B!TC# IT OUT!

[Mermaid Lilium]

People like that make me feel physically ill, and slightly fear the world in which my sweet baby will someday find himself. I only hope I can raise a good, kind, loving and Compassionate human being, who will be strong enough to not let the world tear him down. I hope for this for all children.

The fact that you hope that, means your little one will turn out just fine =)

[Miyu]

I. LOVE YOU!

LOL :P I just watched that ep. of HIMYM last night... I love Marshall SO MUCH. He's adorable.

[SeaGlass Siren]

can't i just punjab-lasso him?

[Mermaid Lilium]

can't i just punjab-lasso him?

sure, especially as you just earned brownie points for the phantom reference <3

[Mermaid Lilium]

Ugh. I have been sick for weeks now. The doctor says its either mono or post-concussive syndrome. Both suck. Two years ago when I last had mono, I missed five months of school. My social life fell apart, I lost any muscle I had. I do not want to go through that again, especially when I was doing really well in skiing and just getting comfortable with friends from switching school. And if its post-concussive. Thats even worse. A year and a half ago right as I was getting on my feet again from mono I got a very bad concussion, or rather upwards of fifty mini concussions. It was so bad that I cant remember the whole six months afterwards. I know I mostly just sat and stared at the wall. My concussion had a lot of effects, and even though I have just been feeling better from it for a couple months it is still effecting me. Like I have constant headaches, lost more than ten iq points, and can't ever jump on a trampoline again. So if I have post-concussive from somehow boggiling up my brains again, I could be out for a long time. Just bleh. This is not how I imagined my teen years would be, and I cannot deal with being sick/injured again, but I cannot even get through a day of school.

*wraps you up in bubble-wrap and cuddles*

[SeaGlass Siren]

sure, especially as you just earned brownie points for the phantom reference <3

AWE YISS!!!

[Mermaid Dottie]

I wish I could bake everybody here cookies shaped like cute fishies.

[Mermaid Lilium]

I wish I could bake everybody here cookies shaped like cute fishies.

I get similar urges to bake sea-themed cupcakes for everyone :')

cake, tea and hugs fix all ills lol

[Mermaid Dottie]

It seems you and I are a little like-minded, Lilium. :)
:thumbs-up: Cheers! :Lifts teacup:

[Mermaid Lilium]

It seems you and I are a little like-minded, Lilium. :)
:thumbs-up: Cheers! :Lifts teacup:

*makes sure her pinky finger is poking out while she drinks her matcha green tea* quite right :')

[Aziara]

Ugh. I have been sick for weeks now. The doctor says its either mono or post-concussive syndrome. Both suck. Two years ago when I last had mono, I missed five months of school. My social life fell apart, I lost any muscle I had. I do not want to go through that again, especially when I was doing really well in skiing and just getting comfortable with friends from switching school. And if its post-concussive. Thats even worse. A year and a half ago right as I was getting on my feet again from mono I got a very bad concussion, or rather upwards of fifty mini concussions. It was so bad that I cant remember the whole six months afterwards. I know I mostly just sat and stared at the wall. My concussion had a lot of effects, and even though I have just been feeling better from it for a couple months it is still effecting me. Like I have constant headaches, lost more than ten iq points, and can't ever jump on a trampoline again. So if I have post-concussive from somehow boggiling up my brains again, I could be out for a long time. Just bleh. This is not how I imagined my teen years would be, and I cannot deal with being sick/injured again, but I cannot even get through a day of school.

If it is the effects of a concussion, I know something that would help you greatly. I took it after I was in a car wreck and slammed the top of my head into the dashboard (ouch!) http://www.theherbsplace.com/Brain_Protex_W_Huperzine_p_468.html It's called Brain Protex, and it helps your body to repair the damage from a concussion by increasing circulation in the brain. If you take too much at once, it will give you weird headaches because you're healing too fast, so only start out with one a day.

[Seatan]

So here I am at work at five pm printing out 60 page packets for two of my freshmen classes (35 kids each) who are being so bad they are being put on lockdown. There will be nothing but silent desk work for them until they show they can behave. I will be "graduating" students who give a shit so I can actually teach them worth a damn. I am so tired of teenagers having no respect--and I don't mean "oh they should respect mer I am a teacher" ( even though they should). I mean having any respect at all. I give instructions and they basically laugh in my face. I tell them to do something and I get a smart ass comment, I tell them to stop doing something and they do it right in front of me. People have all this bad stuff to say about teachers but they have no understanding of how we are treated day in and day out. The way these kids behave, they would be fired in an instant at a job and get a ticket for disruption of the peace at a mall. The patents never have your back, of course, so the kids just don't care! They know they will have no real consequences. I am so tired.....

[SeaGlass Siren]

http://mernetwork.com/index/webkit-fake-url://DA85706F-FDE0-4CD7-9472-A54396D0FCC6/imagejpeg

[Mermaid Jaffa]

So here I am at work at five pm printing out 60 page packets for two of my freshmen classes (35 kids each) who are being so bad they are being put on lockdown. There will be nothing but silent desk work for them until they show they can behave. I will be "graduating" students who give a shit so I can actually teach them worth a damn. I am so tired of teenagers having no respect--and I don't mean "oh they should respect mer I am a teacher" ( even though they should). I mean having any respect at all. I give instructions and they basically laugh in my face. I tell them to do something and I get a smart ass comment, I tell them to stop doing something and they do it right in front of me. People have all this bad stuff to say about teachers but they have no understanding of how we are treated day in and day out. The way these kids behave, they would be fired in an instant at a job and get a ticket for disruption of the peace at a mall. The patents never have your back, of course, so the kids just don't care! They know they will have no real consequences. I am so tired.....

Kids have no respect these days.

To parents, a school is another name for daycare centre. They drop their kid(s) off, go off to work and come back for them 8 hours later. Just like a kiddy daycare centre.

Back in the day, when I was at primary school, had teachers that humiliate and nuns that hit with rulers. I was left handed then and the nuns used to hit my left hand across the knuckles whenever I wrote with it, until they were swollen. It was how they disciplined us. Parents hit us as kids, that was discipline too cos if we were naughty, we were beaten. And the teachers were worse, if you didn't do the homework for their classes, they made you hang that homework book on your belt (my school uniform had a belt), you had to wear it all day even at break times, so EVERYONE in the entire school could see you didn't do your homework. Total embarrassment and humiliation. This was 30 years ago. Times have changed in terms of discipline.

Can't do all that nowadays, its called abuse. Which kinda sucks for teachers cos the kids know if they do something wrong, they can get away with it.

[Mermaid Kelda]

Can't do all that nowadays, its called abuse. Which kinda sucks for teachers cos the kids know if they do something wrong, they can get away with it.
That is abuse. Being beaten because you're left handed is absurd.

I don't know if I just happened to grow up in a good area or if Australian schools are on the whole better than US ones, but holy crap the stuff I hear kids doing over there is insane. I think people tend to generalise, though; "kids have no respect these days" is a very broad term to use. There are millions of well adjusted, bright, progressive kids out there, who aren't that way because they were beaten. Honestly I think most of it is the parents' fault; I feel that kids need the right kind of love and education and discipline from their parents, otherwise it's tough for them to grow up into kind, smart adults, no matter how good their school teachers are.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Yea that's true. I think also depends on the parents. If they don't give a hoot, then their kids are going to copy their parents attitude.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Different situations I suppose.

My parents stopped disciplining me when I got into grade 6. Dunno what happened but i still remained a decent child. My older half sister however is the most spoiled brat ever. When my mother tried to discipline her, that halfbreed punched her. She hasn't been disciplined in forever but because of that she thinks she can do whatever she wants :/


And then there's my younger sister who was not disciplined at all and is a good kid. I dunno. My trance is it also depends on the kid ._.

[Mermaid Lorelei]

This might be my first post in this thread, but I'm seriously ready to punch someone right now.
People are stupid. -.-' I'm tired of people constantly asking me for free tails and other free stuff on my mermaid page. Stuff like MAKE ME ONE, or CAN I HAVE ONE FOR FREE, or (my favorite) YOU NEED TO GIVE ME YOUR BEST QUALITY TAIL FOR FREE OR I'M GOING TO TRASH YOUR BUSINESS!!!??! ... I see the same thing happen on other mermaid's pages too and it bugs me. Why in the world do people think it's acceptable to demand free things from small businesses? I mentioned once on another friend's page that it might be nice to say please when demanding free stuff and I was told to screw myself. Go figure. -pissed- :doh:

[Mermaid Adriel]

People are stupid. -.-' I'm tired of people constantly asking me for free tails and other free stuff on my mermaid page. Stuff like MAKE ME ONE, or CAN I HAVE ONE FOR FREE, or (my favorite) YOU NEED TO GIVE ME YOUR BEST QUALITY TAIL FOR FREE OR I'M GOING TO TRASH YOUR BUSINESS!!!??! ... I see the same thing happen on other mermaid's pages too and it bugs me. Why in the world do people think it's acceptable to demand free things from small businesses? I mentioned once on another friend's page that it might be nice to say please when demanding free stuff and I was told to screw myself. Go figure. -pissed- :doh:

I can't stand them too -_-' classic of facebook/youtube...

[PearlieMae]

"YOU NEED TO GIVE ME YOUR BEST QUALITY TAIL FOR FREE OR I'M GOING TO TRASH YOUR BUSINESS!!!??!"

WTF is that all about?

[Mermaid Momo]

Okay, I know I haven't been on for a while (hiii :D) but i've been busy trying to get this facebook group into top shape. So as the story goes, I was looking for a facebook group for teens who were interested in paganism and witchcraft (sort of a discussion group not filled with RPers ) and I thought I found a really nice group. BOY WAS I WRONG. People posted things that were really like an RP (like they did a spell that made them tranform their face, or to control people's minds) and it was really getting on my nerves so you know what I did? after I noticed that the admin and creator of the group had abandoned it, I sat myself down on the throne and called it a dictatorship. lol. I remade the whole group. Put in some rules (with the most important ones being don't BS and say you can do those kinds of spells because we all know you can't and you might confuse newbies) Some people left, but more people came in. The group was turning into a cool new discussion group. that was until a certain couple of people aroused from their slumber.(I guess all the recent activity started giving them notifications?) Well my problem with this is that these people are the people who claim that they can do spells to turn people into things or control thoughts. And they keep giving people really horrible advice and choosing to ignore whenever I and other people try to help them with information. (one example is when a new person asked about the different ways you can do magic i.e poppets, sigils, divination etc and this person told them that paganism is one way and wicca another. -___- even after I kept telling them that paganism is an umbrella term they insisted it was a religion like being kemetic or something.)
Another example is this girl who keeps posting that she's a vampire. Now I don't mind otherkin or sanguine vampires. So I asked her if she was otherkin or sanguine or psychic or what kind she was if she wasn't that and she just replied "no i am real." So I and a few others tried to explain to her that those were the types of vampires and she explodes! claiming that we're attacking her and all.
I really don't want to delete them from the group because they need to learn all that they can but It's getting really really hard not to.

