B!TC# IT OUT!

[Fun123joker]

DX ugh i know right! i dont have it as hard as you but it sucks having religous parents! i make a skirt and they are the only ones that say its too short. it passes the finger tip test but noooooo the shortest we can go up to is up to the knee. what are we Mormon? (sorry Mormons!) I will NOT have a book tell me what to wear! my parents like to invest but accroding to the bible that is a sin but every christian choose not to follow that rule for centuries. so when they call my skirt short then I CALL USURY!

[Rivertee]

I hear ya, I was southern Baptist so dress code wasn't much of a problem but when we went out to other church functions others would look at only the girls in jeans and seriously it's like we had horns and tails. Honestly I thought we were all love no matter our differences...

Just keep being you!

[SeaGlass Siren]

Beauty is subjective. What I think is beautiful another person might disagree and think that it's ugly. I'm cool with that. But when they start showing down my throat that "no I am right you are wrong, this is ugly" I tart to get into a fresking raging fit. It would be like saying about a person "I think tho person is ugly so you should agree with me and think so too" uhm how about NO??


So. This is stemming from bed shopping with my mother in law. Went to Ikea to pick out a really nice light grey bed frame and matching nightstand and computer desk to match the theme of my room. And she goes EAwW SUCH A NASTy COLOUR. Pick this one. She picks like a regular wood bed that I'm not looking for . And does not even match the room. (pics of my room are up on the home decor thread.) if it even remotely matched what I was going for I probably wouldn't have minded so much. But this was my bed and that's not the colour hat goes with the room.
To make her see that she was being absolutely ridiculous and to make her hear what she sounded like i mimiced her back and went "EEWW what a nasty colour". It's OUR bed and Steven and I like the light grey and WE are the ones buying it. Now mind you light grey isn't a very popular colour at Ikea and they're discontinuing it soon so I got really upset. We argues for like a good half our on a freaking bed frame wtf.

Main issue I have here: "yes you don't agree with me, yes I don't agree with you. But don't shove your beliefs down MY throat about what you think is beautiful because I certainly don't to it to you or other people. Stop tryin to enforce it."

[Lucinda]

Parent promised curb his drinking. Said parent failed within a few weeks. Enough said.

[Meilyn]

Seaglass siren, I'm sorry you have to deal with that stuff. My mom's the same way and I was even homeless by choice to try to escape that stuff when I was 12 years old. From personal experience, what you could do which may be best is to remove yourself from that kind of environment. Assuming you're old enough with a job and stuff, get some friends to move out with you or even, ask if you could rent out a room elsewhere

I've removed myself from such environments recently (shortly after Feb 9th of this year) and I told myself I would change. I've been so much better now, my mom's literally called me just to get me to stop by the house more often for dinner.

Sometimes, THEY never know what they have until it's gone. And sometimes, life just gets too much for some people so they take it out on the ones around them. I don't know what else I could say but I really hope it all gets better for each and everyone of you on here with bad living circumstances good people often get dealt bad hands

[SeaGlass Siren]

thank you for your kind words meilyn. it sounds like you've been through a lot as well.

i'm definitely old enough, i'm just waiting for my house to be built. should be done next year.

[Vixy]

At my work if someone phones in it completely overrides it if I hadn't already started someone's order, and I've been trained to take the phone quickly.

A lady comes in and we start talking about a con we both went to recently, she stops and starts looking at the menu. And the phone rings, I apologise and take it and seconds before I finished it when both my coworkers are around she starts walking out.

She then has a go at me saying she was talking to me and I had been so rude to pick up the phone because she was first. I try and explain but she wouldn't listen even after I said I would love to carry on talking about it.

I had been feeling down, and I broke down. I told everyone I had enough, I can't do it anymore. I'm looking for another job, I then walked off.

I just couldn't handle it, I would of had a lovely conversation with the lady if she waited seconds. I'm fast, it wouldn't of taken long.

I know I reacted wrongly, but it just all came out.

[SeaGlass Siren]

vixy, some people are just assholes. *hugs*

[Vixy]

vixy, some people are just assholes. *hugs*

*hugs* I've been crying on and off. I didn't have a great start after being told I can't have next friday off for something I've been looking forward to going. Even when I've been really ill I've had to go work, even when I'm legally required to have time off with what I have I still had to go in.

[Little_Orca]

We have talked about people who photoshop themselves into photographs and what not before, but I am almost more irritated by people who photoshop themselves or others into other works of art and then post it on an art site. I have done this myself before as a fun thing and put it on facebook, but I stated who the painting had been by and the paintings are usually famous. I saw one the other day that annoyed me; there was no description stating who the original artist was. Just ruffled my scales a little.

