B!TC# IT OUT!

[SeaGlass Siren]

So glad I moved out. I'd been plotting the move out since the 10th grade. Only came to fruition this year.

[Echidna]

Yea, I'd love to, but health and money problems together can be a bitch.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Yeah your situation is a bit complicated ._.

[PearlieMae]

I'm so glad I live alone. It's no accident that my father lives in Hawaii and I live in New Jersey.

[Merman Dan]

There are always Hangover Island (https://www.realestatebook.com/homes/usa/fl/crystal-river/1-hangover-island-id73868160) or that parcel at Cockroach Caye (http://www.caribbeanlandandproperty.com/moredetails.php?645) to consider. Mermaid Retreat, anyone? ;)

[Sabrina the Selkie]

~~~~sympathy~~~~
The night went as well as could truly be expected, I suppose.

Good luck with the apartment hunt. I hope you can avoid moving in with them!

[PhaylennMurúch]

there are ALWAYS other options than living with your family. Even extended stay hotels are an option.
Do you know what they say when friends ask what you're up to? Bet you it's a variant of "nothing much"
They embarrassed you in front of everybody on purpose, to punish you for not wanting to lay flatter like a good little doormat.

I am so proud of how you did the evening! I know it hurts, disentangling yourself from the situation, removing yourself from the dynamic is so hard but once all the toxicity falls away you will feel SO good!

[Keiris]

I'm so glad I live alone. It's no accident that my father lives in Hawaii and I live in New Jersey.
LOVE living alone! So great not to put up with anyone's BS.

[Mermaid Mystery]

boo at the zoo is a WEEK early, which means my plans of working on Halloween were a waste. I guess I'll beg to work those days, hopefully my bomb costume will be done by then. but seriously, it's a week early and a few days after my birthday, so I'm not sure if I can do it.

[Starfrit]

I'm losing my goddamn mind lately.

>Got let go from work a couple of weeks ago (store went out of business), and finding a job is a nightmare right now. EVERYWHERE here has signs up looking for applicants, but I've only gotten one call back about an interview... And I thought I nailed that interview, but I haven't heard back yet. It's got me nervous and my confidence is at an all-time low right now. With any luck I'll hear back about an interview at another spot tomorrow, but I'm kinda worried...

>I filed for Employment Insurance over a week ago, did all of it online. Now I'm stuck in limbo while my useless ex-boss slacks off on doing up everyone's ROEs... Legally she has until Wednesday to get them done, but even still. I'm just tired of all this dicking around, especially since I haven't been able to afford my own groceries in weeks as it is.

>I'm going to be nearly $300 short on rent this month and that's scaring the shit out of me. There's nothing I can really do about it at this point. My boyfriend can't afford to cover it for me, which means I'll likely have to ask my parents for help... And I hate doing that. They're always cool about helping out with anything, but when it comes to money... I just feel like some kind of parasite. $300 is a LOT of money to me. The conversation is gonna have to happen at some point though, I know, it's just... Awkward.

>I'm turning 25 next month. I'm supposed to be excited about it but honestly I'm just kind of depressed. People are expecting me to do some big thing for it, but... I don't know. Part of me wants to, because I want to do something fun and awesome with my friends ("Treat yo self," right?), but at the same time... Money's a huge problem right now, I don't even know what I'd do because there's not really a whole lot to do here, and I have a pretty long history of my birthday plans turning into disappointing flops anyway, so mostly I just think I'm gonna hide at home with my cellphone off and just kind of avoid people and watch Netflix, or something.

>Ultimately, all I want for my birthday is a ticket off this miserable fucking rock but I know it isn't going to happen. I haven't been off this thing in over a decade. Never been farther than Toronto. I'm sick of feeling caged here where the only thing anyone ever wants to do is get drunk, get high, and get knocked up when they're 17. There's no opportunity here for me to get into the careers I want to and it's killing me. I can't even go swimming in my tail anywhere because it's too cold outdoors, tails are banned indoors, I'm the only one around here with a tail and it's really fucking with my self-consciousness, so my tail's likely going to have to sit in storage for 6-8 months until next year, I guess.

>My creative projects aren't working out the way I want them to and it's only making my low confidence problem worse. I've been wanting to save up for a matching top and some accessories for my tail pretty much ever since I ordered the dang thing, but nothing I can find online fits the style I want, when I try to sit down and design it it doesn't look right on paper, either, so I'm basically stuck. Even if I decided to try making my own stuff, I can't afford it anyway; 90% of what I'd need is impossible to find here, half of it can't be ordered onto the island because of stupid customs crap and what little I CAN order will end up costing over double by the time I've calculated currency conversion, shipping and customs fees (to give an idea, I bought my older sister a pair of Lady and the Tramp dolls from the Disney Store a few years back for her birthday... The dolls were on 2 for $30. Came to just over $40 CAD after the conversion... By the time it got here and I paid the shipping and customs, it was almost $90 CAD. Never again.)

TL;DR — Job hunting sucks, money is the stupidest thing on the fucking planet, this island sucks, self-worth is at an all-time low, birthday is coming up and I hate it, and I can't even do anything right artistically so I'm basically going out of my mind.

[Mermaid Lilium]

*massive Mer-hugs*

Sent from my D5803 using Tapatalk

[Adalira]

First of all, as promised here is the link to the youtube video of me and my brother.
This is the video that was shown at the party Saturday:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxLWla1VgpQ&feature=youtu.be

Thank you everyone again for your words of support!
I was super tired yesterday from the party and actually fell asleep for a bit in the afternoon.
I was a wreck.
Since i slept so poorly i wanted to sleep in his morning to feel a bit more fresh and energetic but then we got woken up by a delivery guy bringing a package.
For some reason my brother keeps having packages delivered here, the kind you need to sign for.
My mother says she has told me many times now to change to adress to their home in stead of ours since everytime we get woken up early and then i have to hear an entire speech on how the house number was impossible to find.
I agree with the delivery man that it is impossible to fine, yet at the same time it is not my fault or wrong doing here.
I called my mom this morning and asked her to please have the adress number/ house number changed since we are tired of being woken up for packages and having the same speech over and over again.
She said she asked my brother mulitple times already but he has not done it yet.
What does my brother expect when we move and the new owners are here in 2 months? Do they need to handle his packages for him?
So i messaged my brother and asked him to please change it.
He wrote me back with a whole lot of excuses on how it was not his fault. I told him that he can still change it today to have the situation prevented next time.
Plus his business is still on this adress as well so he needs to give an adress change to all companies he does business with asap.
I already made the adress change a while ago to prevent misstakes from happening.
He did not reply to my last email in which i told him he needs to change his adress asap and go to the chamber of commerce as well to have it changed.
I told my mom that next time i will simply not accept the package anymore and have it returned to the sender, maybe then he will learn.
But my mom told me not to do that since she needs the packages.
Honestly i will refuse it next time, i don't care what will happen.
I deserve a good sleep just like anyone else and i do not want others work dumped on me anymore because others are too lazy to step up and make simple changes.

[PearlieMae]

Screw them. Refuse the packages. It's just another way to manipulate you.

[Mermaid Lilium]

Why do customers think that screaming at staff is going to get them anywhere except nowhere OR escorted off the property?

If you're nice to us we're going to be more likely to go out of our way to be nice and do stuff as a good will gesture.

Being a totally aggressive ass because you can't take being told 'no' is not okay.

Calling back hoping to get a different staff member who is unaware of your previous threatening behavior, in the hope of getting a different answer is also not going to get you anywhere cause guess what we were all in, and yes we COULD infact hear you in the next room over the noise of the crowds and music.

Arghghghghhhhh

*rant over*

Sent from my D5803 using Tapatalk

[PhaylennMurúch]

Screw them. Refuse the packages. It's just another way to manipulate you.

THIS, you are not his secretary (which is what he is treating you as). Send one last message, "from this moment on I will not be accepting any packages that I did not order. All other packages will be refused"
Then post a note on your door, ATTN Delivery persons, *brother name*, *brother business* is not located at this address. Ring bell only for packages being delivered to *Adalira* or *Mr. Adalira*. All other packages will be refused

[PearlieMae]

THIS, you are not his secretary (which is what he is treating you as). Send one last message, "from this moment on I will not be accepting any packages that I did not order. All other packages will be refused"
Then post a note on your door, ATTN Delivery persons, *brother name*, *brother business* is not located at this address. Ring bell only for packages being delivered to *Adalira* or *Mr. Adalira*. All other packages will be refused

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:

[Imogen Finnly]

Here's my bitch: I'm a college student paying $500+ (in Texas, that's expensive) for an apartment, and of the three bedrooms in the place, only mine has a roach infestation :( My roomies have seen maybe one each in the past five months but I have seen more roaches in the past WEEK than I have seen in my entire life. I even had one in my bed! :mad:

I've sprayed, I've had the place exterminated, I've put out baits, but nothing will make them go away! So, I'm paying all this money and I get to sleep on the couch and shower & use the restrooms on campus because I can't use my own. Lovely.
Exactly what pearlie said. I lived in an apartment loaded with them. We had to wash all the dishes every time we wanted to use them. They come out of drains, pipes, electric sockets, holes in walls etc. and you can bleach, scrub and wash all damn day and they will not go away. If your apartment has them, that means the wntirw building is loaded with them. They have to tent the place. And if you move, you have to check everything you own for nests. And irs expensive rebuying furniture. Say bye bye to your fridge.

Sent from my SPH-L710 using Tapatalk

[Imogen Finnly]

If you are allowed a pet, you can also invest in a cat.

I guarantee she'll keep your room bug-free, especially is she is indoors and bored ;)
And totally toxin-free at that!
Be careful if you have posion out though! It might make cats sick if they ingest the roaches with poison.

Sent from my SPH-L710 using Tapatalk

[Naufra]

After reading the current topics, my bitch about having to get blood drawn at the doctor's tomorrow seems less important, even if I am a fainter. Damn, guys. :\

[Ashe]

Ouch, that's never good :( Good luck, all the advice I can give is to take big breaths and let your mind travel elsewhere!

[Naufra]

Thanks, Kalani. I'll probably just nervous-babble like I normally do and they'll worry when I stop talking, lol!

[Mermaid Mystery]

someone pointed out my sweaty hands today and I know it doesn't seem like a big deal but I'm gross. something is wrong with me and it causes me to sweat at least twice as much as an average person my age and it's my biggest insecurity besides body hair and I still can't get over it

[AnnaAbyss]

I have that too. Whoever pointed it out to you was a dickhead.

[Adalira]

Thanks, Kalani. I'll probably just nervous-babble like I normally do and they'll worry when I stop talking, lol!

Good luck! Having blood drawn is never fun :hug:

[Adalira]

someone pointed out my sweaty hands today and I know it doesn't seem like a big deal but I'm gross. something is wrong with me and it causes me to sweat at least twice as much as an average person my age and it's my biggest insecurity besides body hair and I still can't get over it

I have no idea why someone would be an ass and point out to you that you sweat.
Like you would not realize that yourself?
I have the same issue though, i sweat a lot! My hands, armpits and feet are the worst at the moment but at night i sweat everywhere like a pig.
It has been going on for months now.
I have always had sweaty hands and armpits, my feet being this sweaty is new to me though.
If someone would point that out to me i would really be upset since why on earth would you point that out?
The person is sweating...how would they not realize that themselves?
The body hair i can relate to as well....it sucks.
Please don't feel discouraged because some dickhead made a stupid remark :hug:

[Mermaid Ciela]

someone pointed out my sweaty hands today and I know it doesn't seem like a big deal but I'm gross. something is wrong with me and it causes me to sweat at least twice as much as an average person my age and it's my biggest insecurity besides body hair and I still can't get over it

I have really sweaty hands/armpits too!! It gets even worse when I get anxious/nervous which is usually when I need to not be sweaty the most so it's just a bad cycle ugh. I wouldn't jump to saying that something was wrong with you, some people sweat more than others, it is what it is. Whoever pointed it out was a jerk; don't give him/her the satisfaction of letting it bother you. Instead I would almost laugh at them - (sarcasm) "Gee, thanks, Captain Obvious! No one else had noticed that!" (/sarcasm) It'll be okay. One day, that person will have a day when THEY're really sweaty, and maybe someone else will comment on it and the person will know how awkward it is to have it pointed out.


Sent from the engineering wonder that is my shellphone using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Mystery]

thanks for all the support everyone! I feel so much better. The person who pointed it out grabbed my hand in class which is like my biggest fear and that's why I don't like holding hands. I haven't talked to them much since.

[Mermaid Kelda]

I realised I had an assignment due yesterday which I had not even looked at so I've been reading about fireflies for the last 9 hours and I have not slept and did you know sometimes fireflies flash all in unison and no one actually knows why also one species of female will eat the male firefly after they mate and we use the algorithm of flashing patterns to model the synchronisation of wireless networks

Fireflies are rad

[Mermaid Jaffa]

I live in a ground floor unit, there are a lot of roaches here too, whereas my brother who lives on the 3rd floor in another block, rarely have roaches. I think its because we are closer to the ground, that roaches don't have to travel far to find food and cosy places to sleep.

[PearlieMae]

I realised I had an assignment due yesterday which I had not even looked at so I've been reading about fireflies for the last 9 hours and I have not slept and did you know sometimes fireflies flash all in unison and no one actually knows why also one species of female will eat the male firefly after they mate and we use the algorithm of flashing patterns to model the synchronisation of wireless networks

Fireflies are rad

I once had a friend visiting from Ireland, and one evening, bringing in the dishes from the afternoon's barbecue, she came running into the kitchen, desperately whispering, trying not to scream "THE GARDEN IS FULL OF FAIRIES!"

She'd never seen fireflies before. :D

[Mermaid Kelda]

I've never actually seen a firefly in the flesh (I'm not even sure we have them in Australia? Too lazy to google) but I've seen enough Disney movies!

[Merman Dan]

I once had a friend visiting from Ireland, and one evening, bringing in the dishes from the afternoon's barbecue, she came running into the kitchen, desperately whispering, trying not to scream "THE GARDEN IS FULL OF FAIRIES!" She'd never seen fireflies before. :D

Fireflies, faeries.... same same. :) I live on 20 acres in a rural area. When the fireflies are out in force, there are thousands in every tree. It looks like Christmas! But yeah, I know the difference between the two.. we have loads of faeries here in my neck of the woods. They seem just as surprised that I can see them as I am when I manage to "almost see them out of the corner of my eye".

[Theobromine]

Fireflies live in Australia, that was the first place I ever saw them! I saw zillions of them when I lived in Townsville!