[SeaGlass Siren]

i left so many groups before because people were obsessing about how "GACKT IS MINE" or 'HE WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND MY LOVE FOR HIM" as if he knows them personally ._.

Point: Internet be crayy.

[Merman Dan]

GAAAAHHH!!! There's an inch of snow on the ground, the roads are slippery, and I have seven kids with no school today!!!

[Mermaid Dottie]

I am so sorry Dan. That has got to suck squidface.

[Merman Dan]

I'll adapt... add a few extra cups of coffee for me, put some movies on TV, and get ready for an excursion out into the frozen tundra.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Lol an inch? XD try 5 inches and growing ;-; Dan hold me

[Mermaid Dottie]

Normally winters here in Utah are near alaskan in quality, this year has been very mild.

Why must you venture out of doors, Dan? Is it for work, or other errands?

[Merman Dan]

Lol an inch? XD try 5 inches and growing ;-; Dan hold me

LOL! To be fair, when water turns solid my brain short-circuits.

[MerEmma]

I've vented to my friend's basically the same thing a few times already but here goes, since I still don't feel like I've got it out of my system yet. Haha.

So, my raptor costume. Lots of work, huge project hopefully coming to a finish pretty soon along here. When I asked for the spandex skin for Christmas, I also asked for some sparkly blue & silver that matches my Merbella Bracers. I've been hoping to finish it before MegaCon, mostly because it'd be fun to get to swim with it in a different pool than our timeshare. Right now the raptor is at a standstill until the weather warms up (Friday) we buy duct tape, or buy resin. I've had one or two other few-day periods like this and during them I was like hey, let's sew me a tail! 8D
Obviously I'm very anxious to do that, haha. Each time my mum says no way, not starting another project until this is done. I totally get it and understand it, heck, maybe even agree. But still, she's seeing this as being a longer project than it is. From what I can tell, it won't take more than 5 hours. Very simple spandex tail skin, maybe with extra fins or different color fluke. Even then, still not crazy difficult.
I understand it, but I'm still a bit frustrated. At this point I'm hoping the raptor is done at least a week before the con so I can do it then. Maybe not though. :/

Second vent :P
It's a really long story for why but I can't watch more than one episode of Supernatural per day. It's my favorite show ever--literally, the show is just 10/10 every time imo and I love it so much. I was a lil bit addicted to it but I'm genuinely not anymore. So with a show like that...spoilers are KILLER. I'm only in season 8 and I started in September. I had seen a few spoilers at that point so when I got into the show I UNFOLLOWED everyone on Tumblr that was into it too, and downloaded this hardcore Chrome add on called Unspoiler. Blocks every paragraph with the episode title or certain keywords I choose. Really annoying but it has saved my ass from major spoilers before so I'm thankful for it.
The other day I did my usual routine when I find someone new on Tumblr--check their tags for the show, look at the past 10 pages, then followed them. No sight of them enjoying the show.
My laptop and the desktop are an hour away for maintenance as of Monday so I'm using my iPod, scrolling down slowly on the Tumblr mobile site since my iPod is so old I can't download the app or anything, and that user I followed the other day posts a MAJOR SPOILER for Supernatural. And guess what? I can't unfollow them from mobile. So now I'm completely off of Tumblr until I get my laptop back. The spoiler was so major for season 9 and I can't just forget it and now I'm really upset. The show surprises me a lot and spoilers just plain ruin it. Rewatching it and knowing what's going to happen is fun, but there's nothing like the first time I sat there for an episode sobbing. ;\
So most websites I visit don't work on mobile. Mernetwork, another forum & tumblr are really the only ones I've bothered with aside from occasionally Reddit (when it will load :/ ) so earlier I'm scrolling down the What's New and there's a Supernatural thread.

If I had my laptop I'd have no problem, Unspoiler would block it and I could carry on. Now I'm just upset because I'm only left with Reddit and the other forum now. Really forgot how much I appreciate that add on until I get a huge spoiler and it's not there to save me. :/ I don't think I'll log on again until I get my laptop back because I cannot risk more spoilers.
Just...spoilers. They ruin everything.

So now I don't have my favorite websites to comfort me in this time of no-good weather and no cash. If I had the raptor to work on I'd be fine but I'm stuck until then.
Oh goodness my trivial problems
But I think I feel better now
;\

[SeaGlass Siren]

i didnt realize i was bugging people so much until today. just a little hurt because i was trying to help. a little sad and a bit angry. i'm just not gonna come on the forum for a while.

[deepblue]

I think it was just a misunderstanding, SeaGlass. I hope you won't leave.

[Miyu]

Don't go Seaglass... I knew what you meant! :group hug:

[Mermaid Lilium]

seaglass I read it how you intended *hug* please don't leave =)

[AniaR]

Dont over think it and make me your reason for leaving the forum. You posted a meme I took the wrong way cuz there was no context. Its not a big deal a few people told me you're saying I hate you now? I dont hate you
I just didn't agree with your post... In the drama thread... Where people disagree.

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk

[Merman Dan]

n the drama thread... Where people disagree.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnTmBjk-M0c

[SeaGlass Siren]

Ok I'm back after a short 3-4 day mernetwork detox. I'm ok now guys.


Also, guys I never went around saying "Raina hates me" . I said and meant that it feels like I annoy her. Where did "hate" come from?

[Merman Dan]

Where did "hate" come from?

The Grinch? ;)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86jbnMOAcy0

[Merman Arion]

It doesn't matter where the word "hate" came from, I believe you're not responsable. I'm glad you're back and feeling well.

It's a beautiful day where I am today so we should move on and enjoy.

January has been a stressful month full of drama. Let's make February a better memory.


:group hug:

[SeaGlass Siren]

" i'm just not gonna come on the forum for a while." also when I said this, "a while" meant "a while or short period of time". Oops! Didn't think people would think longer :confused:

[SeaGlass Siren]

But thanks for your kind words everyone.

[deepblue]

Seriously, if one more person in my circle of friend and acquaintances dies, I'm going to lose my mind. RIP Ash. This makes... 9 for me, though a couple of those weren't known by the rest. All but one of these people in their 30s. Enough already.

[Mermaid Dottie]

:hug:I read that, Surly, and had to do a double take. Leo and I named our baby Ash.
I miscarried her at 12 weeks.

[SeaGlass Siren]

I'm sorry you two :( :hugs:

[deepblue]

Thank you. I'm angry- not at him. He killed himself. But I'm angry in general and so fucking sad.

But. Taking it off this thread now.

I'm grateful I have nothing to bitch about. I just needed to vent that, but I took it to the mental health thread.

[Mermaid Adriel]

Sad to hear you, girls :sad eyes:

[Aziara]

I really don't know what's wrong with me... Lately I'm always half a step away from breaking down crying. I used to be so stoic, but lately I feel like someone replaced the steel in my backbone with half-baked marshmallows, and I'm just crumbling. I didn't have the best childhood, and I always had this well of strength to draw from, but now it seems when I try to pull from that well I get nothing but dust and tears. Yesterday, I felt the first inklings of inspiration for writing for the first time in almost 3 years.... Then my husband had to mention "You ever gonna publish?". Know this: the reason I haven't felt like writing in nearly 3 years is because I tried to publish. I contacted an editor, gave him the first 80 pages of my book, he raved about how awesome it was, and then refused to take my calls over the next several months. So I'm left thinking that he lied about how much he loved it. My inspiration died completely at the mention of the 'P' word, and once again writing is the last thing I want to do. I feel like my brain had an abortion. This really doesn't help my emotional state any.

[Mermaid Lorelei]

Did you tell your husband that?

[PearlieMae]

It sounds like you might be battling depression...talk to a professional about that!

But the other issue, something I feel more confident about commenting on, you live in a fabulous age where publishers are obsolete. These days, you can self publish without huge investment, heck, any investment other than your writing and your willingness to promote yourself. If you want to publish on paper, Lulu and Blurb both print on demand, meaning you don't have to worry about having "paper on the floor". Many other new and successful authors offer only ebook versions of their work. I don't want to speak for her, but I'm sure Raina can offer some pointers as well. J.K. Rowling lived in her car before she published Harry Potter, and now she is one of the richest women in the world! Just because one publisher blew smoke up your ass then ditched your calls is no reason to let it derail you. I worked in publishing since the eighties, and most of the time, the people who sign book deals couldn't find their butts with both hands.

Breathe. The inspiration will come again. I'm sure your husband was trying to be helpful. I know I'm rooting for you! :hug:

[deepblue]

I really don't know what's wrong with me... Lately I'm always half a step away from breaking down crying. I used to be so stoic, but lately I feel like someone replaced the steel in my backbone with half-baked marshmallows, and I'm just crumbling. I didn't have the best childhood, and I always had this well of strength to draw from, but now it seems when I try to pull from that well I get nothing but dust and tears. Yesterday, I felt the first inklings of inspiration for writing for the first time in almost 3 years.... Then my husband had to mention "You ever gonna publish?". Know this: the reason I haven't felt like writing in nearly 3 years is because I tried to publish. I contacted an editor, gave him the first 80 pages of my book, he raved about how awesome it was, and then refused to take my calls over the next several months. So I'm left thinking that he lied about how much he loved it. My inspiration died completely at the mention of the 'P' word, and once again writing is the last thing I want to do. I feel like my brain had an abortion. This really doesn't help my emotional state any.

It might help if you swim on over to the Mer-Writers (http://mernetwork.com/index/showthread.php?5504-The-Mer-Writers-Thread) thread- a few of us have probably been through similar. I know I have, if not the same situation. And for me, writing has nothing to do with being published. It would be awesome. But I finally decided I write for the love of it, and I don't have to be great to do something I love. I've been there, having some thing about my writing trigger a total shut down in the writing creativity, and it's a terrible feeling. It's like losing who you are. But if you want to ask at the writer's thread, you might find tips on getting your inspiration and creativity back. If you want. I also know sometimes a person just needs to get something off their chest, which is why this thread is here.

