The Drama Thread (WARNING: DRAMA AHEAD)

[MermaidMorganna]

Does Anna brown have access to this??

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Im pretty sure she’s been banned.

[WickedlyGoodSeaWitch]

Does Anna brown have access to this??

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile appI hope she does. I have a few Choice words for her but she's too much of a coward to face me, because she knows what she did to me was wrong! Instead she sends her minions to attack and gaslight on her behalf. And you were just talking about how she pulled you into some sort of mess on another group on Facebook- and you were swearing up and down that you had nothing to do with Anna. You also applied to be an admin for Mermaid Mania...I hope your intentions are true for them.

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[Scottish Clara]

I did, was asking if she had access to this as I was going ask advice in regards about her and the tail I am making..... But if it gets back to her then she can attack me like she has others and I am up to dealing with more drama. Hence why asking if she had access to mernetwork??

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[Scottish Clara]

*not up to

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[Scottish Clara]

And just so you know... The tail I am mentioning is being made for Anna. But due the recent YouTube video she made about the finfolk neoprene tails and how shitty she commented on the "bad qaulity" it makes me worried for the silicone tail I am making for her.

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[Mermaid Whisper]

At this point the situation has gotten out of control and is the same struggles repeated over and over again. It might be good to take it up in PMs so as to not be so permanent and public.


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[AniaR]

The drama thread can only be viewed by members. But that doesn't stop other people from screenshotting and sending to her :/

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[PearlieMae]

And just so you know... The tail I am mentioning is being made for Anna. But due the recent YouTube video she made about the finfolk neoprene tails and how shitty she commented on the "bad qaulity" it makes me worried for the silicone tail I am making for her.

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I WOULD CANCEL HER TAIL ORDER AND REFUND HER ANYTHING SHE'S PAID YOU!!! RUNNNN!!!!!!!!!!

[PearlieMae]

At this point the situation has gotten out of control and is the same struggles repeated over and over again. It might be good to take it up in PMs so as to not be so permanent and public.


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It should be permanent and public so others can be warned of what a trainwreck she is.

[AniaR]

the drama thread is private so it's not indexed on google because people lob untruths etc. (Like the attack on Kristan) plus when people google mernetwork you don't want it to be the first thing to come up lol

[MerQueen Nerissa]

I WOULD CANCEL HER TAIL ORDER AND REFUND HER ANYTHING SHE'S PAID YOU!!! RUNNNN!!!!!!!!!!

I second this!! I made her a tail and she was a nightmare to work with.


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[Jessabelle27]

The drama thread can only be viewed by members. But that doesn't stop other people from screenshotting and sending to her :/

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It also doesn't stop her from creating an alias account to lurk unfortunately :/

She was part of a popular buy/sell mermaid group on facebook. I noticed she started turning over a lot of fabric tails and monofins quickly, and only using stock photos from ebay to display a higher price than what was available on amazon or in stores. I mentioned this in a comment on her thread and she instantly blocked me. Obviously the girl has some demons she needs to deal with.

[Mermaid Vee]

Did anyone see Athena's post on the pros Facebook page (About her convention), I wonder if anyone in tat group will bite...

[AniaR]

$100 for a weekend of events that are typically free or low cost with swimming for 2 hours on the last day.

For insight, mermania didn't cost $100 lol

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[Mermaid Vee]

$100 for a weekend of events that are typically free or low cost with swimming for 2 hours on the last day.

For insight, mermania didn't cost $100 lol

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wow, this people are out of control...

[TybeeMermaid]

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So I noticed Anna's trying to sell stuff again.

[mermaid_stardust]

Eww

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[Mermaid Persephone]

Maybe she's selling it because she's finally getting out of the mermaid community... I can always hope.

[KatieScottArt]

I just want to know how she can "strip it's current color" from a silicone Mertailor tail. What sorcery is this??

[PhaylennMurúch]

this is also the tail she glued finfolk scales and gemstones to, I think she may have also put a few aftermarket fins on that bad boy. There is no way that it's not damaged. That picture isn't even the actual picture of the tail. it's of a different mer and tail

[PhaylennMurúch]

And just so you know... The tail I am mentioning is being made for Anna. But due the recent YouTube video she made about the finfolk neoprene tails and how shitty she commented on the "bad qaulity" it makes me worried for the silicone tail I am making for her.

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whatever money she sent you, send it back and run for the hills. She'll do to you what she did to a ton of other folks

[AniaR]

I just want to know how she can "strip it's current color" from a silicone Mertailor tail. What sorcery is this??

she cant

[KatieScottArt]

she cant

That was my suspicion. WIZARDRY!

[Mermaid Vee]

Damn... yeah there pictures somewhere of what she did with that tail (added scales and 'gems') but it didn't look good, so I can't imagine the product one wouldreceive

[TybeeMermaid]

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It is the tail she "glued" stuff to but apparently it's still "the same as it was before". I'm willing to bet it's all messed up and she's hoping to disguise it under a layer of paint.

[AniaR]

there's pics of it here. I'm sure of it. lol

[Mermaid Kana'ina]

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Is this the tail you are talking about Raina? Looks like there is a huge chance of it being damaged, the work looks sloppy at best.

[Mermaid Kana'ina]

Also she just put the tail up for sale on eBay....

[Mermaid Vee]

Yeah that’s the one! Yeah chances of damage is huge since she used silipoxy to adhere the scales. So they would leave a behind imprints of colorless/cloudy silicone in the areas the scales were added to

[PearlieMae]

:fallover:

[TybeeMermaid]

Yeah, there's no way that's not damaged. Also, I was looking at her eBay listing and she's using the previous buyer's photo again. Plus she added a disclaimer that's kinda concerning.

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Here's the link to the actual listing if anyone wants to see more: [link] (https://www.ebay.com/itm/Mertailor-Basic-Silicone-Mermaid-Tail/253443481990?hash=item3b0268a186:g:ObAAAOSwIDtajmB 6)

[Mermaid Vee]

Yeah, there's no way that's not damaged. Also, I was looking at her eBay listing and she's using the previous buyer's photo again. Plus she added a disclaimer that's kinda concerning.

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Here's the link to the actual listing if anyone wants to see more: [link] (https://www.ebay.com/itm/Mertailor-Basic-Silicone-Mermaid-Tail/253443481990?hash=item3b0268a186:g:ObAAAOSwIDtajmB 6)
Yeah, and she has no there pictures which makes it worse... I wish this girl would just disappear. I feel bad for anyone who buys this not knowing its state, and their dreams are ruined

[Mermaid Persephone]

She says she has more pictures available of the current condition of the tail, but doesn't. I reported it as fraudulent for that reason. I suggest others do the same. If she reposts with pictures of the current conditions, that's one thing... but the "no return" bogus policy along with her lying about the conditions makes it scamming.

[TybeeMermaid]

She says she has more pictures available of the current condition of the tail, but doesn't. I reported it as fraudulent for that reason. I suggest others do the same. If she reposts with pictures of the current conditions, that's one thing... but the "no return" bogus policy along with her lying about the conditions makes it scamming.

Yeah, I reported it too. It makes me sad because I saw there were already 3 bids on it! These people have no idea about the history of who they're buying from!

[PhaylennMurúch]

It’s gone

[Ransom]

Gone and I hope for the right reason. Not posting pics of the item as customers will get it should set off all kinds of alarms.

Just wondering though, where did the pics of the scale-things attached come from, Kana'ina?

[Mermaid Kana'ina]

She made a post about it in the Finfolk Pod Squad. The tail had Finfolk scales, black diamonds, a pearl and a raw ruby attached to it. Honestly I doubt that any of the "gemstones" were real, I think she said that just for shock value and to drive the price up.


Gone and I hope for the right reason. Not posting pics of the item as customers will get it should set off all kinds of alarms.

Just wondering though, where did the pics of the scale-things attached come from, Kana'ina?

[mermaid_kairi]

Yeah, it was so sad to see finfolk scales used that way and it's unbelievable she would try to sell it after all that.

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[Mermaid Kana'ina]

Honestly I'm not even surprised, with all the scams that she's pulled over her time in the mer world I'm impressed that it took her this long to try to scam a tail.


Yeah, it was so sad to see finfolk scales used that way and it's unbelievable she would try to sell it after all that.

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[Mermaid_Calla]

Okay, nobody panic! I'm Mermaid Calla Lily from California, hi all. :)

So I came across this listing just yesterday and despite numerous warnings, I've purchased it from her. I can confirm that it's Anna Brown, whatever her other aliases may be. The listing is gone because I offered her 500 for the tail if she removed the listing, but she wouldn't take 500 and charged me only 400 and threw in the fins to go with it. Now let me tell you why I did this, as although I'm new to the mermaiding thing I'm far from new to the online shopping situation. Although she closed out the sale on eBay, we still made the transaction through the Paypal marketplace which has its own version of buyer protection. I have screenshots of the eBay ad as well as the note she attached to the transaction detailing everything we discussed and she included in the sale. I also have screenshots of our correspondence regarding the item, so at the absolute worst I will at least be able to get my money back if the tail is really beyond saving. Also, the no refund disclaimer is indefensible if the item is not as described or arrives with significant damage, and both eBay and Paypal tend to side with the buyer 9 times out of 10 when it comes to disputes. If there wasn't such a low risk to me, I would be very anxious right now lol.

However, this may be a tale of two birds and one stone; I'll be taking it off the marketplace so that hopefully, if it turns out awful, nobody else will have been duped into buying it. Additionally, even if it's damaged I will probably be able to salvage it in some form. I have never made a mermaid tail, but I do make costumes and props for cosplay and I'm no stranger to working with silicone and plastics. Between me and my husband, even if it turns out to be overpriced trash I'm fairly certain I'll be able to at least make it presentable. Anyhow, when or if I receive the tail I'll post an update on here somewhere to satisfy everybody's curiosity. :p

I know how silly I sound, and I know I'm going out on a limb here, but I've made my peace with the possibilities so now all that's left to do is see what happens.

[MermaidAiera]

Anyhow, when or if I receive the tail I'll post an update on here somewhere to satisfy everybody's curiosity.

I pray it works out for you. I have faith in your artistic abilities, but it still sucks if you buy a major fixer-upper that costs a ton just to make it look good for the same price as a brand new tail in some cases. Regardless of what happens, I hope you end up satisfied ^^ I'll be looking out for your updates.

[BlueCorvidae]

I hope you have your Facebook and everything else set to private, should you have to file a PayPal dispute.

[РусалкаАнна]

Tail pretty I think.

[PearlieMae]

Tail pretty I think.

Nice try Anna. No one believes this isn't you. Next time, don't name yourself Anna in Cyrillic.

[Mermaid Holly]

Does anyone else find it even a little bit comedic that this entire thread is all about Anna/Athena/whatever she goes by? Just me...?

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[PearlieMae]

Hahaha! You need to dig deeper. The pre-anna stuff is dramatic, too.

[Mermaid Kane]

Nice try Anna. No one believes this isn't you. Next time, don't name yourself Anna in Cyrillic.

You don't know that for sure. Ask an admin to check the IP, and look through her old posts. Make sure before you attempt to call someone out, because IF you are wrong, damage can be done. Just saying.

She makes a good point though. Can an admin check the IP?

[Winged Mermaid]

Yes, please don't make assumptions about any users. If you have concerns, please contact an admin or mod first! РусалкаАнна is in Russia, they are not any alt account of Anna's. Their IP has been consistent and run through a proxy checker, and found to not be a known proxy.

[PearlieMae]

My bad.

Although I'm not 100% convinced.

[Mermaid_Izzy]

My bad.

Although I'm not 100% convinced.

If you would go look at her previous post it might help ease your suspicion.


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[Mermaid Kane]

My bad.

Although I'm not 100% convinced.

Why not?

[AniaR]

probably because she's still going crazy on FB with her alts, and I mean this is the girl we suspect of taking the site down so I wouldn't be surprised if she got around her IP ban.

I agree that the Russian account looks suspicious, glad Iona checked it out. Anna continues to reference mernetwork drama and bash the members here as if she's still active.

[gay-mermaid]

probably because she's still going crazy on FB with her alts, and I mean this is the girl we suspect of taking the site down so I wouldn't be surprised if she got around her IP ban.

I agree that the Russian account looks suspicious, glad Iona checked it out. Anna continues to reference mernetwork drama and bash the members here as if she's still active.
she needs to like...close her computer and just...take a long walk. have a nice bath. pet a dog. she is making internet drama her life and she really needs to take a step back

[Mermaid Kane]

probably because she's still going crazy on FB with her alts, and I mean this is the girl we suspect of taking the site down so I wouldn't be surprised if she got around her IP ban.

I agree that the Russian account looks suspicious, glad Iona checked it out. Anna continues to reference mernetwork drama and bash the members here as if she's still active.
O, reasonable enough. Didn't think of that.

[shimmygoddess]

Isnt it possible to get a fake IP address for anywhere? I feel like my son did that when he was buying and selling user names for some game and he didnt want to be found out..LOL

[Mermaid Oona]

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Is this the tail you are talking about Raina? Looks like there is a huge chance of it being damaged, the work looks sloppy at best.Look to say if she put those scales on correctly it would not be bad but the " tail making " experts she's is listening too is either sabotaging her work or they really don't know what they are doing she should ignore them. But this is terrible this poor tail deserves better than this!

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[AniaR]

Look to say if she put those scales on correctly it would not be bad but the " tail making " experts she's is listening too is either sabotaging her work or they really don't know what they are doing she should ignore them. But this is terrible this poor tail deserves better than this!

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She doesn't listen to any experts, lol. She runs a group where she doles out "advice" she isn't qualified to give, honestly, sabotaging others.

This is mer-goldie's old tail that was sold on here before Anna got it. Those scales wont stick to it, and yes they will damage it coming off, and no, it can't be easily repainted.

[Mermaid Oona]

She doesn't listen to any experts, lol. She runs a group where she doles out "advice" she isn't qualified to give, honestly, sabotaging others.

This is mer-goldie's old tail that was sold on here before Anna got it. Those scales wont stick to it, and yes they will damage it coming off, and no, it can't be easily repainted.It's just sad she made a name for herself this way... I read so far about her and it's sad. I don't like to hate people and I try to find the positives. This could be the only way she gets attention.... I feel bad for her

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[PhaylennMurúch]

Isnt it possible to get a fake IP address for anywhere? I feel like my son did that when he was buying and selling user names for some game and he didnt want to be found out..LOL

Yeah, VPNs are free/cheap and browsers like Opera have them standard. My DH regularly uses one and his IPs ping from every country except this one. It’s easy to buy a foreign IP to use on forums like this one.