I also saw zillions of roaches, for that matter :P
First time I've ever gone out of my way to smash anything with a shoe (I'm the type that catches spiders and puts them outside).

[Mermaid Lilium]

I've never seen a firefly in person either, I'd probably cry at how pretty they are if I did see them lol

Sent from my D5803 using Tapatalk

[CheshireKat]

I live in what is technically considered rural Tennessee and grew up in Oklahoma. They.Are.EVERYWHERE.

Sent from my SGP311 using Tapatalk

[Adalira]

Same here, never seen them but i can only imagine how beautiful it must look!

[CheshireKat]

Well, if anyone ever wants to come up to Tennessee, or trek out to Oklahoma, my family looks at it as 'eh, the more the merrier'. We take our last name very seriously, in that we truly attempt to fill the world with joy.

Sent from my SGP311 using Tapatalk

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Fireflies ARE gorgeous. I live in Illinois, and in the summers I catch them and they just sit in the palm of my had for awhile before zipping off.

[SeaGlass Siren]

i went on a midnight stroll with my friends one night and we got to see a HUGE FIELD OF FIREFLIES. it was like being among a sea of stars. it was quite magical.

[PearlieMae]

While they don't catch the magic of being there...


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCWkzQqO7Ro


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4pWAxnfL8w


Fireflies, faeries.... same same. :) I live on 20 acres in a rural area. When the fireflies are out in force, there are thousands in every tree. It looks like Christmas! But yeah, I know the difference between the two.. we have loads of faeries here in my neck of the woods. They seem just as surprised that I can see them as I am when I manage to "almost see them out of the corner of my eye".

I know just what you mean about seeing them out of the corner your eye!

When I first moved to New Jersey, my wooded yard was so thick with them, you could practically read by their light. Then we had the threat of West Nile Virus and the mosquito eradication program of trucks driving around spraying massive amounts of malathion virtually wiped out the entire firefly (I grew up calling them lightning bugs) population.

Since then, I doubt I see even a hundred in an entire season. :sad eyes:

[Adalira]

Wow, thank you for sharing that video. That looks amazing.
i am sorry to hear that there are not many left in your area though. It looks so magical!

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Fairly minor bitch. I am jumping out of my skin. I have decided on my first choise university, finally. Ritsumeikan Asia Pacific University. They came to talk to my Japanese class today.
And now I really want to go and feel the acceptance terror.

[Azurin Luna]

That sucks :( *huggles*

[Adalira]

So i was at my parents house a few days ago to do laundry.
When i moved into this house my mom told me not to get a washer and dryer since i was by myself and did not have much laundry. She said it was a waste since she and my father had not much laundry either.
Anyway, their pipes are clogged so the past months when i washed laundry i have to stay with the machine and drain the water in buckets and throw it out multiple times each load.
I was there Wednesday like i said, did laundry and rehearsed my 2 songs for the new season, when i was done and ready to leave my dad said:" Can you rehearse a thirds song maybe, since i wrote great lyrics to a song and i would like you to sing that one as well." I said;" Are you serious? You ask me this 1 week before our first show?" Oh btw, he also asked me to find the karaoke/insturmental version online for it. He said he really wants me to do it.
Well it is Saturday now and i have not done anything yet about the song.
I have had a cold for 2 weeks now, hot flashed day and night and barely slept last night.
My parents went to city hall yesterday to talk about building a house for us on their land and city hall agreed but not with the location off the house.
They gave my parents a piece of paper showing where the house could be build....it is a tiny piece of land on their entire land and my parents already have their house there and the old house. There is only a bit of land land on that tiny piece that is allowed. My parents don't want us to build on one side since they feel they loose sunlight (even though there are trees on that part now) and on the other side we will either be surrounded by trees or it may not fit.
My hubby is stressed out since there may not be enough room and we also don't want to be completly next to my parents house since we would have no privacy at all.
My mom said we need to measure things out, they said we could tear down the old house (which is falling apart and not used) and build on there but that will cost a lot of time, work and money which we don't have (especially the money part).
I am looking for houses to rent but there is nothing that is for the needs we have to run our business.
Buying is not an option with the prices over here.
So i looked into Germany, the problem there is though that if we officially move there i loose my retirement money when i turn 65.
I can only build up retirment in Germany if i become a German and get a German passport.
For my hubby who is from America it may be a difficult story as well, we would have to find out if he can get a permit in Germany, he would have to learn german (he is just learning Dutch and would have to start over).
I saw some fixer upper houses for prices we may be able to afford there (buying the house) but like i said, there is so much uncertainty in moving there.......
First things first though, i need to make an appointment with the doctor, i have been pushing it forward for too long.
My hubby just said:" Is your nose bleeding?" and i was like:" It has been bleeding for a week now when i blow my nose." And off course that is not good at all.
This afternoon my mom called me and tried to manipulate/guilt me into something.
I called her back later in the evening and told her no, stood my ground but gave her an alternative, she tried guilting me again, i stood my ground again and she backed down.
It feels good to have a voice and not be guilted/manipulated into things.
You know what the weird part is? I think my parents don't even realize what they are doing. I mean, i don't think they realize how hurtful they are and how awfull it has been and still is for me.
Or maybe they think i just need to do as i am told like a good little girl and think that is just the way it has to be.
Anyway, it is after 11pm and we have not had dinner yet.
My rhythm is completly off because of my cold, my lack of sleep and hot flashes.

[SeaGlass Siren]

In a weird situation where I am pretty much friends with nearly everyone on mernetwork and they're all fighting and it's just become awkward for me because I know they don't have to get along and they're all pretty fucking awesome. but I can't say anything because I only know chunky pieces (pieces nonetheless) of the story so I can't throw in my two cents. Blah.
:I throw my hands up in the air sometimes saying EYO I give up tho!!:

[Echidna]

So i looked into Germany, the problem there is though that if we officially move there i loose my retirement money when i turn 65.
I can only build up retirment in Germany if i become a German and get a German passport.


Do you have any idea what's going on in Germany right now?

Violence and crime (especially arson, theft, and rape) are the highest in Europe, the police is helpless, and the government is 100% insane and hellbent on destroying the country (they even said so literally, as they believe in some nuts ideology).

If you come here, you will not be safe, and on top you will pay with your taxes (one of the highest in the world) for the insanity that's happening right now.
I'm sure very soon there'll be complete anarchy- now already, most criminals go scots-free even for murder because "too little personnel to deal with em".

And I'm not sure if the rest of Europe will be so good if Germany goes down in madness.
Everyone I know who can, has packed their stuff and is moving out to Australia, Canada, and the US.

If your husband is from there, I'd do that too asap.

[ShyKaiju]

In a weird situation where I am pretty much friends with nearly everyone on mernetwork and they're all fighting and it's just become awkward for me because I know they don't have to get along and they're all pretty fucking awesome. but I can't say anything because I only know chunky pieces (pieces nonetheless) of the story so I can't throw in my two cents. Blah.
:I throw my hands up in the air sometimes saying EYO I give up tho!!:

From what I've seen via posts, you've been the most level headed throughout the forum drama. I know that is really hard to not pick sides when friends are fighting, but you seem like a good rock for everybody.
Just my personal opinion :>

[ShyKaiju]

Stay safe Echidna!

[SeaGlass Siren]

From what I've seen via posts, you've been the most level headed throughout the forum drama. I know that is really hard to not pick sides when friends are fighting, but you seem like a good rock for everybody.
Just my personal opinion :>
Thankyou shykaiju I try my best. Ideally id rather not pick sides.

[Adalira]

Do you have any idea what's going on in Germany right now?
It's flooded daily by hundred thousands of illegal immigrants, over 2 million in this year alone.

Violence and crime (especially arson, theft, and rape) are the highest in Europe, the police is helpless, and the government is 100% insane and hellbent on destroying the country (they even said so literally, as they believe in some nuts ideology).

If you come here, you will not be safe, and on top you will pay with your taxes (one of the highest in the world) for the insanity that's happening right now.
I'm sure very soon there'll be complete anarchy- now already, most criminals go scots-free even for murder because "too little personnel to deal with em".

And I'm not sure if the rest of Europe will be so good if Germany goes down in madness.
Everyone I know who can, has packed their stuff and is moving out to Australia, Canada, and the US.

If your husband is from there, I'd do that too asap.

I did hear about the illegal immegrants and the floading of Germany.
We are getting the same here in the Netherlands.
My friend said that if my hubby and I want to rent a house in Holland we need to be very fast because soon all the immegrants will take up all the housing, they will most likely get it for free or super cheap.
It is insanity what is going on with the immegrants right now.
They are fighting amongst each other here.
Tv stations interviewed the immegrants and asked them how they are doing now that they are safe in Holland in figitive centres (big places where they have a general eating room, lots of bedrooms etc) and guess what there replies were.... "We are being treated very poorly, we only get 2 sandwiches for lunch, a dinner and 2 sandwiches in the evening." and " Internet is super slow here, we cant live like this".
I mean...are you kidding me? Why are they not thankful they got a roof over their heads and free food, clothing, bycicles etc?
If you fled your country in fear of your live and your families lives, would you not be so happy and grateful just be alive right now?
Holland is upside down as well, there is a political party that wants all immigrants to get free health care and other crazy ideas.
Off course this needs to be paid for by the tax payers...meaning, all hard working people who get nothing for free.
I fear a lot of problems will happen soon.
Oh get this....in one village they have a refugee place and the males refugees who went to the supermarket complained that the woman working behind the cash register is a woman and they do not want to be helped by a woman so she can no longer work the cash register there....are you freakin kidding me?
My hubby came here to Holland for me and was at the same time happy to have left the US, it seems to be not that great there either with the way hard working people are treated.
We did think of moving there but the cost of actually moving is so high, then finding a place to live and starting completely from scratch with our business....i don't think i have the energy to do it all over again.
I have not had a holiday in years , been working non stop.
I need to have a solution to our housing and need to be able to take a small holiday at some point.
My brother lives in Germany with his wife, houses are so much cheaper there then here that that would be a good solution for us but like i said, there are a lot of down sides to it as well.
And now that you have told me this, it is starting to be more of a "no" for me to move to Germany.
Thank you for your insights and information!

[Echidna]

np, I wouldn't want you to go in unknowingly.

Even in small villages, a female is advised to NOT go outside alone.
Gang-rapes happen everywhere even during the day.

Worst thing is, the whole press is not reporting crimes out of pc-ness, so most of the populace doesn't even know how bad it is unless they are reading the "inofficial" news on the internet (and guess what, they want to censor it now and call everyone who dares to criticize the government "scum" and "terrorists"...)

Houses have already been appropriated by the government for their purposes.
Many schools, sportshalls, and pools have been closed down and are now used as housing.
I'm afraid my last swimming opportunities will be gone soon.

And speaking of health- there have already been dozens of tuberculosis cases, fleas, lice, even leprosy.

But when I want to take my two indoor cats out of the country, I have to carry passports and health certificates like no tomorrow!
MADNESS

[SeaGlass Siren]

Not a big deal but my freakin TV shut off during the last one minute of CSI. Fuck my life.

[MermaidSandie]

@SeaGlass Siren
omg that's the worst
sometimes the littlest things can kick you in the ass

[SeaGlass Siren]

I mised Gil grissom and Sara sidle's rekindling of their love :(

[Fun123joker]

its 12 tils til our year anniversery

he broke up with me

[SeaGlass Siren]

Oh dear joker... I'm sorry..

[Merman Arion]

he broke up with me

Let me slap him!!! :mad:

http://media2.giphy.com/media/1UMKinz6AM6I/giphy.gif

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-H39mqGa1qdY/U3tSLYCU9PI/AAAAAAAARCA/YJV3Nf_Q1l8/w426-h240/1398497776490.gif

[Ashe]

Aw I'm sorry babe :( Sending hugs and kisses your way!
...and a couple of bitch slaps. Arion has the right idea.

[Fun123joker]

yeah thanks you guys. im not angry at him. he needed to break up because he thinks his mental condition isnt safe for a relationship. October is suppose to be our month. im glad he gave me a chance to experience life with him.

[Ashe]

Well in that case, I'm glad that everything worked out better than it could have. Still sending hugs <3

[Fun123joker]

maybe this was a omen. because the him and the last guy (my first 2) both had a fear of water

[Ashe]

Haha! ^^

So while we're on the page of relationships... why is it so dang hard to tell if a girl is flirting with you? Christ, I hate how all the cuties are so flirtatious with their friends. Like, do you not see that I have a crush on you over here? Do you not understand that you're making me go insane?
Ah, the ramblings of a lame teenager.