[Aziara]

Did you tell your husband that?
Yes, I did. He felt horrible about saying what he said once he realized how it made me feel. He was trying to be helpful, which makes me feel bad for being pissed at him. I feel a little better right now because I finally stopped fighting the tears and just had a childish tear-tantrum when I was alone in the house this afternoon. I tend to hold all my sad/mad feelings in and give them no outlet until they force their way out. Not a good coping mechanisim, I know. Let's just say I was raised by over-emoting parents, and seeing how much trouble that got them in, I guess I figure hiding my emotions would be better. I need to find healthy ways to express myself. PearlieMae, SurlySeaNymph, thank you. Your posts really help.

[deepblue]

Glad you could come here to start the vent process!

I'm going to do that now... I'm stressing out! Gah, I hate it when something stresses me out because I haven't figured out how to handle it yet.

Let me preface this with: I love dogs. I was raised with dogs. Heck, I was practically raised BY dogs. lol So I'm the first to say that bad dog behaviour isn't their fault, it's the people, and to see that ill-behaved or even dangerous dogs are not the ones at fault. Still, they're animals with teeth meant to tear flesh, and if dangerous, they have to be dealt with.

So. There is this tiny little dog. A doglet of a dog. A minipin mix, I think. She's a menace. She normally lives elsewhere in the complex, but you constantly hear her barking and you can see her chase people. The dog's name is Lady, and her owner constantly barks it at her. Lady! to stop her from chasing people, but dog lovers know that this is not training, this is encouragement to a dog like that.

Thing is, this dog has gotten to the point where she won't chase ME or bark at me, but she does chase and bark at my 4 year old, and I pick up my daughter, and the woman who owns the dog, apologizes, etc. Since the dog wasn't here in my building, it wasn't that big a deal to do this.

BUT. She just moved in DOWN THE HALL.

I'm imagining this. How this is going to go. I'm going to be so fecking angry if this dog is in the hall, if this dog goes after my child again. I'm already angry thinking about it. Tiny dogs aren't tiny to a 4 yr old. My daughter, of course, comes first, and I'm imagining... well just... I'm probably going to have to call animal control and report the animal. I hate to do that, but the woman does NOT take care of this situation. She knows her dog goes after people but claims, ""Oh she'll chase you but if you turn on her, she'll run away." My daughter is afraid, with good cause. The woman lets the dog out without a leash.

I'm going to have to tell her to keep her dog away from my kid, but I have no faith that she will. I have no faith that this dog will be kept inside, or on a leash when outside, and I have a bad feeling about this.

[drucilla]

Okay so I'm sick of holding everything in and I need to vent a bit of it out cause I cant say everything.
My husband and I got into a fight today, surprise there:rolleyes:. He was telling me about this guy at work he got into an argument with, basically my husband asks this guy if he knew where something was and the guy started screaming at him cursing and such he yells back so on and so on. Anyway I pointed out to my husband that he does the same thing to me when I ask him the same question. He explodes. He backhands a can of coke which flys at me, almost hitting me in the head, it sprays all over my clean clothes the wall the couch everything. Then he picks up this glass jar of dip he likes so much and throws it to the floor, it shatters, he starts screaming at me blaming me for it, i clean up both messes and tell him that he has no right to sream and yell at me n curse and especially not to try to intimidate me like that. He says hes not trying to intimidate me, riiight:rolleyes:, he tells me thathe does that to vent. Well i tell him that why should he be able to vent at me like that i NEVER even get to TALK to him when I'm angry, but he gets to throw temper tantrums like a 5yr old?! So we yell he calls me a whore I call him a bastard, which i wanted to say worse but i held back A LOT like I ALWAYS do, then he takes his wallet and both MY AND HIS sets of keys to everything and SPEEDS OFF in the car like a fucking bandit! I hope that he gets into a car accident and dies so i will never have to deal with his shit again and i would be able to get the insurance atleast. End of rant

[Mermaid Jaffa]

@SurlySeaNymph - I know how it is, had another person on facebook who had problems with her dog not listening to her. I realize its not your dog, but its the owner's fault for not training the dog properly.

You ever notice how dog owners just admonish the dog like they're talking to their children? Like they'll say it in their nice voice, "Oh don't do that. Be a good dog".

Like I told the fb lady, in a nice way of course, that as Pack Master, she must deal punishment by force such as using words but in a rough voice, or if worse comes to shove, smack them on the nose with a rolled up newspaper. In the wild, the Alpha dog don't use nice sounds to make each other listen. They bark and bite. So must find a way to do that, humanely of course, to the pet in question.

You know what the reply was from this lady? "I would never hit my dogs. How you would suggest such a thing to be cruel to animals. I use my soothing voice to calm them and talk to them."
In my mind, I was thinking "yea, and that's why they keep peeing on your bed and ripping up your carpets."

[Kaila Mermaid]

Oh, Drucilla...
I am so sorry to hear about what happened. Seeing as this was posted not too long ago, (from when I'm posting at least) are you ok? I hope you weren't hurt. I also hope that things like this don't happen often. Hopefully everything will work out between you two and it's just a spot of tension. After all, relationships are roller coasters with high and low points :) . But, if it gets to the point that you don't feel safe, please don't ignore that. Be careful with you, because you is precious :P , and I hope he comes back with your keys!

[PearlieMae]

Drucilla, get out now. I've been there. It doesn't get better.

[drucilla]

I have no where to go, no college no drivers license no job experience no family and now both of my bank account cards have gone missing i have to think about what would be best for my child and right now it is for me to stay where i am and start college this summer.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

Get out while you still can. Before he decides to vent his anger elsewhere. I'm sure where you live has opportunities for people to start over in life, like get an education, new home, financial support etc. Don't be afraid to stand up to him. Don't forget to cancel your bank cards, unless its a joint bank account, then he has no rights to your money.

[Mermaid Lilium]

I have no where to go, no college no drivers license no job experience no family and now both of my bank account cards have gone missing i have to think about what would be best for my child and right now it is for me to stay where i am and start college this summer.

go to the cops as soon as anything like this happens, even if it's trapping you in a room or verbally intimidating you, if you feel scared or threatened in any way, that is abuse and needs to be logged with the cops. If it continues they will remove him from the house.
You need to report your cards missing/stolen, get a lock-box and put anything like that, birth certs etc in it and hide the box and the key separately.
Yes you need to think about what's best for your kid - if he will throw stuff at your head, what's to stop him from doing the same or worse to your kid? It is not a safe or nurturing environment for your kid.

There is ALWAYS a place to go - the cops can always help you escape the house and help you get to the nearest women's shelter. Many of them will also then help you form a new life because a lot of women who escape abusive situations have 'nothing' either because it's a classic tool of the abuser to strip their victims of power and make them relient on them. The shelter will have space for your child and usually help provide longer-term support and councelling for you and your child.

Do not sufffer alone because you think you have no where else to go.
Do not forgive or accept statements like 'it will never happen again'
You do not have to listen to abusive words or be blamed for things you haven't done.
You also do not have to clean up his shit. Next time he does something like that, he can clean the mess he made while 'venting', maybe he'll realise the extent of his actions while doing so.

Do you have friends you can go to nearby? I know you said you have no family, but many friends will be there for you, much more than you realise, especially if you tell them what is going on.

Is the house/apartment in joint names or just his name? If it's joint names, the cops should be able to remove him from the house, and you should be able to get a restraining order - your best bet for the meantime would be to find a part-time job even if it's scrubbing floors etc, just so that you could take up the payments if he were to be removed. If he's the father he also has a legal duty to pay child-care/maintanance.

also, don't leave your keys anywhere he can easily snatch them up, even if it's keeping them in your pocket xx

[Aziara]

I was the child in this situation growing up. Not a good place to be. My mother also thought that sticking it out was best for me; that an angry father figure was better than none at all. I can't express how strongly I disagree. Having to live in a constant 'survival mode' and wondering if this is the time he completely looses control isn't a good or healthy way to be raised. The fact that you've said you have nowhere to go tells me that he has isolated you to prevent you from leaving him. Be strong and get counseling to help you figure out what to do. (NOT a pastor... they will just tell you divorce is a sin and you should never leave...One of many reason my mom is still with my dad).

[Imogen Finnly]

All of us just really are concerned with your situation, and well being.

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[drucilla]

I'm fine we have been going to counceling together and it has helped a lot, things have been getting better. Last night when he got home we talked about it and discussed different ways we can try to communicate without using escalting behavior and healthy ways we both can vent.

[deepblue]

I hope it works out for you, Drucilla. I haven't been in the situation, but my mom was (with my dad) and it only ended when he nearly killed her and us, so... it's hard for those of us who've been there to think it could get better, since it usually doesn't with people who have violent tendencies. And since your initial post was two days ago, and then this one where you feel it's getting better was yesterday, it's hard to understand how things could be better already.

We're just, like Jayy said, concerned for you. No one wants anyone to get hurt or have to live in fear, or that feeling that you're so stuck that them getting in a car accident is your only way out. It's a terrible way to live.

[PearlieMae]

I'm fine we have been going to counceling together and it has helped a lot, things have been getting better. Last night when he got home we talked about it and discussed different ways we can try to communicate without using escalting behavior and healthy ways we both can vent.

I really hope things can turn around for you! If not, please PLEASE go somewhere safe! Lilium said it all best (it was hard for me to elaborate from my phone) and we can't help but worry.

:hug:

[SeaGlass Siren]

so after reading up about workplace bullying, how do i actually apply this knowledge to a few.. WORKPLACE BULLIES that my husband and i are dealing with?

Here are a few things that this bully likes to do:
spreading malicious rumours, or gossip that is not true
excluding or isolating someone socially
intimidating a person
withholding necessary information or purposefully giving the wrong information
belittling a person's opinions

this is what i have already done:
FIRMLY tell the person that his or her behaviour is not acceptable and ask them to stop. You can ask a supervisor or union member to be with you when you approach the person.
KEEP copies of any letters, memos, e-mails, faxes, etc., received from the person.
REPORT the harassment to the person identified in your workplace policy, your supervisor, or a delegated manager. If your concerns are minimized, proceed to the next level of management. (which is my boss)

Said workplace does not have a union. i seriously hate union, but this... this may be the only thing i need union for. i am an unhappy hypocrite

Suggestions and help would greatly be appreciated.

http://www.ccohs.ca/oshanswers/psychosocial/bullying.html

[AniaR]

File with your h.r. department

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[SeaGlass Siren]

Unfortunately We don't have an hr department. It's a growing family business with one office and "hr" is basically my boss.

