B!TC# IT OUT!

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Originally Posted by TheAutisticMermaid

So today is my birthday...And I don't think I have ever been more sad in my life. I sit here, staring at a computer screen, crying. I have no friends, and no family..and no money. I can't even afford to go buy myself food for the day. I have never been so low in my life, and I just don't understand why. I have done so much good in my life, for others, and for the world, and yet it seems I get repayed by having everything taken away. I have been ripped off by TWO tailmakers, Had money stolen, been kicked out of where I am living for no reason at all, etc.... Karma hates me for some reason, and no matter what good I do, it never gets repaid.

Is this the world we live in? A world that just doesn't care.
If so I think I may just call it quits.
32 years of battles is enough for me...

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I wish there was something I could do to cheer you up!

You do know that karma isn't 'tit for tat', right? It's about learning life lessons. Not being repaid, or paying for other lifetimes' transgressions. Ask yourself what you are supposed to learn from all this...once you learn the lesson that life is trying to teach you, you can move past it!

This also applies to the good times, too...when things are going well, ask yourself what you did right to get there, so you can do it again.

This probably isn't what you want to hear right now, but if you just take a little time to just be...be here, now...sit in a space where you can feel the weather on your skin, feel the rise and fall of your breathing, listen to your heart beating in your chest...Just let these things fill your consciousness and let everything else fall away.

You are here. You are loved by people you don't even know. You are alive and that's a good thing. Birthdays are meaningless, really, it's another day in the spiral. Relax.

It's up to you to rise above your woes, only you can do that.

Please keep breathing. Things will get better. I promise.

:hug:

Thank you for the support, guys. It picks me up more than you realize.

TheAutisicMermaid, I know this might not mean much right now but happy birthday. I hope your day gets better.

On another note, I have food poisoning and keep going back and forth between feeling better and wanting to remove my stomach. For all future festivals I am either eating at home before I leave or I'm pigging out on funnel cake. That was the one thing that didn't make me sick.

My mom passed away Sept. 30th, and I just want to lay down and fade out of existence. She had just turned 51 two weeks earlier. My kids are 3 and 1 and have to grow up without their grandmother. I feel like my insides are full of broken glass.

I am so sorry to read this, Celaeno. You are in my heart and my thoughts.

:hug:

Sorry to hear about that lost my dad and grandma within two months it does get better

I'm so sorry to hear that. :(

Somehow I always manage to work myself into positions, beliefs, circumstances, and experiences contrary to my beliefs. And it's always the weirdest stuff, somehow I'm getting depressed over the fact I'll never be a legit anthropomorphic animal. Tell that to middle-school me, who was very withdrawn/bullied/depressed, and I'm sure he would have laughed at me.

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Originally Posted by Takahao

Somehow I always manage to work myself into positions, beliefs, circumstances, and experiences contrary to my beliefs. And it's always the weirdest stuff, somehow I'm getting depressed over the fact I'll never be a legit anthropomorphic animal. Tell that to middle-school me, who was very withdrawn/bullied/depressed, and I'm sure he would have laughed at me.

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But you're incorrect! You already are! Well...in a way...you are a reverse anthropomorphic animal.

Believe me. I'm from the future and I know how this all turns out.

I hope this cheers you up a little! :mermaid kiss:

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Originally Posted by Celaeno

My mom passed away Sept. 30th, and I just want to lay down and fade out of existence. She had just turned 51 two weeks earlier. My kids are 3 and 1 and have to grow up without their grandmother. I feel like my insides are full of broken glass.

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I am so sorry :( a few mers have lost their moms in the past few years. it's awful

Just came across this...

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?sto...55321054585136

Genuinely really disappointed in Diving Specials.

Celaeno - *hugs* I know things are really shitty right now, but just concentrate on one day at a time. Hug your beautiful kids and tell them how much you love them. Look at them and see how special they are. And let yourself grieve. I know the overall situation isn't exactly great... but just concentrate on what you have to.

Concentrate on yourself, your kids, and your mum. You've got enough there without anything else. The rest might be hard, but it's not really important at the end of the day - not in comparison to your family.

You will get through this, as hard and heartbreaking as it might be. And I think I can quite safely say you've got the whole uk merpod behind you. ❤️

I think there will be a lot of hugs all round at the December meet up.