[Mermaid Kelda]

Right? It seems to be a trend at the moment that straight people are super flirtatious and play-gay. Which, like, sure, is fine and all and certainly better than homophobia, but it makes it very difficult and sometimes super awkward for the rest of us :\

[Amphitrite]

What an awful day. My BEST FRIEND since we were little lives with her wonderful parents and I just learned today that they are having to file for bankruptcy and losing their house and everything! *sobs* I'm truly scared for them. I can't do anything for them. I'm not even THERE. And this among a million other things makes me think GOD, WHAT HAVE I DONE?! In moving out to the middle of this God-forsaken place?! It's so FAR from all my loved ones. I have no one here and I feel I may have made a terrible mistake trusting this rotten program and these people who feel that all a body needs to keep self intact is a bunch of @$^@#^#%& paper pushers. That's not enough for anyone to survive on. I'm passionate about changing this but I just CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! And due to my brain injury I have so much less to keep me together. I get tired a lot physically and mentally and I just can't do it by myself anymore. I'm praying so hard that God shows me what to do because I just don't know anymore. I never should have left my home. Screw those irl who say 'it'll be good for you.' Like Hell! I cry a lot. I'm alone. I'm so alone. I'm never going to injure myself or anything (just in case any of you get concerned, I'm fine) but I am just at the bottom. I can't handle this crap any more. So I've started to look into if there is any financial aid for someone in my situation because sorry not sorry people who are just paid to be here will NEVER be an acceptable substitution for honest-to-God REAL people. The worst part is that I'm slipping in things because I'm so tired all the time and the stress is through the roof and I don't get anything done any more. By God I got myself a job on my own and I'm getting a good grade in my class for goodness' sake! But this stilted conditional shit isn't worth it. I HAVE to find out something else to do because I'm just dying, as a person, as an individual and spiritually. I feel everyone Including ME deserves to be happy where they're at. And the shit and the disdain I get here are not acceptable. I can't even get a hug when I need one. I have no space to think I have nowhere to go. I hate this place. I have a random person sticking their faces in my 'apartment' every two frigging hours. If I have to steal it from someone's metaphorically speaking cold dead whatevers then I will. I'm just super overwhelmed and I have no one to lean on or tell me it'll be okay. I'm mainly online because through this and a few other places those are the only people who give a crap whether I live or die (yes I have family but I NEVER hear from them). I just don't. know. what. to. do. If anyone needs someone to listen or someone to talk to please consider me. I am a good listener and I will be happy when you are happy and sad when you are sad. I have no use here and that's the other side. No one wants my input not even in my own life. And frankly I come from a background where you help each other and stick up for each other and give a crap when someone's in pain. I get to do none of that here and sure as hell no one does that for me. I just... need a vacation or something. I don't know. I want it to be Wednesday night so I can be at church where I know what to do and where I can feel connected. I also really REALLY want my own family. I think I will sign up for my church's thing online (for my whole church denomination which is... I think... worldwide.) I'm 30. I'm okay if God wants me to wait for love ect but I need someone's To love now. I can't just love myself. I mean, you gotta love and care for yourself but I need to be able to care for others too. None of this being the only one to have my own back. None of this bullcrap about 'we should all be able to do it all by ourselves'. I think I'm going through a spot in life where I realize that what I truly value is relationships (which is kinda weird-ish cuz I SUCK at groups and stuff since I'm awkward.). But I just can't be doing this every other day at work too, where someone says 'if this-or-that doesn't get done people will start getting fired'. I can't work with that stress. And by God, I do cherish my online relationships and the many outlets I find online that are not available irl and I swear to God I'm about to take people to task for treating those in their precious program like crap. I'm passionate about this but I feel too little and small and weak to take on the entire ideology that if you lock up a brain injured person in a loveless paper-pusher whiney ignorant place that that could EVER be a growing learning safe environment. I just HATE that people don't get something I see as simplistic that if you don't allow people space and love and nurturing they will end up WORSE. For Goodness sakes you deserve what you get when you do that to people. The up side (and their is one!) is that I can always pray to God and know that he is ultimately in control and even though I don't have people to rely on right now I do have my bath tub my teddy bear (yeah I've got one of those :p ) and church. And books and I can cook some and stuff. I'm researching different methods of baking bread and other foods and I'm realizing that stress really does impede my growth and well-being and that to lessen stress I will have to start cutting things out. I am going to pray that when I talk to my new (scary) store manager-boss that she will listen and that God will give me the words to say. Because all she can do is fire me and if that happens then with hard work and God as my Dad I will find another one. I'll survive because I just KNOW there's a purpose somewhere. And I think I wont be able to finish this homework assignment but I have definitely learned and now I know that taking the step of contacting (read: trying to contact) the brain injury association of the state I live in was a good move.

[Ashe]

I'm PMing you love, stay strong <3 <3 <3

[Mermaid Mystery]

Ughhhhhh so first of all I'm on my period. Great. Tomorrow is the sf swim and I can't go! Not because of my current painful endeavors between me and my uterus, but because guess who has a hockey game! I can't believe this. I have something fun that I want to do maybe (if I'm lucky) once a month. He has hockey practice and games almost every damn day. Because of him I have missed out on so much in life. I have spent probably an entire two years of my life in various hockey rinks instead of enjoying life, and I'm the older child! Why am I not able to do things I like while he's dragged along?! For those of you who are confused I'm referring to my abusive younger brother.

[PhaylennMurúch]

Ughhhhhh so first of all I'm on my period. Great. Tomorrow is the sf swim and I can't go! Not because of my current painful endeavors between me and my uterus, but because guess who has a hockey game! I can't believe this. I have something fun that I want to do maybe (if I'm lucky) once a month. He has hockey practice and games almost every damn day. Because of him I have missed out on so much in life. I have spent probably an entire two years of my life in various hockey rinks instead of enjoying life, and I'm the older child! Why am I not able to do things I like while he's dragged along?! For those of you who are confused I'm referring to my abusive younger brother.

didn't you get a car for your birthday?
eta: not to be snarky, just that if you did you could drive yourself up here

[Mermaid Mystery]

my birthday is next month and I still don't have my permit. If I had a car I'd definitely be going! Speaking of which, I really need to get my permit

[Mermaid Jaffa]

My sister in law just came over with clothes she dug out from her Mum's cupboard. I am so tired of people thinking I want hand me down clothes! My cupboard doesn't even fit more clothes! The sizes she brings me are 14 and 16, she says, "you can wear for sleeping", I say, "No thanks. Too big, won't fit me." Then she gets all upset because I said no to her. Then I say, "Why don't you wear it then?" Then she puts the pants next to herself, "Its too big! Why can't you appreciate and just thank you?" Then I say, "None of my size 12 clothes fit me well anymore since I lost weight from swimming. What makes you think I'll magically fit into a size 14 and 16?" Then she goes off on a rant that I should start learning some etiquette and just be more accepting. My last reply before she went all the door, "Sorry no. I grew up with secondhand toys and shit, I don't want second hand stuff now. How do you think it makes me feel that you always bring stuff you don't want to wear and then just pawn it all on me?"

I think I'll have nap and feel better. I just came back from the pool.

[CheshireKat]

Why doesn't your sister-in-law just donate the clothing? It just seems silly for her to get so upset over you saying you're not interested in old clothing she got from her mother.

Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Why doesn't your sister-in-law just donate the clothing? It just seems silly for her to get so upset over you saying you're not interested in old clothing she got from her mother.

Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk
"Its brand new!"
Her words, not mine.

[MermaidBrynley]

I'm feeling sad. I hope this makes sense to put here.
Last night I logged into my old facebook that I deleted over a year ago and it made me so sad.
Life is SO different and I feel like such a different person in a good and bad way.
I feel like I have made so many mistakes and poor decisions. And now in life I spend my days over thinking, worrying, and just being unsettled.
I don't think I wish I could go back, I think there are just a lot of things I wish I would've handled differently.
And I really miss home. :(
That's all.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

I'm feeling sad. I hope this makes sense to put here.
Last night I logged into my old facebook that I deleted over a year ago and it made me so sad.
Life is SO different and I feel like such a different person in a good and bad way.
I feel like I have made so many mistakes and poor decisions. And now in life I spend my days over thinking, worrying, and just being unsettled.
I don't think I wish I could go back, I think there are just a lot of things I wish I would've handled differently.
And I really miss home. :(
That's all.
Nawww! When I think of Alaska, I see polar bears and ice... Where does one swim in Alaska?

[MermaidBrynley]

Nawww! When I think of Alaska, I see polar bears and ice... Where does one swim in Alaska?
Lol EVERYONE thinks of Alaska that way.
It's only like that at the top of the state. Seriously.
Where I am which is smack in the center, it gets to -50 at the lowest.
Down on the coast it rarely goes below zero and it doesn't snow THAT much.
But where I am, we got 10 inches of snow in 24 hours. AND IT'S STILL SEPTEMBER.
Anyway, I swim in lakes, rivers, and indoor pools :)
When it's warm enough to do so.
Which it is in summer. For about 2 months it gets warm.

[CheshireKat]

"Its brand new!"
Her words, not mine.
I cannot physically roll my eyes hard enough at that statement.

Sent from my SGP311 using Tapatalk

[SeaGlass Siren]

I'm Rollin' so hard they hatin'.
:insert disgust rolling her eyes gif here:

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Life is hard, y'all.
You should drop off a bag of old clothes at your sister in laws and see how SHE likes it, Jaffa. ;)

And I feel you Brynley. I live in a provincial suburb of Chicago, but I'm from Manhattan, so my New York City kid sensibilities are constantly impinged upon. I miss home, too, and I haven't even been to visit in years. But Chicago proper is a good city, and it certainly has it's compensations, despite my dislike of suburbs.

And to Amphitrite, just hold on. The storm will pass eventually. Just live. Make a life for yourself where you are and email, text, Skype your friend. She'll understand that you're doing all you can. You say you find comfort in the church, so take advantage of that. One of the positive things about organized religion is that there is a community that will support you. Reach out to them. If they're worth their salt they'll be a real community for you.

Good luck, Joker! I've had relationships end based on mental health issues.

On a water-related relationship omen note, one of my friends tried to set me up with someone who is actually ALLERGIC to water. Or skin contact with water. He can drink it, but swimming is out of the question. He gets hives, apparently.

Clearly, dating a mermaid is also out of the question, lol.

[PearlieMae]

Jaffa, just tell her to roll them on over to the Salvation Army, or if it'll keep the peace, thank her and do it yourself. It's not worth stressing over. Gotta pick your battles.

While I don't agree with the SA's political stance on some issues, they have the highest rate of using money taken in to helping people ratio. Something like out of ever dollar, 93¢ goes back out.

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Truth, Pearlie. That is an impressive ratio.

[Sherielle]

Well my chances of going to Mermania are now close to nil. My husband got laid off this past Monday. :(

[Ashe]

Aw man Sherielle, that's awful! I hope that something good comes your guys' way and you can make it <3

[Elodea the Mermaid]

Well my chances of going to Mermania are now close to nil. My husband got laid off this past Monday. :(

Oh Sherielle, I'm sorry! I'm sure something good will come along. My man lost his job about a month ago, but he's starting at his new job on Saturday. Hang in there! Bubbles of love to both of you.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Jaffa, just tell her to roll them on over to the Salvation Army, or if it'll keep the peace, thank her and do it yourself. It's not worth stressing over. Gotta pick your battles.

Hmm... Come to think of it, she left me some pj shirts of hers, the previous times because they "were too big" She wore them when she was preggers. Which I've yet to wear because they are "Too big"! Hahaha!
And now that I've discovered weaving again, I think I'll make a potholder bag...
*snickers*

[Echidna]

Well, anything fabric can be put to use- as drapes, dishcloth, cleaning rags... ;)

But I wouldn't accept a "gift" if you don't want/need it, simply because some people will come back at you and try to use it as leverage.
Like; pressing you into accepting something against your resistance, becoming more and more aggressive until you simply say yes to shut them up; and then later always mentioning "all those things I gave you...no gratitude" etc :P

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Well, anything fabric can be put to use- as drapes, dishcloth, cleaning rags... ;)

But I wouldn't accept a "gift" if you don't want/need it, simply because some people will come back at you and try to use it as leverage.
Like; pressing you into accepting something against your resistance, becoming more and more aggressive until you simply say yes to shut them up; and then later always mentioning "all those things I gave you...no gratitude" etc :P
She used to be a nice person to talk to and sometimes hang out with. Now she's exactly like you described. So bossy and bitchy when she doesn't get her way. Or she'll twist things around and use it against me, just like my brother does. I avoid as much hanging around them or going to their place which is just a short walk away. She told her 9years son, "You can't flush tissues in the toilet, you have to throw it in the bin." Then the boy got all uptight when I told him to flush his snotty tissues in the toilet, not just chuck it and have the germs hanging around.

[SeaGlass Siren]

My clown phobia came back. I dreamt a killer clown was on the loose and he made me sit down and watch a horror movie with a killer hairdresser who turned her victims into cha siu (red Chinese BBQ pork) ;-; think chinese sweeney todd.
And then that same woman pulled a samara/sadako on me and tried to kill me.

[PearlieMae]

My clown phobia came back. I dreamt a killer clown was on the loose and he made me sit down and watch a horror movie with a killer hairdresser who turned her victims into cha siu (red Chinese BBQ pork) ;-; think chinese sweeney todd.
And then that same woman pulled a samara/sadako on me and tried to kill me.

Sounds like some serious mother issues ;)

:fallover:

[SeaGlass Siren]

:cry:

[PearlieMae]

Don't cry! :hug:

[Adalira]

So i finally went to the doctor on Monday.
He said i have allergies and prescribed me pills and a spray for.
I am still not happy with the results of that since my nose still gets stuffed so i may go back for the spray i had last year since that one actually helped.
Then i started to look around for houses somewhere and found nothing again.
Then started to write to 3 different building companies.
2 Replied quickly, one was too expensive the other said he would come by on Saturday (yesterday).
He came by yesterday as agreed and the meeting went well, the man was very nice and was helpfull in finding ways to budget more on the house.
After the meeting he wanted to go outside and see where the house would be build and look around. My dad said to him we were pressured for time since we had our first show of the season last night and had to leave at a certain time.
The man asked what kind of shows we did (i had very briefly told him on the phone since he wanted to come in a different time that would not work for any of us because of the shows so he adjusted to that). My dad so that question as an opportunity to start bragging about himself and then about...yes...off course....my brother and his wife!
He started bragging on how great they were, where they go on tour, how suucesfull they are bla bla bla while my hubby and i and my mom were standing there waiting to go outside since we were still pressured for time!
I was so upset....why bring up my brother and his wife again? The man was not even asking about that! He was only asking about the show we were doing that night.
Anyway after he left i had to hurry to get everything done before leaving for the show.
I quickly turned my music on in the car because i could not listen to more bragging done by my brother who was in the car with us, or the bragging of my dad.
At the show things went ok untill my dad decided to make a remark that was hurtful to me and was meant to be so as well.
I got upset, but held it in.
I talked to my hubby through fb since my hubby was home and all i got from him was to let it go, that i needed to stop letting things get to me and simply be happy with the live i have.
He simply does not get it and i told him i preferred not talking to him about it anymore.
We talked later on the phone and i told my hubby i really prefer not living at my parents.
It seems that when my hubby and i are alone with my parents we all seem to get along perfectly fine.
But as soon as other people are there, my parents change and only talk about my brother and his wife and sort of forget about us.
The other thing is that they will not stop treating me like a child!
The guy yesterday at the meeting asked when the house had to be done for us to move in to and my parents said they are not sure yet.
Either decembre 1st or decembre 31st.
I mean...that is a big difference in time and i have asked them many times now to please ask the realtor what the exact date is so we can plan accordingly.
Yesterday i asked if it was ok if i called the realtor and asked so we can plan accordingly and the answer was :" No way, we do NOT want you to talk to him. You can NOT call him, are we clear?!"
Needless to say i felt embarrassed in fron of the guy since they talked to me like a child.
i really don't get what the big deal is, why can i not call and ask what the exact planning is?
After that, the bragging about my brother and the things that happened at the show i was done.
One of the things happening at the show was my dad again saying how great my brother sang at his party.
That my dad's pop group from back in the day wants to start performing and touring again but since the lead singer can't come he wants my brother to be the lead singer.
So my brother did it....singing was the one thing i got just a little bit of attention with, the last bit of attention that i got in stead of him and he took that now as well.
I also told my parents last week that since i have Meniere disease my hearing has gotten worse and worse.
When there is a lot of noise going on i can't follow conversations anymore.
I told them that at the last show in August i believe it was, when i was talking to the mother of our collegue, my brother started to play guitar and sang loudly i could not follow the conversation anymore and that it is painful for me that i can't follow it anymore.
I really opened up to them about it.
