions matter anymore? I think it's a shame because we are a community, the last even Merfest proved that we are actually a family and yet, something just makes me feel like it could be so much better here. We have a lot of members but I feel like we are just a small group in fact.

We are having a lot of newbies at this moment and I confess that I kind of stopped welcoming them because they just don't last. I asked myself "what's the point? In some months, he/she may quit." I feel baffled a lot when I see newcomers asking many questions which can be answered if they do a little effort researching first and I don't mean to be rude or a jerk for saying that. I feel that the forum is changing. Maybe that's why I feel uneasy? I just don't know. I guess I'm a complicated fish in the end...

I'm sorry. Thanks for taking some time to read my pathetic 2ç.

[Elle]

People do get busy. I know there have been times where i just haven't gotten around to getting on here and other times where i just don't feel i have anything to add to the conversations at hand.
Don't be too disappointed. Life happens. Usually they come back and it'll be like they never left. I always like that about good friends. You can go without seeing them fir weeks, months, years and then you run into them and its like thy never left

Sent from my GT-I9100 using Tapatalk 2

[SeaGlass Siren]

I know a few have migrated forums, and others, well you gotta consider that some are still in school and it's exam season for most of them.

And then there's the people who do log on I see what's up but just lurk, and some use Chat box only

[Echidna]

While I wondered myself where some have gone, it's winter, the dearth time for mermaiding.
It's dark and bleak and cold, and even if people log here, they might not feel enough in the mer mood to post

also, winter's the time of influenza, colds and other nasties, those are big (mer) moodkillers.

[Mer_Adella]

Rant!

My boyfriend and I decided to get a trash service and we picked the big one because they are cheaper than most and they are really good about getting the trash and such (Waste Management). You can only get a trash service by doing online enrollement. So thats what we did. We paid the full amount for a full year as it was cheaper than paying per month. That was $171.68!!!!!!!! That night the payment was processed.

the next morning I asked him if we had to pick up our trash can (like we had to do in Alabama) or if they dropped it off. He said to call. So I did. They fucking told me that they DON'T SERVICE OUR AREA!!!!!

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??

Why in the hell did your website (after I typed in our zipcode) say that we could get a residential or commercial dumpster service if you dont freaking service our area??? So after getting a little snippy with the guy at the office he gave me a phone # to call to get it refunded. I called this morning and I waited for 8 minutes before someone answered. NOW THAT ASSHOLE IS TRANSFERING ME BECAUSE HE DOESN'T DO THAT!!!! I am getting so mad right now.

After I get this done, I am making a formal complaint against them that their website is a bunch of crap!!!! When we wanted to get broadband cable (and went to the website of a carrier around here) we typed in our zipcode and instantly it popped up with "I'm sorry but we do not serivce this area"....WHY THE HELL DIDN'T THE TRASH SERVICE DO THAT???? I'm so mad that I am being jerked around. $171.68 is a lot of money!!!! UGH!!!

[Mer_Adella]

Change of subject....

My uncle, his wife, and two kids had that NASTY flu...idk what strain it is this year, but whatever...they got over it. But my grandma got it today. My mom talked to her at 7 this morning and she was fine. I talked to her at 10am and she said she didn't feel well at all. I checked in with her at 1pm and she was way worse, actually had to get off the phone because she was going to throw up. I called my mom at work to let her know. She immediate said, "She probably got the flu that David and his family had. He wouldn't listen when she said she didn't want to go out to eat because she knew he had been sick the week before"

Well at 9:30pm I called my mom's house and my dad said that she wasn't there...something about my grandma. So I called my mom's cell. She said that my grandma couldn't move and didn't want to be alone. so she went over there and just hung out. My mother is a teacher and has school tomorrow. She told me that she called my Uncle (he lives closer than my mom) but he was home with his kids and couldn't come. So he called my mom and told her to go over there.

My mom had to help my grandma go to the bathroom and as my grandma was leaning on my mom washing her hands, she literally slid down the length of my mom and fell to the floor. My mom couldn't lift her up and had to call my uncle. he was in bed and came over in 15min but only stayed to get my gma up and in bed and left again.