[Mermaid Galene]

I agree, Orca. Photoshop is a double-edged sword. It has so many legitimate uses. Photography can do weird things to one's image; lighting can be off, angles can be weird. It can make you look really good or really bad. With Photoshop, you can correct those errors and make a photograph look more like the real you. It's also an amazing tool for artistic expression. But it's so easy for the unscrupulous (or merely vain) to create an image that out and out lies and steals. I use Photoshop, Illustrator and other Adobe software all the time, and I couldn't get by without them. But I have self-imposed rules about how far I'm willing to retouch a photo. I correct exposure, lighting, and tone if needed, and I use filters to create a mood. But I don't try to change my body shape or hide my age. I'm 59. I've got wrinkles, and I'm not ashamed of them; I earned them by living life! And I never take someone else's image and drop it into mine uncredited, unless I've exhausted every avenue to find and credit the original creator.

[Winged Mermaid]

Frustrated? Pissed? Sing (er, scream) along!
(Warning: composed entirely of NSFW language.)



Side note, this is also me when I play video games, haha! Gamer guys/girls I'm sure relate I downloaded this like 8 years ago, still have it in my music library to help me laugh when I'm in a really angry mood. It's therapeutic and funny.. and catchy XP

[Mermaid Mhara]

Iona, I just put that on and my Mother rushed upstairs telling me to "TURN THAT PORN OFF, WE HAVE GUESTS AND WE CAN HEAR IT ALL!" Q_Q I had to bring her in here and show her it wasn't porn. Oh my days...ahahah!!

Anyways, I need a rant ugh.

So, I've got an eating disorder as some of my friends on here may know. Now I'm very stable lately...and eat quite well, urm...let me explain my usual eating conditions before I get into this.

So it started nearly two years ago, when I first started college (Hairdressing though, not dance as I'm in now) If anyone here is a Hair and Beauty type-person they'll understand that the people who take these courses can be the Bitchiest, most horrible people you could ever encounter. I had to deal with a classroom of 90% of those people...then there's me, shy, lonely, and a bit odd. I was instantly the outcast.

Being around mirrors every single day, made me feel like crap, and on top of all this I was being bullied big time...BY A TEACHER. (That's another story though...) So I tried dieting to make myself feel and look better, along with starting a big exercise regime (this is when I finally took dance again...so there's one plus to this whole mess.)

Eventually I was mentally and Physically exhausted...no matter how hard I tried there was always some asshole telling me my diet wasn't good enough, or I wasn't putting enough effort in, even if they didn't even know me properly!

Eventually, I don't even know how it started if I'm honest, somewhere along the line I stopped eating...I went through phases where I would eat properly for a few days, then not eat for the next few days. I know it's unhealthy, but I literally had no control of it. I even went to the Doctors alone (I was 16 at the time) and that was scary! But my local, medieval doctor basically told me I was doing it to myself, and he could do nothing because it was my fault...and it wasn't an eating disorder because I was a boy. Ugh. Obviously, being a naive teen I believed him.

Everything kinda went steady once I quit my college course in June of last year. I auditioned for a dance school and got in, even though my old hair teachers told me I wouldn't get onto any other course if I quit theirs. I was actually happy...but, then it started all over again.

I have this thing about mirrors, they make me feel like utter crap. And what's all over the walls of a Ballet studio? ...Salami. No, wait...mirrors.

It made it ten times worse that every further education academy I was thinking of applying for basically put in their entry requirements 'No Fatties allowed!' and that every video of a good dancer was a stick thin girl or a muscled thin guy.

I stopped eating, but this time I went overboard and lasted a full four days with no food, and barely anything to drink either. I collapsed in a dance class and well...that's the story so far.

Since then I've been okay, but now the 'don't eat' thing has stopped and instead I eat and eat and force myself to purge...(tmi sorry...)

But I consider myself doing well.

But my family and friends are driving me CRAZY!! :/ if I tell them I'm thinking of 'eating healthier' they make a face like I've just told them I'm about to commit suicide. They give me long rants. You guys have no idea how many times I've heard the "Not eating isn't any good...you'll just get fatter by doing that!" rant...Like, I KNOW...I GET IT. SHUT UP YOU'RE NOT HELPING YOU ARE MAKING IT WORSE.

Then comes the constant food talk. "Want some food?...oh go on! I made you a sandwich, I'd be upset if you didn't eat it now..." blah blah. UGH.