I was hoping they would try to keep the guitar playing and singing down a bit in the dressing room for me.
But last night i talked to my hubby on the phone and when i wanted to hang up and go back in they were singing and playing guitar and being so loud in there that i could not go back in.
I knew i would be just sitting there, feeling awkward.
So i stayed on the phone with my hubby instead.
I told him all i wanted to do was tell my family;" I quit, this was my last show. My brother can take over my songs in the show since he is such a great singer."
And then also tell them i am moving away, not living there.
But my hubby said there are no other options for us. We can not afford anything else.
On the drive home last night from the show i sat in the back of the van listening to music with tears in my eyes.
When i saw my reflection in the window from the street lamp i got a shock.
I looked like a 90 year old woman with a hunch back, in stead of sitting up straight i sat there like i had taken a beating.
I was hoping to do some crafting today but i am so extremely tired...i had a minor Meniere attack earlier with dizzyness but feel one coming up again so i will have to lay down for a while and maybe sleep a bit.
To top it all off.....my hubby needs to renew is permit to stay in Holland.
Immigration told us 3 years ago that it had to be renewed in Septembre of this year and that we would be getting a letter from them 3 months prior with all the info of what needed to be filled out.
We never got that letter.
They told us it was our responsibility to make sure we got the letter.
I called in June, i called in July and i called in August and every single time i called i got the same answer:' the letter has not been send out yet."
The last time in August the woman told me i did not need the letter i could print out a certain form and fill that out.
She even told me which form exactly and we went through the form together.
In Septembre we got all the paperwork ready, also the papers from the book keepster and i called the immigration one more time to make sure we had everything....only to find out the woman gave us the wrong forms!!!
So we had to fill out other forms and the book keepster had to make new paperwork as well asap.
I called again and asked if it really was correct this time and he said:" Yes, you have everything you need right now."
We sent it in and got a letter yesterday stating we did not give all the information they wanted and they need other forms as well.....are you freaking kidding me?
From what i read they need 2 more forms (book keepster is working on one of them now, i have to print out the other) and then they will decide.
If they decide not to renew is permit, so deny him, we have to give a buckload of other information such as: Complete market analysis of our business to show what purpose our business serves, a complete business plan, reviews and referrences from customers and business partners, a bunch of tax papers, more papers from the book keepster and about 10 more points of things.
It is absolutly insane! I mean..the business is my business, started the business. My hubby came in as a co owner.
Why is a business that is still 50% mine, a woman from Holland, going to be looked into like that?
I have been writing a letter for the politicians and political parties in Holland which i will be sendind out next week.
Immigrants are coming in to Holland ten thousands at a time, they get a permit for 3 or 5 years for free! no questions asked. They get food and housing for free no questions asked, 99% don't learn Dutch and are not part of society. They are fighing amongst each other, discriminating against women in Holland etc.
My hubby came here wanting to work here and live with me, build a live with me.
We had to pay €600!!! for his first permit which only lasted 3 years and now had to pay €384 for the to look if he can stay another 3 to 5 years.
Our business is doing well and has grown a lot since he came here, he is learning Dutch and becoming an active member of society, obeying the laws and rules doing everything according to the rules and he will have to proof himself every 3 to 5 years to make sre he is good enough to live here? Seriously?
I am so done with everything right now....ugh....:mad:

[Adalira]

I just got a message from a moderator that mers have been complaining about me since they feel i am offensive to immigrants and that i need to edit y post.
I told the moderator i will not edit my post since all i did was tell the truth.
There is nothing untruthfull about my post.
And i would hope that if any mer has a problem with what i wrote they would come to me directly and ask or talk to me about it
I a am adult and would have liked to talk to that mer in an adult manner.
I told the moderator he can ban me from mernetwork if that's what they want to do, but i will not be told not to tell the truth about what is going on in Holland and how absolutly stupid the rules are.
And guess what? Politicians feel the same as me and most of Holland because they are planning to change the rules for immigrants and are working on it as we speak because even they feel that it is absurd.
If anyone has proof of me not speaking the truth or anyone wants to say something about it, please do.
I am always open for a discussion or hearing an other side.
And if i do get banned then i want to thank the mers i have been talking with lately for their friendship, kindness and advice and wish you all the best :hug:

[AniaR]

To be honest you can't confuse your experience and opinions with facts. Back up what you say with a credible source and you can then call it at fact.

Sent from my MotoG3 using Tapatalk

[Adalira]

I will do that Aniar, but I will not post it in here. You will receive it all in a private message. It may be a lot but I feel you need all the info you can get to see that I am speaking the truth. I not confusing things, it saddens me to see you make so many assumptions about thing you clearly know nothing about even assumptions about me when you and I have never had a conversation together. But after the info I will send you I hope you understand what I am telling is what is in fact going on in the Netherlands. I am in the van still but will stay up extra late this night to give you what you are asking for.

[AniaR]

Omg please just stop. I don't want a PM. I didn't report your posts. Don't take it so personally. It is a general way to do things. Don't accuse me of all this crap. If you don't want people getting upset, back it up and they won't. Cuts down on all the drama. Don't come in here and wine about a mod and make some big announcement. Keep THAT to pm. I really don't care, I am explaining to you why people are so bothered by your posts. Deal with it or don't.

Sent from my MotoG3 using Tapatalk

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Actually, complaints were happening in the drama bubble thread, mostly against Echidna's rape comments.

Look. Just because people aren't from your country doesn't mean that they're bad people. Your husband is proof of this, he's just a more affluent example.
Among these people are rapists, yes, there are rapists amongst every population, including the normal Dutch population of Holland. Look at the statistics. I doubt you'll find a significant increase in violent crimes.

These people are fleeing a war, Adalira. They have had no notice, of course they haven't started learning Dutch. They've had no time and no money.

And no. I did not report you. Still. You're going through a rough time yourself right now and you aren't being displaced by a war. Show a little compassion.

[Adalira]

Oh my,

I already explained that Sabrina.
I want the refugees to be helped but there are other ways then jamming then into Holland and Germany.
i have all the compassion in the world for these people. I wrote that all in the Drama thread.
I never said that people who are not from our country are bad people, why would you put words in my mouth like that? Why insinuate that i am discriminating?
i do not think you want me to give the statistics because they will shock you, trust me.
If you want them still, let me know and you will get them from me in a pm.
I was not talking about the people just coming here not knowing Dutch.
It is the people who have lived here for over 5 years and got a home and get an income from the government.
One requirement is to learn Dutch but a lot of them simply refuse and nothing is done against it.
The rotten apples are the ones i have no compassion for.
I even mentioned the radio announcement tonight where they wanted to place an extra 700 people into a village and the people from the village made a road block.
Why? Because there are only 150 Dutch people living in the village and already 700 refugees. They did not want 700 more.
I do not care what color skin people are.
If these were white people i would respond the exact same way.
I can see that the people from the USA are the once who are telling us to show more compassion, not to discriminate and giving us the "it's no so bad" talk when they know absolutly nothing about what is going on here. How Holland as well as Germany are on the edge of citizens starting their own war against what is happening.

The only reason i posted publically about the mod is that i honestly thought i was being banned and did not think i had time to write to everyone personally and did it through a general message.
What is wrong with that?
I don't care who reported me, i was not asking who did since i don't care.
All i hope is that next time people direct me personally in stead of having a mod speak up for them.
We are all adults here.

[AniaR]

Yeah but given your replies since people have spoken up, hell of a lot less dramatic having a mod handle it.

Sent from my MotoG3 using Tapatalk

[Sabrina the Selkie]

If you read further back in the bubble thread we discussed the mod alert thing. It's just a way to avoid public call out and further drama. Instead of starting a fight, just report comments you find offensive. That is a very adult thing to do.

And I do get your concerns about immigration policy and I'm sure you're not intentionally racist. You seem to be a very sweet person. But you do make subtle insinuations (I did read the drama bubble thread and post there too) that may just be translations errs, like the fugitives-refugees mishap, but some of it does seem to be ingrained in your speech pattern.

[Sabrina the Selkie]

In my liberal suburb, everyone decries racists and fight for equality; the same white women who talks the equality talk pulls her bag and her small children to the other side of her body when she passes some of my POC friends in the street. She would never even consider herself racist, though. It's an ingrained behavior, and they can be hard to get rid of.

[Adalira]

Those must be translation errors and like i said i do not see color.
A refugee can just as well be white, gay, lesbian or any color of the rainbow. I do not care.
All i care about is everyone being treated equally and obeying by the law that we have here.
I can not even believe all of this got so blown out of proportion into the drama that it is simply by me stating facts that we live with everyday and that can be found everywhere on the internet and saying that it is frustrating to me how things are handled.
All of a sudden i am being questioned wether or not i am a racist or discriminate when that has nothing to do with the matter.
Race nor discrimination are of a fact here.
It is about people obeying the law and being treated equal and not jamming more people into an already very full country.
They announced tonight that Dutch people who are on a waiting list for a rental house will have to wait several years more since the refugees get first dibs on those soon when they will be offered houses.
Is that fair?

How is asking to be adressed to personally, starting a fight?
I don't get that.
Talking to each other is the adult way in my opinion but that may be a difference in upbringing or even culture. I would not know what it is.

[malinghi]

This is a reminder for everyone to be respectful. While you're welcome to share your opinion, please consider whether it could potentially be considered a violation of the rules. If it might be, I encourage you to simply keep it to yourself. This is a formal warning.

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Yes, sorry, I get passionate and loud!
*sweatdrop*
I'll admit I probably got too heated.

[AniaR]

I think you're fine Sabrina ;)

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Well, thank you! :)

[AniaR]

I find the people quick to apologize are usually the ones who almost never have reason to :p

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Lol. Not really surprised by that. But I'm ridiculously assertive in my regular life, as well as having a ridiculous dead pan, so I have trouble telling when I cross a line. A few of my friendships have thusly suffered.
But I'm glad I wasn't ridiculous here!

[Adalira]

Things got way out of hand yesterday simply because mers made assumptions and generalisations without asking the questions.
I decided to talk to several mers personally like momo and was happy to hear she did not see anything wrong with my posts:
Don't worry, your post was not the post I was referring to, I saw nothing wrong with your post besides sincere concern for your safety.

Other mers emailed me as well to let me know they also so nothing wrong with what i posted and i am thankful they were willing to look more closely at what really was said.
I am not angry at you Sabrina, not at all but i am dissapointed you jumped to conclusions very fast about me not being compassionate enough in your eyes and you put words in my mouth that i did not appreciate such as :
Just because people aren't from your country doesn't mean that they're bad people.
I really wish you would have actually talked to me and asked me some questions before jumping to conslusions and accusing me of things and i hope in the future you will do so.Raina i am also not angry at you, you were however very hurtful in your comments, i will pm you to make sure no more drama comes from it.
Lets all make a promise that we ask questions first and we open minded towards others to make sure we keep the outbursts of drama to a minimum.
I want all mers to know that they can always pm me and ask me questions about anything.
I am always open for a discussion, a talk or anything else.
Sabrina if you would like to talk more or say something lets pm about it ok?
The last thing i want is to be seen as unapproachable or anything else bad.

[Merman Arion]

I just saw new naked pictures of Justin Bieber....... :doh: :doh: :doh:

My reaction :

http://i640.photobucket.com/albums/uu125/qjacker/vrt11fjpg.gif

[Aysun_the_Mermaid]

D: ^

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

[SeaGlass Siren]

^ Pretty much D:

[Merman Arion]

D: ^

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk


^ Pretty much D:

33326

[Mermaid Wesley]

Why does that boy keep taking nudes, man.... I don't wanna see that lol


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[SeaGlass Siren]

What I wanna know is who keeps hacking his phone and sharing them. :| and if no one hacked his phone and he shares them... Pourquoi....?

[Mermaid Wesley]

Same tbh


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Merman Arion]

What I wanna know is who keeps hacking his phone and sharing them. :| and if no one hacked his phone and he shares them... Pourquoi....?

Actually, a paparazzi took the pictures while he was wandering naked outside of his property during his trip in Bora-Bora...

http://replygif.net/i/894.gif

[Mermaid Wesley]

Well. That's uncool of this paps but when have they respected privacy


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[SeaGlass Siren]

Ugh paparazzi should just die already.

[SeaGlass Siren]

If they followed US around they'd be in jail for stalking. But if it's famous people "oh my god gossip"

[Starfrit]

A lot of paparazzi use these weird mental gymnastics to justify doing this stuff, claiming that celebrities are ~*part of the public domain*~ or whatever. That was one of the biggest excuses I saw during that Kate Middleton topless pic scandal from a few years ago (the pic was take when a ridiculously high-tech zoom lense from literally miles away, through a balcony door or something??) As if celebrities aren't even real people.

It's creepy as hell, dude.

Also, mostly I'm just baffled because as a Canadian, who even cares about Justin Bieber anymore?

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Thst must've been painful!

[MermaidBrynley]

I wanna go to MerMania SOOOO bad :cry:stupid Alaska...stupid money...stupid plane tickets...stupid husbands job (his job, not him)...ugh I am so over living so far away from everything :cry::thumbdown:

[Adalira]

I just saw new naked pictures of Justin Bieber....... :doh: :doh: :doh:

My reaction :

http://i640.photobucket.com/albums/uu125/qjacker/vrt11fjpg.gif

LOL, i love love love friends so this gif is absolutly fabulous and so fitting to what you wrote
That made my day, thank you! :D


A lot of paparazzi use these weird mental gymnastics to justify doing this stuff, claiming that celebrities are ~*part of the public domain*~ or whatever. That was one of the biggest excuses I saw during that Kate Middleton topless pic scandal from a few years ago (the pic was take when a ridiculously high-tech zoom lense from literally miles away, through a balcony door or something??) As if celebrities aren't even real people.

It's creepy as hell, dude.

Also, mostly I'm just baffled because as a Canadian, who even cares about Justin Bieber anymore?

I can see it is the same everywhere in the world. The paparazzi are acting the exact same way here which is so sad.
They claim that when you are famous you have to pay the price of paparazzi. Such a load of you know what if you ask me.
Everyone deserves their privacy, no matter what job they have.
A fun prank for youtube could be regular people taking photos and stalking the paparazzi for weeks and weeks. Give them a taste of their own medicine.
Please please please let there be guys out there working on a prank like that! :jester:

[Ashe]

A fun prank for youtube could be regular people taking photos and stalking the paparazzi for weeks and weeks. Give them a taste of their own medicine.
Please please please let there be guys out there working on a prank like that! :jester:
Count me in :lol:

[Mermaid Momo]

There was a shooting on my university campus this morning and people' response? "This happened because they took god out o schools, guns have nothing to do with it!"