[jukumerboii]

Wooooooow!

[AniaR]

^oh great, when can we expect the next ill-informed video rant while crying "if you don't like what I say don't read my stuff" while also flipping out whenever anyone points out the hypocrisy on their page. :shark:

[jukumerboii]

Silly Raina 😂😂😂

[inanna]

Silly Raina 

raina isn't being silly. she's serious. this whole thing is no joke and about as messed up as the death threats over mermania.

[Mermaid Kane]

raina isn't being silly. she's serious. this whole thing is no joke and about as messed up as the death threats over mermania.

I'm obviously missing something. The three posts above seem to come out of the blue? What happened?

[inanna]

i don't remember if i found the info here or on raina's youtube, but death threats over mermania imploding at one point.

poster was calling raina silly when she mentioned another ill-informed video, as one exists that is full of flawed information that hangs her out to dry.

[AniaR]

yeah that's what certain people do in the community sadly. just show up to stir the pot, so they never make any sense. Or is it smoke it? hmmm

[jukumerboii]

Lol still silly!! Why so serious if this is a DRAMA THREAD?!? 😂😂 OMG who made death threats at Mermania?? I was there at both and don't remember anything about death threats?!?! Y'all are so funny!! Should get a show on comedy central or something!

[Mermaid Yuki]

yes. drama thread this is so you perfect for here. you fail at show on comedy central. were you tosh.o joke of the week? some serious on drama thread as we want be known as not sorry mermaid.


Lol still silly!! Why so serious if this is a DRAMA THREAD?!?  OMG who made death threats at Mermania?? I was there at both and don't remember anything about death threats?!?! Y'all are so funny!! Should get a show on comedy central or something!

[Mermaid Ankhali]

Wait I'm sorry back up can we go back to the DEATH THREAT about MERMANIA? Who the fluke does that?


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[SeaGlass Siren]

There wasn’t any death threats. Just assaults.

[AniaR]

Joke of the week. LOL. I'm dead. No worries folks, this is all I hear:

https://media1.giphy.com/media/6t3ISgOPaNaeY/giphy.gif

I have moved onnnnn from the mermania BS.

[AniaR]

well I mean blix here did say Venessa and I should be thrown is a gas chamber because of mermania, you know, on the anniversary of the holocaust. That's probably where that came from.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Oh.... “over” and “about” versus “AT mermania.”

Stay in school kids!

[PearlieMae]

http://replygif.net/i/1563.gif

[Mermaid Kane]

http://replygif.net/i/1563.gif

me

[jukumerboii]

Yuki u sound crazy!
Andrea u still a fan I see, since u correcting me, correct Yuki too while u at it! That's why I'm still Yemayas son AF😝!
Raina u just 🙃 silly. U really think I KNEW about that holocaust anniversary?!? See how u like adding in stuff that don't belong!?! Ur such a narcissist its amazing!
Pearlie I'm so over u riding my waves, I need to mail u a pic with my signature so u can hang it on your wall!
&last time I checked, the joke of the week merman was a white guy, not me, so that wasn't even a qualified joke to use capital LOL and claim that you died of laughter! 😂 It was weak! I got time to be PETTY y'all!!! I can really take over this if I wanted too!

[Mermaid Kane]

Interesting person, this one... *Picks up popcorn and prepares for the "fun"*

[RomanLaveau]

Here for the reads honestly! Mermaid Myspace is so much fun.

[Prince Calypso]

well I mean blix here did say Venessa and I should be thrown is a gas chamber because of mermania, you know, on the anniversary of the holocaust. That's probably where that came from.

I believe he say "Yall pussies" should be sentenced to the gas chamber.
I believe we discussed this once before Raina, in the comments of one of Eric's post. Eric was quoting lines from a popular trans media personality named TS Madison. look her up. she does a show on Facebook called the queens court where she and another black media star trash talk and roast celebrities in make believe court sessions complete with handing out sentencing for these celebrities "crimes"
was it appropriate to say those things no but comedy isn't meant to be appropriate, but neither was a death threat against you or anyone else.
now if you took offense then fine, that's understandable but don't try to make it out to be something it was never intended to be

[AniaR]

I didn't say anything about a death threat, I quoted exactly what was said, he said our names, THEN ya'll pussies, then thrown in a gas chamber, ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF THE HOLOCAUST. It's his responsibility to know wtf he is talking about before he throws it out there."he didn't mean it that way" AND? it's not like Eric gives a fu*ck about anyone else or truth or loyalty. Idgaf about him hiding behind "comedy". it's sad people keep defending his behaviour instead of "whoa bro, too far" but literally have no problem saying that to anyone who holds him accountable He's a sexist and comments like that are anti-semetic. Should probably give credit to the various women who created opportunities for him and built him up but instead lies on social media and blocks anyone who tries to correct him. I mean, you can go ahead, align yourself, it all comes out in the wash :) I'm fine if he keeps his shit on his page. I don't see it. But when he starts going after people on their stuff - especially a member of MY team, it's not his opinion or comedy, is insanity. If he wants to be known for going on and on on youtube videos that are lucky to break 300 views, that's none of my business. But don't complain and blame literally everyone else when ya can't get gigs, people think you're an asshole, and throw a tantrum people think you're a shit "role model". Role model of what? complaining 24/7????
Cant wait to be the next subject in the three part rant video that will probably get repeated another month from now with more defense of using knock off tails lol! Happy to provide something of interest for once to be talked about. It's been getting stale

[SeaGlass Siren]

.... Fan of what Eric? I blocked and unfollowed u everywhere lol.

Kenny, it not much of a read if he don’t know what he’s talking about.

[Prince Calypso]

I didn't say anything about a death threat, I quoted exactly what was said, he said our names, THEN ya'll pussies, then thrown in a gas chamber, ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF THE HOLOCAUST. It's his responsibility to know wtf he is talking about before he throws it out there."he didn't mean it that way" AND? it's not like Eric gives a fu*ck about anyone else or truth or loyalty. Idgaf about him hiding behind "comedy". it's sad people keep defending his behaviour instead of "whoa bro, too far" but literally have no problem saying that to anyone who holds him accountable He's a sexist and comments like that are anti-semetic. Should probably give credit to the various women who created opportunities for him and built him up but instead lies on social media and blocks anyone who tries to correct him. I mean, you can go ahead, align yourself, it all comes out in the wash :) I'm fine if he keeps his shit on his page. I don't see it. But when he starts going after people on their stuff - especially a member of MY team, it's not his opinion or comedy, is insanity. If he wants to be known for going on and on on youtube videos that are lucky to break 300 views, that's none of my business. But don't complain and blame literally everyone else when ya can't get gigs, people think you're an asshole, and throw a tantrum people think you're a shit "role model". Role model of what? complaining 24/7????
Cant wait to be the next subject in the three part rant video that will probably get repeated another month from now with more defense of using knock off tails lol! Happy to provide something of interest for once to be talked about. It's been getting stale
no one is making excuses for Eric. no one is saying what he said was politically correct or anything of the type. I'm simply saying that you and I talk about this once before and your trying to spend what he said was a death threat when that wasn't what it was. People did tell Eric that joke was little too far but the damage had already been done. it was said and out there. also lot of people were not aware of the fact that it was the Anniversary of The Holocaust. it that an excuse? not but it is fact.
now since Eric has been on here in the comments he hasn't directly said anything threatening to you or call you out for anything. your the one downing on in in every comment you make.
you say your not bothered by him them why respond to him? why bring up his episode on tosh or anything like that. why down on his videos on YouTube? why bring up anything he posted concerning being a role model or anything alone those lines if you aren't bothered by him.
and whats with the "Align yourself" BS. this isn't Game of Thrones. no one is aligning themselves with anyone. it is not us against you and yours.
I'm simply stating fact and yeah Eric and I are friends but we are also both gay black mermen, so we understand each other and a struggle that you have no idea about, both in life and in the mermaid community.
but as Eric's friend i don't just nod my head and agree with everything he says and make judgments based on other people based on that fact

[AniaR]

Yuki u sound crazy!
Andrea u still a fan I see, since u correcting me, correct Yuki too while u at it! That's why I'm still Yemayas son AF!
Raina u just  silly. U really think I KNEW about that holocaust anniversary?!? See how u like adding in stuff that don't belong!?! Ur such a narcissist its amazing!
Pearlie I'm so over u riding my waves, I need to mail u a pic with my signature so u can hang it on your wall!
&last time I checked, the joke of the week merman was a white guy, not me, so that wasn't even a qualified joke to use capital LOL and claim that you died of laughter!  It was weak! I got time to be PETTY y'all!!! I can really take over this if I wanted too!

Time to be petty is pretty much all you got and all your known for. *shrug* and the irony of you calling anyone a narc lol

[AniaR]

I talk about this once before and your trying to spend what he said was a death threat

have not ONCE said that :) someone else did and was corrected. Foggy memory apparently????


why bring up his episode on tosh or anything like that.

I didnt LOL are you just attributing any anti-eric comment to me??? LOL

[AniaR]

but as Eric's friend i don't just nod my head and agree with everything he says and make judgments based on other people based on that fact I can respect that. All I am saying, is a little heads up for when it all comes out.
I think everyone is just tired of the BS. everyone tries to be reasonable with Eric, to acknowledge his points, while putting out facts. and he just lies, and flips the script, jumps into stuff to stir the pot, and harasses people. It's gonna catch up. I don't care what he has to say about *me* but I have a responsibility to protect my team members from his slander for sure. I have a big enough reputation of putting out truth that I am beyond caring who believes at this point. A lot of the people he targets for simply speaking their opinions - in a respectful way no less- don't.

edit to add:
If I accidentally say something racist, it's still racist even if I don't know it. And it's my job to correct that, apologize. I use to call men I know "boy" and had no idea it could be seen as derogatory to black men because racism in Canada is slightly different (Underground railroad vs slavery) so I had no knowledge of that until some people told me. deleted it, apologized, didn't go on about how "I didn't mean it that way" or "I didn't know" just stopped and promised to make sure I don't do it again.

That's what he should do when someone points out the stupidness of making a gas chamber refereed to people who worked their ass off for him, on the anniversary of the holocaust. none of this "oh I didn't know BS". it's anti semetic. Stop, delete, don't do it again.

[RomanLaveau]

.... Fan of what Eric? I blocked and unfollowed u everywhere lol.

Kenny, it not much of a read if he don’t know what he’s talking about.

Did I even mention Eric's name as the one doing the reading? Eric can read yall, Raina can read yall, shit, you can read them. I said I was here for the reads. I'm Eric's friend but I haven't interjected other than to get notifications for this so theres that. Don't try it.

[Prince Calypso]

have not ONCE said that :) someone else did and was corrected. Foggy memory apparently????
I didnt LOL are you just attributing any anti-eric comment to me??? LOL

no my memory is not foggy, so don't get snippy with me.
I'm simply saying that you bring up the gas chamber bit as though it were a direct threat to you, when it been established that Eric wasn't aware that it was the Holocaust Anniversary. that like me getting mad at a straight person for making an inappropriate joke about the twinkie defense on the day of Harvey Milks death. is it right no but can I make the assumption that someone in a completely different walk of life than me knew there was a Harvey Milk day? no i can't.
Eric's first comment on the community in forever was WOOOOOWWW
and you immediately went on the attack instead of just ignoring him. everything he said after that was in response to you going in.
also you say he's block and you don't see what he post but your bringing up a lot of things on his Facebook word for word.
the comment about being a role model, and now the comment about being petty.
you say he's beneath you and not worth your time and yet you get so riled up by him.

[jukumerboii]

OMG. Raina please write a book about me!!! I swear u know of me and my character better than anyone on the planet, including myself!! &to call me sexist and anti-semetic is FUNNY AF! I would rather be called a faggot TBH! I got on ya girl cuz she had no right coming at me for what I was saying on MY instagram! What u need to do is ask her why it all started in the 1st place but I'm sure your brain won't let u. And I'm perfectly fine with my barely 300 views. I make my vids for myself to state how I feel, don't u do the same thing?! Ain't that's what YouTube's for? I don't need 1000s of views. I've already had 1000s of views on other revenues and got PLENTY more coming I'm sure! &yes I have complained about not getting booked and u know damn well it's not cuz of my mouth or complain 247,,, it's cuz IM BLACK and the black merm struggle is something you white merms will NEVER understand! Point blank period! At the end of the day, miss Canadian mermaid, u keep forgetting y'all put me in neverland because of my mouth remember! Remember how y'all hyped me up so bad to talk shit FOR YALL cuz ya didn't have the balls to do it yourself??!! & your still a liar and a narcissist! Like I said, I got time and plenty of PETTY to go around! I'm still waiting on u to show this 3 part angry video I made too 😂😂😂 liar liar tail on fire!!!

[RomanLaveau]

....and whats with the "Align yourself" BS. this isn't Game of Thrones. no one is aligning themselves with anyone. it is not us against you and yours.

Chile, with these females, its your either on their side 100% or youre against them. There is no you thinking on your own and not picking sides, its black and white with em. They will not get the black thing, deadass

[AniaR]

I'm simply saying that you bring up the gas chamber bit as though it were a direct threat to you,
No actually, someone ELSE said a death threat was made to me, and I explained that it probably originated from the drama over that comment :)

if reference to the actual comment, please see the edit I added to my post.



edit to add:
If I accidentally say something racist, it's still racist even if I don't know it. And it's my job to correct that, apologize. I use to call men I know "boy" and had no idea it could be seen as derogatory to black men because racism in Canada is slightly different (Underground railroad vs slavery) so I had no knowledge of that until some people told me. deleted it, apologized, didn't go on about how "I didn't mean it that way" or "I didn't know" just stopped and promised to make sure I don't do it again.

That's what he should do when someone points out the stupidness of making a gas chamber refereed to people who worked their ass off for him, on the anniversary of the holocaust. none of this "oh I didn't know BS". it's anti semetic. Stop, delete, don't do it again.

it's hypocritical to speak out on racism but make an exception for a very inappropriately timed holocaust reference. Not sure why no one is willing to be accountable for that one?