I also document, email and date incidences to him but this bully employee is getting way out of hand.

[Merman Dan]

This isn't so much a bitc# as a moan. Folks keep posting the image on Facebook with "If you could sit on this bench for one hour and chat with anyone from the past or present who would it be?". I keep thinking of Marina. After the birth of our third child, my wife miscarried. She was meant to be Marina. After that experience we turned to adoption and have welcomed four wonderful children into our arms. Yet my response to the image was "If I could pick an age it would have to be Marina, as a baby, and I would do all the talking."

One summer I was swimming in the shallows with my two youngest girls. I would swim into the depths, grab a handful of sargassum seaweed, and bring it back to show them all of the creatures that lived in the seaweed; hermit crabs, filefish, shrimp, and more. On one leaf I saw what looked like a fish eyeball. I touched it and it detached from the seaweed. I held it in my hand and it attached. It was a tiny anemone. The anemone stayed on my hand for half an hour before it floated away.

Years later I would start my sargassum sleeve, a tattoo dedicated to my children. Closest to my wrist, in a position I would see whether I was in long sleeves or short, I had an anemone placed. That is there for Marina.

Yeah... I am crying... papa seahorse missing a child I never had the chance to hold, kiss, tickle, or teach. I hope there is an afterlife so that I might finally hold her.

[PearlieMae]

Big hugs to you, Dan! :hug:

[Mermaid Lilium]

This isn't so much a bitc# as a moan. Folks keep posting the image on Facebook with "If you could sit on this bench for one hour and chat with anyone from the past or present who would it be?". I keep thinking of Marina. After the birth of our third child, my wife miscarried. She was meant to be Marina. After that experience we turned to adoption and have welcomed four wonderful children into our arms. Yet my response to the image was "If I could pick an age it would have to be Marina, as a baby, and I would do all the talking."

One summer I was swimming in the shallows with my two youngest girls. I would swim into the depths, grab a handful of sargassum seaweed, and bring it back to show them all of the creatures that lived in the seaweed; hermit crabs, filefish, shrimp, and more. On one leaf I saw what looked like a fish eyeball. I touched it and it detached from the seaweed. I held it in my hand and it attached. It was a tiny anemone. The anemone stayed on my hand for half an hour before it floated away.

Years later I would start my sargassum sleeve, a tattoo dedicated to my children. Closest to my wrist, in a position I would see whether I was in long sleeves or short, I had an anemone placed. That is there for Marina.

Yeah... I am crying... papa seahorse missing a child I never had the chance to hold, kiss, tickle, or teach. I hope there is an afterlife so that I might finally hold her.

*hugs and much love*

[SeaGlass Siren]

This isn't so much a bitc# as a moan. Folks keep posting the image on Facebook with "If you could sit on this bench for one hour and chat with anyone from the past or present who would it be?". I keep thinking of Marina. After the birth of our third child, my wife miscarried. She was meant to be Marina. After that experience we turned to adoption and have welcomed four wonderful children into our arms. Yet my response to the image was "If I could pick an age it would have to be Marina, as a baby, and I would do all the talking."

One summer I was swimming in the shallows with my two youngest girls. I would swim into the depths, grab a handful of sargassum seaweed, and bring it back to show them all of the creatures that lived in the seaweed; hermit crabs, filefish, shrimp, and more. On one leaf I saw what looked like a fish eyeball. I touched it and it detached from the seaweed. I held it in my hand and it attached. It was a tiny anemone. The anemone stayed on my hand for half an hour before it floated away.

Years later I would start my sargassum sleeve, a tattoo dedicated to my children. Closest to my wrist, in a position I would see whether I was in long sleeves or short, I had an anemone placed. That is there for Marina.

Yeah... I am crying... papa seahorse missing a child I never had the chance to hold, kiss, tickle, or teach. I hope there is an afterlife so that I might finally hold her.
Aw Dan.. :( :hug:

[Imogen Finnly]

I'm gonna post here once more. I'm having a hard time with my boyfriend. For a few months now he has been depressed and upset over how he and I don't get to see each other. (We have opposite work schedules.) And no matter how hard I try to make it better he is so stubborn that he won't budge. I'm pretty over this whole situation, but I love him and all, but he doesn't want me to use my days off to see friends, only him. And that's not fair. It seems pretty lame compared to the real issues people post on here but I'm tearing my fucking hair out over this.

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[Winged Mermaid]

Had an ooops nap (what I call a sleep attack). Hubby didn't wake me up becuase, "I needed to sleep" even though we've had this discussion a thousand times that no, I don't. For so many freaking reasons that I've explained a million times since we started dating nearly 11 years ago, so you think he'd get it by now. So now becuase of my various sleeping disorder bullshit, I'm probably not going to be able to get to sleep till literally 8am. :headwall:

[Mermaid Lilium]

next time he falls asleep after his alarm and needs to be somewhere, don't wake him up - let him oversleep and when he complains you can say 'now do you understand why it pisses me off when you leave me to sleep when I need to be up?' 'tis what I'd do lol

[PearlieMae]

I'm gonna post here once more. I'm having a hard time with my boyfriend. For a few months now he has been depressed and upset over how he and I don't get to see each other. (We have opposite work schedules.) And no matter how hard I try to make it better he is so stubborn that he won't budge. I'm pretty over this whole situation, but I love him and all, but he doesn't want me to use my days off to see friends, only him. And that's not fair. It seems pretty lame compared to the real issues people post on here but I'm tearing my fucking hair out over this.

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I don't want to sound flip or mean, but you know what? It's YOUR life. If you want to see your friends, do it. If he succeeds in exerting this control over you for this, next time it'll be something else, and before you know it, he's controlling EVERYTHING you do. Put your foot down and say TOUGH. Be as stubborn as he is and if he doesn't like it, well, don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out, buddy. You can love someone, and you can try and compromise, but when it comes down to brass tacks, are YOU going to let someone have power over YOUR life?

Don't. Been there, done that.

Good luck!

[Imogen Finnly]

Thanks pearlie. I totally know what you're saying. I pretty much laid things out on the table for him and told him what was what.
I've been in abusive controlling relationships before so I know what it feels like to have no power over yourself.

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[Winged Mermaid]

I meant 9am. *looks at clock, bangs head against wall*

[Mermaid Nerinae]

Ugh Iona that sucks!! My husband used to do the same thing to me. He still does, sometimes, because I konk out from having no sleep thanks to a wiggly baby mer, getting up four to six times a night to pee, or a sudden (and quite loud) snore from him. I agree that I might not be getting as much sleep as I like, but I set alarms for naps for a reason.

You have my feels. :<

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[AniaR]

So, I've been wrestling with whether to say something here or not. But I'm super frustrated today so I think I'm gonna.

ON the way home from Merfest, literally on the plane, I leaned back and my back hurt. I reached around thinking something was behind me- and instead I found a painful lump. It freaked me out at first but I figured I twisted something with all that swimming, or maybe I scraped it and didn't remember or whatever. When I got home and had a chrio adjustment she thought the same thing and said it was likely an inflamed joint capsule around my hip. She said with rest and adjustments it would likely go away, ice, that sort of thing.

She's been checking it every week for 6 weeks now. It's gotten progressively worse and about 4-5 times it's size. It's so painful that even the weight of my clothes against it hurts. I cant sleep properly because I wake up in agonizing pain if I touch it. I can't move properly. I took two weeks off from gigs and passed em on to Mimi instead. I cant even explain the pain it's like a very deep burning and I feel like I have a rock under my skin.

My chiro checked it today and told me it was much bigger and it was time to head in to the doctor so I did. At first she thought it was some sort of infected cyst. I'd read up about this- infected cysts and infected joints can happen to people with my illnesses. So she got me up on the table, froze me (which actually hurt soooo freaking bad) and cut me open. Expecting to see an infection and have to drain all kinds of bad stuff and nothing came out :s she even warned us, like it might look/smell gross etc and she kinda pushed on my back and whatever to try to encourage anything to move and nothing did. So then she did the scary doctor "hum... we may have to reconsider this diagnosis." and she tried a few more times and nothing. Then she told me it could be a TUMOUR. She had the courtesy to say benign. But seriously. AHHHH. So I have to wait 3 days til Valentines day and if it still hurts go back in and she's going to try it one more time. And either way, whether the pain goes or stays I have to go for follow up tests because of how it looked I guess.

Ugh. I just. I can't catch a break with my health I really cant. I was so freaking ill through december in and out of the hospital. I try not to be a baby and complain about my health but it reallllly holds me back sometimes. :( I have some big awesome gigs coming up and I hate that I might have to miss them because of this. BUt also, I feel like I only just got back on my feet after being so sick and starting to get back to normal life. I don't wanna go right back to bed :(

[Mermaid Oshun]

I send you healing light and love

[deepblue]

All the healthy thoughts to you, Raina. You're not being a baby. Sometimes a particular thing will build up and drive us crazy, but when it's health? Oh yeah, seriously I'd want to scream, even if just into a pillow. I'd be hitting inanimate objects to get out the frustration. I've been through so much health aggravation myself, and when it piles up and gives you no break... well I hope this turns out to be uber-easy to take care of, and that you are back to a better state of health and no pain, fast.

[Mermaidmechanic]

Raina, i had an uncle that had the same thing! The first 4 times they tried to drain it, it wasnt "ready" (he says it wasnt ripe yet lol) but on the 5th try it finally oozed all its grossness out but it took a while to heal up. So i would say dont kill yourself with worry until the results are in because worry can damage your health too! Sorry it hurts, my uncle was very sensitive in the area too until it was successfully drained. (we used to poke at it when he made a lame pun as punishment! )

[Kaila Mermaid]

I have kinda a small ran I've been wanting to get off my chest, if no one minds :/

I recently found out that my mother was diagnosed with cervical cancer, right after she spent years battling endometriosis with constant pain and surgery. She kept this knowledge to herself for about a week before she told me (I was the first person she told). On top of that, her own mother told both of us that she really didn't care what happened to either of us, whether we lived or died. My grandfather has been a royal horse's ass to her as well, up to the point of wishing to disown her for having different political opinions than theirs. It sickens me to see how people can treat their own children this way. Any time they are drunk (they live with us), we all become verbal and emotional punching bags, including my kid brother that is 12. They asked all of us to live here, I could live elsewhere if I wished. Heck, we all could. I only stay to spare their feelings. But if you claim to love someone and want to be around them, you don't abuse them with emotional and mental head games, ESPECIALLY your daughter that is struggling through an illness that has claimed at least half of our female family members.