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Madison MerFaerie]

I'm really glad to hear that you're safe, Momo!

[Merman Arion]

There was a shooting on my university campus this morning and people' response? "This happened because they took god out o schools, guns have nothing to do with it!"

OMG!! Are you okay?! :(

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Momo! Good to know that you're okay.
Amd I've seen those taking God out of schools things. That's just nuts.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Two things.
1: Holy fucking shit are you ok??
2: I hate it when people bring religion into something that doesnt even involve it. Blame the moron shooting dont blame thr schools. If it was a catholic school the same exact thing wouldve happened.

[Dancing Fish]

OMG, Momo, what a terrible thing to happen! I'm glad you're safe. And of course there are also the folks who will say the solution is to arm all the professors and students. Speaking as a professor...no freaking way am I going to carry a gun. You know why? It's not even that I'm anti-gun. (1) I know how I react to the unexpected. I freeze. My brain utterly stops working. Unless I go through combat training, I'll be more of a danger in that situation than a help, and (2) COMBAT TRAINING is not in my job description! I was hired to teach, not be a soldier.
The thought of having armed students in my classroom also terrifies me. If we as a nation don't think 18-20 year olds are adults when it comes to drinking alcohol, do we really think they're adult enough to make awesome decisions under gunfire?!! (ETA: I actually do consider 18 year olds adults in most respects...not my point here). Most adults aren't adult enough to make awesome decisions under gunfire. Most of us can't even think straight when a room full of people are just staring at us. :)

[Adalira]

Oh my god, i am sorry to hear this Momo, i hope you are ok!
Religion has nothing to do with a shooting, the idiot that did the shooting needs to be locked up and the key needs to be conveniently "misplaced" never to be found.

[Mermaid Mystery]

Oh my god I'm so glad you're safe! now that I'm on a college campus our security has upped and I'm nervous. Just this morning my mom warned me about shootings! I'm so sorry that people are being stupid about this, I'm just glad you're safe!

[Aysun_the_Mermaid]

My boss decided that I was going to drive him to the airport, but didn't tell me.

Then he looked at me like I was an idiot when I asked him when I was suppose to take him (after I found out casually, in conversation)

I don't particularly care for driving (though I do it a lot for my job)
And I really don't like driving in high traffic areas like, I don't know, airports?

Just... seriously.
Unless you are closely related to me or I am hopelessly in love with you, do not ask me (or tell me or expect me) to take you to the airport.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

[PearlieMae]

My boss decided that I was going to drive him to the airport, but didn't tell me.

Then he looked at me like I was an idiot when I asked him when I was suppose to take him (after I found out casually, in conversation)

I don't particularly care for driving (though I do it a lot for my job)
And I really don't like driving in high traffic areas like, I don't know, airports?

Just... seriously.
Unless you are closely related to me or I am hopelessly in love with you, do not ask me (or tell me or expect me) to take you to the airport.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

How about "Why the F*** didn't you ASK ME if I would take you to the airport?"

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Like, right?!
Pearlie has the right idea there.

[Aysun_the_Mermaid]

It is extra funny when he bitches about his boss doing nearly the same thing. I tell him it must suck when your boss expects non work related things from you. He just does not see it.

I am getting paid, but it is over an hour both ways and more the principle of the matter...

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

[SeaMansa]

I was skimming innocently through my email today.... Who am I kidding? I was purposefully looking through past emails from like, 5 or 6 years ago and stumbled upon old emails from my ex.
I found there was a powerpoint she'd made about our relationship using our song and I guess pictures of us and all kinds of lovey dovey crap. But, for some reason, it was password protected and I have neve been able to figure out the password and I guess I just never saw it even after all these years. So I guess after we broke up I just didn't care anymore. Well....idk why but.... I'm going to look at it now.... >_> I already downloaded a program to hack the password and I...I...don't even know how to feel knowing in an hour or two I will have the password. I really don't want to go down this road again but I am forcing myself down it. Don't get me wrong, I'm over her and barely even talk to her, but still. She was "the first" so I guess its just a huge emotional tug I cant resist falling into again right now.
So I'm probably going to feeling all sad for the rest of the week. Screw my darned emotions. Screw em to the pits of hades T____T

[SeaGlass Siren]

You know what they say. People never forget their first love.

[Mermaid Alea]

I was skimming innocently through my email today.... Who am I kidding? I was purposefully looking through past emails from like, 5 or 6 years ago and stumbled upon old emails from my ex.
I found there was a powerpoint she'd made about our relationship using our song and I guess pictures of us and all kinds of lovey dovey crap. But, for some reason, it was password protected and I have neve been able to figure out the password and I guess I just never saw it even after all these years. So I guess after we broke up I just didn't care anymore. Well....idk why but.... I'm going to look at it now.... >_> I already downloaded a program to hack the password and I...I...don't even know how to feel knowing in an hour or two I will have the password. I really don't want to go down this road again but I am forcing myself down it. Don't get me wrong, I'm over her and barely even talk to her, but still. She was "the first" so I guess its just a huge emotional tug I cant resist falling into again right now.
So I'm probably going to feeling all sad for the rest of the week. Screw my darned emotions. Screw em to the pits of hades T____T

Aww :( I make my boyfriend videos like that for our anniversaries. Are you sure you should look at it? I mean I know you are curious but...

[SeaMansa]

the password program thing was taking too long (5 hours to figure out a password....? I thought this was the future!) but I know it will work. So i'll restart it again and let it run while I sleep so when I awaken, I can have the password.
Am I sure I wish to see it? I don't know... but....I cant just not see it.... I know its going to filled with I loves you's and I want to be with u forever's, all that jazz, but i gots to see what it has inside. It's like a car crash. you know when u look you aren't going to see anything good...but you just gotta look.

[Lotus the Mermaid]

That's awful, Mono!!! Thank God you're okay. These shootings are really getting me scared to go to school each week. I can't imagine what you must be feeling.

I agree with SeaGlass. It's not the time for political agendas! I don't even feel the President should have addressed gun laws the same day as the last big shooting! It doesn't seem appropriate. At least wait a few days for the families of victims to mourn, people. Ugh, I'm just so sorry. Let me know if you ever need to talk, hon!! :< :hug:

[Sabrina the Selkie]

^ ^ ^
What Lotus said, Momo!

[shimmygoddess]

When people won't own up to when they were wrong or offer a sincere apology. People need to check their facts before accusing people of stuff and then when they realize they were wrong, own up to it and apologize...ugh....Some people think they are 'too popular' for sincere apologies I guess!!!!

[Merman_Shawn]

Can someone please explain to me why people have been posting listings for tails without photos?! :confused:
If someone is going to spend several hundred to several thousand on a tail, why wouldn't they want to see it first? Think it through people!
I get that sometimes you aren't near a computer with the photos. If that's the case, then why wouldn't you just wait until you get home?
When you do this, it doesn't look professional, it looks impulsive.
I can imagine what the tail is going to look like until the cows come home, but I won't even consider buying it without seeing it. If you want to sell your tail, then make a proper listing!

[Mermaid Mystery]

I just made a report to animal control.
I tried to catch these pups that were running around in traffic but they ran away :(

[Princess Pearl]

I film and edit on my iPad. I had to delete several apps just so that I have enough memory to render my most recent video, and the stupid thing still won't upload. I need a better camera >:(

[Mermaid Kelda]

This isn't even really a bitch, more of a... sad.
My boyfriend of nearly four years broke up with me tonight.
He has fallen out of love with me. There's nothing either of us can do about that. I'm sad, but we'll still be friends.

I just needed to tell someone about it. It's 1 am and I'm not used to sleeping alone.

[Merman Arion]

This isn't even really a bitch, more of a... sad.
My boyfriend of nearly four years broke up with me tonight.
He has fallen out of love with me. There's nothing either of us can do about that. I'm sad, but we'll still be friends.

I just needed to tell someone about it. It's 1 am and I'm not used to sleeping alone.

I'm so sorry to hear this, Kelda :(
I wish I could be there for you and give you a hug. I had a similar situation with my ex, I can relate to what you're feeling. We stayed friends as well and it sucked but it was better this way. I hope you will get through this. The first week is always tough.

[Sabrina the Selkie]

Oh, Kelda. I'm so sorry.

[Keiris]

Kelda, I am very sorry to hear this. Sending you all kinds of Mer-hugs and support.

[Talia]

I am so sorry Kelda. Sending comforting thoughts your way.

[Celaeno]

I'm sorry, Kelda. Breakups are always hard, even when there's not anger or animosity. <3

[Lotus the Mermaid]

This isn't even really a bitch, more of a... sad.
My boyfriend of nearly four years broke up with me tonight.
He has fallen out of love with me. There's nothing either of us can do about that. I'm sad, but we'll still be friends.

I just needed to tell someone about it. It's 1 am and I'm not used to sleeping alone.
I'm so sorry... if you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to message me. You can add me on FB. Praying for your heart to heal and for you to be comforted by those around you during this difficult transition. :< :hug:

[PearlieMae]

That's awful, Mono!!! Thank God you're okay. These shootings are really getting me scared to go to school each week. I can't imagine what you must be feeling.

I agree with SeaGlass. It's not the time for political agendas! I don't even feel the President should have addressed gun laws the same day as the last big shooting! It doesn't seem appropriate. At least wait a few days for the families of victims to mourn, people. Ugh, I'm just so sorry. Let me know if you ever need to talk, hon!! :< :hug:

if he waited for a gap in shootings, he'd never get a chance to speak.

[Ashe]

When I look at the adults that precede my generation, all I see I work, stress, and more work. I'm terrified that is what I will succumb to because it has already begun and I'm only in high school.

[Madison MerFaerie]

if he waited for a gap in shootings, he'd never get a chance to speak.

I so agree Pearlie. I read something somewhere that mass shootings are occurring at a rate of about every 8 days. Sorry I don't have the exact source to back that up.

So sad.

[Mermaid Kelda]

Thank you all for your kind words<3 it means a lot to me that I have people here to support me, even in a relatively small matter like a break up. You're all so great :)

[Lotus the Mermaid]

if he waited for a gap in shootings, he'd never get a chance to speak.

I know, it's sad, but the same day? That seems inapproprate to me. I don't like politics. :1

[Lotus the Mermaid]

Thank you all for your kind words<3 it means a lot to me that I have people here to support me, even in a relatively small matter like a break up. You're all so great :)

Definitely!! You are not alone! :> <3

[Mermaid Wesley]

Actually we are averaging almost one mass shooting a day this year. the national news only covers the big ones.
http://www.shootingtracker.com/

[Lotus the Mermaid]

Actually we are averaging almost one mass shooting a day this year. the national news only covers the big ones.
http://www.shootingtracker.com/

I heard that, but the one he was addressing had just happened that morning. And he didn't mention any of the lesser covered shootings, just the ones that got a lot of media coverage. So he had some time. I just hope those families are doing well.

Campuses in Texas are now operating under a new law which permits those with CHLs to carry guns because of all the shootings. If it took more time to receive a gun, that would feel a bit safer. I agree that laws need to change. But addressing a tragedy to push that point is in poor taste to me. Anyway, I feel I should probably get some for of protection. I may get a CHL myself one day. I never would have said that a year ago. These are crazy times. :<

[Keiris]

Someone fired about 10 shots into an event I was hired to do Sat night. Zombiecon in Ft.Myers. Five injured and one killed. I don't know how they can identify anyone as there were close to 18,000 people and everyone in costume.

[Mermaid Alea]

I saw that on the news I am glad you are safe Keiris. It is so sad that someone died. :( I really hope they can find the shooter.

[Naufra]

So I'm a cashier in a grocery store. I was ringing out this one customer today who was manhandling her young son because she didn't like his behavior. I didn't think he was being all that bad, he was just bored and antsy, but I didn't say anything about it. When I was about halfway done ringing her order, she turned to me and said, out of nowhere, "You're not very smart, are you?"

"Excuse you?" I replied.

"You couldn't possibly be smart, you're a grown-up and you're just a check-out girl."

"It's true, I am a cashier, and this job is paying for my doctorate in classical English literature."

I wasn't even harsh or angry in my reply, just matter-of-fact, but she looked like she wanted to cry and didn't say another word for the rest of the transaction. For the record, I'm not going for a doctorate in anything, I'm just completing a Pharmacy Technician program at the local community college, but damn it felt good to shut her up. What gives her the right to make those kinds of assumptions about people? She's clearly frustrated with her own life, but taking it out on total strangers? As if the way she was treating her kid wasn't bad enough! I am damned sick of people making assumptions about my intelligence based on my job. I work for a good company and I'm working my way through college so I don't have to take out student loans, what's wrong with that?

[Lotus the Mermaid]

Someone fired about 10 shots into an event I was hired to do Sat night. Zombiecon in Ft.Myers. Five injured and one killed. I don't know how they can identify anyone as there were close to 18,000 people and everyone in costume.

That's horrible!!! I'm so glad you're okay! D:

[Keiris]

That's horrible!!! I'm so glad you're okay! D:
Thanks Lotus and Alea. I just don't understand what is happening with people lately!

Naufra, I am sorry to hear that woman was such a bitch. You have more self control than I and I commend you on your come-back to her. She is such a pea-brain. Anyone can make money. It just takes work, patience and some perseverance. She had to feel like a moron.

[Naufra]

Thanks, Keiris. I'm glad you weren't hurt at your event, I just read through the rest of the new posts on the thread! You and Momo had some close calls in the past week, I'm glad neither of you were harmed.

[Mermaid Mystery]

there's a cricket in my lizard's cage that has not stopped chirping for the past 4 days. normally I remove them if she doesn't eat it. the problem? I can't find it. It's been four days. she can't find it either, and I think it's bothering her more than it is me. I can't stand it anymore.

[Mermaid Mystery]

turns out it was four crickets. how did we not catch that??? well she's shedding so I guess that's why she didn't eat them. finally I can sleep in peace.

[mersheep]

Yesterday a pit bull from the building next door to the hall where I work on pipe organs, Killed the cat that lives on the porch. I really liked that cat. It's name was Kitty-Boy. It would greet me when I came in. Sleep under my car during the day. We keep food out for the neighboring cats.

The guy next door must be hiding something. The place is a junk yard, with yellow tagged nearly abandoned cars and junk all over. The guy is a recluse. Sneaks in and out of the house in the back. The police or the city will not do anything. There are young children in the neighborhood. What if one of the children was attacked? Why is it that something bad has to happen before anything gets done?