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Just found out that my boyfriend is graduating on time (he previously thought he had to take an extra semester), which is AMAZING! However, he's applying for an internship in Texas, which is over 1,000 miles away from where we are now. I've still got at least a year and a half until I graduate, which means we'll have to be long distance until I graduate and can move to texas with him.
This isn't for sure yet, because he hasn't applied for the internship yet, and it's not 100% that he'll get it, but I have a feeling he will since he has always gotten good grades and he's a really hard worker.
But the thought of only being able to see him every few months is KILLING me. We live together now so I'm used to seeing him every day, and I love living with him. We're so happy right now.
I'm just gonna miss him so much and I'm scared because so many people break up in these kinds of situations.

Thanks everyone. I can't believe she's been gone for a month. A month into forever without her. It's hard to not be envious when I see other people with their mothers, or when friends talk about getting to see or be with their mothers. She was the only parent I had, my kids have no grandparents on my side now. And my mom was the grandparent they spent the most time with and who was the most involved in their lives. It's so brutally unfair.

Husbands wreck ended up totalling the car, so he drove the truck to work (think I said this already) for two days and the alternator went out.
He has been driving my car to and from work for a week or two now.
Tonight while at the store, we noticed my car was over revving and not wanting to shift up and having a hard time accelerating.

Probably transmission.

I swear, we have had the worst luck this year besides our son being born!

My dad, our horses, vehicles, hot water heater went out, dryer went out, water leaks, and our septic tank pretty much exploded underground.

How are we supposed to get ahead or get anywhere when every time we make progress to our goals, we get hit with something that knocks us so far back that it's like starting from scratch?

I am so done with school right now. My friends are trying to set me up with a date for sadies. Like;
1. The girl is supposed to ask
2. Last time they tried this they realised how many guys can't stand me, and vice versa.
3. Literally I have no guy friends I would like to ask, and I am NOT going with a stranger 😱

I don't want to have to fight with them on this again. I have no interest in the guys at my school, and it would be so awkward to ask anybody. I used to be super outgoing, and charismatic, but I've changed. I don't really like who I am now, I know if I was who I used to be, I would have a bunch of friends to ask.

I'm just so done with being reminded that the person I changed into is less than who I was. I just want them to leave me alone about school dances, and dating. :/

So, my dad decided to surprise me with a visit from my mom with Borderline Personality Disorder. My day got ruined a little too early, if you ask me.

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wow, what a great way to start out my day.... I walked into my dad's office to tell him something and what is the first thing that comes out of his mouth? "How much weight have you put on?" and he proceeds to lecture me saying that "No one will want to be friends with you because you're overweight and No guys will want to date you because you're overweight, that is just the way it is"
well fuck you too dad. My day was going fine until you started to obsess over my weight. I mean yeah I put on some weight after I quit the 1,005 calorie a day diet, But I am already obsessing over my weight and I don't need you to fucking tell me i'm a fat ass and i won't have any friends or get a guy because i'm disgustingly fat.

My friend might've had her laptop stolen :/ Another laptop to have gone missing.

Oh wow... Hey Pearlie you should link them to this:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/4702156...FYQxaQodeCoDAg
:lol:

HAHAHA!

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So, my dad decided to surprise me with a visit from my mom with Borderline Personality Disorder. My day got ruined a little too early, if you ask me.

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I know that feeling, your dad sounds like an enabler. Sorry you have to deal with that

Well Clara Mermaid, I have to say your dad really fudged up. He probably wanted to help, but what he did was seriously not the right thing to do. I had a similar problem with my dad when it came to me not getting a degree. Of course he was trying to help me go the way he thought was best, but it didn't help when he didn't even respect the path I was walking, or am walking. What I did was not talk to him about it. If he brought it up, I'd end the conversation by giving him only one word answers (yes, no, okay), and find something else to do. If he was talking about something pleasant or at least we both agreed, I talked for as long as I could. He seems to have got that if he wants to talk, he can't make me feel like dirt.

As for PearlieMae's comment on "you'll be able to get a boyfriend as long as you have a va," I disagree. Not that you won't find a boyfriend, but that it takes more then that. I'm not talking about just looks (by the way, you look just fine as far as I can see), but personality, character, and many other things that can make you a wonderful person to be around. Sure, men are very visual, and we do think about a certain activity a lot, but those areas are far from the only things we care about, even early in a relationship and especially later on. Don't know if I talked too much, but I hope I helped.