[AniaR]

Chile, with these females, its your either on their side 100% or youre against them. There is no you thinking on your own and not picking sides, its black and white with em. They will not get the black thing, deadass

Please, give us the play by play on twitter lol

[Prince Calypso]

I can respect that. All I am saying, is a little heads up for when it all comes out.
I think everyone is just tired of the BS. everyone tries to be reasonable with Eric, to acknowledge his points, while putting out facts. and he just lies, and flips the script, jumps into stuff to stir the pot, and harasses people. It's gonna catch up. I don't care what he has to say about *me* but I have a responsibility to protect my team members from his slander for sure. I have a big enough reputation of putting out truth that I am beyond caring who believes at this point. A lot of the people he targets for simply speaking their opinions - in a respectful way no less- don't.

edit to add:
If I accidentally say something racist, it's still racist even if I don't know it. And it's my job to correct that, apologize. I use to call men I know "boy" and had no idea it could be seen as derogatory to black men because racism in Canada is slightly different (Underground railroad vs slavery) so I had no knowledge of that until some people told me. deleted it, apologized, didn't go on about how "I didn't mean it that way" or "I didn't know" just stopped and promised to make sure I don't do it again.

That's what he should do when someone points out the stupidness of making a gas chamber refereed to people who worked their ass off for him, on the anniversary of the holocaust. none of this "oh I didn't know BS". it's anti semetic. Stop, delete, don't do it again.

Stop, delete, dont do it again?
and has he done or said anything like that since?
no, he hasn't. he was doing a live stream video and said some shit that was kinda not right to say...ok?
he never once denied it or tried to make excuses about it. only thing he didn't to is apologize.
which is is right to do.
just like it your right to still be upset by it.

[AniaR]

OMG. Raina please write a book about me!!! I swear u know of me and my character better than anyone on the planet, including myself!! &to call me sexist and anti-semetic is FUNNY AF! I would rather be called a faggot TBH! I got on ya girl cuz she had no right coming at me for what I was saying on MY instagram! What u need to do is ask her why it all started in the 1st place but I'm sure your brain won't let u. And I'm perfectly fine with my barely 300 views. I make my vids for myself to state how I feel, don't u do the same thing?! Ain't that's what YouTube's for? I don't need 1000s of views. I've already had 1000s of views on other revenues and got PLENTY more coming I'm sure! &yes I have complained about not getting booked and u know damn well it's not cuz of my mouth or complain 247,,, it's cuz IM BLACK and the black merm struggle is something you white merms will NEVER understand! Point blank period! At the end of the day, miss Canadian mermaid, u keep forgetting y'all put me in neverland because of my mouth remember! Remember how y'all hyped me up so bad to talk shit FOR YALL cuz ya didn't have the balls to do it yourself??!! & your still a liar and a narcissist! Like I said, I got time and plenty of PETTY to go around! I'm still waiting on u to show this 3 part angry video I made too  liar liar tail on fire!!!

Omg ladies, do you hear that?? :lol:

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7GE4qXYGT6Y/UML4lbyuw8I/AAAAAAAAE5g/uT7VNjJk6VA/s640/038-She%27s+Beautiful.gif

[SeaGlass Siren]

Y’all can read however you want but my statement still stands: it’s not much of a read if the person attempting to read doesn’t know what they’re talking about. But, we can agree to disagree.

[AniaR]

Stop, delete, dont do it again?
and has he done or said anything like that since?
no, he hasn't. he was doing a live stream video and said some shit that was kinda not right to say...ok?
he never once denied it or tried to make excuses about it. only thing he didn't to is apologize.
which is is right to do.
just like it your right to still be upset by it.

literally just made excuses in his post on here. lol and in videos that came after... and in comments. Again, bending over backwards to negate his responsibility???

I honestly don't care that much about it anymore, it's more the topic of conversation at the moment because people started this rumor (which i think was accidental on their part) of death threats. And it's a pretty telling example of a long list of many of how Eric can come for others, but apparently no one can come for him back, or be allowed to stand up for themselves.

I do however appreciate your continued efforts to have a respectfully toned conversation with me over it, even if we disagree! You are always cool like that. For now, I'm off to bed!

[Prince Calypso]

it's hypocritical to speak out on racism but make an exception for a very inappropriately timed holocaust reference. Not sure why no one is willing to be accountable for that one?

that's just it. NO ONE IS MAKING EXCEPTIONS FOR ERIC!!!
Eric is a grown ass man who said something in the heat of the moment.
he fucked up...ok? we all do.
like you mistaking me for another mermaid simple because we both had braids.
when you apologized to me and i said its cool and whatever and didn't go all over mernetwork or Facebook, or Instagram bad mouthing you when i had every right to
that's what I'm saying
from day one Eric has done nothing but call out the bullshit in the mermaid community and at one point you were all on board with that till he termed that eye on you with his opinions and views of you and then suddenly it all wrong and he a bad person.
that's the point, that's the issue.

[RomanLaveau]

Please, give us the play by play on twitter lol

Oh girl you don't wanna play this game, because I was talking to Eric on Twitter but I was talking to all the other Girls in Stellas Cult on fb. And because I wasn't demonizing him yall jumped on the "he's against us" bandwagon and deleted me...OK. I already told Eric my thoughts on the Mermania drama, which were negative and thats the difference, I can express my opinion to him and he's still going to do what he wants and still be my friend. YALL are childish and delete ppl for not fighting your battles.

[Prince Calypso]

OK. I already told Eric my thoughts on the Mermania drama, which were negative and thats the difference, I can express my opinion to him and he's still going to do what he wants and still be my friend. YALL are childish and delete ppl for not fighting your battles.
All of this^

[AniaR]

like you mistaking me for another mermaid simple because we both had braids.
when you apologized to me and i said its cool and whatever and didn't go all over mernetwork or Facebook, or Instagram bad mouthing you when i had every right to
that's what I'm saying
from day one Eric has done nothing but call out the bullshit in the mermaid community and at one point you were all on board with that till he termed that eye on you with his opinions and views of you and then suddenly it all wrong and he a bad person.

Actually, I got confused because of a reference you made (not just cuz you looked like the person) that made me think you were them, and then when I mentioned about alt accounts and you said yeah you had them I got confused further. The difference between you and Eric is you and I could talk that out. You had a right to be offended but instead I PMed you to be like whoa shit I messed up and we talked about it, and I appreciate that. If Eric worked that way WITH ANYTHING i'd have no issue. Not once did he talk to me about this made up story that I prevented Naja from donating/sponsoring. he just went to making a video, when I thought we had zero issues and were friends. So yeah I am kinda over being fair with Eric. what's the point of that at this point? his friends just get exploited when he needs something to talk about.

As for bs in the mer community, I don't and never have needed Eric to speak on it. I keep getting credited for things other mermaids did lol. I have NEVER had an issue with speaking up about BS in the community. I thought that was REALLY obvious. I have 14,000 posts on here lol. I mean really... you gotta think about that one. Did I enjoy Eric's early rants that were about people judging fabric tails? Sure. But I've never once had an issue speaking up about BS myself. eric is not some spokesperson for me. if others rely on him for that, sure. But dont credit that to me lol.


Oh girl you don't wanna play this game, because I was talking to Eric on Twitter but I was talking to all the other Girls in Stellas Cult on fb. And because I wasn't demonizing him yall jumped on the "he's against us" bandwagon and deleted me...OK. I Actually, I didnt delete you even though your ex/sometimes bestie bit my head off for not doing so. I didn't delete you til I caught you publicly saying shit about me and realized, hey that dude isn't my friend if he can't just say that to me rather than all over the internet. Again, never had an issue fighting my own battles. lol I don't need a merman to do that for me*shrug* I just think it's interesting you always come in with these comments like you're some observer who stays out of it when you're right in there (ps I wasn't IN stella's cult when that went down. LOL)

[Starfrit]

Oh girl you don't wanna play this game, because I was talking to Eric on Twitter but I was talking to all the other Girls in Stellas Cult on fb. And because I wasn't demonizing him yall jumped on the "he's against us" bandwagon and deleted me...OK. I already told Eric my thoughts on the Mermania drama, which were negative and thats the difference, I can express my opinion to him and he's still going to do what he wants and still be my friend. YALL are childish and delete ppl for not fighting your battles.

Actually you were kicked out for being a two-faced snake who was actively encouraging Eric to instigate shit so you could practically get off on everyone's reactions in Stella's group LOL.

But sure, nah, you got the boot for being noble or whatever. We can go with that if that makes you feel better about the shit you were pulling on literally every side.

[AniaR]

I reallllly have to go to bed LOL The last thing I will say is, Eric has taken digs at me in older videos that were 100% on point, and I didn't care. I laughed, and even thought hmm I should work on that. I am that kind of person who self reflects and always will be regardless of the narrative people who dislike me put out. So no, it's not a matter of him making up opinion videos of me and not being able to handle it. It's the matter of, hey dude I thought we were friends, I have always supported you, even put myself at risk to defend you, and now you've made a bunch of videos straight up lying about me knowingly. Dress it up however you want, hide it behind comedy. It's just downright sick. I can handle it tho. Did it hurt my feelings? Yes. But at this point I got so much going for me, shit lessons like this are important. Because it's only gonna get crazier for me the more success comes my way. I will have to weed out the real friends from the fake ones and that will hurt. But I have also ALWAYS been someone who sticks up for the victims. And like I said, not everyone he goes after can handle that type of targeted harassment. With the good things that are about to happen for me, I expect my involvement in the community will be gone over with a microscope, and I have to be good with my actions. I am good with standing up against liars, and I am good if the world ends up seeing that and making up their own mind on what kind of person I am. <3

[jukumerboii]

Well good damn night! Go to sleep girl!

[Mermaid Mystery]

y'all, really??? i mean i have friends on both sides of this argument and this is getting ridiculous. yknow i never ever thought i'd be defending eric since i'm not exactly a big fan but jeez, this argument is petty on both sides. like there was no reason to respond to his initial comment, he didn't specify literally anything so you don't even know what he's referring to. i'm sure this sounds kinda hypocritical coming from me but if someone you don't like does literally anything that annoys you, why poke at a sleeping bear?? like did no one expect this reaction??? i've seen this argument boiling over for months now, and watching it blow up, honestly what's the point?? i hate being that kumbaya person but if someone's going to talk shit they're going to talk shit, nothing will change.
do i agree with what eric said?? absolutely not.
do i think he knew it was holocaust *rememberance day*?? no. also calling it the holocaust anniversary is weird cuz the holocaust didn't just happen in one day lmao
anyway can't wait till someone tries to drag me over this xoxo


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[Prince Calypso]

y'all, really??? i mean i have friends on both sides of this argument and this is getting ridiculous. yknow i never ever thought i'd be defending eric since i'm not exactly a big fan but jeez, this argument is petty on both sides. like there was no reason to respond to his initial comment, he didn't specify literally anything so you don't even know what he's referring to. i'm sure this sounds kinda hypocritical coming from me but if someone you don't like does literally anything that annoys you, why poke at a sleeping bear?? like did no one expect this reaction??? i've seen this argument boiling over for months now, and watching it blow up, honestly what's the point?? i hate being that kumbaya person but if someone's going to talk shit they're going to talk shit, nothing will change.
do i agree with what eric said?? absolutely not.
do i think he knew it was holocaust *rememberance day*?? no. also calling it the holocaust anniversary is weird cuz the holocaust didn't just happen in one day lmao
anyway can't wait till someone tries to drag me over this xoxo


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

This! most, if not all, of this! ^

[AniaR]

y'all, really??? i mean i have friends on both sides of this argument and this is getting ridiculous. yknow i never ever thought i'd be defending eric since i'm not exactly a big fan but jeez, this argument is petty on both sides. like there was no reason to respond to his initial comment, he didn't specify literally anything so you don't even know what he's referring to. i'm sure this sounds kinda hypocritical coming from me but if someone you don't like does literally anything that annoys you, why poke at a sleeping bear?? like did no one expect this reaction??? i've seen this argument boiling over for months now, and watching it blow up, honestly what's the point?? i hate being that kumbaya person but if someone's going to talk shit they're going to talk shit, nothing will change.
do i agree with what eric said?? absolutely not.
do i think he knew it was holocaust *rememberance day*?? no. also calling it the holocaust anniversary is weird cuz the holocaust didn't just happen in one day lmao
anyway can't wait till someone tries to drag me over this xoxo


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

last post I swear. Just to say, no I wouldn't drag you. lol your comments are reasonable. I know how my reply to "wooow" looked. It's the drama thread, and offsite drama often pairs up with here. Sometimes it better here than FB cuz people can't selectively delete their history or block others from replying and speaking their side. ;)

[Mermaid Ankhali]

Daaamnnnn. *eats popcorn*


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[RomanLaveau]

Actually, I didnt delete you even though your ex/sometimes bestie bit my head off for not doing so. I didn't delete you til I caught you publicly saying shit about me and realized, hey that dude isn't my friend if he can't just say that to me rather than all over the internet. Again, never had an issue fighting my own battles. lol I don't need a merman to do that for me*shrug* I just think it's interesting you always come in with these comments like you're some observer who stays out of it when you're right in there (ps I wasn't IN stella's cult when that went down. LOL)

My Ex bestie? Venessa? I really dont understand her deal tbh. Girl anyways, you really gonna act like you don't talk about your friends privately and not personally to them everytime, chile, I know what I said it wasn't that bad because I have opinions on EVERYONE. You def said something about me privately at some point before I publicly said something about you, why didn't you PM me? And I said I came for the reads, Andrea commented and I said what I said. Then Calypso said something that resonated with me and I said something that wasn't even really relevant to YOUR stuff. then WHO commented some smart ass remark? Girl, you know me well enough to know I was gonna say something back, lets not. Always act like I'm an observer? How many times has drama popped off between you and Eric where I have actively been involved? Two times including this one, again, lets not. So it's really not that interesting, but you tried.


Actually you were kicked out for being a two-faced snake who was actively encouraging Eric to instigate shit so you could practically get off on everyone's reactions in Stella's group LOL.

But sure, nah, you got the boot for being noble or whatever. We can go with that if that makes you feel better about the shit you were pulling on literally every side.

First of all hoe, NO i wasn't being a two faced snake. You guys were literally in a group thats sole purpose was to talk shit about people unnecessarily, and then yall wanted to get mad at Eric for talking shit to Arion because he got sad that the truth hurt. And i told yall he shouldn't get into stuff if he didn't want his feelings hurt, and yall wanted to cry oh no thats victim blaming blah. Thats BS, yall were acting holier than thou. I wasn't about to sit and argue with him to stop, I said you gonna do what you gonna do in so many words. He never saw screenshots or shit about what yall said so where was I being two faced? I was friends with Veronica and Venessa and other ppl AND I'm friends with Eric, I told BOTH of yall it was stupid as hell. Acting noble, girl get that out of here, I called yall stupid to him and I said he was dumb to yall. Stay in your irrelevant ass lane. I typed all this to not know who the hell you are. But your goofy lookin self def caught the right one today

[Mermaid Kane]

Daaamnnnn. *eats popcorn*


Same. I had to get seconds LMAO..