We were having a collectors meeting, so there were several witnesses to the incident. I was inside so did not see it. One of the witnesses was a lawyer, He said it could take up to 3 years for anything to be done through the courts (Suing the city for not enforcing it's own laws.) And that would just make the people who run the city mad.

This is the second cat that was witnessed being killed. Several others simply disappeared. The guy always seems to get the dog back from animal control.

There is another cat, which lives inside the hall and likes to use my laptop to post cat videos I fear for her now
http://www.delectra.com/photos/midightRVO.jpg

[Celaeno]

Maintaining respectful silence about gun violence only ensures that there will be more grieving families. The US has the highest instance of gun deaths among the G7 nations, and we have to address it. Politics shape the world we live in, and I for one do not want to live in a world where everyone feels like they have to carry to feel safe. Since moving to England, I'm realizing how many things we've come to accept as the price of "freedom" in the US. When a woman's uterus is more regulated than firearms, there is something wrong. It's not about freedom any more. Politics may be distasteful, but it is the responsibility of citizens to engage with the political machine and hold it accountable. Radical change rarely comes politely.

[Lotus the Mermaid]

Maintaining respectful silence about gun violence only ensures that there will be more grieving families. The US has the highest instance of gun deaths among the G7 nations, and we have to address it. Politics shape the world we live in, and I for one do not want to live in a world where everyone feels like they have to carry to feel safe. Since moving to England, I'm realizing how many things we've come to accept as the price of "freedom" in the US. When a woman's uterus is more regulated than firearms, there is something wrong. It's not about freedom any more. Politics may be distasteful, but it is the responsibility of citizens to engage with the political machine and hold it accountable. Radical change rarely comes politely.
The thing is, when the President addresses it, is he actually doing anything about it or just talking about doing something involving regulation? I would have preferred his response be to sit down with legislators or state representatives and come up with a solution than stand up and wag his finger at Americans for not doing it for him. Plus, in his doing that, he sent gun sales surging upward. Every time the politicians or media talk about it, the problem gets worse. Wouldn't action be better? I realize he's held talks about it, but why not that day instead of using the tragedy as a megaphone for his intent?

I must have said something rather controversial. I didn't mean for my post to start a debate. :<

[mersheep]

Maintaining respectful silence about gun violence only ensures that there will be more grieving families.

I left a part of the story about the cat that was killed Saturday. It might send the wrong message, But perhaps I will include in now. After the cat was killed and witnessed by people that include the lady (ex marine) who works at the local animal shelter and feeds and takes care of the stray cats. Gun violence was threatened. One of the other members who was witnessing the altercation even reached for a weapon in the glove compartment.

The problem is much deeper than just guns. Keeping vicious lethal dogs that can kill is no different than keeping guns. The person who lives in reclusive compulsive hording squalor probably does need medical help.

We need to stop treating people like product, that buys things and are only as good as their perceived worth. The real problem is the lack of long term mental health care. Because of the constant wars we are really good at treating trauma injuries. Due to the high body counts of the 18th and 19th centuries. The book Frankenstein is mostly true. There are a lot of people who live with artificial hearts. Cadavers are used to treat traumatic chronic joint decay.

We still do not treat the mind. The mind is a scary place. It is even more scary that one person Sigmund Freud had undue influence. Although the alternative he replaced Phrenology (mapping the bumps on the skull to predict behavior, is even worse.)
Not so sure about Joung. Skinner and the other researchers of the 20th century are really disturbing (I am not a pigeon.) Then there was electroshock therapy. (well that worked eal well in this weeks Dr Who episode.)

I could go on, but I do not have the answers. There are a lot of good things happening too. I have a great project to work on. There is a lot to look forward to on my own personal timeline. Yet I feel for others, and that sometimes makes me feel a bit empathic. I guess that is why we have social networking, so we can share our feelings with others.

Let me send lots of mermaid love and hugs, to those who really need it.

[Mermaid Mystery]

I would just like to say that I hope you do not blame all pitbulls for this dog's actions. it's not the breed that's the problem, it's the dog.

[SeaGlass Siren]

So I'm kinda glad I live just across the border where there is gun regulation. Oh Canada.
Reading this entire thing is just... Yikes.

[mersheep]

I would just like to say that I hope you do not blame all pitbulls for this dog's actions.

Blaming the breed is like blaming the gun. There are strong parallels here. Actually I prefer in a way to have a dog. Dogs can be quite loyal and part of the family. They can also be quite territorial and defensive.

Cats are independent creatures. They just look cute.

As for the dog's owner, It is clear that person needs help. We live in a society that has due process, so it can take years to resolve situations through the collective government institutions. The owner has probably only been told he is worth what he possesses. So like a member of a cargo cult, he possesses items which others see as garbage. We rush to judgment.

Otherwise we are back to pigeonholing through stereotypes, appearance and things like the now discredited science of phrenology.

[RastaMer]

Lotus, it's obvious you don't follow politics closely, so it's probably best to just stop talking about things you don't know much about. "Using a tragedy as a megaphone"? Are you high?

Wow, not cool.

[Celaeno]

The president isn't an emperor or king, he doesn't have as much power as people think he does. That's why we as citizens need to engage with our local politics. It's much more effective to change policies and laws by getting responsible local politicians into office than expect the POTUS to make sweeping changes. Making a public address about the issue and meeting with legislators over it aren't mutually exclusive, and I really think a public address is needed. When reasonable people start thinking that carrying a weapon for personal protection is the answer to rampant gun violence, the system is broken. As with so many things in our nation's history, it's going to take loud and constant dissent to change things.

[Celaeno]

I'll add that the number of news stories about citizens who carry opening fire on shoplifters and the like is on the rise, and that kind of vigilantism really scares me. In one instance of a man trying to thwart a carjacking, he shot the owner of the vehicle instead of the thief. A man who just got his concealed carry license shot himself in the leg at a movie theater a few days ago and caused mass panic. Guns need to be regulated at least as much as cars, you should have to demonstrate knowledge and proficiency. There are so many untrained people with deadly weapons who fancy themselves heroes-in-waiting and it's terrifying.

[Talia]

The president isn't an emperor or king, he doesn't have as much power as people think he does.

If I may point out, a king (at least the king of Spain) has no weight in the government either. We have a saying that goes "The king reigns, but he does not govern". He cannot make executive decisions regarding anything. That's why we elect democratically a President that represents a party - just like in the US.

[PearlieMae]

Lotus, I am so sorry. I retract everything I said. I was having a very difficult morning and I am in no condition to comment on anything. I would delete my post, but I've been quoted, so it's not like I could eliminate my very rash comment altogether.

Again, Lotus, you are nothing if not the sweetest person in the world, and I was an asshole for saying that in the first place.

I hope you can forgive me.

EDIT: I did delete my unbelievably inappropriate post, Lotus. I am truly sorry.

[Ashe]

Guys, come on. You're fighting over politics on a mermaid forum. Can we chill a little before MerNetwork's reputation turns to shit and scare all of the new members again?

[Merman Dan]

I realize he's held talks about it, but why not that day instead of using the tragedy as a megaphone for his intent?

I rather agree with this. Lets address the shooter, not the gun. If there were no guns, criminals would just use knives instead. If you take firearms away from law-abiding citizens then the only people who will own them will be criminals.

[RastaMer]

Guys, come on. You're fighting over politics on a mermaid forum. Can we chill a little before MerNetwork's reputation turns to shit and scare all of the new members again?

I don't consider this fighting until it gets personal. Otherwise I think political talk is very interesting and good to see among all communities. It is a source of critical thinking about how our society works, which encourages social progression. I believe that should never be discouraged in any part of our world.

[Ashe]

I hadn't seen the apology, but it did get personal between two members. I would just hate to see the forum blow up about something not even related to the community.

[AniaR]

*laughs manically from gun controlled Canada*

Sent from my MotoG3 using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Mystery]

LMAO

[Starfrit]

*laughs manically from gun controlled Canada*

Sent from my MotoG3 using Tapatalk

https://media4.giphy.com/media/Pldo6KZZ7bUe4/giphy.gif

[Merman Dan]

*laughs manically from gun controlled Canada*

I used to hate guns. My grandfather was the penultimate "great white hunter". If it breathed air, he would shoot it and throw it in the walk-in freezer in his basement (next to his personal bar that could seat 20.. yeah, Grandpa B was cool in some ways). Both of my older brothers enjoy hunting. Me, I'm the one that catches spiders in the house to release outdoors, stops to help turtles cross the road, and will hold perfectly still hoping a dragonfly lands on my hand. Then, on one of my midnight walks around the local 220+ acre lake I heard coyotes on the trail ahead of me. So yeah, I bought my first shotgun. But don't worry, it's a revolving shotgun - I HAD to get something weird. I also keep a handgun locked in a biometric safe under my bed - but that is reserved solely for the zombie apocalypse.

[Lotus the Mermaid]

Lotus, I am so sorry. I retract everything I said. I was having a very difficult morning and I am in no condition to comment on anything. I would delete my post, but I've been quoted, so it's not like I could eliminate my very rash comment altogether.

Again, Lotus, you are nothing if not the sweetest person in the world, and I was an asshole for saying that in the first place.

I hope you can forgive me.

EDIT: I did delete my unbelievably inappropriate post, Lotus. I am truly sorry.

It's okay! I'll delete mine too so there's no record of it! I completely understand. You're totally forgiven, of course! No worries. ^-^ :hug:

P. S. I dunno if I'm the sweetest person in the world. I definitely have my moments. Lol
But thank you! Haha :'>

[Ashe]

Not a bitch, but just a little something I wanted to write about because I think that's good :)
This morning I uncovered my parakeet cage to find that my beautiful little bird Haru had passed on during the night. It was so sudden, and he had given me no sign that anything was wrong. I've been absolutely heartbroken through the entire day and I've been breaking down a little, but I suppose thats normal in a time of loss. He's been my best friend, and we had such a strong bond.

Haru's brother (by blood) Rin and I have been adjusting well enough throughout the day. It's not easy losing a loved one but I've learned that it's good to let the tears out for a day and keep on keeping on. I believe that Rin has gotten over the bulk of trauma considering he was in the cage with Haru when he left. Currently Rin has been signing and playing and acting normally, but of course I will keep my eye on him. I'm keeping music on and dancing and talking to him. Rin and I never bonded much at all aside from hopping onto my finger when I tell him to. Maybe now we have a chance to build a friendship!

I haven't talked to many people about his passing because usually people don't think much of pet birds, especially parakeets. I find the looks I get from people when I talk about my birds to be so funny. The obviously don't realize that when I say that the little ones each have their own amazing personalities and characteristic, I'm not some child making these things up. Each bird is truly one of a kind, and any other good bird owner will agree with me whole heartedly. People don't realize how much goes into caring for birds, but the amount of love and attention they need is immense. I love my birds so much and consider them to be a big part of my family.

Anyways, I've just been a lame mood for the day but I wanted to get that little bit out of my system :)

[TritonsGuard]

Gun politics, huh? Here's the deal. The reason why gun rights advocates don't budge is that after every shooting, you blame them as if they did it. No. They didn't harm anyone, so don't pin it on the good guys. If someone drowned in a mermaid tail, should all of us be blamed for it (by the way, that is likely how people will react, given how they act when we have a perfect record)? The next thing is everything that has been suggested only affects people who use guns lawfully. In other words, they are trying to punish the innocent. Like anyone, if you declare them the enemy, they will not work with you. If you want to work together to try to make things better, stop treating us as the enemy

[Aysun_the_Mermaid]

I am so sorry to hear that, Kalani.

As a person who cries when my fish die, I can understand your feelings at the passing of your bird.

I am glad you have his brother to help you through this time. I hope you two create your own special bond :)

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

[TritonsGuard]

I am sorry for your loss. It hurts when a pet dies. I hope you'll be alright.

[Mer-Crazy]

Arghhhhhh! It's nearly 12 at night, I'm super tired and I just wanna go to bed but there's an 8foot python in my bedroom :/

[saborigakusei]

:jawdrop: I... I'm sorry? Just a random uninvited python..?

[Merenneito Nerissa]

So sorry, but just laughed so much for those last two comments... :D :D

[Mer-Crazy]

Yeah :( my cat was acting super skittish and wouldn't go down the stairs and we knew she's only acted like that once before when she found a snake outside. So we looked around and it has settled in behind my TV unit and is now wedged inbetween the stereo. It keeps bearing it's fangs and getting ready to strike when we look at it.

[Ashe]

Oh my. I'm trying to suppress my laughter here but the whole situation kind of seems comical :lol: I hope that you get the little, er, big guy and everyone is safe!
May I ask how you got an eight foot python in your room?

[Ashe]

And update on my side: Rin seems to be doing just fine! I'm worried about leaving him alone for the day to go to class, but I think he'll be fine. He's been eating like a pig (super good sign) and acting fairly normally. Birds know when a flock mate has been lost, so I think we are on the safe side here.
Thank you guys :)

[Merman Dan]

Turn off the TV and stereo. When they cool down it'll probably come out to find a warmer spot.

[Ashe]

Have you called animal control?

[Sherielle]

Kalani, it doesn't matter if your pet is a dog, a parakeet or a fish. If you have become attached to them, it hurts when they leave us. I had a wonderful parakeet named Zeke who was a joy and he died in a very similar way, totally unexpected. I'm glad that Rin is doing well and I hope you and he become better friends.

[Mermaid Mystery]

yeah don't go in your room. Python teeth are nasty. I'm sure you already know that lol. Hope everything goes smoothly! I didn't think that was a common occurrence lol.

[PearlieMae]

Turn off the TV and stereo. When they cool down it'll probably come out to find a warmer spot.

Like your bed.

[Ashe]

Pearlie no don't say that :lol:

Were you able to get the snake out of there?

[Merman Dan]

Like your bed.

Well, there is that. ;) When I had a burmese python he would wrap around my ankles when I slept.

[Mer-Crazy]

Well it probably came in from out the back, it is Australia and I've seen that sucker hanging out in the backyard before. We could have called animal control but it was the middle of the night and it would have cost a couple of hundred to get someone to come out. So we just crocodile-huntered it, put on all the bike gear and put it in a cat box and took it to the bush and let it go. (here's a photo of the same snake from a week or so ago in our backyard)

33663

[Mermaid Mystery]

maybe you should invest in snake hooks? lmao this is one of the strangest stories I've heard from someone I know (besides the time my friend's mom ran over a kangaroo)

[Merman Jamie]

cute little snake there MerCrazy

[Mer-Crazy]

He was pretty cute :) But pretty sure he wanted to eat my cat so he had to go.

