Merbellas Thread

[SeaGlass Siren]

guys. Literally everyone needs to take a huge fucking step back.

If this was truly an issue why wasn't it brought beforehand upon in boxing the tail? Why say she was satisfied then, but then leave a bad review now? Why make the bad review only available to select people?

Why is everyone getting up in arms about Raina calling her out for this? And why is she being sent threats for pointing this shit out? Not cool guys.

edit: yes I did see the video. I kindly asked Raina for details and she was happy to provide. If you just ask her politely she will tell you. Pull your head out of your asses :/ the stupidity on this forum is why I'm only lurking in the forums now.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Literally the fact that everyone is leaving after Raina receives threats of being CUT by THIS persons friends says a LOT

[PearlieMae]

Blaze: Absolutely. This should have been worked out privately before taking it online in such an off-putting manner.

Sea Glass: a HUGE step back!

[Mermaid Lilium]

I'm not going to really get involved in this whole thing but the overflow back onto Facebook has brought me back onto here, though I've been inactive for a while (damn Tapatalk hasn't been notifying me).

The one thing I can't bite my tongue on and bothers me the most is the way people are in one breath demanding proof and evidence and in the next, crying out saying it's a breach of privacy to show actual evidence and proof to those who need to see it.

Seriously can you not see how ridiculous that is? You're literally putting raina (and raven) into a situation she cannot win in. Talk about catch 22.

I agree with seaglass. Everyone needs to chill, and unite around the fact that it's never ever okay to harass others online or to threaten others. Especially threatening violence.

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[Thalassa]

Aw, that's sad that Raven had to step back from customs, but I hope it helps her to find the joy in her tail making again.

I don't find anything at all odd in it, especially given what this has all evolved into. It seems perfectly normal to me to be fed up, have something like this happen, and simply say, "That's it. No more."

Sea glass, I'm with you. I really don't get why this exploded into such a problem. Raina defending someone and providing the mods proof privately isn't new. Neither is Raven receiving a negative review. The only reason I can think of is that people have an emotional connection to either Raven or Raina (since Raina is now being personally insulted) or to the mer in question.

Yeah, this is why I stay out of the forums for the most part. Because people just get so darned worked up.


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[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

So I'm basically an outsider here, a newbie mermaid who has been on and off the forum for many years.
Ive become so sad at this forum. I have lurked for years just enjoying the community, but there is no support for each other any more. It's all two faced, bitchy and high school drama. All I see over and over again is mermaids tearing each other down.
Just look at how this discussion has gone, with neither the mermaid in question or Raven even speaking for themselves, yet everyone is throwing allegations and name calling around. Why are we even talking about it?
As someone in the middle of tail design and looking for a professional tail maker I am terrified at what might end up said behind my back as a customer. I'm honestly ashamed and heartbroken that the community has gone this way from what started as a positive area to connect with like-minded people.
Anyway, I'm not an important mermaids on this forum, but just felt the need to comment as a nobody who isn't involved with those in question at all. Maybe you will all have a look at how you are coming across and reassess if it's worth all the drama. We all cop so much judgement from the outside world as it is without bickering like children amongst ourselves. Let's support each other instead of gossip.

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[Mermaidmechanic]

Holy crap this escalated quickly!

Mernetwork is just as... Spirited as I remember it being hahaha...

I will be as unbiased and honest as possiible with what I say here. I recently spent time with Raven when I picked up my tail after its revamp. I saw in front of me about 5 of her different tails, all of them were gorgeous. I haven't seen a single product of Ravens that was less than amazing. I have seen tails from multiple creators and honestly I think Raven's product is superior (I don't mean any insult to any other tail makers, this is just my personal opinion). Even one of her own personal tails she called "flawed" was of a much higher quality and standard then my mertailor tail. When I still was on an unfamiliar basis with Raven, she stressed over every detail of my tail even though it was already made. She offered a free resize since it was an already made tail even though i never complained about the size. When I did eventually take her up on the offer, she went out of her way to completely repaint it because she said her technique has improved and she wanted to make sure she sent out every tail as perfect as she could. She even repainted a top I had purchased off her cave clearance to match the tail free of charge, even though told her she didn't have to. When we hang out, she spends a decent amount of time expressing her anxieties over whether or not people will like their tails and she legitimately prioritizes peoples satisfaction.

I can't say a thing about the other party. I don't know them and I haven't seen the review. I can make an unbiased assumption that maybe she was upset she wasn't satisfied and was so anxious to just share her tail already that she had waited for that perhaps she didn't think to contact Raven about it first. But I don't know that for certain. What I do know is that Raven will always do her best to make her clients happy and she does send more than adequate pictures of the tails completion before shipping/ sending it off. Regardless, there is a lot of passion in the mermaid community and it quickly turns into rage and anger. Maybe go for a swim and cool off a bit guys. We're all on team mermaid here.

[AniaR]

Most the comments about her lying on the review are those who have not seen it.

^ by people who DID see it, and an admin even CONFIRMED the review contained a large amount of lies.

I honestly just don't get it sometimes with people (not directed at you Nixie I know you're new and just trying to figure this out, this is my general frustration). It's not even a debate. We aren't talking about where she liked her tail or not. Or the subjective nature of it is good or bad tail because those points can be debated til the cows come home. We are talking about intentional lies in the review and no one seems to care, question motivation, or consider the emotional damage that does to Raven. People here can say all they want about 1 bad review for a business, but you have no idea the crap Raven deals with on a regular bases and how tail making ruins her life, how people constantly threaten to ruin her so they can get what they want, how people DO get personal vendettas, that she has people try to extort her, black mail her, or threaten her on a regular bases to get what they want.