[Mermaid Yuki]

special ed class took in school. u not joke of week on comedy show but star for part. most stink like poo poo as you must been prop.


Yuki u sound crazy!
Andrea u still a fan I see, since u correcting me, correct Yuki too while u at it! That's why I'm still Yemayas son AF!
Raina u just  silly. U really think I KNEW about that holocaust anniversary?!? See how u like adding in stuff that don't belong!?! Ur such a narcissist its amazing!
Pearlie I'm so over u riding my waves, I need to mail u a pic with my signature so u can hang it on your wall!
&last time I checked, the joke of the week merman was a white guy, not me, so that wasn't even a qualified joke to use capital LOL and claim that you died of laughter!  It was weak! I got time to be PETTY y'all!!! I can really take over this if I wanted too!

[SeaGlass Siren]

Yuki the name calling is a bit much.

[AniaR]

Dead [emoji23] who is Yuki and where did they come from

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[AniaR]

My Ex bestie? Venessa? I really dont understand her deal tbh. Girl anyways, you really gonna act like you don't talk about your friends privately and not personally to them everytime, chile, I know what I said it wasn't that bad because I have opinions on EVERYONE. You def said something about me privately at some point before I publicly said something about you, why didn't you PM me? And I said I came for the reads, Andrea commented and I said what I said. Then Calypso said something that resonated with me and I said something that wasn't even really relevant to YOUR stuff. then WHO commented some smart ass remark? Girl, you know me well enough to know I was gonna say something back, lets not. Always act like I'm an observer? How many times has drama popped off between you and Eric where I have actively been involved? Two times including this one, again, lets not. So it's really not that interesting, but you tried.

First off, I actually hadn't said anything about you in private. [emoji23] I never really had a reason to. But if you wanted to talk about your thoughts of me in private I don't care. People can have private conversation it doesn't affect my life lol. Your ex friend or current friend I can't keep up, Vero. Months of telling us to delete you and flipping out that we didn't because we didn't agree with her. I think that entire conversation on my end consisted of " I don't really know him that well and he was nice to me when I was stressed at Mermania" and guess how much THAT got thrown in my face lol. Dude, I even got clips of you in my documentary, and gave a public speech thanking you infront of the whole con for your help. I don't expect you to ride or die me, but maybe not shit talk me publicly would be nice.

You came for the reads, and I pointed out your commentary lol. I'm not wrong. Twitter posts all public. But we call that out and we are the ones starting shit? I can't keep up.

I don't know why people who do nothing but this sort of crap, think they have any place calling someone irrelevant. (Or a hoe for that matter) Know exactly where that came from, and perfect example of the behavior. Talk to me more about this trying, cuz I'm 1000% done with these sexist double standards these mermen seem to be putting out.

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[Keiris]

Good grief this turned into a shitstorm of pettiness. Was so excited to see names I haven't seen on here for months and months...Sea Glass, Starfrit, Roman, Blix etc. and of all the threads on this Forum it has to be THIS one! Ugh. So bummed. Does ANYONE ever just settle a conflict one on one, PRIVATELY, with out dragging all their FB friends, Their Instagram friends, their Twitter friends, their snapchat friends, their alternate page friends, deleting and unfriending and blocking and all that stupid immature crap???!!! ANYONE!!!??? I think I am getting too old for all this. :lol:

[SeaGlass Siren]

Keiris, with all due respect, no one dragged anybody on here. Everyone came out of their own free will. If you didn’t want to be in here why are you in here?

[Keiris]

I came because I was happy to see YOUR name, and Starfrit, and Roman and the others, like I said. You have all been gone for SO LONG. The last time I saw a post from you I think you were remodeling your apartment and that's been over a year!

[SeaGlass Siren]

Yeah I haven’t been on very often to post anything important. I just stay to Instagram now.

[Keiris]

I'm so out of the loop I don't do any of that. Just no time. I miss seeing you, and Lorelei, and Starfrit and Hawaiian Merman, Roman, Arion, the list goes on! Raina and Pearlie are the only ones that post regularly anymore. Aaaahh well. Glad you are still swimming around. It was good to see your moniker.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Same with you - good speaking to you!

[jukumerboii]

I just really wanna know how I'm sexist?!? Sexist and I don't even go together in the same sentence!?! I'm THE gay merman for crying out loud! I have only 3 best friends who are all female and got PLENTY of trans sisters to call on. But this is what the Canada Dry Narcissist does on a daily, twist folks words around, add in stuff that don't make sense and act like she's a saint! She's been doing it for YEARS! I JUST FINALLY SAW THE LIGHT! And she talking about my fabric tail rants,but she and some other merms in private group chats LOVED when I spoke ill on 3 other merms! She was all in for it! And yes PETTY is my middle name! Y'all in the DRAMA Thread and getting shocked at drama going on 😂! I personally think this thread shouldn't event exist TBH! However I'm an entertainer and I'm entertaining whoever reads this mess 😂 y'all make sure to like, comment, and subscribe to my 300 views YouTube videos and follow my igs @the.blixunami and my private one if u nasty @thetrue_merman!

[gay-mermaid]

I just really wanna know how I'm sexist?!? Sexist and I don't even go together in the same sentence!?! I'm THE gay merman for crying out loud! I have only 3 best friends who are all female and got PLENTY of trans sisters to call on. But this is what the Canada Dry Narcissist does on a daily, twist folks words around, add in stuff that don't make sense and act like she's a saint! She's been doing it for YEARS! I JUST FINALLY SAW THE LIGHT! And she talking about my fabric tail rants,but she and some other merms in private group chats LOVED when I spoke ill on 3 other merms! She was all in for it! And yes PETTY is my middle name! Y'all in the DRAMA Thread and getting shocked at drama going on 😂! I personally think this thread shouldn't event exist TBH! However I'm an entertainer and I'm entertaining whoever reads this mess 😂 y'all make sure to like, comment, and subscribe to my 300 views YouTube videos and follow my igs @the.blixunami and my private one if u nasty @thetrue_merman!
i will say from experience that being a gay man does not excuse you from sexism. neither does having friends who are women. being THE gay merman (for crying out loud!) does not make someone any less sexist

[Mermaid Kane]

i will say from experience that being a gay man does not excuse you from sexism. neither does having friends who are women. being THE gay merman (for crying out loud!) does not make someone any less sexist

I speak from experience (as someone who is active in the LGBT+ community) that gay men can be highly sexist. I've gotten comments like "I'm gay 'cuz I love dick, lesbians are gay cuz girls are weak pussies who can't take the dick, and lesbians are even weaker." And "you fckin gonna get raped, bitch. no man muscle by your side to protect you."
So yes. Sexism is out there, from gay men. Yes, a fellow LGBT+ member will tell you off XXX because this lesbian ISNT weak.
And no, you will NEVER understand what it feels like. So dont act like you are the enemy of sexism and the saint of all girls because you are gay. Don't rock that fucking boat.

Whoa, that was pretty petty and salty.... oh well I'm to tired of bad excused to care.

[gay-mermaid]

I speak from experience (as someone who is active in the LGBT+ community) that gay men can be highly sexist. I've gotten comments like "I'm gay 'cuz I love dick, lesbians are gay cuz girls are weak pussies, and lesbians are even weaker." And "you fckin gonna get raped, bitch. no man muscle by your side to protect you."
So yes. Sexism is out there, from gay men. Yes, a fellow LGBT+ member will tell you off XXX because this lesbian ISNT weak.
And no, you will NEVER understand what it feels like. So dont act like you are the enemy of sexism and the saint of all girls because you are gay. Don't rock that fucking boat.

Whoa, that was pretty petty and salty.... oh well I'm to tired of bad excused to care.
exactly. ive had comments from gay men like this as well. too many think they are excused from sexist behavior because they're gay. and this guys language towards women throughout this little arguement is not helping his case.

[PearlieMae]

exactly. ive had comments from gay men like this as well. too many think they are excused from sexist behavior because they're gay. and this guys language towards women throughout this little arguement is not helping his case.


I speak from experience (as someone who is active in the LGBT+ community) that gay men can be highly sexist. I've gotten comments like "I'm gay 'cuz I love dick, lesbians are gay cuz girls are weak pussies who can't take the dick, and lesbians are even weaker." And "you fckin gonna get raped, bitch. no man muscle by your side to protect you."
So yes. Sexism is out there, from gay men. Yes, a fellow LGBT+ member will tell you off XXX because this lesbian ISNT weak.
And no, you will NEVER understand what it feels like. So dont act like you are the enemy of sexism and the saint of all girls because you are gay. Don't rock that fucking boat.

Whoa, that was pretty petty and salty.... oh well I'm to tired of bad excused to care.

BRAVA :clap:

"hoes", "little girls", "pussies", etc. No, that's not sexist at all.
(And harkening back to a comment on me "riding (your) waves", puhleeze...your "waves" have the depth of a mud puddle.)

http://replygif.net/i/1081.gif

[Mermaid Kane]

BRAVA :clap:

"hoes", "little girls", "pussies", etc. No, that's not sexist at all.
(And harkening back to a comment on me "riding (your) waves", puhleeze...your "waves" have the depth of a mud puddle.)

http://replygif.net/i/1081.gif

It's funny.... There doesn't seem to be many of those kinds of words for men. Coincidence? I think not.

[PearlieMae]

It's funny.... There doesn't seem to be many of those kinds of words for men. Coincidence? I think not.

My daughter is a drag queen (bio queen/lady queen) and you wouldn't believe the crap she gets.

[Arking]

BRAVA :clap:

"hoes", "little girls", "pussies", etc. No, that's not sexist at all.
(And harkening back to a comment on me "riding (your) waves", puhleeze...your "waves" have the depth of a mud puddle.)

http://replygif.net/i/1081.gif

43090

I'm sorry! I couldn't help myself my mind immediately thought of this!!!
:shark: <3 <3

[Arking]

In all seriousness this is thankfully a topic that's being addressed more and more in my circles here in the Pacific Northwest. People aren't putting up with those ideologies that seem to permeate gay culture and are calling them out online as well as in community safe spaces.

[Mermaid Kane]

In all seriousness this is thankfully a topic that's being addressed more and more in my circles here in the Pacific Northwest. People aren't putting up with those ideologies that seem to permeate gay culture and are calling them out online as well as in community safe spaces.

Yeah, I'm glad it's getting talked about more openly. Being gay shouldn't be an accuse to be a bigot of any sort. :)

[Arking]

It's funny.... There doesn't seem to be many of those kinds of words for men. Coincidence? I think not.

Oddly enough some of those same words are used against men to put down men. One of the big topics in the community around here and especially in dating platforms is stigma against "fem" men. Key word there "fem" and the preference to label themselves as "masc". In this day and age where we are looking at gender fluidity seriously and redefining ourselves there's no room for that kind of prejudice and misogyny.

[Mermaid Kane]

Oddly enough some of those same words are used against men to put down men. One of the big topics in the community around here and especially in dating platforms is stigma against "fem" men. Key word there "fem" and the preference to label themselves as "masc". In this day and age where we are looking at gender fluidity seriously and redefining ourselves there's no room for that kind of prejudice and misogyny.
I agree, 100%.

[shimmygoddess]

This is really disheartening. I understand everyone is upset and there is already history, which makes it hard to move on. Like most problems within the community, I feel it stems from people not admitting they were wrong or went too far. I do not comment of Erics stuff b/c I am not following him or FB friends. Do I want to, yes of course. The one issue I had with someone in the community stemmed from them being unethical and lying about me, did they ever admit they were wrong or apologize? No. and they won't ever admit it. So I have moved on. If someone took the time to say " hey I went too far, I fucked up" then I think things would get better. Some are willing to do that and others aren't. Unfortunately I don't see a way for any of this to get better. I do think some of the hateful comments above went too far. I understand the drama thread is here for a reason, but people can be nice and respectful even if they disagree :(

[shimmygoddess]

But this is what the Canada Dry Narcissist does on a daily, twist folks words around,

I think it is comments like that. You can make a post and not include that. Some stuff is unnecessary. I know you will say " I can say what I want" and sure you can, but that is why people are saying stuff about you and questioning it. What I try to do is stick with facts and keep my personal feelings out of it. ( This is how I have handled my own 'dramas', and noone could come at me, b/c I spoke facts.

[Mermaid Oona]

Uhh. Was this post is supposed to vent about drama or cause more of it? Why can't just everyone ignore this "Eric" guy because i know nothing about him and i shouldn't say much about it, because I don't know the full story nor do I want to know. All I have to say is, if you want this fire to die ( metaphorically ) then quit feeding the fire.The human race is the same and we all need each other. Ethnicity should not be the reason from any negative conflicts, nor gender Identity, sexual orientation or religion. And we should embrace those differences because uniqueness is a great thing. By making your ones self separate from others who disagree and causing a spark of conflict because of clashing ideas is not good unless it's neeed.We are all the same from the inside. Just be happy we found a place that promotes our hobby or lifestyle and no discrimination of being a mermaid or merman.

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile app

[Mermaid Kane]

People should not put themselves in a category because of their melanin in their skin. There is one race and it's called the human race. We are all the same from the inside. Just be happy we found a place that promotes our hobby or lifestyle and no discrimination of being a mermaid or merman.

Its unfortunate how much affect the basic biology we are born with can have with our social lives. Sad.

[Mermaid Oona]

Its unfortunate how much affect the basic biology we are born with can have with our social lives. Sad.Indeed

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[Arking]

Well I'm off to work in a bit so I'll be out of the loop and I know I shouldn't but I'm going to anyway.

I don't agree with you Mermaid Oona, and while I wish your statement rang true for a lot of people, it's unfortunately far from the reality. They are right to, as you put it, "put themselves in a category because of their melanin in their skin" because the social stigmas and their lived experiences have been and will be different from anyone else. Wanting everyone to get along is one thing but it's not fair to them to try and minimize the very thing that makes them different from the majority of everyone else. I think a better perspective for you to consider is that people of colour have lived lives being told by western culture that it's a weakness and instead of believing in that lie they own that difference it and turn it into something to celebrate and they have earned that right.

I'm sorry if I've taken your words incorrectly but if so I would only say that carefully considering their construction would help.

[Mermaid Oona]

Well I'm off to work in a bit so I'll be out of the loop and I know I shouldn't but I'm going to anyway.