I am very disgusted with him at the moment. He owns his own business and winter is his slow time. Yet he makes my mom go over there to be with his mother. I understand he has two small kids but his wife was home at the time. She won't be there tomorrow, but my mom has to take a day off of work tomorrow because she is so tired tonight and is worried that now she will be sick. Am I wrong to be mad at my uncle? I'm not SUPER mad, just more disappointed that he doesn't think of his situation versus my mothers. He lives 10 minutes away where my mom lives 1/2 an hour away. He has his own business where my mom is a school teacher. I dont know. I try to think about it and I try to understand. He has little kids. But my mind instantly thinks, you shoved off the thought of your mother being very sick onto another sibling.

If my mom were that sick and she called me...I would be there. Same with my brother (if she called him). Does anyone know what I mean or think it wrong?

[SIF]

Seahorses and jellyfish! I haven't done ANYTHING right today... I started out the day looking at character mark-ups for a friends senior project webseries/ film thing and freaking out when I got to one character in a confederate uniform cause she's got the cowboy i've been crushin' on for three years playing that character and he looks AMAZING in a uniform. We got to school and I feel off the school bus, into a little group of sixth graders. I went to get breakfast and got sidetracked by a friend asking me a theatre based Q and then my "6th grade buddy" needing to do our secret handshake. I went to class, but got the wrong class (every period of the day), and painted our set for Oliver the last two periods of the day. Our set is two stories and the platforms are 6 feet high. I painted set and stood up into a loudspeaker box about nine times (my "buddies" were having a good laugh at counting...) and then a ventilation shaft. Then I fell off the set, hit my head on the stage and apparently babbled "nonsense" about (...a corkboard and a lightswitch?) i think they said.... And when the guys came to move me from under the painters I thought one was my ex mertender and said some silly things about how pretty he was and something about getting inside my tail to the other(who happened to be the kid i'm crushing on), followed promptly by slipping on a stage-tarp and falling on my butt in a paint tray. At the end of shop class I had to wash out my brush, and ended washing all of the brushes and buckets, but lost my grip on a bucket and got a full ricochet blast of water to the face and boobs... It's been one depth of a day....

[Mermaid Lilium]

Change of subject....

My uncle, his wife, and two kids had that NASTY flu...idk what strain it is this year, but whatever...they got over it. But my grandma got it today. My mom talked to her at 7 this morning and she was fine. I talked to her at 10am and she said she didn't feel well at all. I checked in with her at 1pm and she was way worse, actually had to get off the phone because she was going to throw up. I called my mom at work to let her know. She immediate said, "She probably got the flu that David and his family had. He wouldn't listen when she said she didn't want to go out to eat because she knew he had been sick the week before"

Well at 9:30pm I called my mom's house and my dad said that she wasn't there...something about my grandma. So I called my mom's cell. She said that my grandma couldn't move and didn't want to be alone. so she went over there and just hung out. My mother is a teacher and has school tomorrow. She told me that she called my Uncle (he lives closer than my mom) but he was home with his kids and couldn't come. So he called my mom and told her to go over there.

My mom had to help my grandma go to the bathroom and as my grandma was leaning on my mom washing her hands, she literally slid down the length of my mom and fell to the floor. My mom couldn't lift her up and had to call my uncle. he was in bed and came over in 15min but only stayed to get my gma up and in bed and left again.

I am very disgusted with him at the moment. He owns his own business and winter is his slow time. Yet he makes my mom go over there to be with his mother. I understand he has two small kids but his wife was home at the time. She won't be there tomorrow, but my mom has to take a day off of work tomorrow because she is so tired tonight and is worried that now she will be sick. Am I wrong to be mad at my uncle? I'm not SUPER mad, just more disappointed that he doesn't think of his situation versus my mothers. He lives 10 minutes away where my mom lives 1/2 an hour away. He has his own business where my mom is a school teacher. I dont know. I try to think about it and I try to understand. He has little kids. But my mind instantly thinks, you shoved off the thought of your mother being very sick onto another sibling.

If my mom were that sick and she called me...I would be there. Same with my brother (if she called him). Does anyone know what I mean or think it wrong?

I have been through similar frustrations - until we finally kicked him out just before xmas, mum's partner (who was actually my dad's brother, just to complicate things lol) he basically never went to see his own 96 y/o mother, my mum was the one who did everything for her and the one who had to go to the hospital whenever gran's panic/careline button went off, usually because paul was too wasted to even get up. Mum has an important job and she would end up sitting with gran in the hospital til like 3am and then have to be up at 7.30am to get ready for work