I apologize. Rant over. Skwiddy out.

[Seatan]

Well, it looks like mermaiding may have lost me my job. If you've noticed I haven't been around, it's because the freshmen football players who have been bullying me found out about my kids party stuff, found my FinFolk tail unboxing video and spread it all over the school district, and got me in serious crap with the admin. I'm not so sure they will be renewing my teaching contract next year. Beware of who finds out about your hobbies. :(

[Mermaid Mhara]

I feel ridiculous posting this considering some of the people here's real problems but...I has a rant/moan that I need to get off my chest I guess.

So in November I found out that my boyfriend, whom I have been with for three years of my life now...and being only 17 (going on 18 soon!) that's a big chunk of growing up I've gone through with him, had cheated on me. Several times in fact....with four different men. Nothing serious, just casual sex. It disgusted me, and I left him instantly.

But this is so hard :( everyone tells me I'm better off without him, but am I really? When I cut him off completely I get lonely, depressed and even at times suicidal. I feel like I'm trapped in my bedroom day in, day out...with no one there who truly cares. Even when I seek help, it's as though no one listens...and then I reach a stage where I just can't cope and...I do it, I call him. And somehow I feel better. We've *almost* gotten back together twice but what he did hurts me so much. He was there for me through my tremendously horrible school life where I was physically and mentally bullied every day. He was there when I first went into hairdressing and was bullied yet again but this time by a teacher, He helped me when I was in a car accident which led to me losing sleep and having a fear of being in any type of vehicle at night. He was there when my parents split up, leaving me emotionally drained, he was there when my mother tried to commit suicide and ended up in hospital for days. And he was there to see me get my first mermaid tail...to see me audition for a ballet preparation college, to see me follow my true dreams and get back on my feet.

I feel like what he did bypasses everything I've been through, and is the WORST I've had to deal with. My only good thing in life, my only true friend...was a fake. And now I feel like I don't know who he is.

But worst of all...I don't really know who I am. It's been so long since we've grown use to each other that I have no idea who I am without him...I'd grown so dependent on having him there.

So now I'm finding myself. But my Gods is it a lonely path trying to see who you are. I'm trying to not push him out altogether but I'm making certain I only speak to him once a week at the most. I'm just so stressed right now with this, university getting ever closer, exams, finding friends, homework, course work, and finding time to relax and be me. Ugh.

I'm a moaning little freak but I just wanted to vent I guess.

[Mermaid Mhara]

Well, it looks like mermaiding may have lost me my job. If you've noticed I haven't been around, it's because the freshmen football players who have been bullying me found out about my kids party stuff, found my FinFolk tail unboxing video and spread it all over the school district, and got me in serious crap with the admin. I'm not so sure they will be renewing my teaching contract next year. Beware of who finds out about your hobbies. :(

I'm just curious but...is that bad? Why would they not renew your contract over you being a Mermaid? Surely that's discrimination of some sort...?

So long as your work life and personal life don't mix, I don't see why it's such a big deal. You didn't ask for the video to go round the district, you didn't ask the football jerks to bully you. Wow this is horrible :( I'm so sorry for you. If you need anyone to rant at drop me a mail I'd be happy to listen.

[Miyu]

OMG Seavanna What?!? :O_o: That's so freaking not cool! Have you alerted your employers to the fact that these kids were harassing you? They have to take some responsibility for that, as there's only so much you can do about kids like that!

And you need to ask your employers what their basis for their problem with your hobby is... They should have absolutely no reason to not renew your contract for such a benign hobby - It's not like you're nude modelling or anything! Actually, a goodly portion of the Renfaire folks I know who work there every year are either currently teachers (off-season in summer!) or retired teachers. Are they trying to say that people shouldn't, you know, be individuals or something?!? If they do end up not renewing your contract, I would personally contact some local media and perhaps reach out to some of the supportive parents... But that's just me :P




As for all the folks either diagnosed with cancer or possibly will be... I've known so many people to get diagnosed recently, and one passed away last year. This stuff is seriously worrying me, especially now that I'll be frequenting the indoor pool - all that chlorine! So I've really been making an effort to not only try to "detoxify" on a regular basis through kelp, turmeric, and all the other foods I have that help your body fight cancer (I do research. All day. I am seriously, literally addicted to researching things.), but I'm also trying to minimize the amount of toxins in my environment - I've cut way down on the use of plastic, I try to buy things in glass jars vs. canned, not eating anything with those freaky artificial dyes in them, and seriously reading the labels of everything and researching what all is in things.

(And Raina, I'm praying for you that yours is just a cyst - I know from experience a really stubborn cyst can look really disturbing and take weeks, sometimes months, to be "ripe" - LOL - to extract.)

[Miyu]

Merman Vaughan, I know just how you feel... I made the mistake of getting married to a cheater and wasting several years of my early "adulthood" (LOL) on him, and still every day I think of how much of my life was formed around him because he was there for that period... He's tried getting back together with me since I left, and gets all upset that I keep saying no, but I'm not the one who cheated, and he really messed me up in the head with that and all his lies.

So, years later, I've gone through a few more boyfriends, and they all tried to make me into what they wanted... I'm just lucky I finally found someone who let me (and helped me) find myself, FOR myself. I've had to learn not to base my self-worth and -definition on someone else, and that took me a while (which is probably because of my childhood, long backstory, blah blah), but now that I have, I feel more "free to be me".

Also, this song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moSFlvxnbgk

[deepblue]

Well, it looks like mermaiding may have lost me my job. If you've noticed I haven't been around, it's because the freshmen football players who have been bullying me found out about my kids party stuff, found my FinFolk tail unboxing video and spread it all over the school district, and got me in serious crap with the admin. I'm not so sure they will be renewing my teaching contract next year. Beware of who finds out about your hobbies. :(

That's horrible. Not just that there are kids who decided they needed to do that, but that it got YOU in trouble with admin. I can't personally imagine how kids parties and mermaiding could reflect poorly on you at all. If anything, I'd think they'd see it as positive! Wow. I think all of us here are going to wonder what on earth they found wrong with any of it. You have a personal life outside of teaching, and what's public is not in any way inappropriate.... that's just baffling.


I feel ridiculous posting this considering some of the people here's real problems but...I has a rant/moan that I need to get off my chest I guess.

So in November I found out that my boyfriend, whom I have been with for three years of my life now...and being only 17 (going on 18 soon!) that's a big chunk of growing up I've gone through with him, had cheated on me. Several times in fact....with four different men. Nothing serious, just casual sex. It disgusted me, and I left him instantly.
~snip~

I'm a moaning little freak but I just wanted to vent I guess.

Oh, Vaughn. I am so sorry, and I think your vent is just as worthy as any others here. You were right to leave him. I don't know why, but to me, people who cheat repeatedly for just sex... it's just the worst. He exposed you to the risk of disease, betrayed you, over and over, and all for.. nothing? Just sex? And though it seemed like he was your one true friend, or your best friend, they do this and suddenly, you have to accept that they are not your friend at all and never were. You'll end up doubting your own judgment and questioning everything you do in regard to relationships for awhile, probably.

I think you've taken great first steps in getting to know yourself, being here is part of that. But you know... there is a way of looking at this kind of breakup. It's like getting over an addiction- even though it did not start as one- and every time you see him, the withdrawal will be more difficult. If you don't let yourself grieve the relationship and what you thought you had, every time you see him is like starting over. You need to give yourself the time that takes. You've probably never been through this before, so forgive my unsolicited advice, but I have been through it a couple times- they weren't cheaters but the pain they caused by the betrayal was bad enough. And only time heals this kind of wound. Every time you see him again, you have to start over. Eventually, when you're totally over him or at least have faith in yourself again, then perhaps seeing him won't rip the wound open again.

Good luck, merman Vaughn. <3 All the healing heart mojo to you.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

That sucks! How people don't understand what hobbies are... Not all of us are into knitting and stamp collecting!

[Echidna]

Wishing lots of strength for all those with health issues.

Sadly, crap has a tendency of piling up.
And being diagnosed with more and more stuff on top of the crap you already have is a terrible burden.

I hope you will be alright again!

[Merman Dan]

Well, it looks like mermaiding may have lost me my job. If you've noticed I haven't been around, it's because the freshmen football players who have been bullying me found out about my kids party stuff, found my FinFolk tail unboxing video and spread it all over the school district, and got me in serious crap with the admin. I'm not so sure they will be renewing my teaching contract next year. Beware of who finds out about your hobbies. :(

Ouch. :( That reminds me of the Brony who was fired simply for being a Brony. Here is an article (http://www.lifeofthelaw.org/can-i-be-fired-for-being-a-brony-yes-among-a-million-other-things/) where a lawyer discusses the legality of that situation. It's an interesting albeit sobering reminder that people can be legally dismissed for no reason whatsoever. Granted, I also recall the many cases where teachers have been dismissed for appearing scantily-clad on their Facebook pages.

Would any of these freshmen have been in the class that disrespected the substitute teacher, recently? Perhaps they are retaliating for having to write an apology for their actions?

And to clarify - football players?!? Don't they dress up in costumes (uniforms... same same) when partaking of their favorite pastime?

Sports fans often dress in ridiculous attire when attending games. Civil War reenactors go to elaborate ends, to dress appropriately for their hobby of choice. Would someone who dresses up for a Renaissance Faire be in danger of termination if their employer had no sense of imagination?

What a world... what a world.

[SeaGlass Siren]

^ THAT.

[WillowAnne]

I'm just curious but...is that bad? Why would they not renew your contract over you being a Mermaid? Surely that's discrimination of some sort...?

So long as your work life and personal life don't mix, I don't see why it's such a big deal. You didn't ask for the video to go round the district, you didn't ask the football jerks to bully you. Wow this is horrible :( I'm so sorry for you. If you need anyone to rant at drop me a mail I'd be happy to listen.

Ugh. Seavanna, that SUCKS. My kiddos know about my obsession, but I can see where, if you've had issues with some kiddos, that they could try to use this against you. My question is how are you in crap with your admin? I mean, it's not like you posted anything sexual, or offensive, etc. It is a HOBBY for pete's sake.

Unfortunately, with teaching, if you do not have tenure they are not required to give a reason as to why they are not renewing your contract. I was transferred to another school and they didn't have to give me a reason, but they did anyway--it was because we lost over 200 students and I was the most recently hired teacher. I would assume that it's the same way where Seavanna is.