I don't agree with you Mermaid Oona, and while I wish your statement rang true for a lot of people, it's unfortunately far from the reality. They are right to, as you put it, "put themselves in a category because of their melanin in their skin" because the social stigmas and their lived experiences have been and will be different from anyone else. Wanting everyone to get along is one thing but it's not fair to them to try and minimize the very thing that makes them different from the majority of everyone else. I think a better perspective for you to consider is that people of colour have lived lives being told by western culture that it's a weakness and instead of believing in that lie they own that difference it and turn it into something to celebrate and they have earned that right.

I'm sorry if I've taken your words incorrectly but if so I would only say that carefully considering their construction would help. Sorry about that, what I meant to say was this before I pressed send.

The human race is the same and we all need each other. Ethnicity should not be the reason from any negative conflicts, nor gender Identity, sexual orientation or religion. And we should embrace those differences because uniqueness is a great thing. By making your ones self separate from others who disagree and causing a spark of conflict because of clashing ideas is not good unless it's needed.


( I'm going to edit it now)

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[RomanLaveau]

First off, I actually hadn't said anything about you in private. [emoji23] I never really had a reason to. But if you wanted to talk about your thoughts of me in private I don't care. People can have private conversation it doesn't affect my life lol. Your ex friend or current friend I can't keep up, Vero. Months of telling us to delete you and flipping out that we didn't because we didn't agree with her. I think that entire conversation on my end consisted of " I don't really know him that well and he was nice to me when I was stressed at Mermania" and guess how much THAT got thrown in my face lol. Dude, I even got clips of you in my documentary, and gave a public speech thanking you infront of the whole con for your help. I don't expect you to ride or die me, but maybe not shit talk me publicly would be nice.

You came for the reads, and I pointed out your commentary lol. I'm not wrong. Twitter posts all public. But we call that out and we are the ones starting shit? I can't keep up.

I don't know why people who do nothing but this sort of crap, think they have any place calling someone irrelevant. (Or a hoe for that matter) Know exactly where that came from, and perfect example of the behavior. Talk to me more about this trying, cuz I'm 1000% done with these sexist double standards these mermen seem to be putting out.

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile app (http://MerNetwork mobile app)

IF you didn't then V def lied on you hahaha but that's yalls problem. Girl and thats between you and Veronica. As far as all the things you did for me, thanks? And for the shit talking, I don't even remember publicly talking about you so whatever on that.

Yea I came for the reads, I talked to CALYPSO, and you responded some smart ass remarks and I clapped back. What are you on about with the end of that Twitter thing "But we call that out and we are the ones starting shit" that whole ordeal started on fb before twitter so again, what are you talking about?

All you do is run your mouth too so whats tea, whenever theres drama, theres you. Whenever someone posts anything, theres you making it about a time YOU did something. Someone has problem, theres YOU talking about a your problems. So all you do is this sorta crap. I have every place to call someone irrelevant AND a hoe, I'll call anyone a hoe. Where is the sexist double standards, what did we say you can't do that we can. You love to call everyone something and because in this community you have the WORST victim mentality. Always saying "idk where this came from I've only been (insert doin the bare ass minimum for them). And clearly you aren't done because Eric said wow and here came your dumbass commenting something smart then when your lame chronic feelings get hurt you're gonna cry out SEXISM. Maybe if you sat there and ate your food and shut up, you wouldn't be in this predicament, but theres that victim thing again.

[RomanLaveau]

My daughter is a drag queen (bio queen/lady queen) and you wouldn't believe the crap she gets.

I have never seen a or heard of a Lady Queen, I've only seen Drag Kings. whats her Drag name and where does she perform?

[RomanLaveau]

However I'm an entertainer and I'm entertaining whoever reads this mess  y'all make sure to like, comment, and subscribe to my 300 views YouTube videos and follow my igs @the.blixunami and my private one if u nasty @thetrue_merman!
"if you nasty" bitch I'm screaming omg hahahaha

[PearlieMae]

I have never seen a or heard of a Lady Queen, I've only seen Drag Kings. whats her Drag name and where does she perform?

She's Cream Victoria/Regina Stargazer and she performs regularly at The Stonewall Inn, RockBar NYC, Bizarre Bushwick, Sideshows By The Seashore, and about 50 other places. She performs Boylesque as Jayson Mustachio, too.

43093

https://nypost.com/video/fierce-female-drag-queen-stands-out-in-a-male-dominated-field/

[MermaidAine]

She's Cream Victoria/Regina Stargazer and she performs regularly at The Stonewall Inn, RockBar NYC, Bizarre Bushwick, Sideshows By The Seashore, and about 50 other places. She performs Boylesque as Jayson Mustachio, too.

43093

https://nypost.com/video/fierce-female-drag-queen-stands-out-in-a-male-dominated-field/

I love Lady Queens! I am a burlesque performer, so I kind of fall into that category I suppose. Drag is definitely not just about boys dressing as girls or visa versa, it's about putting on a different persona. It's about over the top looks and performances.

[jukumerboii]

Lemme make this my last thing and make it short!

1. the FACT that I have other BLACK folks telling me, white folks have TOLD them they couldn't be merms cuz they WAS BLACK &that black merms don't exist is what Lil ol Pearlie felt the need to say was made up and it came from me being a SEAWEED smoker! What does me being a seaweed smoker have to do with me posting about that?!?!

2.then I took screenshots,posted it, my SUPPORTERS called her out, Nessie came out the cut with her urchins and she got posted too!

3. I came on mernetwork to look for something tail related and the drama thread hit me cuz I remembered the Canada Dry Narcissist talked about me some tides before, along with other anchovies! I read it, along with the other stuff and decided to say "Woooow" then BOOM, here comes Canada Dry Narcissist with her SLICK TALK!

4. SHE DIDNT HAVE TO SAY THAT!

5. Now we are here!

6.i call myself THE Gay Mermaid cuz Davey Wavey GAVE IT TO ME!

7. Thank you Arking!!!

8. I SAID WHAT I SAID!

[Merman Arion]

6.i call myself THE Gay Mermaid cuz Davey Wavey GAVE IT TO ME!

http://mrwgifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Well-Theres-a-Shock-For-a-Sarcastic-Selena-Gomez.gif

A narcissist idiot proudly bragging about his click-bait youtube title given from a narcissist hypocritical gym queen (=Davey Wavey) :rolleyes:

Fitting.

[gay-mermaid]

IF you didn't then V def lied on you hahaha but that's yalls problem. Girl and thats between you and Veronica. As far as all the things you did for me, thanks? And for the shit talking, I don't even remember publicly talking about you so whatever on that.

Yea I came for the reads, I talked to CALYPSO, and you responded some smart ass remarks and I clapped back. What are you on about with the end of that Twitter thing "But we call that out and we are the ones starting shit" that whole ordeal started on fb before twitter so again, what are you talking about?

All you do is run your mouth too so whats tea, whenever theres drama, theres you. Whenever someone posts anything, theres you making it about a time YOU did something. Someone has problem, theres YOU talking about a your problems. So all you do is this sorta crap. I have every place to call someone irrelevant AND a hoe, I'll call anyone a hoe. Where is the sexist double standards, what did we say you can't do that we can. You love to call everyone something and because in this community you have the WORST victim mentality. Always saying "idk where this came from I've only been (insert doin the bare ass minimum for them). And clearly you aren't done because Eric said wow and here came your dumbass commenting something smart then when your lame chronic feelings get hurt you're gonna cry out SEXISM. Maybe if you sat there and ate your food and shut up, you wouldn't be in this predicament, but theres that victim thing again.
kay so like, you, as a man, should not be calling women hoes in an arguement. like thats that. you can call friends hoes or whatever joking i dont care but doing it as a sort of "one-up" on them is sexist. thats like....common sense dude

[Mermaid Kane]

kay so like, you, as a man, should not be calling women hoes in an arguement. like thats that. you can call friends hoes or whatever joking i dont care but doing it as a sort of "one-up" on them is sexist. thats like....common sense dude

Yeah. Hoe, pussy, little girl... All words I don't want to hear coming out of a man's mouth when he's talking to women.

Roman. I suppose, in your line of logic, you wouldn't call it racism if I called you a racial slurs?

[gay-mermaid]

Yeah. Hoe, pussy, little girl... All words I don't want to hear coming out of a man's mouth when he's talking to women.

Roman. I suppose, in your line of logic, you wouldn't call it racism if I called you n*****? (Ugh, I hate just TYPING that word. :/)
woah, i wouldnt go that far, come on man

[Mermaid Whisper]

Yeah, don't. Way too far.

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[Mermaid Kane]

woah, i wouldnt go that far, come on man

What? I didn't CALL him that. I wouldn't!!
I simply asked him a legitimate question. If he gets a bit of a shock, that's the point. It's a double standard to think sexist slurs are great, and racist slurs aren't.... It's biggotry the same. I get just as angry when I see racist slurs or sexist slurs.

I apologise for going too far, though. I edited my post.

[Arking]

(Ugh, I hate just TYPING that word. :/)

That was a line that didn't need to be crossed.

As a side note I once had a penchant for calling people hoe's/whore etc in a jest and similar mannerism to how people used the term "gay" derogatory but never with malice. It ended when I was out in Toronto for a party with some close friends and was invited to meet a mutual friend of theirs. I made a comment without thinking and received a quick education on the harm I'd done as their friends occupation happened to be in prostitution. Thing was she was sweet, endearing and utterly polite and I had hurt her and made her uncomfortable along with our present company with my ignorance. I felt pretty bad and spent the next few days feeling unwelcome in my own mind and around my friends as I'd created this suffocating environment. I still think about it a lot and it's become a defining point in my life.

[Mermaid Whisper]

This thread has absolutely gotten out of hand in the past few weeks, far more than usual.

Instead of discussing mer issues, it has now devolved into name-calling, personal attacks, court cases, and apparently racial slurs.

I'd like to think the community is better than this.

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile app

[Mermaid Kane]

Instead of discussing mer issues, it has now devolved into name-calling, personal attacks, court cases, and apparently racial slurs.

I'd like to think the community is better than this.

NOT my intention at ALL. I spoke too freely and I apologise deeply. My intention was to get a bit of a reaction, not be racist. I'm not. :c
I edited my original post and sincerely apologize for my question. It is not being interperated how I meant it too, and I wasn't trying to call anyone anything.

[Mermaid Kane]

I'm really sorry for any pots I stirred. I'm going to apologise for any damage I've done, and leave the thread. I'm not communicating in a good, understanding way.

So sorry. :c

[Arking]

I apologize too, to think I may have contributed to a dialogue that's gone so awry and sunken to these depths is stomach turning. Such discourse only validates the conflicts others have said to exist, that which is used to justify the feeling of isolation and otherness within this community.

[MermaidAiera]

This thread has absolutely gotten out of hand in the past few weeks, far more than usual.

Instead of discussing mer issues, it has now devolved into name-calling, personal attacks, court cases, and apparently racial slurs.

I'd like to think the community is better than this.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[MermaidAine]

I would love to see this much talk going on in the other threads.
I was so excited about the new app, thinking I could get back in touch with all of the mermaids/mermen that I used to talk to here before. Sadly in the past week that I have been coming back here I haven't seen much talking at all till I opened up this stupid thread.
So here's a challenge for us all. Let's go post something positive on another thread... Any other thread.

[shimmygoddess]

See there you go...some are willing to say" sorry I was wrong or went too far!!" That is awesome. Now if only others could do that too, then the community would be less at war :group hug::group hug:

[jukumerboii]

A. R. I. O. N!
LIL GIRL,
PLEASE LETS NOT START THIS WAR!!!!
Cuz I've been waiting...out of all the things I posted, your lame ass just HAD to come for me for number 6! I bet your ass was itching to type that foolishness!

You still mad that Davey and I CHOOSE to put mermaid in the title!!?? Why does using the word merMaid have to be considered click bait?? Why are u so jellyfish about it?!?! As soon as the video got posted your sorry ass was the ONLY ONE hating off the video cuz of something as small as it being called the Gay Mermaid !!!! What makes YOU The merm name police?!?

Y'all can sit here and sing kumbyya all ya want! This mermaid world is JUST like the 2legga world, I'm not going to get along with EVERYMERM! Hell the only 2 that ERK my nerves are Canada Dry Narcissist and this Lil Frenchie Hoe! I'm a black gay male who had to grow up in a society where I have to always go head to head with folks just cuz of my skin color among MANY MANY MANY other things! I don't expect for any of y'all to understand why I say what I say! U never will! Name calling is just the icing on the cake. Y'all think THIS is sexist, mean, and all them other stupid words if ya want too! That's not my issue! My mouth can get waaaaaaaay worst! This is me being nice!!! I know I said I was done but if ya reply to what I say, bitch IM COMING FOR YA ASS!!! I respect those that respect me simply cuz if I meet u for the 1st time, Imma automatically come to u with respect! I bet if half of y'all knew me in REAL LIFE you'd see why I'm going off on this forum!

[jukumerboii]

MERMAID KANE OUT HERE!!! I'm not even about to go IN on you like how I wanted to when I 1st read your comment to my Twiin bro! U hate typing the word but still did it subconsciously. However u apologized and that's fine! However imma need y'all to STOP acting like FEMALES CANT BE SEXIST TOWARDS MEN! My girls have called plenty men whores and bitches! Y'all gotta stop with this one sided b.s! So calling somebody a nigger and bitches/hoes ARE NOT THE SAME THING!

[Winged Mermaid]

Y'all need to stop, this is getting out of hand. Take some time to cool off, or I'll make you take the time. Also, FYI- Name calling is against the rules, regardless of the thought process behind it. Don't do it.

[AniaR]

I'm glad to see others are aware and calling out the double standards and sexism coming from men in our industry. I've been quiet for a long time on the topic, and it's def not just the ones involved in this thread. We are constantly reminded and expected to make sure men are included in this industry and not discriminated against. I forwarded a book interview to Eric and several other mer men, published articles and blogs etc. Despite my issues with these folks, I still believe things need to be more equal. And I'm getting damn tired of that being one sided. The sexism from men in the industry against women has been going on for years, and it's time to make a change. This is a female dominated industry and we shouldn't settle for this crap

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile app

[AniaR]

PS. Narcissist = a person unable to show empathy to others. Take a look at the people in this thread who literally can't show any empathy.

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile app

[gay-mermaid]

this guy legit calls women "females". are you? for real??? and dude...words like bitch and whore are gendered insults. it has different meaning when said towards women and afab people. it always has.