[saborigakusei]

Okay so it's probably not awesome at all, but my instinctual reaction was omfg that's awesome. xD

Nothing that interesting happens where I live lol. And that snake is gorgeous.<33

[Merman Jamie]

He was pretty cute :) But pretty sure he wanted to eat my cat so he had to go.

Im sure he just wanted to give big hugs to all. lol

[PearlieMae]

AAAH! Australia!

:doh:

That explains so much!

[Mermaid Lunette]

I certainly hope you aren't freaking out about your tail. Believe me, I am trying as hard and as fast as I can.

ack! :eek:

actually it is something super personal that honestly does not belong on the mermaid forum! i feel embarrassed now just posting it :'( i deleted it out of shame. sorry if i worried anyone! this forum really wasn't the place to even vaguely discuss it. so sorry :'(

[PearlieMae]

No! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make this about me! F*ck! I need to back off the keyboard.

[Aysun_the_Mermaid]

Nooooooooooo...

I am afflicted by allergies :(

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Mystery]

I lost my glasses

[Ariel-Starfish]

I need to get this offcmy chest...

I'M SICK OF HAVING A SURGERY ALL OVER AGAIN!!

I had 2 eye surgeries the past year. My 'worst' eye was falling apart. So I needed 2 surgeries to fix it as good as it could get. Now erlier this week, I had noticed my sight was really getting worse at a one week of time. I was lucky enough to get to the hospital fast enough and told me I have cataract.

The goid point: It won't be a drastic surgery as before, just a new lens. AND they are replacing it with -10 when knowing I have a -16 right now. But I don't want to recover again for so long!! Not being able to go for a swim... Almost having my Merbellas tail on the way (READ: not able to swom in it!! ö ) and just having one eye to focus with... Either way, I'll alway's have tunnel sight and no sighns of depth in my vision. Pff....

[Imogen Finnly]

Okay I have a rant. I have a friend "best friend" really. And all she does is talk about herself all and her problems. She never asks me about my day or my issues with work. When I had to put my cat to sleep, my husband was devastated, she came over the same day and told us how she was having a worse day...at work... while she cried about it (literally) on my patio, my cat was dead. She didn't even give me a chance to talk and when she did she would twist my story around about how her day was worse.
Now she is dating my husbands best friend. And they have been together for 3 months total, and they fight everyday, I know, because that's the only reason she ever hits me up. When she is feeling crappy and wants to be boosted. Not to just hang with me.
So he has and STD and she didn't have it, but she still doesn't want to take my advice on leaving him (such a toxic relationship ) and she stood by him even defending him!!
Anyway, that's just a little tidbit to fill you guys in. I had a dream last night I told her off and I yelled at her, and when I woke up I felt so good. Like in my dream I told her I didn't want to be her friend anymore.
And what bugs me the most is she blows off my job like anyone could do it. It's a pretty dangerous job if you don't know what you're doing. And if she tried it for a day she would quit.
Not only that, but she thinks this hobby is a pretty big joke. I should dump her.


Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk

[Talia]

Ariel, I am so sorry to hear that! I hope your surgery goes well and you can recover promptly.

Imogen, I am so sorry to hear about your cat passing! It is awful to lose a furry family member. That friend of yours, if you pardon my English, bally cheek! Maybe it would not be a bad idea to yell at her a bit. We have a saying in my country that says: "Better one time red than a hundred times yellow". Meaning it is better to lose your temper once than let it simmer in your insides.

Sending you both hugs, if they are welcome. :hug:

[Sherielle]

Okay I have a rant. I have a friend "best friend" really. And all she does is talk about herself all and her problems. She never asks me about my day or my issues with work. When I had to put my cat to sleep, my husband was devastated, she came over the same day and told us how she was having a worse day...at work... while she cried about it (literally) on my patio, my cat was dead. She didn't even give me a chance to talk and when she did she would twist my story around about how her day was worse.
Now she is dating my husbands best friend. And they have been together for 3 months total, and they fight everyday, I know, because that's the only reason she ever hits me up. When she is feeling crappy and wants to be boosted. Not to just hang with me.
So he has and STD and she didn't have it, but she still doesn't want to take my advice on leaving him (such a toxic relationship ) and she stood by him even defending him!!
Anyway, that's just a little tidbit to fill you guys in. I had a dream last night I told her off and I yelled at her, and when I woke up I felt so good. Like in my dream I told her I didn't want to be her friend anymore.
And what bugs me the most is she blows off my job like anyone could do it. It's a pretty dangerous job if you don't know what you're doing. And if she tried it for a day she would quit.
Not only that, but she thinks this hobby is a pretty big joke. I should dump her.


Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk
Dump her. No one needs a toxic friend in their life like that.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Imogen... Id say this in the most least rude way possible... But.

GIRL. DUMP. THAT. FUCKING. PUBLIC. POOL. BITCH.

[Lotus the Mermaid]

Imogen... Id say this in the most least rude way possible... But.

GIRL. DUMP. THAT. FUCKING. PUBLIC. POOL. BITCH.

:clap:

[Imogen Finnly]

Imogen... Id say this in the most least rude way possible... But.

GIRL. DUMP. THAT. FUCKING. PUBLIC. POOL. BITCH.
Yus! It made me mad that she blew off my hobby so rudely. I'd never do that. It's just that she is one of my only friends. Not like I can't make more, but still.
I'm going to start ignoring her. Or should I say something?

Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk

[SeaGlass Siren]

Call the bitch out.

[Imogen Finnly]

I think that's best too... thanks guys!

Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk

[Azurin Luna]

Why is my body mocking me? My period hadn't come in a few weeks, so we were hopeful that I was pregnant, but instead it decided to show up today :( and I have a LARP weekend this weekend, and usually you are not near a toilet during that weekend... Sigh

[Keiris]

Imogen... Id say this in the most least rude way possible... But.

GIRL. DUMP. THAT. FUCKING. PUBLIC. POOL. BITCH.

bahahahahahahahaha!!! How do you REALLY feel about it, SeaGlass?

[Mermaid Kelda]

I'm having a quarter-life crisis.

I'm trying to do something with my life, but I can't think of a single realistic profession that I want to strive towards. At the moment I'm in a mediocre casual job that leaves me less and less happy after every shift. I don't know what job I do want. I can't think of anything worse than clocking in to work every day of my life so that I can earn enough money to spend my weekends doing what I want (whatever that is). I'm also doing a three-quarter workload at uni and am MONTHS behind in content. I'm notoriously lazy and always tell myself everything will be okay. And yeah, in the bigger picture it doesn't matter if I fail a course, but it'll matter to me and somehow I'm not important enough to myself to warrant trying any harder. I'm even wondering if I might have some form of depression that's a cause/symptom of this vicious cycle of apathy.

I have no drive to study the things I am interested in, and even if I did, do I want to spend thousands of dollars on interests that I'm not even sure I'll still have when I graduate? I never seem to have the energy for studying. I'm not passionate about anything and I feel like I'm wasting my life no matter what I'm doing. If I'm not studying, I don't do anything else useful either, because I feel like a failure for not studying, but then I still don't god damn study so I'm double a failure.

Part of me wants to quit everything and just craft things, but that's not going to make me a living on its own, and I want to be useful to society and junk. I can craft things on the side no matter what else I do. In any case, I don't like the idea of spending my life making art. I feel like, personally, I would look back on that and wish I'd pursued other things. It's the right path for other people, but not for me. I don't even know what kind of art I'd make.

I'm so scared of failing or wasting my time on things that I'll never end up using or wanting that I never start or finish anything. I give up on things halfway through, and I don't know whether that's because I lose inspiration, or because I never really had inspiration to begin with, or because I'm just not trying hard enough. Maybe all of those things.

I'm also unreasonably worried about what other people think of what I'm doing. Not that I'm rich or successful, but that what I'm doing is cool. I've wanted to be a falconer, astronomer, lepidopterist, mermaid, anything that's edgy or interesting or different from the norm. I want to get a degree, but so far I've hated every minute of it. I don't hate the content, I don't even hate studying, but I never fucking do it and of course that makes me miserable. I don't even know if I can pull myself out of the backlog I'm in now and pass. If I do, I don't know if I want to keep going. I'm the worst student. I'm the kind of student who wants a degree but isn't willing to put in the hard yards because I'm intelligent enough to pull things off without working for them most of the time and just make do with last-minute-panic, but that doesn't fly in the sciences (do I even want to do science? I don't know! But being in the arts faculty sure didn't get me anywhere either) and isn't a healthy way to get through uni anyway.

I don't even know if I'm expecting help with this, I just needed to get it off my chest.

I'm so sick and tired of this. Sick and tired of being directionless, lazy, apathetic, indecisive. I don't know what to do and I don't know how to find out because choosing a path and walking down it to see what it's like hasn't worked out for me yet. I also know that it's part of the reason my boyfriend broke up with me. It's no fun being with someone who isn't passionate about anything. If you have no passions you have no personality. Your interests and knowledge help make you who you are and I have no interests and no knowledge about anything.

Just. :gah::anger explode: :headwall::help::doh: :fallover::rollover:

[Mer-Crazy]

I really wish I could give you some awesome advice but honestly I don't know, my situation is different from yours. Just know that if you ever need to vent, I'll be there. If you ever wanna come down I'm happy to have you and I'll do my best to be there for you if you ever need :)

[Ariel-Starfish]

Ariel, I am so sorry to hear that! I hope your surgery goes well and you can recover promptly.

Imogen, I am so sorry to hear about your cat passing! It is awful to lose a furry family member. That friend of yours, if you pardon my English, bally cheek! Maybe it would not be a bad idea to yell at her a bit. We have a saying in my country that says: "Better one time red than a hundred times yellow". Meaning it is better to lose your temper once than let it simmer in your insides.

Sending you both hugs, if they are welcome. :hug:


Thanks!! ❤️

[SeaGlass Siren]

bahahahahahahahaha!!! How do you REALLY feel about it, SeaGlass?

How do I feel about it? You mean aside from thinking this girl is the most selfish spoiled cunt ever?

i spurn her kind as I would spurn a rabid dogfish. :drinks wine:

[RastaMer]

I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Just. :gah::anger explode: :headwall::help::doh: :fallover::rollover:

Mermaid Kelda, everything you just said I 100% understand and have felt very similarly if not exactly the same for a lot of my life. I will tell you how I cope with it but it is by no means a solution. I'm sorry to say there is no solution. The reality of the situation is that if you went to a doctor they would probably tell you that you have some sort of depression and put you on pills that probably wouldn't solve anything. Maybe therapy would be helpful but only because talking about things is helpful in general. You don't need to pay someone to do that. I've been down that path and it doesn't solve anything. I largely believe your internal conflict comes from society drilling into you ideas that you don't necessarily believe.

As far as school goes, I hated it too. I could never will myself to study as much as I needed to and I knew I could get by even if I didn't study because I was smart. My best advice is to just finish. I came to the conclusion that I couldn't keep telling myself that school is really important and then continuously not take it seriously. Actions speak louder than words. I began to believe my actions rather than my words and found it helpful. The truth is I don't value school as much as I should and I don't believe it measures intelligence. However, I do believe it is necessary to function normally in today's society and due to that fact, I forced myself to suff through it. I believe you should do the same. I didn't need a degree to validate to myself that I'm smart but I needed a degree to validate to everyone else that I am. Once I kind of said "fuck it" and stopped fooling myself about the amount of work I was going to put in, I became a little happier and stressed less about school. My GPA wasn't great but I graduated.

Getting a job came next. Instead of focusing on the work itself, try to think about what kind of environment you would like to work in. With a lot of people or with only a few? With people your age or with children? With people who want to make a difference in society or with people who just want to make money? I hate working but it's a necessary evil of life. We just need to make it the least painful as possible in every way. At first this is hard because you're limited to entry level jobs but try to turn your negative energy and feelings into motivation to get out of the situation you're in.

Think about what you actually like and what is important to you. For me it's close relationships, mermaids, traveling, family, and maybe a few other things. Make those your main goals in life and then think about all the little things you love like music, movies, art, food, sleeping, writing, the ocean, bare feet, cuddling with a soft blanket, petting your cat. Make sure you savor these things along the way. Life isn't easy for anyone and we, as humans, are in a constant struggle with our consciousness. Don't ever make yourself feel bad because you don't want to do something you feel you should be doing. If you don't want to do it just say "fuck it" I'm going to watch a movie because I enjoy that a million times more. And a lot of people think that's a bad attitude but fuck them too. We're all gonna die and I would rather go out knowing I had a fun life rather than a stressful one full of internal conflict.

I think you need to find more balance in your life. Be true to yourself and what you actually think is important. Think about why you value those things. Is it because that is what you think your supposed to be doing or because it actually makes you happy? Obviously, with that logic you could go around killing people and be like "oh, well it makes me happy". That's where you need to find balance between doing what you want and what society wants. You can't be too indulgent in what you want or you'll never accomplish anything and be living in your parents basement forever but you can't give into what society wants or you'll never be happy with yourself.

Sorry for the long post, I hope this is helpful. I have an attitude that's like "fuck it" and that works for some people and not for others. I don't know what works for you but I hope you can figure it out!

[Merman Arion]

Mermaid Kelda, everything you just said I 100% understand and have felt very similarly if not exactly the same for a lot of my life. I will tell you how I cope with it but it is by no means a solution. I'm sorry to say there is no solution. The reality of the situation is that if you went to a doctor they would probably tell you that you have some sort of depression and put you on pills that probably wouldn't solve anything. Maybe therapy would be helpful but only because talking about things is helpful in general. You don't need to pay someone to do that. I've been down that path and it doesn't solve anything. I largely believe your internal conflict comes from society drilling into you ideas that you don't necessarily believe.

As far as school goes, I hated it too. I could never will myself to study as much as I needed to and I knew I could get by even if I didn't study because I was smart. My best advice is to just finish. I came to the conclusion that I couldn't keep telling myself that school is really important and then continuously not take it seriously. Actions speak louder than words. I began to believe my actions rather than my words and found it helpful. The truth is I don't value school as much as I should and I don't believe it measures intelligence. However, I do believe it is necessary to function normally in today's society and due to that fact, I forced myself to suff through it. I believe you should do the same. I didn't need a degree to validate to myself that I'm smart but I needed a degree to validate to everyone else that I am. Once I kind of said "fuck it" and stopped fooling myself about the amount of work I was going to put in, I became a little happier and stressed less about school. My GPA wasn't great but I graduated.

Getting a job came next. Instead of focusing on the work itself, try to think about what kind of environment you would like to work in. With a lot of people or with only a few? With people your age or with children? With people who want to make a difference in society or with people who just want to make money? I hate working but it's a necessary evil of life. We just need to make it the least painful as possible in every way. At first this is hard because you're limited to entry level jobs but try to turn your negative energy and feelings into motivation to get out of the situation you're in.