This REALLY stinks. I had a really bad group of kiddos my 2nd year of teaching (cussing me out and shoving desks at me, for example), and instead of offering support, my administration blamed me and put me on an "assistance plan". and then the next year they praised me for being such an "awesome" teacher when I got a new group of kiddos.

Seavanna, if you want to talk, let me know! If you want to talk on here or facebook (if you have one), I'm willing. I went through a pretty rough year and (barely) came out alive.

[Mermaid Muir]

I hate being forced to be someone else and have to have the true me hidden behind closed doors.

[SeaGlass Siren]

Allie, let it go, let it go! Turn away and slam the door!

[Mermaid Adriel]

Well, it looks like mermaiding may have lost me my job. If you've noticed I haven't been around, it's because the freshmen football players who have been bullying me found out about my kids party stuff, found my FinFolk tail unboxing video and spread it all over the school district, and got me in serious crap with the admin. I'm not so sure they will be renewing my teaching contract next year. Beware of who finds out about your hobbies. :(

that sucks :( I hope things will be better.
However, I think they're just jealous of your hobby.

[SeaGlass Siren]

i dont think it's jealousy, its more like "picking on someone because youre just an asshole." because i'm 100% certain that they dont want to be seen in a tail


"LOL OMG LOOK HOW CHILDISH THIS IS, SHE THINKS SHE'S A MERMAID LOLOL OMGSOGAY *Insert other sexist, childish, homophobic, & incomprehensible gibberish here*
HASHTAGLAMEHASHTAGHASHTAGHOWOLDDOESSHETHINKSHEIS"

ok how about hashtagshutthefuckup.

[SeaGlass Siren]

seriously i hate assholes like that. seavanna, you could move up to canada! i had an art teacher at my highschool who's an ARGOS cheerleader! you'd get to be a mermaid AND be a teacher up here. edit: and you'd be a second raina :P teacher/mermaid

[Imogen Finnly]

I seriously don't think they have grounds to terminate you. They don't really have grounds in my opinion. This is what you do on your free days as a hobby, I mean its harmless and give you cash from the parties.
If you were say a porn star on days off or a drug dealer then I would get where they are coming from, but being a mermaid is nothing near those two things.
If they do fire you, I'm sure you could sue for it, take it to the media. So on. I mean honestly. Kids now are more terrible than I ever remember them being.

Sent from my C5155 using Tapatalk

[SeaGlass Siren]

^amen to that. they get worse every year. back in my day *omg i cant believe i just said that*

we were fucking terrified of our teachers! we were loud, yeah but they ruled our grades with an iron fist. and none of the parents being all like "why did you give my kid so low a grade?" now everyone questions the teacher? like wtf.

[Imogen Finnly]

Yea I mean I know teachers who say their kids are pure evil and never listen, if these kids are the ones taking care of me when I'm old, id rather die young.
Like in high school we had a teacher who was a teacher who was a dealer for years and she used to give kids an A if they gave her drugs. She finally got fired when the principle caught her, but she was strung out and drunk for years before they fired her.

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[SeaGlass Siren]

holy shit. you kinda have to wonder how the kids are being raised at home. if it isnt the parents, its the kids acting up.

[Imogen Finnly]

Yeah my high school was nuts some times. I think it has to be either parents that don't care or are so oblivious to what their kids actually do they assume everythings okay. Thank god my parents weren't stupid.

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[SeaGlass Siren]

there's a saying in vietnamese that my parents kept telling me; respect your teachers, they take time out of their schedule to teach children how to be smart, and they teach you how to grow and be a better person for tomorrow.

this want part of it: but if teacher hits you, tell the principal.

[PearlieMae]

Vaughn, Surly Sea Nymph said all the things I wanted to say, but much more eloquently that I could have!

People come and go from your life for a reason. Ask yourself 'What am I supposed to learn from this person/relationship/experience?' And when you can honestly answer that question, you won't have to repeat that particular scenario and can move forward with your life.

Some people are a hard lesson to learn.

:hug:

[Mermaid Muir]

Vaughn, Surly Sea Nymph said all the things I wanted to say, but much more eloquently that I could have!

People come and go from your life for a reason. Ask yourself 'What am I supposed to learn from this person/relationship/experience?' And when you can honestly answer that question, you won't have to repeat that particular scenario and can move forward with your life.

Some people are a hard lesson to learn.

:hug:

You are so right! I had an experience where I had to go through this and even though I learned from the experience, I am glad I got away from that school

[deepblue]

Family crap is the worst.

Dealing with my mother in her insomniac fits is like dealing with a drunk, only worse, because she's not drunk. But still, when someone does something over and over, and it's totally predictable, and each time they end up apologizing, the horrible things said were already said, and I just cannot deal with this anymore. Esp when I deserve none of it. If I was hearing honest things about myself, even if it were hard to hear, I'd be open to it. That's how I evolve. Honest self-disclosure. But this? It would be allowing myself to be abused to put up with it.

And she knows she's doing it. She told me in her last 'apology' that she was sorry, she guesses it's just her resentment built up, but it 's in the past and she should let it go. Seriously. She resents me. Me? What the hell have I done? I've been wracking my brain trying to figure out in what way this is possible, and you know what? It's not. I haven't done anything worthy of resentment. I'm the only daughter who hasn't ripped into her, disrespected her, etc. I'm the nice one- the one who tells her I forgive her for the things we went through because she stayed with my dad so long, I'm the one who tells her I understand, who knows how easily she is hurt, who has listened as she cries about the way my sisters have treated her. If there is any resentment to be had, it would belong to my sisters and I and be against her.

And I get this crap... she does not do this to my sisters because she knows they'd destroy her for it. I'm done. Other than if I need a sitter I can trust with my daughter, my relationship with this woman is over. I just need to figure out how to get groceries and appts with no car, because public transpo doesn't go everywhere and is not an option for some things. I don't want to borrow hers anymore.

But it hurts, so bad, in my heart. All the depression I've ever dealt with and all the heart break anyone ever does, all the pain in the past, none of it really equals this. Thanks, mom. Hope you're happy you finally drove me away, too.

[Echidna]

I'm the only daughter who hasn't ripped into her, disrespected her, etc. I'm the nice one
it's often the nice, kind, forgiving people who get all the resentment, because the abusers think they can get away with it there.
in such cases, it's better to stop being nice and kind to people who obviously don't deserve it.

but I know it hurts.
especially when said people, who know how to push buttons, will then rage and tell you how cold and cruel you are, because you stopped being nice and forgiving all of a sudden :p

[deepblue]

^I agree. I most certainly have stopped at this point. I'm always so concerned about her pain- I tend to be very concerned with suffering in general, it's just a thing with me, and usually not a bad thing. But concern for myself must come first.

[SeaGlass Siren]

being betrayed by family hurts so much. how low do you have to be to lie to your own daughter for a "birthday present" and then yell at her for picking out the wrong bday gift when she's just going to regift it behind you back? so many things wrong with this scenario

basically my mother told me to get a 300 dollar netbook (which is outdated so they dont sell anymore) so i buy an adequate sized nice (white because racist towards black anything wtf??) laptop, 3 year warranty for the works because she wanted a nice laptop for her birthday. when i bring it home my sister asked how much? i say 700 including the carrier case. she then proceeds to tell me she heard she was gonna regift it got my snake-viper family. they lie to get money out of us and they never work a day in their life. so we're basically their crutch. WELL. MOTHER WAS ALWAYS COMPLAINING about them about how they lie to get money out of us. but now she turns around and doe the same thing to me.

when my mom looked at it she was like omg why so much money?? and then i asked her if she was going to regift it or use it because if it was supposed to be a birthday gift, she's supposed to keep it, not give away my hardearned money to some bitch i dont even talk to. so then she starts yelling at me for even buying such an expensive laptop.

UH HELLO? did she not realize that she just LIED to me? if she had told me the truth that it was gonna be a regift i wouldnt mind but wtf my HUSBAND chipped in to the laptop too because it was supposed to be birthday gift.
i'm feeling o upset and hurt.. and betrayed to much. how can my own mother do this to me? her other two daughters dont do jack shit in this house' no chores, no bill paying contributions.. and I'M the one who gets treated like shit. wtf. i have worked hard all my life. i sacrificed my childhood for this woman... i stopped going out with friends, i only focused on school work, now i'm just straight working. all the while having to babysit my neice while her mother and my younger sister whore themselves for fun. WHAT THE FUCK.

this has happened before when she wanted a clinique bonus because it was on sale and there was a special. and she flat out yelled at me because i didnt buy the right sized bottle. LIKE WTF she gave me the ad for the items IT WAS IN THE FUCKING AD.

i just feel so under appreciated right now, and is constantly treated like garbage.

[Mermaid_Kathrine]

I don't mean to throw my problems all over you guys but I don't really have anyone to talk to, to vent about this. So my only friend has been terrible to me lately. And I've never spoken a mean word to him ever. But I'm known to not stick up for myself and practically let people run over me,but the past week he has called me a Bitch, and other awful names. And when he was being rude to me and was hurting my feelings I told him to hush. I actually very politely said hush. And he said F**K YOU to me. Now this is when I broke I called him out on his crap. And he said sorry after wards but I absolutely hate when people take stuff out on you when you've done nothing wrong towards them. He said it was because he was in a mood. I told just because your in a mood does not mean you have permission to use me as a punching bag.


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[Mermaid Ellowyn]

I don't mean to throw my problems all over you guys but I don't really have anyone to talk to, to vent about this. So my only friend has been terrible to me lately. And I've never spoken a mean word to him ever. But I'm known to not stick up for myself and practically let people run over me,but the past week he has called me a Bitch, and other awful names. And when he was being rude to me and was hurting my feelings I told him to hush. I actually very politely said hush. And he said F**K YOU to me. Now this is when I broke I called him out on his crap. And he said sorry after wards but I absolutely hate when people take stuff out on you when you've done nothing wrong towards them. He said it was because he was in a mood. I told just because your in a mood does not mean you have permission to use me as a punching bag.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD

Good for you for standing up for yourself, hun. Also, try not to take his words personally - they were most likely a reflection of his mood or character, not yours.