[Ransom]

I'm glad to see others are aware and calling out the double standards and sexism coming from men in our industry. I've been quiet for a long time on the topic, and it's def not just the ones involved in this thread. We are constantly reminded and expected to make sure men are included in this industry and not discriminated against. I forwarded a book interview to Eric and several other mer men, published articles and blogs etc. Despite my issues with these folks, I still believe things need to be more equal. And I'm getting damn tired of that being one sided. The sexism from men in the industry against women has been going on for years, and it's time to make a change. This is a female dominated industry and we shouldn't settle for this crap

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile appIt's a matter of respect, which goes far deeper than race or sex. If anyone is wondering what they can call someone and get away with it... don't. Words mean things.

If any kind of insult is in someone's to-reach toolbox when dealing with others (let alone fellow professionals) something is seriously wrong. We can disagree strongly and yet respect each other.

Mers are very strong role models, especially here--for better or worse.

[PearlieMae]

PS. Narcissist = a person unable to show empathy to others. Take a look at the people in this thread who literally can't show any empathy.

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile app

http://replygif.net/i/95.gif

[Calizaire]

Not sure where you guys got your psychology educations or what state credentials you, but "narcissist" doesn't = a persona unable to show empathy to others.

[Mermaid Kane]

Not sure where you guys got your psychology educations or what state credentials you, but "narcissist" doesn't = a persona unable to show empathy to others.

This is the definition... While apathy is a common trait, that is in no way the condition. That would better describe a psychopath or sociopath.

Narcissist - a person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves.
"narcissists who think the world revolves around them"

(Pfft, I thought I told myself to leave the thread.... okay bye again)

[Calizaire]

I have several advanced degrees in the area, am credentialed both state and federally, and have been practicing psychology for 7 years, but thanks. :)

[Ransom]

I have several advanced degrees in the area, am credentialed both state and federally, and have been practicing psychology for 7 years, but thanks. :)It's more correct to say narcissism has an inability to empathise as a consequence of having that inordinate focus on oneself. It's where that personality trait leads, not the trait itself.

Raina may not have meant to define the word, so the = sign is a little misleading there.

[AniaR]

From the diagnostic manual: https://behavenet.com/diagnostic-criteria-30181-narcissistic-personality-disorder

(7) lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others

Along with everything else listed there. My degree in child development and working with kids and teens who have special needs and personality disorders covered that one too. (not that people need to berated about not having a psychology degree to understand a comment?) if people in here want to accuse others of being the word, they may want to reflect on the criteria of it.

P.s. no one has said a single thing about women NOT being sexist to men.

I trust people can read and draw their own conclusions.



(1) has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
(2) is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
(3) believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
(4) requires excessive admiration
(5) has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
(6) is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
(7) lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
(8) is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
(9) shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes

I like that holding people accountable for sexist and harassing behavior boils down to deflecting over an = sign.

[AniaR]

also, it's not an insult. LOL Maybe stick to American jokes, cuz I'll wear "Canada Dry" proudly. lol 100% natural... ginger??? Refreshing?
43095

[Ransom]

From the diagnostic manual: https://behavenet.com/diagnostic-criteria-30181-narcissistic-personality-disorder

(7) lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others

Along with everything else listed there. My degree in child development and working with kids and teens who have special needs and personality disorders covered that one too. (not that people need to berated about not having a psychology degree to understand a comment?) if people in here want to accuse others of being the word, they may want to reflect on the criteria of it.

P.s. no one has said a single thing about women NOT being sexist to men.

I trust people can read and draw their own conclusions.



I like that holding people accountable for sexist and harassing behavior boils down to deflecting over an = sign.Of course, though clarity is important so we're all on the same page. That might mean adding source info in the original post so the more pedantic of us don't jump [emoji14]

The originator of that sexism is also serving out a ban, so the inciting incident is being dealt with as far as the admins are able. We could've slammed him all day and night, but that wouldn't have been holding him accountable.

Agree that it's a serious issue though, let's address it in its own thread.

[AniaR]

Oh thanks for pointing that out. The new ap doesn't show if someone is, like the old one did

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[inanna]

so.. i kind of accidentally caused this to explode with the death threat thing. sorry

[Keiris]

...and there go 3 more Mers

[Mermaid Whisper]

*tired sigh*

[Mermaid Ankhali]

I feel I should also apologize for stirring the pot. I didn't mean to cause such a fuss when I inquired about what happened at Mermania.


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[Mermaid Ankhali]

...and there go 3 more Mers

Three?


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[Mermaid Ankhali]

Also, as a fellow Black mermaid, melanin is not an excuse for utter rudeness and disrespect.


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[Arking]

Three?


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Three accounts have been banned from the site. Jukumerboii, Arion, and RomanLaveau. Though it isn't entirely clear as to why beyond them putting down another mer in their comments. The post above by Winged indicates she only intended to take that action if they persisted in their discourse " Take some time to cool off, or I'll make you take the time." but all of that happened prior to her warning. Also Mermaid Kane is not banned from the group despite referring to Roman using a very offensive racial slur which was later edited so perhaps some comments have been removed. It's all very confusing and likely only temporary so I wouldn't be too concerned.

[Mermaid Whisper]

43110

[SeaGlass Siren]

Also, as a fellow Black mermaid, melanin is not an excuse for utter rudeness and disrespect.
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Holy shit finally thank you

[AniaR]

*shrug* it's the DRAMA thread, it's not your fault how people respond to you, everyone is responsible for their own actions. I started it with my "wooow". Like I said, sometimes it's good to address things here because people can't block you and then still go on publicly about you, and can't selectively delete their own comments like they can on FB. If any members get annoyed by the thread, they should just avoid it. Because it's the specific only place on the site for hashing stuff out.

And yeah, now that I'm checking from the actual website, they're suspended not banned. It's usually a week. And it's usually for flat out name calling.

[Mermaid Kane]

Also Mermaid Kane is not banned from the group despite referring to Roman using a very offensive racial slur which was later edited so perhaps some comments have been removed. It's all very confusing and likely only temporary so I wouldn't be too concerned.

Now that I'm calmed down, I'm going to further explain that...
I didn't call him a racial slur. EVER, even before I edited the post. I asked the question in a way that was very misinterpreted and didn't get the correct point across. The question wasn't calling him a slur. I should have said it better, but I seriously lack social skills and make mistakes. I should have worded it as ''would you say it wasn't racism if someone called you a racial slur?'' instead of implying myself in the first person. But even then, its a question. I simply did not call him a racial slur. Anyway you read it.

Please excuse my mistake of going too far, and let it go.. we all screw up. I'm already feeling really, really, really bad about it, and already apologized. Rubbing it in my face isn't helping. :(

[Ransom]

Now that I'm calmed down, I'm going to further explain that...
I didn't call him a racial slur. EVER, even before I edited the post. I asked the question in a way that was very misinterpreted and didn't get the correct point across. The question wasn't calling him a slur. I should have said it better, but I seriously lack social skills and make mistakes. I should have worded it as ''would you say it wasn't racism if someone called you a racial slur?'' instead of implying myself in the first person. But even then, its a question. I simply did not call him a racial slur. Anyway you read it.

Please excuse my mistake of going too far, and let it go.. we all screw up. I'm already feeling really, really, really bad about it, and already apologized. Rubbing it in my face isn't helping. :(Fully agree with you, Kane. If someone took the time to read what you actually said, you weren't using it on anyone.

Unfortunately too many people jumped to conclusions, as they often do in the heat of the moment. I used to think that'd never happen to me, but God... recent real life events have really let my own inner monster out.

Anyway it's resolved for the moment so let's drop the issue. None of this makes a single future con better.

[Arking]

I apologize for either of you seeing my point in the way you have, I was simply talking out loud to speculate about the banning. My intent wasn't to rub your bad judgment in your face and for what it's worth I did read your statement several times and fully understood what your intents were which is why I did not report your post but did screencapture it. Instead I made sure not to quote it and asked that any quotations of it were edited or omitted as it's the sort of thing that doesn't need immortalization on a forum.

[Ransom]

I apologize for either of you seeing my point in the way you have, I was simply talking out loud to speculate about the banning. My intent wasn't to rub your bad judgment in your face and for what it's worth I did read your statement several times and fully understood what your intents were which is why I did not report your post but did screencapture it. Instead I made sure not to quote it and asked that any quotations of it were edited or omitted as it's the sort of thing that doesn't need immortalization on a forum.She apologised and edited the offending post, even though the way the original question was worded she wasn't using a slur on anyone. I'd phrase that earlier speculative post to avoid saying she did something she didn't.

Anyway she didn't name-call and took it all back -- that's the reason she did nothing worthy of a suspension.

[Arking]

That is true, as evidenced by the fact she is not suspended.

On the matter of whether she used the slur on someone, we'll have to agree to disagree. As someone who's been hypothetically threatened and warned with the use of slurs against my personhood I see it a bit differently than everyone else and that's ok. Perhaps it's my line of work and the frequency of such "what if I" comments that makes me more sensitive to the first inclinations and thought processes of others when it comes to such matters, I find it disappointing and upsetting nonetheless. Again my perspective is different, but it's not something I pursued with a sense of authority on the matter.

[Ransom]

That is true, as evidenced by the fact she is not suspended.

On the matter of whether she used the slur on someone, we'll have to agree to disagree. As someone who's been hypothetically threatened and warned with the use of slurs against my personhood I see it a bit differently than everyone else and that's ok. Perhaps it's my line of work and the frequency of such "what if I" comments that makes me more sensitive to the first inclinations and thought processes of others when it comes to such matters, I find it disappointing and upsetting nonetheless. Again my perspective is different, but it's not something I pursued with a sense of authority on the matter.Sure -- disagreement is no excuse to be uncivil or insulting to anyone. Sorry to hear you've had those experiences.

[Arking]

Sure -- disagreement is no excuse to be uncivil or insulting to anyone. Sorry to hear you've had those experiences.

There was no intent to be uncivil or insulting, I do mean to apologize for the misunderstanding of my post which was never my intent. I simply spoke on the subject in the desire to understand whether there was a previous thread of commentary that could have been omitted when considering all of the evidence available. I've never directed any ill will towards any persons to that end, so if I've insulted someone it is entirely indirect.

[Ransom]

There was no intent to be uncivil or insulting, I do mean to apologize for the misunderstanding of my post which was never my intent. I simply spoke on the subject in the desire to understand whether there was a previous thread of commentary that could have been omitted when considering all of the evidence available. I've never directed any ill will towards any persons to that end, so if I've insulted someone it is entirely indirect.I should apologise, I wasn't clear -- the "uncivil and insulting" part wasn't aimed at anything you said, but those people who've slurred you in the past. It's more a general observation about conflict between people.

[Arking]

I should apologise, I wasn't clear -- the "uncivil and insulting" part wasn't aimed at anything you said, but those people who've slurred you in the past.
Ah, thank you for the clarification.

[AniaR]

Kane said what a lot of people were thinking, but in a poor execution of words. It's not OK to call someone a racial or sexist slur. We all agree that mers of color will face more walls then white mers, that's not up for debate. The point I saw made was they wouldn't allow that, so why are they surprised women wont allow ourselves to be called all these sexist slurs as well. it's not, "not sexist" just because they say so. Kane apologized, and took responsibility. These people haven't and continue to make social media posts/videos using the words. Publicly. The whole world SEES this stuff? kane's comment while precariously written, didn't break forum rules.

As a merman he has a following, little boys look up to him. Whether he thinks he's just being funny or not, it's telling young boys this behaviour is OK. our industry is female dominated and most of us have been called these names in the industry from mermen or clients. It's time to put the boundary down that you can dislike someone or disagree all you want. But some things are off limits for the greater good. You can't go on about wanting to be an advocate but then suddenly advocacy standards don't apply to you.

[Arking]

Agreed this was a critical failure when approaching this circumstance and from what I understood it came from a belief in equity rather than equality standards. I certainly don't agree with equity conditions when it comes to respecting others whom hold a higher position of privilege. Treating others as you'd like to be treated applies here and doesn't stomp on the affirmative approach to helping those who face inequality in the industry. Rise above the current instead of swimming below it. :cthulhu:

[AniaR]

well I'm glad everyone is calmed down, Happy Friday from "Canada dry" :)

https://scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29243736_2067917896819916_6393012619233394509_n.jp g?oh=015b6441b8e3ad8824700bc7da585cc2&oe=5AFFEE4C

[Mermaid Kane]

well I'm glad everyone is calmed down, Happy Friday from "Canada dry" :)

https://scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/29243736_2067917896819916_6393012619233394509_n.jp g?oh=015b6441b8e3ad8824700bc7da585cc2&oe=5AFFEE4C

Haha, nice!! :D

[Keiris]

Hahahahaha! Well at least you have a good sense of humor about it! I admire that.

[Winged Mermaid]

Three accounts have been banned from the site. Jukumerboii, Arion, and RomanLaveau. Though it isn't entirely clear as to why beyond them putting down another mer in their comments. The post above by Winged indicates she only intended to take that action if they persisted in their discourse " Take some time to cool off, or I'll make you take the time." but all of that happened prior to her warning. Also Mermaid Kane is not banned from the group despite referring to Roman using a very offensive racial slur which was later edited so perhaps some comments have been removed. It's all very confusing and likely only temporary so I wouldn't be too concerned.

I gave them all suspensions because they broke the no name calling rule. I decided after I posted that I give too many warnings and don't put enough action behind it, so people just keep on doing it. The suspensions are less than a week, a "here's a slap on the wrist, but watch yourself and obey the rules next time" kind of thing. Plus it gave those people much needed time to cool off, which judging from how long things went on, they needed it. If these people break the rules again, next time I won't be so lenient.

As for Kane, she wasn't calling anyone a slur but using it as an example. To quote her pre edited version, "Roman. I suppose, in your line of logic, you wouldn't call it racism if I called you [******]?". She realized her mistake in wording, edited it quickly, and apologized profusely. She did not call anyone a slur but used it as an example to make a point, but realized it was greatly insensitive and immediately took action in editing and apologizing. I believe it was not an example of calling by saying "what if I" - like some people do- because of the sincerity of her follow up posts. So I did not take any action on her account.

Hope that clears some things up :) Sorry for the delay in responding- I've had a lot going on!

[Mermaid Persephone]

I just wanna say I'm getting really tired of men thinking it's okay to call women bitches, hoes, c****, etc. IT IS NOT OKAY. THOSE ARE NOT YOUR WORDS. Never, ever, ever call someone that unless she (don't call men that; it's not their word and is usually used to further denigrate women whether because it's used disparagingly or jokingly---STILL NOT OKAY) says you can. In that case, call HER that and no other woman. And don't do it to her back. For instance, my husband and I have a BDSM relationship and he can call me those words under the terms he and I have discussed. Other men cannot. Ever. It's sexist. And to see men here flinging it about casually like women are not still oppressed using those words... seriously? I hope those individuals have learned their lessons.