Think about what you actually like and what is important to you. For me it's close relationships, mermaids, traveling, family, and maybe a few other things. Make those your main goals in life and then think about all the little things you love like music, movies, art, food, sleeping, writing, the ocean, bare feet, cuddling with a soft blanket, petting your cat. Make sure you savor these things along the way. Life isn't easy for anyone and we, as humans, are in a constant struggle with our consciousness. Don't ever make yourself feel bad because you don't want to do something you feel you should be doing. If you don't want to do it just say "fuck it" I'm going to watch a movie because I enjoy that a million times more. And a lot of people think that's a bad attitude but fuck them too. We're all gonna die and I would rather go out knowing I had a fun life rather than a stressful one full of internal conflict.

I think you need to find more balance in your life. Be true to yourself and what you actually think is important. Think about why you value those things. Is it because that is what you think your supposed to be doing or because it actually makes you happy? Obviously, with that logic you could go around killing people and be like "oh, well it makes me happy". That's where you need to find balance between doing what you want and what society wants. You can't be too indulgent in what you want or you'll never accomplish anything and be living in your parents basement forever but you can't give into what society wants or you'll never be happy with yourself.

Sorry for the long post, I hope this is helpful. I have an attitude that's like "fuck it" and that works for some people and not for others. I don't know what works for you but I hope you can figure it out!

Best post I've read in a while.
I applaud you for the commitment into helping Kelda :clap: :clap: :clap:

I totally feel the struggle. I have been there too.

[RastaMer]

Thank Arion! It's hard not to speak up when I saw so much of myself in what Kelda posted.

[Mermaid Kelda]

Thank you, Rasta. I know I'm not alone with this - people who know what they want and have their life together are few and far between. It's just so frustrating to have no idea at all of what I want to do.

My "fuck it" attitude up till now has been what's stopped me from doing really well. I think I need to shift my perspective and say fuck it to being miserable instead, like you. I only deserve what I strive for, so unless I strive for something I don't deserve anything. But as soon as I do set my sights on something concrete, I know I can get there if I don't take my own shit when it comes to procrastination.

I agree with you about finding a balance. I could live in a cottage on a mountain and paint for the rest of my life and be content, but I wouldn't be fulfilled. Ephemeral pleasures aren't worth losing partners, or my own happiness, over. I'm glad to know you felt the same way about study and still managed to push through your degree. That gives me hope for myself. I know I can achieve things if I put my mind to them - but I have to put my mind to the right things.

I think I knew all these things, but I needed to get it all out and down on paper, so to speak. It's affirming to read similar stories.

And thank you Mer-Crazy, as well<3

[Sherielle]

Kelda, first off.....don't worry so much about that. When I was 25, I was starting college (again) and studying to be a vet tech. After two years of that and then three working for vets, I realized it wasn't right for me. But that experience gave me knowledge that applied to my next job. Which gave me more knowledge to my next job. I have ended up working in accounting with a side business of jewelry making. I still don't know where I'll be when I grow up, but at 48, I have a better idea. You are definitely NOT alone or weird in feeling that way.
Hugs and mucho support.

[Imogen Finnly]

Ariel, I am so sorry to hear that! I hope your surgery goes well and you can recover promptly.

Imogen, I am so sorry to hear about your cat passing! It is awful to lose a furry family member. That friend of yours, if you pardon my English, bally cheek! Maybe it would not be a bad idea to yell at her a bit. We have a saying in my country that says: "Better one time red than a hundred times yellow". Meaning it is better to lose your temper once than let it simmer in your insides.

Sending you both hugs, if they are welcome. :hug:
Thank you! [emoji8]

Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Kelda]

Thank you, Sherielle. That's comforting :) I guess it doesn't matter what I'm doing or where I'm going as long as I'm happy and healthy. And to be happy I need to stop worrying so much about having a 15 year plan!

[Naufra]

That uncomfortable moment when the people around you are hating on things that you rely on everyday and will rely on for the rest of your life because they enable you to be a productive member of society.

Rasta, you made a lot of great points in your reply to Kelda, and I don't mean this as an attack on you in any way, but I'm sick of people hating on Psychiatry and pharmaceuticals.

Yes, some psychology is bogus as was said earlier in the thread though I forget who by, but we've really only begun, as a species, to really try to address mental health issues. I would compare Freud's psychology to the Theory of the Four Humors, it really is the earliest of attempts to understand and treat the mind. I would compared electroshock to the medicinal use of leeches. The sciences of psychology and psychiatry are in their infancy, but they're already starting to really help people who would otherwise be institutionalized for life to be productive, contributing members of society. I don't normally discuss this online, but I'm a diagnosed Mixed-Type Bipolar. Through the help of my psychiatrist, some psychoactive pharmaceuticals, and sometimes a therapist, in addition to my own hard work and daily struggles, I'm functional. I'm working six days a week between my internship for school and my paying job, I pay taxes, I vote after researching the issues. I've been scared out of my mind by reading about what I could become if left untreated. I've seen the kind of wreck I would be without treatment during meds-changes, while transitioning off of one drug and onto a new one. During my last meds-change, I had the most terrifying mixed-mania I've ever had in my life. Two hours felt like twenty-four while my emotions ran wild, literally all of my emotions all at once, leaving me an inconsolable wretch while one of my best friends struggled desperately to calm me down via Facebook chat.

Don't get me wrong, many pharmaceutical companies are absolute sleazebags. If they were altruistic, we wouldn't need the Orphan Drug Act to make things like a vaccine against Ebola happen. The medicines they turn out, on the other hand, are life-saving in more ways than expected. As unbelievable as this may sound to someone outside of any medical field, Viagra has saved the lives of countless premature babies. This is an off-label use for it, but its' vasodilative properties have helped the hearts of neonates pump sufficient blood to keep premies alive until they're strong enough on their own. Viagra for premies is not directly relevant to psychiatry, but it's an example of how even the dumbest-seeming pharmaceuticals are saving lives every day.

To clarify, this rant isn't stemming solely from the conversations here on MerNetwork. I'm faced with disparaging remarks against the very things that allow me to live as a functional person from many sources, including friends, family, and total strangers on a regular basis. The simmer has finally come to a boil, and I had to say something this time.

[RastaMer]

Naifra, I'm not trying to hate on mental health treatment. I'm sorry you've gotten so much shit for the medications your condition. I've been diagnosed with several different mental health conditions and was treated very differently by friends and family when I was on medication as well. It's hard for people to take it seriously when doctors are handing out antidepressants like candy now. At this rate, we'll all be taking antidepressants like it's ibuprofen in a few decades. For any rick and morty fans...

https://i.imgflip.com/sztym.gif (https://imgflip.com/gif/sztym)

I'm not on anything anymore but I strongly believe if these medications are helpful to you then fuck the haters and do what you need to do to get through this life but try to enjoy it! We're all struggling here and drugged up in one way or another.

[Mermaid Alea]

This semester of college has been a HUGE workload for me. Normally in college I will have a week here and there where I will be super busy, but this semester it is EVERY week and weekend that I am busy. I am a little upset about it for a few reasons...

The first reason is I wish I could dedicate more time to some of the art projects. I have been assigned some interesting projects this semester such as designing something for 3D printing, etc. I wish I had more time to devote to the cool assignments, but instead I am scrambling to get it done so I can move on to working on the projects in my other classes. I want to make it good enough that I want to keep it you know?

The second reason is I want chill time and I also want time to work on my own projects. At least once a week I get overwhelmed thinking of all the other things I have to do and want to do besides schoolwork. I still need to build an aviary, get better at sculpting, swim in my tail (reaaaally want to do that), work out, etc.

It is craziness. Just today from 10:00 am to 12:00 pm I have been working on homework. Of course I took a break to feed my birds and eat lunch and dinner, but yeah homework all day.

Luckily I think I am doing okay. At the beginning of the semester I had trouble getting into doing the work because I took summer courses and was ready for a break but I only got like a week off. Now I have a lot of drive to get the work done, but I just miss being free on the weekends. Then on the few days I finally don't have something to do, I am too tired to do anything. :shame:

I'll be okay, but it has really been exhausting.

[lulubelle]

Okay I have a rant. I have a friend "best friend" really. And all she does is talk about herself all and her problems. She never asks me about my day or my issues with work. When I had to put my cat to sleep, my husband was devastated, she came over the same day and told us how she was having a worse day...at work... while she cried about it (literally) on my patio, my cat was dead. She didn't even give me a chance to talk and when she did she would twist my story around about how her day was worse.
Now she is dating my husbands best friend. And they have been together for 3 months total, and they fight everyday, I know, because that's the only reason she ever hits me up. When she is feeling crappy and wants to be boosted. Not to just hang with me.
So he has and STD and she didn't have it, but she still doesn't want to take my advice on leaving him (such a toxic relationship ) and she stood by him even defending him!!
Anyway, that's just a little tidbit to fill you guys in. I had a dream last night I told her off and I yelled at her, and when I woke up I felt so good. Like in my dream I told her I didn't want to be her friend anymore.
And what bugs me the most is she blows off my job like anyone could do it. It's a pretty dangerous job if you don't know what you're doing. And if she tried it for a day she would quit.
Not only that, but she thinks this hobby is a pretty big joke. I should dump her.


Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk



I had a friend like that. I was a bridesmaid in her wedding and she was my maid of honor. I was with her when she had her first child. We were really close.
It took me a really long time to realize that the friendship was so one sided. It really wasn't until I got busy with growing my family and didn't have time to cater to her that it all blew up. I ended up cutting her off 8 years ago. And occasionally I'll get a message "why aren't we friends anymore? I miss you, I'm so sad" and I used to engage and chat with her and it would just go right back to being all about her.

Cutting her off for the final time was the best thing I've ever done for my mental health. As a bonus it made me recognize the beginnings of those sorts sorts of relationships earlier on and I'm able to distance myself from those sorts of people. I call them "Small Dose Friends", as in I can be friendly but only in small doses.

[Imogen Finnly]

I had a friend like that. I was a bridesmaid in her wedding and she was my maid of honor. I was with her when she had her first child. We were really close.
It took me a really long time to realize that the friendship was so one sided. It really wasn't until I got busy with growing my family and didn't have time to cater to her that it all blew up. I ended up cutting her off 8 years ago. And occasionally I'll get a message "why aren't we friends anymore? I miss you, I'm so sad" and I used to engage and chat with her and it would just go right back to being all about her.

Cutting her off for the final time was the best thing I've ever done for my mental health. As a bonus it made me recognize the beginnings of those sorts sorts of relationships earlier on and I'm able to distance myself from those sorts of people. I call them "Small Dose Friends", as in I can be friendly but only in small doses.
Oh my god yes!!! I seriously can only handle her maybe once or twice every three weeks. Like I'm assuming that she is having pretty decent time right now since she hasn't hit me up for anything at all. Seriously like she posts on Fb all the time and talks about her "amazing vacation" (when she found out her by had huge std) and she is all "tra la la la I loved my first vacation!" But she blows up my phone when I'm with my husband about how terrible it was for HOURS.
Now that things are great I'm not her bff. But when it hits the fan, she needs me and I'm the only one that gets her.
I'm currently avoiding her. Nothing is going to change with this chick.

Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk

[Lotus the Mermaid]

Okay I have a rant. I have a friend "best friend" really. And all she does is talk about herself all and her problems. She never asks me about my day or my issues with work. When I had to put my cat to sleep, my husband was devastated, she came over the same day and told us how she was having a worse day...at work... while she cried about it (literally) on my patio, my cat was dead. She didn't even give me a chance to talk and when she did she would twist my story around about how her day was worse.
Now she is dating my husbands best friend. And they have been together for 3 months total, and they fight everyday, I know, because that's the only reason she ever hits me up. When she is feeling crappy and wants to be boosted. Not to just hang with me.
So he has and STD and she didn't have it, but she still doesn't want to take my advice on leaving him (such a toxic relationship ) and she stood by him even defending him!!
Anyway, that's just a little tidbit to fill you guys in. I had a dream last night I told her off and I yelled at her, and when I woke up I felt so good. Like in my dream I told her I didn't want to be her friend anymore.
And what bugs me the most is she blows off my job like anyone could do it. It's a pretty dangerous job if you don't know what you're doing. And if she tried it for a day she would quit.
Not only that, but she thinks this hobby is a pretty big joke. I should dump her.


Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk

I wanted to reply to this earlier, but it's been hectic.

My best friend of seven years was (and still is - just not to me) emotionally abusive. She not only cared more about herself than anyone else, she would often use me to get guy friends in high school. She would tell them she could get them a date with me if they wanted and then would talk them up to me. They were always sleazy, immature guys and once I met them, I was smart enough to realize this so her plan to pimp me out always backfired. I never understood why she cared more about her standing with those weirdos than with me. She followed me to every school I switched to, and I switched a good four times. Then, she followed me to college. I realize now it was all for power. Anytime I had the courage to say something good about myself, she would assure me I was wrong. If I got upset at her, I was being an irrational woman. She got a mutual friend to agree for a while and now, she considers that friend of mine her best friend. If we hadn't been best friends since we were 8, she would have convinced her to dump me with the things she said about me. I thank God my reputation as an honest individual precedes me. She doesn't have the same luxury. It took God to show me how awful she was to me. I remember praying about it when she was getting jealous of my now-husband. I opened my Bible to Proverbs 27:17 NLT, "As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend." It wasn't even something I was looking for. It hit me in that moment that God Himself was telling me, "Get out of this friendship! It's not this type of friendship! It's hurting you!" The next time I saw her, I finally told her we weren't good for each other and that we shouldn't be "best friends," a title she always gladly flaunted with me as though I was some sort of trophy. She stopped talking to me for a long time. We're acquaintances now because I refuse to be anywhere alone with her, but she's still part of my outer social circle. If I had my way, I would never have to see her again, but I have peace now about where we are. I know this story was long, but it's for anyone who feels they may be in an abusive relationship to know the damage that can come from it! It took me over two years and there are still residual effects that the Lord, my husband, and even for a short time, a psychiatrist have helped me through. I'm extremely thankful and I hope no one else is as naive as I was.

[Imogen Finnly]

Wow! She sounds like she has self esteem issues.
Thank you for sharing that! It was a very heart filled strong story!

Sent from my SM-N920P using Tapatalk

[Aysun_the_Mermaid]

SOME ASSHAT POSTED PORN ON MY MERMAID FACEBOOK PAGE.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Kelda]

WHAT

[Aysun_the_Mermaid]

RAAAAAAAGE

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

[PearlieMae]

I hate when that happens, especially if it's boring porn.