[Mermaid_Kathrine]

I know but still it was wrong of him to be like that with me when I didn't do anything to deserve it


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[PearlieMae]

I know but still it was wrong of him to be like that with me when I didn't do anything to deserve it


It is time to cut that fool loose. You might not see it, but you are on the shitty side of an abusive relationship. "It's not his fault, he was in a mood, he apologized, promised it would never happen again..." I can't tell you how many battered women I've worked with try and justify this kind of behavior. It doesnt have to be a spouse or significant other, friends and family members can be abusive, too. Verbal abuse is as damaging as physical and you need to put some distance between you and this person immediately. Don't worry about hurting his feelings, that is NOT your problem.

This is your life. People can't take advantage of you without your permission.

[Mermaid_Kathrine]

I know and I think I'll stop talking to him. Besides I can make other friends, friends who would treat me as they would want to be treated.


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[Mermaid Ellowyn]

I know and I think I'll stop talking to him. Besides I can make other friends, friends who would treat me as they would want to be treated.


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Putting my own two cents in here - friends should treat you the way you want to be treated.

[Mermaid_Kathrine]

You're right


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[deepblue]

It's been a month since my friend killed himself, and that's been hard enough to deal with. His memorial only made it harder, and had I known, I wouldn't have gone.

But why my mother is choosing to use this time to be a total nutter is beyond me. She seems to have decided to strike out at me, and I do not know why.

A few weeks ago, in front of my child, she responded to my happiness over how awesome my relationship is with, "Well it hasn't been long enough that he's serious. And when he decides he wants to have kids... he knows you'll be okay, because you have (my daughter)."

WTF. And now she's gotten personal, and her so called apology included mentioning that I'm being sensitive, and she's surprised because I've been strong and steady for so long.

That is some manipulative bullshit right there. And its' on top of stuff I mentioned earlier, and so much I haven't gone into.

So what do people do? She's a good grandma but as for being my mother, I learned a while ago I can't depend on her for anything. So what do people do? I don't want to hear from her. But my daughter loves her grandma, and she's been basically good to her. My mom is not seeing what she does as hurtful, and claims I'm responsible for my own reaction to her words, even though when my sister said that to her, she saw that's bs.

I'm so sick of my crazy family. I'm the only one who's made progress, gone to years of therapy to escape the cycle of emotional and mental crap that plagues us, and I'm not about to let my crazy, neurotic mother bring me down to her level.

But I'm at a loss. I want her to leave me alone. She calls anyway. She'll show up here, I guarantee it.

[SeaGlass Siren]

My mom is th same way. She's a manipulative bitch. And dad is the one who says I need therapy because she emotionally abuses me as says I'm a worthless good for nothing

Sorry mom I'm not exactly like you who's unemployed and depends on others for money. Jesus

[deepblue]

The thing that's hardest about this is that she hasn't always been this way. She was with my sis who is in another state now, so I get the feeling she's switched her focus to me.

I'm just so over it, I have a good life I've worked very hard for. People, I don't care who they are, who are focused on this shitty way of living, one that ruins their own lives, need not be part of it.

[Vixy]

I have tried to get over my ex, for a while I think I'm doing well and making headway until I have to see him again in training. Then my heart goes into overdrive and I'm right back to square one. I spoke to another of the group and he mentioned that their opinion on him has gone down, shocked and surprised at what he has done. Some are disgusted, most think he's scared as they mentioned he keeps glancing me, giving a smile before looking away when I turn my head his way.

Denying feelings, being a coward to admit them I guess but it causes me hurt.

[telzey.amberdon]

Vixy, it took time to be with one person, it takes time to be without.

[SeaGlass Siren]

i hate grown salesmen who act like spoiled princesses when things don't go their way because the female admin puts them in their place. geez. the sexism in this office is just TOO. DAMN. HIGH.

[Mermaid Adriel]

So, my grandpa is passing (he's almost 88) and my dad's brothers want to dialyse him. They must know that it's useless, because in his situation he can die right now. Dialysis is pain, so let him die with dignity!

[PearlieMae]

Claudia, I'm so sorry your grandfather is dying. It's hard to let someone go, especially if technology can keep them going...I'm sorry your uncles don't see that dialysis is destroying his quality of life when he is so near the end.

I hope things work out for the best. :hug:

[deepblue]

THANKS A LOT to my mom's doctor for making a racist remark while angrily addressing her very serious weight issue. That always helps someone who weighs twice what they should find the courage to make changes that she's been struggling with since a very traumatic event 30 years ago. NOT. Also, you got the race wrong, and while it makes it no better or worse, it certainly makes you more laughable.

My mom has her issues, she drives me crazy, but this will not help!!

[Starfrit]

You know that feeling like you're speeding downhill with your brakes cut and the only thing waiting for you at the bottom is a giant brick wall to crash and burn into? Yeah, that's kind of how I'm feeling lately.

Not only have my depression and anxiety been getting worse lately-- to the point where I'm starting to feel like it's getting out of control now and my doctor's sending me to a help clinic next week as an "urgent case"-- but I'm starting to realize that I really am just genuinely unhappy with where I am in my life in regards to my job, my education, and what feels like a total lack of a stable future. It's really overwhelming.

I do third-shift at a gas station. It's an alright job, I guess, I at least get 40-hour weeks and it's a fairly stable position, but I'm so done with this minimum-wage customer service tillmonkey bullshit. Even with the 40-hour weeks at this job I'm still having trouble even being able to afford my rent each month. I owe my boyfriend (who I live with) almost $400 because he's been covering for me the last couple of months on my share of the rent, and I feel like crap every time he does because I want to pay him back every cent.

The worst part is, all of my frustrations and anxieties lately all boil down to one thing: Money. I need to take time off to focus on my mental health, but I can't because I literally can't afford to take the time off. It comes down to either getting myself better, or keeping a roof over my head. How the fuck am I supposed to make a decision like this? Everybody says useless shit like "You need to put yourself first!" but how do I even do that in this instance?

I can't take any "mental health days" off work to keep myself from just jumping in front of traffic and ending it all, and because I'm in such a shitty financial situation right now I've barely eaten in the last two, almost three weeks, which is causing me to start getting physically ill, and the stress from being at work when I'm not really in the physical/mental condition to be there is only exacerbating my depression, which is sucking away all of the motivation and inspiration from literally anything I want to do. On my days off I'm functioning long enough to check MerNetwork and Facebook, occasionally LiveJournal, and then I'm back in bed, hiding under the sheets and just waiting for the world to end or for everything to just magically get better-- which it never does.

I want to find a better-paying job doing what I love-- I want to work with animals. Working at a vet, shelter, on a fuckin' farm shoveling out pens, literally anything. I want to work at a job where I can focus my attention on helping animals and not have to deal with stupid, ignorant, asshole people to the extent I've had to with every other stupid retail job I've had to put up with up to this point. I mean, at least when an animal decides to be a dick it's considered charming.

But I don't even get call backs from freaking pet shops because nobody will look at me because I don't have any sort of education in the field; I have some work experience helping out at my sister's grooming salon, but that's literally it, and I haven't even done that in years. So nobody will look at me because I don't have experience, I can't get experience because I don't have an education, I don't have an education because I can't afford to drop thirteen grand on a vet program because every cent I make goes straight to rent and bills, which I can barely afford as it is!

I stare at pictures and videos of mermaids and cosplayers and LARPers and all this other fantasy shit on the internet and despite how badly I wish I could do the same, all it does at the end of the day is just make me feel ten times worse because ultimately the only reason I want to do any of it is because it would give me an excuse to just... not be me for a while. I could be Starfrit the Mermaid or something and not have to give a single flying fuck about Tieri the useless gas-pumping loser. But in the end I can't do any of it because I can't afford the materials and lack the talent to do it myself, I'm an idiot for even thinking I can commission someone for things like that when I can't even afford to feed myself and even if I did go ahead with it, where would I go? The beaches here are fuckin' freezing pretty much single day of the year, I'd get maybe a month out of using a mermaid tail over the course of a year and even then I'd be too self-conscious to go out in public with it because as much as I wish I could do it, I crack completely under pressure when I do something to draw attention to myself.

Everything I want to do feels completely out of my reach. I'm stuck on this stupid island with zero opportunity to do anything and I can't leave because it requires money I don't have and can't get. I want to get out and hang out with people with similar interests as me, but I can't because they're not here and I don't know where to even start looking when it comes to this stuff. I can't exactly post "Hey who wants to be a mermaid with me?" on my Facebook wall without my friends and family thinking I'm some kind of a lunatic or telling me to just grow up and get a grip on reality.

IDK, IDK, I'm just really frustrated and needed a place to vent. I really wasn't expecting it to get this long, to be honest, that just kind of happened.

[Mermaid Dottie]

I really wish I was in Canada right now. I would run over to your house right now, and duct tape your legs so I could make you a tail. That sucks so bad, and I wish I could fix it for you.

Sent from my C6916 using Tapatalk

[Mirabelle le Mergirl]

Holy macarel! I hate it when girls say that my sense of style is stupid. Yeah, I wear green and blue lippie ALL THE TIME, but why you gotta be so mean?! And when they decide to buy the same things as me when I wear it, upsets me so ;(

[Mirabelle le Mergirl]

Just remember that someone, like your boyfriend, really does love you. Never give up! I LOVE YOU, for starters!!! EVERYONE IN THIS FORUM LOVES YOU!!! You are amazing, because you are coping with your life. Keep going!
Love, Mirabelle le Mergirl

[Aperture_Platypus]

So, the bastards who live on the corner of my street never clear their sidewalk. It snowed last night, so there was a huge sheet of ice covered by a couple inches of powder. I slipped and landed flat on my back. I'm 6'3" so it was a long fall onto ice and concrete. I'm at the office and can barely move my spine.

[Starfrit]

Mirabelle and Dottie: Thanks, guys. <3 After I posted that rant yesterday my boyfriend came home and we talked about it all, and I'm feeling a lot better today. It really helps knowing that there are people out there who care for me. Y'all are wonderful!

Aperture Platypus: Yikes! D: Hopefully your back isn't too injured! If you notice that the stiffness isn't gone over the next couple of days, DEFINITELY see a doctor! I fell off a ladder at my last job and messed up my back pretty bad, but thought it was nothing serious and just decided to "walk it off" for a week... All that did was make it worse and I ended up having to take a month off from work on medical leave for physiotherapy because my back and shoulder were so screwed up. :(

[Mermaid Adriel]

Thanks Pearlie. Luckily, the dialysis is working but I wanted what was good for him... however, the important thing is that he continues living without suffering...

[Mermaid Tula]

So I need to vent. This is probably going to be a bit long. So I apologize early on for the length.