I want to lose weight so bad, but I am a type of person that needs help, advice, and somewhere or someone to go talk about these things or else I freak out. And so far everyone just makes me want to stop food altogether. It's just...argh. No.

You know what, fuck it all. I'ma live off a diet of cake and be the real life Chibi Mer. K. Sorted.

[PearlieMae]

Good heavens, I wish I could offer some sort of advice or comfort, something to help you break this cycle!

[Jeblily]

I'm going to be honest, my parents have finally trusted me with having a scale in my room ( not that I didn't sneak into their room to weigh myself) and I know how hard it can be. Sometimes it just doesn't seem worth it to have to eat, the urge just isn't there. I went a whole week once on about 15 saltine crackers and a cup or two of tea. You can get over these things though, with ballet it's hard with teacher constantly grilling you about what you ate, and even the pre-show weigh ins... Eating healthy however will unfortunately never just be easy. I think it might help to try cooking for yourself, make only what you need and only things you will like. Healthy things can taste amazing as well, to reduce calories try adding delicious herb and spice combinations to veggies without lots of butter ad trans fats. I am still struggling myself about three years ago I stopped drinking water and I am just finally starting to drink water again... I would say these behaviors result fro trying to be accepted and trying to have some control over who you are! I would just say remember that every morning you dress yourself, that you choose to walk down the street that you do, that is control and not to forget the decisions you do make regarding yourself!!

[Mermaid Mhara]

Pearlie - Don't worry, just knowing you read it and would help if you could makes me happy ^_^

Jeblily - My mom has this thing against me cooking for myself now, but I'm slowly getting there and she is getting more lenient with me. Hopefully by Summer they will have backed off as me and my friend are starting an exercise regime to keep us fit and ready for second year in classes while we're on Holiday.

[Forrest]

I feel like I am invading, but from what I've seen this place is filled with amazing people, so I am going to push past my shyness and anxiety to post...

I was in an abusive relationship for about a year. He would keep me from my friends, put me down constantly, and ridicule my choices and interests (physical abuse was only an issue once, when he tried to choke me). I got so depressed that I stopped eating entirely about halfway into the relationship, having maybe a sandwich or an egg every few days. I lost about thirty pounds and everyone who I talked to continuously commented on how great I looked. I would shirk it off, uncomfortable because I was getting compliments for doing something regarded as unhealthy to get that way, even if it wasn't on purpose. After I managed to get away from this guy, it took me a long time before I could eat again, and by that time I was in a job where I couldn't eat for over 14 hours (I worked as a chef in a restaurant--surprisingly you don't get to eat the food while you work). By the time I would get home from the job, I was so tired and my stomach was so empty that I just couldn't eat without getting sick.

Now I work as a teacher, for early education, and I have gained back most of the weight I lost. Now I am dealing with comments on gaining weight, and my own insecurities about it. I was offered a chance to model as a mermaid in a couple months with someone I knew in high school (who is now a successful model herself), and right away my thoughts are going back to weight, and I am worried I will go back into the habit of just not eating. I keep feeling sick every time I eat and I know it is all in my head, but it still worries me.

I'm sorry if my plight is silly, I know it seems so to me, I just felt like I should get this off my chest.

[PearlieMae]

Honey, you're here now. There's no way you could invade! And no, your plight isn't silly at all.

[Echidna]

Dancing and modelling- the progenitors of eating disorders

I had a disorder for the entire length of my dancing career.
I learned to eat normally only slowly because after dancing, I worked as a model.

It was really hard in the beginning, but once I'd done it for a while (normal eating behaviour & diet, not the "lots of liquids, no fat/sugar/rice/wheat ever" of dancing classes...), it became a habit quickly, and now I only have to remember to eat regularly.

A while ago, I decided to gain weight, because my underweight was precarious and dangerous.
I didn't gain much, just enough to be out of the "dead-zone", so to speak, but still I was thrown out of my modelling agency when I refused to lose the few pounds I'd just gained.

Good riddance, I say.
No job is worth ending up dead because some addle-brained designers think walking skeletons an inch away from heart failure are cool.

[Ottery]

I recently ordered a mermaid top from an etsy shop, and 2 weeks later after she said it would be finished it's still not here. :/ I'm kind of nervous about poking her again 'cause I don't wanna be rude, but it's been a while and I need that top soon! It doesn't seem that labor intensive (it's stuff glued onto a swimsuit top to make it look mermaid-ish), but I've never really made something like that so I don't want to come across as impatient. ARG!