[Merman Arion]

A. R. I. O. N!
LIL GIRL,
PLEASE LETS NOT START THIS WAR!!!!
Cuz I've been waiting...out of all the things I posted, your lame ass just HAD to come for me for number 6! I bet your ass was itching to type that foolishness!

You still mad that Davey and I CHOOSE to put mermaid in the title!!?? Why does using the word merMaid have to be considered click bait?? Why are u so jellyfish about it?!?! As soon as the video got posted your sorry ass was the ONLY ONE hating off the video cuz of something as small as it being called the Gay Mermaid !!!! What makes YOU The merm name police?!?

I already explained my point on that, not gonna do it again. You have your opinion, I have mine.

https://media.giphy.com/media/NmHIMCTJTTN1C/giphy.gif
https://media.giphy.com/media/NmHIMCTJTTN1C/giphy.gif
https://media.giphy.com/media/NmHIMCTJTTN1C/giphy.gif

[Mermaid Kane]

As for Kane, she wasn't calling anyone a slur but using it as an example. To quote her pre edited version, "Roman. I suppose, in your line of logic, you wouldn't call it racism if I called you [******]?". She realized her mistake in wording, edited it quickly, and apologized profusely. She did not call anyone a slur but used it as an example to make a point, but realized it was greatly insensitive and immediately took action in editing and apologizing. I believe it was not an example of calling by saying "what if I" - like some people do- because of the sincerity of her follow up posts. So I did not take any action on her account.
Thank you so much for having compassion.. I caused a massive kerfuffle, and I am SO SORRY to everyone who has to see it and feel it. It was immature and insensitive, and it will NOT happen again. :c

[Merman Arion]

Why are u so jellyfish about it?!?!

Trust me, I have met you and I have NOTHING to be jealous for.

[AniaR]

I just wanna say I'm getting really tired of men thinking it's okay to call women bitches, hoes, c****, etc. IT IS NOT OKAY. THOSE ARE NOT YOUR WORDS. Never, ever, ever call someone that unless she (don't call men that; it's not their word and is usually used to further denigrate women whether because it's used disparagingly or jokingly---STILL NOT OKAY) says you can. In that case, call HER that and no other woman. And don't do it to her back. For instance, my husband and I have a BDSM relationship and he can call me those words under the terms he and I have discussed. Other men cannot. Ever. It's sexist. And to see men here flinging it about casually like women are not still oppressed using those words... seriously? I hope those individuals have learned their lessons.

Exactly. <3 <3 I also understand Kane's point. You can't be advocating for equality for races, while also stepping on women. Women built up this community and this industry. It wouldn't exist if not for women. You don't get to call us hoes every time you disagree or get mad.

[inanna]

can i be a rake instead?

i'm joking

[Ransom]

can i be a rake instead?

i'm jokingBy all means. Anyone who steps on you regrets it in short order ;)

[Ransom]

Far better to build up in speech than tear down. That applies to anyone.

Brett McKay puts it well: https://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/08/12/be-a-modern-knight-protecting-your-lady-in-the-21rst-century/

[RomanLaveau]

lol for all the people talking about terms. I will continue to use AAVE whenever I feel like it, and you. can. get over how I use AAVE. So thats that. Thats all I'm saying on this, and you can reply but your opinion on our dialect and how we speak is irrelevant. So bloop

[AniaR]

Hmm I didn't realize AAVE (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/African-American_Vernacular_English) included calling women discriminatory terms (https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/apr/28/men-nicknames-for-women-sexist).

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/apr/28/men-nicknames-for-women-sexist
https://www.cnn.com/2015/08/10/opinions/drexler-rbf/index.html

[AniaR]

Another great one too:
https://verysmartbrothas.theroot.com/why-you-should-stop-addressing-and-referring-to-women-a-1819180317

A well respected black author, and editor in chief, who regularly writes for GQ explains why calling women "females" is derogatory in the way it's been used in this thread.

[Mermaid Kane]

Thanks for sharing those, Raina!

[Mermaid_Adora]

So I really need to vent, but this person that I'm venting about is on all the Facebook mermaid forums even though the aren't a mermaid so I decided to vent here!!!! I really need to get this off my chest and I know other mermaids will understand my frustration.

I work at a mermaid themed restaurant as a full time performing mermaid which is a dream come true for me. There are lots of cons that come with this job that I can choose to ignore but sometimes it gets so frustrating! The owner sees herself as a real professional mermaid even though she has had no training and doesn't swim which I'm completely fine with, but her daughter who works in a mermaid themed bar came down with a group of friends. They call themselves the "mermaids" and they made an event about themselves coming down to visit. The girls don't actually own any tails so the restaurant had to use a picture of me in my silicone to promote the event. Families are going to come expecting a real mermaid pod squad, what they are going to see is a bunch of girls swimming in fin fun tails drinking. They are calling themselves professional mermaids and they actually tried to alert the media to their presence. It's just highly frustrating and it downgrades all the professionalism, work, and qualifications I have.

Thanks for letting me rant!

[AniaR]

they can't use your photo to advertise an event without your consent.

[inanna]

O.o holy crap. ditto on what raina said, and you should absolutely fight that since it's basically false advertising.

[Mermaid_Adora]

Not only is it false advertising, but apparently the "mermaids" weren't even in tails last night. They were just at the bar drinking the entire time. If all it took to be a mermaid is to sit and drink like a fish why the carp am I working on my free-diving certification as well? It feels like a slap to my face to work really hard at achieving my dream of becoming a 100% mermaid and then they advertise random girls drinking at the bar as a mermaid event as well.

[Mermaid Ankhali]

Not only is it false advertising, but apparently the "mermaids" weren't even in tails last night. They were just at the bar drinking the entire time. If all it took to be a mermaid is to sit and drink like a fish why the carp am I working on my free-diving certification as well? It feels like a slap to my face to work really hard at achieving my dream of becoming a 100% mermaid and then they advertise random girls drinking at the bar as a mermaid event as well.

Am I the only one who feels like this may be a consequence of the mermaid fad that's going around nowadays?


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[Ransom]

Not only is it false advertising, but apparently the "mermaids" weren't even in tails last night. They were just at the bar drinking the entire time. If all it took to be a mermaid is to sit and drink like a fish why the carp am I working on my free-diving certification as well? It feels like a slap to my face to work really hard at achieving my dream of becoming a 100% mermaid and then they advertise random girls drinking at the bar as a mermaid event as well.Really sorry to hear that, Adora. I trust you've mentioned this to your boss and highlighted your issue?

I don't know the specifics of the event, but they shouldn't be taking your services and picture for granted.

Go ahead with learning freediving, though! It's a valuable skill, and one I hope you'll enjoy for yourself.

[inanna]

Not only is it false advertising, but apparently the "mermaids" weren't even in tails last night. They were just at the bar drinking the entire time. If all it took to be a mermaid is to sit and drink like a fish why the carp am I working on my free-diving certification as well? It feels like a slap to my face to work really hard at achieving my dream of becoming a 100% mermaid and then they advertise random girls drinking at the bar as a mermaid event as well.

(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ *insert very long rant full of swearing here*

[Mermaidtanya]

I need to get this off my chest:

I used to date this guy about 3 years ago. I broke up with him because he only sees me as a mermaid and not as a human being. Whenever I put on my tail he would give me attention and affection, but when the tail is off he ignored me and neglected me. Eventually, I find out he's been flirting with other girls behind my back and I got tired of him making excuses about not spending time with me. After I broke up with him he proceeds to harass and stalk any mermaid performer in DFW. He would send creepy messages to my mersisters and ask them to do certain poses that made them feel uncomfortable. He even tried to show up at my church after we broke up to stalk me. In the past year I found out he got banned from the Oklahoma Renaissance festival because he was caught harassing the mermaids there. Because he acts inappropriately with me and other mermaid performers in DFW, I was too scared to perform as a mermaid for a while. He is the reason why I feel paranoid and anxious all the time. My doctor diagnosed me with anxiety after all this. I've been taking antidepressants since and been slowly getting over my situation. My ex haven't tried to stalk me for a while, but I still feel wary of him showing up at our local anime and comic cons. I wish I could post his name here so I could warn you all about who to avoid at all costs.

[Ransom]

I wish I could post his name here so I could warn you all about who to avoid at all costs.

Whoa, Tanya. Looks like you dodged a harpoon there.

There's a thread under General Community Discussions called "A Guide to Unwanted Contact" where you can warn the community here. Link: http://mernetwork.com/index/showthread.php?t=8927

There does need to be evidence -- screenshots of those messages and written warnings from his targets should suffice.

[Mermaidtanya]

Thanks for sharing that Mervert forum. I just posted my situation and screenshots to that page!


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[Ransom]

Thanks for sharing that Mervert forum. I just posted my situation and screenshots to that page!


Sent from my iPhone using MerNetworkYou're welcome, stay safe out there!

[Mermaid Persephone]

lol for all the people talking about terms. I will continue to use AAVE whenever I feel like it, and you. can. get over how I use AAVE. So thats that. Thats all I'm saying on this, and you can reply but your opinion on our dialect and how we speak is irrelevant. So bloop

That is not AAVE. You know it, I know it. Everyone here knows it. You just are a sexist hypocrite (as evidenced by your behavior) who believes he should be allowed to say whatever he wants, but wants to police others.

Or you're actually that ignorant. Take your pick.

For everyone who might read this. It is not okay to use sexist, ableist, racist, or other discriminatory terminology toward others unless you and the specific individual have decided otherwise. And then those things are only allowable with that person and in those situations.

You don't have to stand by while people call men or women "cu***" or "bi*****". Call those people out, same as you should when it comes to some white guy using the n word or the use of homophobic verbiage. If I'm around, I will back you up.

[Mermaid Whisper]

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[PearlieMae]

That is not AAVE. You know it, I know it. Everyone here knows it. You just are a sexist hypocrite (as evidenced by your behavior) who believes he should be allowed to say whatever he wants, but wants to police others.

Or you're actually that ignorant. Take your pick.

For everyone who might read this. It is not okay to use sexist, ableist, racist, or other discriminatory terminology toward others unless you and the specific individual have decided otherwise. And then those things are only allowable with that person and in those situations.

You don't have to stand by while people call men or women "cu***" or "bi*****". Call those people out, same as you should when it comes to some white guy using the n word or the use of homophobic verbiage. If I'm around, I will back you up.

:thumbs-up: :clap:

[Mermaid Mystery]

i don't think it's anyone's place here to tell kenny (a black man) what is and isn't AAVE if you aren't personally black but go off i guess


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[Mermaid Whisper]

The quoted post was also nearly a month ago, is there something new that sparked it again?

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[Mermaid Mystery]

The quoted post was also nearly a month ago, is there something new that sparked it again?

Sent from my [device_name] using MerNetwork mobile app

that's exactly what i was wondering too


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[RomanLaveau]

Lmaoooo ok soooooo if you are a WHITE WOMAN (so ALL of you) please understand I did not read your comment in regards to me or AAVE, I do not care about your opinion on what AAVE is or isn’t. Colonizers love to tone police, my favorite has been posting screen shots of these arguments in black groups and everyone just having a ball, i’d Post those convos too buuuut you do not belong in our spaces. And with that being said, I truly and honestly hope you stay mad, because I know y’all will 😘 ✌🏾

[RiverDragonKaringan]

Lmaoooo ok soooooo if you are a WHITE WOMAN (so ALL of you) please understand I did not read your comment in regards to me or AAVE, I do not care about your opinion on what AAVE is or isn’t. Colonizers love to tone police, my favorite has been posting screen shots of these arguments in black groups and everyone just having a ball, i’d Post those convos too buuuut you do not belong in our spaces. And with that being said, I truly and honestly hope you stay mad, because I know y’all will [emoji8] [emoji1479]Not exactly a diplomatic person, are you? 1. Sexist language is sexist language. It is not your "culture" or "dialect" to be sexist, like it or not.
2. It is not your fault you never learned how to respect women in the past, but now it is, we called you out on it, and you're being rude by ignoring the problem.
3. You are not queen of the world, whether you think you are or not, so step it down and learn some humility.

You're an adult, act like one.

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[Mermaid Persephone]

I don't think it is any man's (Kenny is a man) place to tell me I don't have the right to be offended by the use of the word "cunt" or "bitch."

Using those words in the way he used them is not particular to AAVE. It happens in MUSE and other languages all the time. That means, gasp, it's a societal issue. And as pointed out, I am a woman. A disabled, bisexual woman, who people people have called those terms because I have the audacity to speak out against being treated like a piece of meat.

I have the right to tell a man to stop using those words, because those words cause issues for women.

Here's the thing, Kenny. You can use AAVE. Your have that right. Cool. I'm not arguing that. That would be ridiculous. What I am saying is that, as man, using some of the words you have used in this thread, you are spreading ideology about women that is extremely damaging. And your excuse is that it is a linguistic norm. It shouldn't be. Instead of getting defensive, you have the opportunity room decide to make a change. Stop using language that has been used throughout history to belittle or dehumanize women.

I am not a white woman trying to tone police a black man. I am a woman begging a man to use his place in the world to lift women up instead. Or just stop causing more harm. Did you know my biological father carved the "cunt" into the kitchen table when my mom dared have the discussion about leaving him? My earliest memories are men using those words to keep women "in their place." And this isn't a "white" thing. It's intersectional. Violence and abuse toward women happens across the world, throughout all races. And it needs to stop. The words need to stop, the ideology nerds to stop.

So take this chance to rethink things. All I'm asking is that you refrain from using words that perpetuate ideologies that damage women. I don't think that's much to ask.

If you can't, I'll be an adult and block you so I won't have to see your sexism. But I'd rather we get along. And that no woman has to see that you value them so little.

[AniaR]

sexist men aren't interested in changing their sexist ways ladies. It's sad how rampant it seems to be. I think the link about referring to us as "females" what pretty poignant. Hold these guys accountable for their own dramatic behaviour (because apparently only us "bitchy females" are dramatic) and they deflect to sexist behaviour. They dish it out CONSTANTLY but can't take being held accountable, ever. Then some of these guys complain about not getting gigs and wonder why when they publicly spew this stuff...

Folly, if they use it, just report the post and move on. It's sad that in a female dominated, and female founded industry, basic respect for women is still lacking, but they'll make up whatever excuses they can. Never open to change, or accountability.

I am curious what spurned this on this time tho.