When things are murkey I appreciate people not taking sides, but when facts have been verified and people choose to be "neutral" they aren't actually neutral. They are taking the side of the oppressor by doing nothing, and it enables the oppressor to do it again to someone else. I'm not saying people need to think the reviewer is a bad person, or go after them, or anything. But when it has been verified that someone lied a LOT about another member of the community I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY ANYONE IS GETTING SLAMMED FOR TRYING TO SHOW THAT VICTIM SUPPORT. It's like victim shaming, all this gas lighting and dancing around to excuse the behaviour or put ownance on Raven.

would it kill some of the people here to just say "wow that sucks, sorry Raven." instead of trying to make a spectacle out of it ANYTIME anyone speaks up to support her on ANYTHING

[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

Sorry I edited my comment as I realised I was doing the same thing in speculating over something I don't know anything about. I just don't understand why we are talking about it all, it has nothing to do with any of us in the first place. It's just comes across as gossipy and harsh.
Maybe I'm just a bit naive but I just wish everyone could get along. I'd be devastated to find out I had people talking about me behind my back on a forum who didn't know what was actually going on. I mean that from both a clients perspective and a tail makers.


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[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

I guess you just need thick scales in this industry, against both people and other mermaids.

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[Mer-Crazy]

I just don't understand why we are talking about it all, it has nothing to do with any of us in the first place. It's just comes across as gossipy and harsh.

The thing is though a lot of people on this thread are clients and many of us have the opportunity to develop a bond or friendship with Raven over the course of our orders, so when someone upsets her, someone whom most of us view as an exceptionally sweet person, we all feel a little defensive because someone upset our friend. I think it's the reason some people are getting so worked up about it all.

[AniaR]

I'd be devastated to find out I had people talking about me behind my back on a forum who didn't know what was actually going on. I mean that from both a clients perspective and a tail makers.

It's a fair point. But I think this all started when someone decided to do exactly what you say... in a video. Without telling Raven any of it, and causing all kinds of crazy replies, and then blocking her from being able to share her side of the story. I appreciate from the outside it can be frustrating to see things spill over into the forum, but if she'd simply emailed her about her unhappiness with things/concerns to begin with, there'd be no need for any of this.

I could totally understand a video if Raven acted like a jerk, ignored emails, or said no, or anything. BUt she never even had the chance to say or do anything. And when you have 1000's of mermaids on your profile, that stuff spreads like wildfire.

Anyway you just hit 10 posts lol. you really are new. I'm sorry your first introduction to the forum is drama. but there's lot of great resources here for your mermaid journey!

[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

I've been on the forum on and off many years, my mermaiding has been a stop and start journey. I do a lot of reading, and I've seen the dynamic change over the years. I just don't comment or post as it's a bit intimidating. I don't think I'm the only one that feels that way. It's very cliquey on here. Like a school yard with the popular kids, the bullies and the quiet nerds. I'm just a quiet nerd.

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[LouLouBelle]

Like a school yard with the popular kids, the bullies and the quiet nerds. I'm just a quiet nerd.

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That's definitely not the worst group to be in!



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[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

That's definitely not the worst group to be in!



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I don't think so either

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[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

But I guess that ties in with what I was saying... "I'm a newer mermaid so my opinion doesn't matter" is the exact feel this forum seems to portray.
Which is why I commented in the first place, as a newer mermaid, to point out how bitchy you are all coming across with all the gossip and name calling.
It's not doing the mermaid community any favours.
Anyway, I'll just fade back off to my quiet little lurker corner now and read some actual helpful threads.


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[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

The thing is though a lot of people on this thread are clients and many of us have the opportunity to develop a bond or friendship with Raven over the course of our orders, so when someone upsets her, someone whom most of us view as an exceptionally sweet person, we all feel a little defensive because someone upset our friend. I think it's the reason some people are getting so worked up about it all.

Yeah that's fair, friendship is friendship. But is a public forum the place to bad mouth another mermaid in the process? Yes I know it's a "she started it" situation but that doesn't make it right. Wouldn't a nice message to Raven be more appropriate? Have you personally seen the video?

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[AniaR]

There's a difference between bad mouthing and point out lies. Again, no one name called, or said anything about what type of person she must be, or shared rumours about her. Just the validated fact that she lied.

And the forum was YES created so people had a place to deal with that stuff. Literally, this forum was created because Mertailor would try to keep people from saying anything bad, by ANY means possible.

When you called yourself a newbie mermaid, I assumed that meant you were new, which was why I tried to make a welcoming comment. It wasn't bitchy, and no one said your opinion didn't matter. No one ever says that to new folk. Pretty much the opposite.

[Mer-Crazy]

Yeah that's fair, friendship is friendship. But is a public forum the place to bad mouth another mermaid in the process? Yes I know it's a "she started it" situation but that doesn't make it right. Wouldn't a nice message to Raven be more appropriate? Have you personally seen the video?

Whether I've seen it or not isn't relevant as I haven't really posted anything about the video or the person in the video other then asking for a link. I didn't bad-mouth anyone, I only posted saying how I felt bad that Raven was upset and I actually did send Raven a message saying how I hoped she was okay and etc.

[NixeTheTropicalMermaid]

Anyway, I wasn't commenting for a big discussion or anything. I'm not really into arguing over the net that much, it's always pointless. Hope you all have a good day/ night.

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