(I was trying to be salty...lighten the mood. :) )

((EDIT: POST EDITED BY ADMIN FOR OFFENSIVE RACIST CONTENT USED TO BULLY OTHER MEMBERS. USER HAS BEEN BANNED.))

why the hell are you still here


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I am so sad to see Dan H turn so hateful, I am not sure why he is being this way but I've seen a lot of hateful posts from him- there were some hateful posts on merman christian's recent merdia coverage and neither christian and I have spoken with him since I dont know... february? I sincerely feel someone is manipulating him, it's a shame. Not really sure what spurned him on, he was always so kind- one of the kindest people I knew. But really low brow to even joke about the KKK in a time like this

and ps, my city loves me :D lol BFFs with the mayor, so eat that.

Wtf? Someone is seriously jealous! It really hurts me to see someone who was super nice turn into a absolute jerk. But how the hell is he still allowed on here!


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he wont be the second a mod is online.

This is all cuz of mermania. Certain people behind the scenes keeps trying to drum up drama, and I knew I would become a target when I stepped in after other people stepped out. But whatever, all the stupid memes in the world aren't going to stop this event from being awesome. :D

AniaR, you are amazing! I wish you all the luck for Mermaina!!!!


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What just happened? Wait, never mind. Probably better off not knowing. Hope what ever it was wasn't some kind of threat.

I've been fairly absent lately. Hugs to all!

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Ugg. I normally stay at the daycare during the day while I am off so I can work on stuff and not drive home and back each day. Now, 3 months later, they are telling me I cannot. Management is on vacation and the owner only wants people there who are on the clock. Not clear if that's for just while they are gone or after they get back too. Oh and I can't teach the first aid/cpr class I have been teaching until they come back. Started the class almost a month ago and we have only met for 2 days, each about 90 minutes. No reason for not teaching the class except for "My preference" and they are going to give me more info until they get back because my director does not wish to spend her week on "trivial matters".

This is the second time I have run a Facebook ad and I have realized its not worth the negative posts people make. WTF!

Attachment 39522

Maybe Nik thinks that because they're into it. Seriously. Normal people dont look at a kid and think, child porn!

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Originally Posted by AniaR

Maybe Nik thinks that because they're into it. Seriously. Normal people dont look at a kid and think, child porn!

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Weirdo. I see that they are a Chef at a local restaurant, guess I won't be dining there. LOL

My last ad ran, I had some old guy tell me to fuck off and get off his newsfeed. LOL

I'm a sick mer :( I've thrown up 4 times in the past 4 hours, I can't keep anything down, not even liquids.

This week has been hell. My immediate boss (who is also my friend) got worried about me because I stated I might need to get to a hospital (I've got depression and SI is not uncommon for me, though with coping skills I do not act upon them.) She told head of nursing and the big boss (not out of malice, but to make a plan for me just in case... so I understand and Im not mad about that.)

A patient tried to file a grievance against me because I was not doing well and was not perky and happy enough for them while I was working to get them what they wanted at work.

I've not slept well and it's only been the last 2-3 days that I have woken up and not been crying or not mad that I had woken up.

And the lovely cherry on top is my body issues coming up again as I had to retake measurements today.

More hugs to the merfolk! This has been a doozy of a year.

Also, just need to rant. I'm a college freshman on the other side of the country from my family, tomorrow is my birthday and while I have made several friends, I'm not really close with them yet. I am feeling very isolated.

I have also not gone swimming since I got here

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Originally Posted by Sabrina the Selkie

More hugs to the merfolk! This has been a doozy of a year.

Also, just need to rant. I'm a college freshman on the other side of the country from my family, tomorrow is my birthday and while I have made several friends, I'm not really close with them yet. I am feeling very isolated.

I have also not gone swimming since I got here

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I am sorry...I have considered going across the country to school too and I had that fear...just keep your head up and I am sure you will get many Happy Birthday wishes to make you feel better!


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Originally Posted by Sabrina the Selkie

More hugs to the merfolk! This has been a doozy of a year.

Also, just need to rant. I'm a college freshman on the other side of the country from my family, tomorrow is my birthday and while I have made several friends, I'm not really close with them yet. I am feeling very isolated.

I have also not gone swimming since I got here

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Happy birthday Sabrina!

Thanks, guys!

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