[Mermaidtanya]

Lmaoooo ok soooooo if you are a WHITE WOMAN (so ALL of you) please understand I did not read your comment in regards to me or AAVE, I do not care about your opinion on what AAVE is or isn’t. Colonizers love to tone police, my favorite has been posting screen shots of these arguments in black groups and everyone just having a ball, i’d Post those convos too buuuut you do not belong in our spaces. And with that being said, I truly and honestly hope you stay mad, because I know y’all will [emoji8] [emoji1479]

Last time I checked I’m actually Asian.


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[Mermaid Momo]

While calling women derogatory terms is not a part of AAVE as in it isn't integral to the language/dialect and is more so misogyny that is prevalent in all languages and dialects it is still no one's place to police what is and isn't AAVE if you do not speak it. That includes ALL non black (more specifically non black american) people. So you can asian, latinx, whites, native, etc and you are still out of pocket if you attempt to police AAVE and define what it is and isn't because it isn't for you to define.


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[AniaR]

I appreciate your input Momo, That's why I posted some articles by Black authors :) I don't feel the calling us names because he was held accountable was a case of anything other than good ol fashion defensive sexism. We can be respectful of AAVE without letting him use it as an excuse to just be sexist and trolly. Cuz the ONLY time he does it on this site, is when someone is holding him accountable or disagreeing with him. I think the inserting of AAVE was just an effort to distract the conversation and intentionally cause a spin off debate rather than admit it's not cool to call women names when he disagrees with them. But if he's going to pull it up in his defense, I just left some articles from black people for him to consider. There is a blanket rule of no name calling in a derogatory way on mernetwork, and he experienced a suspension because of it. I and many others have him blocked on FB so he can say whatever he wants, but here, thems the rules. If you can't disagree with women without resorting to sexist name calling, don't participate in the forum that is 90% women is my thinking. Self regulation




While calling women derogatory terms is not a part of AAVE as in it isn't integral to the language/dialect and is more so misogyny that is prevalent in all languages and dialects it is still no one's place to police what is and isn't AAVE if you do not speak it. That includes ALL non black (more specifically non black american) people. So you can asian, latinx, whites, native, etc and you are still out of pocket if you attempt to police AAVE and define what it is and isn't because it isn't for you to define.


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For anyone interested, a black author writes about sexist language in the hip hop world too: https://49thshelf.com/Books/H/Hip-Hop-World

[RiverDragonKaringan]

I appreciate your input Momo, That's why I posted some articles by Black authors :) I don't feel the calling us names because he was held accountable was a case of anything other than good ol fashion defensive sexism. We can be respectful of AAVE without letting him use it as an excuse to just be sexist and trolly. Cuz the ONLY time he does it on this site, is when someone is holding him accountable or disagreeing with him. I think the inserting of AAVE was just an effort to distract the conversation and intentionally cause a spin off debate rather than admit it's not cool to call women names when he disagrees with them. But if he's going to pull it up in his defense, I just left some articles from black people for him to consider. There is a blanket rule of no name calling in a derogatory way on mernetwork, and he experienced a suspension because of it. I and many others have him blocked on FB so he can say whatever he wants, but here, thems the rules. If you can't disagree with women without resorting to sexist name calling, don't participate in the forum that is 90% women is my thinking. Self regulation





For anyone interested, a black author writes about sexist language in the hip hop world too: https://49thshelf.com/Books/H/Hip-Hop-WorldAgreed, Raina. As a hobbyist linguist, I was upset to see something unique and significant be used for an excuse like this. I may not be black, but I do understand and appreciate language.

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[Venessa Louisiana Mermaid]

Also, as a fellow Black mermaid, melanin is not an excuse for utter rudeness and disrespect.


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THAT PART. Thank you and goodnight.

[NomadicMermaid]

So my friend started mermaiding just a few months ago and, even though she wasn’t the strongest swimmer to begin with, is an incredible mermaid. She would meet me every week (sometimes twice a week) to work swimming and tricks and spent over a month agonizing over her mermaid name. She wanted something completely unique and suited to her personality (don’t we all?). Anyways she ended up choosing an incredibly unique name, for her privacy we’ll say Mermaid Unique. We did several birthday parties together and everyone swooned over what a great performer she was and how great she was with kids - one Mol in particular couldn’t stop asking about getting her to work some pool parties and asking where to get her own tail. We encouraged her to try mermaiding and even offered to meet up to swim together. Well, long story short - about a week ago the mom purchased a fabric tail and started calling herself Sirené Unique, trying to get gigs in the same town. My friend only found out because one of her previous clients called her to confirm she would be at a birthday party because her daughter had drawn a picture to give her. This mom NEVER mentioned wanting to do gigs or apparently practiced before the party because it was a disaster. My friend called me in TEARS because she got an angry email from one of the moms whose son had an awful time. Keep in mind, my friend wasn’t even aware the other mom was doing this until two days before the party. She has no idea what to do and asked me for advice. I don’t know what to tell her! I sugggested contacting the other mom via Facebook and asking to meet but apparently she blocked my friend. Should she change her name to protect her reputation?? I’m at a complete loss and honestly heartbroken for her. I know there are multiple mermaids with similar names but this one truly wasn’t even invented as a word or name before.

[Mermaid Lunette]

So my friend started mermaiding just a few months ago and, even though she wasn’t the strongest swimmer to begin with, is an incredible mermaid. She would meet me every week (sometimes twice a week) to work swimming and tricks and spent over a month agonizing over her mermaid name. She wanted something completely unique and suited to her personality (don’t we all?). Anyways she ended up choosing an incredibly unique name, for her privacy we’ll say Mermaid Unique. We did several birthday parties together and everyone swooned over what a great performer she was and how great she was with kids - one Mol in particular couldn’t stop asking about getting her to work some pool parties and asking where to get her own tail. We encouraged her to try mermaiding and even offered to meet up to swim together. Well, long story short - about a week ago the mom purchased a fabric tail and started calling herself Sirené Unique, trying to get gigs in the same town. My friend only found out because one of her previous clients called her to confirm she would be at a birthday party because her daughter had drawn a picture to give her. This mom NEVER mentioned wanting to do gigs or apparently practiced before the party because it was a disaster. My friend called me in TEARS because she got an angry email from one of the moms whose son had an awful time. Keep in mind, my friend wasn’t even aware the other mom was doing this until two days before the party. She has no idea what to do and asked me for advice. I don’t know what to tell her! I sugggested contacting the other mom via Facebook and asking to meet but apparently she blocked my friend. Should she change her name to protect her reputation?? I’m at a complete loss and honestly heartbroken for her. I know there are multiple mermaids with similar names but this one truly wasn’t even invented as a word or name before.


that sucks so bad! I'm so sorry for your friend!

Generally, personally I would also suggest simply trying to get in touch with the person in question, but if she met you and your friend, heard her name, took y'alls tips, and then blocked her after basically stealing her name, I am afraid that all points to her knowing exactly what she was doing i.e. copying your friends unique name and trying to steal her role even though she could have just been her own mermaid.

my advice is (Oh sorry, are you looking for advice? I /think/ you are considering your wording, but if not just skip every paragraph below this one except the last sentence lol) it really depends on your friend, if she is non-confrontational, unfortunately the best bet is probably to simply change her name and make sure it is very clear that she has no affiliation with this other person and just let it blow over. It sucks but sometimes if not much can be done then in my opinion simply protecting ones self and just seeing to their own stuff is the most healing and least stressful option. From what I can tell at least.

However, if your friend thinks it's worth it, she could attempt to get some sort of justice or go even further to reach out to this person and get answers, I don't know how effective this would be or even what I would suggest to have this happen, so the only advice I would have for this route is just to be sure that she thinks it's worth it to go on the offensive because that could have quite the snowball effect depending on this person whom already has shown themselves to be a bit sneaky and under handed.

I am so sorry about this and I hope your friend wont be too disheartened for too long! that has to be so frustrating.

[Echidna]

This is a clear case of someone trying to impersonate an already successful mermaid and cash in on her expense.

I've met people who went "oh, so you make money with being a mermaid? Cool, then I can do that too", totally not realizing that they might need some skills too...but directly going to copy a name is a complete scumbag move.
Apparently that person even used your friend's e-mail (?) if she got a complaint that way.

Unless your friend wants to go to court over this, changing her performer name and her websites/e-mails accordingly might indeed be the best move.
As Lunette said, put a disclaimer everywhere that she is a different, unaffiliated person.

[Ransom]

Ouch! At least there's some justice in that the impostor sucked and will think twice before trying that crap again. I hope your friend's rep isn't too badly affected.

Nothing to add that hasn't already been said, but tread carefully and back everything up. Some people just want to watch the world burn.

[Mermaid Alea]

Our local paper did a story on a pod of mermaids here that I didn't even know existed. I checked their Facebook page and noticed a particularly detailed 5 star review they got because a "mermaid made this guy's granddaughter's day for chatting with her, etc". I recognized the review immediately as an encounter I had with a little girl a few days ago so the review was for me, but this is the first time I ever knew about these mermaids. I was a bit upset that they got a review for me and I didn't know why it bothered me, but I calmed down and realized this really is one of those situations where "if you can't beat them, join them" so I'm going to see about attending their next pod meetup. I hope it goes well. I guess I'm also a little upset to know that I don't know what the flip is going on in our own community. Like I had no idea there was a pod of at least 15 mermaids here!? WHAT IS MY LIFE!? Please throw rotten tomatoes at me. Thanks.

[NomadicMermaid]

Update: I just heard back and wanted to share the news. My friend did end up talking with the mom/name stealing mermaid and it sounds like it went as best as can be expected. The other lady apparently didn’t enjoy being a memaid as much as she thought and isn’t going to do parties anymore. (I think she may have also ripped her fabric tail so there’s that.) She denied that what she did with the name was wrong though and said that it wasn’t stealing. Not really much to be done now except move on. My friend is super thrilled she gets to keep her name now and reassured her clients that she had nothing to do with the other lady. Thank you so much for all your suggestions! She is looking into finding some sort of legal protections for her name but probably won’t until she has more steady work as it sounds a little expensive and she is still starting out.

[AniaR]

Our local paper did a story on a pod of mermaids here that I didn't even know existed. I checked their Facebook page and noticed a particularly detailed 5 star review they got because a "mermaid made this guy's granddaughter's day for chatting with her, etc". I recognized the review immediately as an encounter I had with a little girl a few days ago so the review was for me, but this is the first time I ever knew about these mermaids. I was a bit upset that they got a review for me and I didn't know why it bothered me, but I calmed down and realized this really is one of those situations where "if you can't beat them, join them" so I'm going to see about attending their next pod meetup. I hope it goes well. I guess I'm also a little upset to know that I don't know what the flip is going on in our own community. Like I had no idea there was a pod of at least 15 mermaids here!? WHAT IS MY LIFE!? Please throw rotten tomatoes at me. Thanks.

did you reply to the review?? I would of!!!

[Mermaid Alea]

I'm not on Facebook so I can't really reply on there, but I just emailed them because I am interested in meeting up with the pod anyways. I mentioned in my email that the reviewer was actually talking about me and I gave the whole background story as proof. I also realized that was the group's first ever review as well. It was posted on the 12th and I saw the little girl while I was mermaiding down a creek on the 8th. I have zero doubt it was the same people I saw. I sent my boyfriend a screenshot of the review (he was there that day) without giving him context and he was like, "Is that you?" I didn't say hi to that little girl to get 5 stars or anything special, but it kinda sucks to see it credited to some other mermaids.

[Mermaid Machhalee]

Also, as a fellow Black mermaid, melanin is not an excuse for utter rudeness and disrespect.


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The sad thing is, I’ve always seen the drama back and forth on Facebook and I was always so personally one sided about it. I never thought, “let me actually come onto the MerNetwork and see for myself before I cast judgements”. I’ve been part of this community for a long time, just not very vocally involved, but I’ve been personally naive for a long time too and that’s something I apologize for. I’ve NEVER spoken badly about anyone here, but I’ve agreed with arguments and jumped into a few without seeing the whole picture and that was wrong of me. Melanin is never an excuse for nasty words and behaviors, especially when nasty words aren’t even necessary.


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[aurora85]

I wonder if any mers have had a problem with another mer being kinda creepy/controlling towards them? Someone started a pod here and invited me to swim with them -cool right? But the thing is, this person has been kinda weird with me online and is making me think there is something strange going on here. He is constantly trying to call and message me about meeting up for a swim but then in the same breath he tells me all the members of his pod are preteen girls. Whatever? I’m no ageist, but it feels uncomfortable how he talks about these girls. Then there’s the fact that the pod here is completely controlled by him as he made it a page and not a group on Facebook - so only he can post when they swim, where they go, no one can just post up a meetup or even start a discussion. It all feels really strange to me and honestly I think I would rather just swim and be alone than have to deal with this silliness.
Any other mers prefer to just be alone or think a pod should be something every member has a say in and can contribute to? Or am I just a weird one who is jumping at shadows they may not be there?
How are your pods run and organized?
I am in another larger pod and it is a group where I do not feel uncomfortable, but they all live super far away and they do let us all have a say in group matters ect


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[Ransom]

Don't ignore your gut. If you're not comfortable how it's being run, there's zero chance you'll have fun actually being there.

Also, where are those podmates' parents? I don't think they'd just hand their daughters over to him like that.

[AniaR]

there are a few pods where this is a known issue. the "leadership power" goes to someone's heads. You're not the first to bring it up, but usually it's a woman. I'm very uncomfortable hearing this is done by a man. But i've seen it happen before too even on the original mer yuku forum.

where are you located??

[Echidna]

Any other mers prefer to just be alone or think a pod should be something every member has a say in and can contribute to? Or am I just a weird one who is jumping at shadows they may not be there?


no, what you describe definitely sounds fishy and unpleasant.
A pod should ALWAYS be a group where every member can speak up and voice their ideas/concerns whenever they feel like it.
I mean, what's the point otherwise?
I probably would steer clear of a group full of little kids, simply because I'd feel out of place there and they likely wouldn't be comfortable with me either, I know several groups and swimschools of this sort, and they are all run by girls and young women.
Now I don't know this guy, but "collecting" a bunch of small girls and then pre-determining everything gives me weird vibes.
I'd rather swim alone than be involved with that.
You will always have a better time alone than with people who make you uncomfortable.
This is true for any sort of relationship.

[aurora85]

Thank you all. I really was questioning if maybe I was just too used to being alone or something. The whole thing weird me out with the girls all being like 13-14 and the guy being in his 20’s but I don’t wanna say anything in case I am called sexist or something. I would like to think people would question me if I suddenly started hanging out with preteens at my age too!


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