One of my closest friends (so close she's called aunt to my daughter) is having a complete and total relationship meltdown. I was friends with her boyfriend before I knew her, but over the last few years, I've gotten super close to her and a little more distant towards him. Mostly its been in the last few months that I've watched their relationship start to dissolve. It started out with a whirlwind relationship between them, then they started to settle in, then within this last year, things started to get rough. Instead of being the awesome guy I've known for quite some time, he's changed into an inconsiderate jerk. He started to become distant and would straight up start yelling at her for stupid reasons. It got to the point that she was talking about kicking him out and leaving him. Well, they decided to try to work it out and it started to feel like things were working out. Shit happened, and the relationship turned into an 'open' relationship because she wanted him to be happy. He wound up sleeping with another girl, but he came to the conclusion that he didn't enjoy that and felt like he cheated, even though they're in an open relationship. He went to the other girls place yesterday pretty much to say either they work things out with his first girlfriend (my friend) or he would have to break up with her (the new girl). That was the plan. Well last night he came back home, started to freak out again for no reason, told my friend that she was shit (paraphrasing there). She called me up at almost midnight last night, sobbing, asking me to come get her. I immediately started getting dressed, had my hubby ready to start the car when I got another call from her, letting me know that she was going to take a sleeping pill to just try to go to sleep. I wound up talking to her for almost an hour last night during that call, let her know that we're here for her, and we'll do what ever we can to help, but that her relationship was turning severely toxic, and it would be best to just end it.

I just feel so helpless, even though I'm trying my hardest to help. I know I'm doing more than most, being a shoulder to cry on, and ear to listen, and a reasonable mind to help her figure out some things as well as having a place she can come to when need be. I just wish I could do more. She's working on getting on disability because her spine is severely messed up and she can't get around very easily. He hasn't been helping at all. (No cleaning, no job, nothing. If not for her, he'd be homeless.)

My biggest issue is they have depression (he's bipolar, she has depression) and depression feeds off of other depression. I've been trying to help and I also have depression, so trying to help is causing my depression to get worse too. I've been set off by the littlest things since last night. I was supposed to go swimming with another friend today, but shit happened (as it always does for me or so it feels) and swimming was cancelled. That frustrated me beyond words for the most part because I was so excited to do something fun and relaxing today.

BLERG. Why do I have to be so caring towards others? I should just withdraw and become a hermit. (even though I'm sure I'd go nuts from being lonely since I'm an extrovert.)

anyway. Thanks for letting me vent.

[PearlieMae]

All you can do is be there for your friend when she needs you. She needs to get out of that toxic relational, but she has to do that. That's her journey. I'm sorry it's affecting you so!

[Mermaid Tula]

Thanks Pearlie <3 I'll try to keep strong for not only her, but for myself as well.

[Merman Arion]

I need to vent.

This is pretty much what I feel about stupid threads made because some people can't just make a fucking proper research on the internet before asking. Some are just kids, some are teens, some adults but it's not personal.
It just baffles me every - single - time that they can't take a moment to do their homework first. :headwall: :gah:

http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2014-03/enhanced/webdr06/10/22/anigif_enhanced-7095-1394503490-10.gif

http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2014-03/enhanced/webdr07/10/22/anigif_enhanced-6543-1394504514-21.gif

http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2014-03/enhanced/webdr06/10/21/anigif_enhanced-7598-1394502372-2.gif

[PearlieMae]

EXACTLY!

I want to help when people get stuck, but I am NOT going to spoonfeed people if they can't even be bothered to look up the info first! :google it:

[Merman Arion]

EXACTLY!

I want to help when people get stuck, but I am NOT going to spoonfeed people if they can't even be bothered to look up the info first! :google it:

TOTALLY !!! :highfive:

What I wanna say to them :

http://oi54.tinypic.com/2j41xrm.jpg

[Aperture_Platypus]

I think hitting my coworker over the head with a tire iron would make me feel better. I work in insurance making employee benefit plans for clients. They want me to remake the shitty images on the covers and make them all uniform. Usually not a problem. What IS the problem is that these covers are made up of 8-10 images all pieced together quite poorly instead of 1 image like it should be. I am not allowed to import anything to Photoshop and they want me to work in MS Word, the bane of all graphic designers. The worst is when I'm having trouble making things fit in Word, one smarmy little shit named Jim says, "Well I thought you were good at this stuff." Just give me a crowbar, a shovel, 10 acres and 20 minutes. Seriously, I am going to snap, just a matter of when.

[Marlin]

@ Platypus- That post = pure awesome.

We should be friends :D

[Winged Mermaid]

Just venting a bit.. Learned a lesson. No more fluke up and chest up together photos for group pics. Yeah it shows the top and tail, but it’s kind of a precarious position. Kid bumped my fluke during one yesterday. I caught it, as to not smack 5+ other kids with said fluke, but turns out it badly hurt my back doing so. :/ Have a gig in 3 days, hope my back heals up enough before then to do it. Blargh -_-

[PearlieMae]

Oh no! Do you have a yoga ball to stretch your back? Chiropractor? Whiskey and Vicodin? ;)Feel better!

[Mermaid Adriel]

I'm sorry to hear this, Iona... i hope you'll get better soon <3

[Kelphinea_Kelp]

I hate it when older people immediately think they know more than you do and speak to you in
a condescending manner. It's also annoying when older people demand respect just because
they're older while they treat you like utter shit.
When you beat them in an argument and they say "You just don't understand right now, you will
when you're older" and junk like that -__-


Omg this is SO true..... But the same can be said for younger people to.. Because i REALLY have a HUGE issue with people who are my age and carry them selves with their noses in the air, and seem to act all knowing and publicly helpful, but then they down grade you or speak to you in a condescending tone or treat you as if your feelings opinions or ideas don't matter. It's like they somehow HAVE to be in control and HAVE to have the spotlight, and they attack you if you show signs of being strong, because they see you as some sort of threat with out thinking about it.
It prob comes from that persons own personal battles with insecurity issues but.. it's NONE the less annoying, and its not that much different then what you spoke about.

[Winged Mermaid]

Thanks Pearlie and Claudia! I'm actually waiting on a referral to go through for an orthopedic surgeon cause I have chronic back issues. I can't afford chiro and massage, which would help so much, and insurance won't cover it. So imma try and get a referral for physical therapy for my back from the orthopedic dr. Until then, I might need those pain meds I've been saving :P and I'm also glued to my heating pad lol

[Nicky-Katz]

@ Aperture Platypus: use LaTeX instead! And send all your coworkers your source code :D

[AniaR]

I have found adding that "pose" to my workout has helped me prepare better for doing that pose for photos. It's a hard one to do just out of the blue especially with such wide monofins because they mess so much with your centre of gravity,

[Winged Mermaid]

Good suggestion! Doesn't help that the fluke is nearly 20lbs and I have a bad back :P Time to add in some mermaid yoga!

[OrcaMatt]

@ Aperture Platypus: use LaTeX instead! And send all your coworkers your source code :DI do my resume in LaTeX...it looks pretty sweet.

[Nicky-Katz]

@ Orca Matt: I write everything in TeX: letters, my CV, my homework for the university, and even presentation slides. Best thing ever :D There is no way your document will look odd somewhere else and it is always compiled the best way and no more manual editing of like a million of things. It's all done with little effort.

[Mermaid Sirena]

This has irritated me for a long time. Why does it seem like the vast majority of talented people do nothing with their lives? I'm a graphic designer & an artist, I have a TON of creative friends some of whom could easily support themselves by creating and selling their work online. I'm not just saying that cause I'm their friend I'm actually really judgmental of peoples artistic abilities as I look at so much of it. If I had the skills they had I would do so much with it and it would be so awesome, but they don't do anything. If they were doing something else with their lives that made them happy then it'd be whatever, but they aren't. They are living their lives as part time babysitters, low level Wal-Mart employees and/or living out of their parents basement and they are miserable. They complain all the time about how they can't do art stuff (they always have an excuse why they can't right now) or aren't going anywhere with their lives. I don't get it I know they have free time LOTS of free time (as I live with one, am best friends with another and well the others are constantly updating their video game live feeds).

They are miserable yet are doing nothing to better their situation! I've offered to help them with their online presence and design and their all excited but they don't do anything. Example I used to say yah I'll design your logo once you make a Facebook page and put some content on it, that's not hard to do not at all especially when they have tons of their own original content they can put up. It would take two days max to flesh out a page, and they don't ever do it. I've given step by step instructions and they don't do it.

Is it that they are just happy in their misery? I can't understand how they can just waste their talent! It frustrates me so much especially when they are handed opportunities and don't take them! I've had to work my fins to get where I am now and they get handed things but don't even take them. Example a friend received a full ride scholarship to any college of her choice from the government (because her family was classified as poor) and she never went through with it.

I don't know what's more irritation the fact they are wasting their skills (and not pursuing something) or that they have the means to better themselves and their lives and they basically squat in the mud and complain.

[Echidna]

The last days, I've been watching H2O for the very first time (I can't stand teenage stuff. derp), coz mermaids.

And while it's a likable little show, I'm annoyed by the constant blatant advocating of:

-Seaworld (it's totally ok to pen them dolphins up, everyone's happy, all's pretty neat and sunshine)
-commercial fishing (Cleo's father is a fisherman, and he's such a good dude, no fisher ever caught any creature that was endangered, woo the world is good)
-fishing with hooks, a catch-and release tournament- seriously, I had to skip those episodes.

They seem to go fishing in every second or so episode.

in case you didn't know, even if you do catch-and-release, you damage the fish so badly by handling/touching it, it will probably die anyway.
That's neither fun nor sport.
If you have to do a "who-has-the-biggest-thing"-competition, just weigh your /&%$s or something :rolleyes:

the things that are never mentioned (I'm in the middle of the second season now):
-overfishing
-most fish species are close to extinction now
-ocean pollution
-the effects Seaworld has on the captured animals' health and wellbeing

I know a lot of stuff has been filmed at Seaworld, but does it really have to be such a large fun-and-sunshine commercial?
Mako Mermaids was much better in that regard.

[Starfrit]

My voice has been gone since Sunday night and it's seriously driving me crazy! I mean, I had a minor throat infection about two weeks ago, which made talking a little difficult and led to a bad cough, but that was tolerable. But then shortly after that, I got slammed with the flu, which meant I was sniffling, coughing, and sneezing, the works. I ended up having to take a few days off work last week because of it-- I mean, if you walked into a gas station you don't want some snotty, sniffly person touching all of the stuff you're about to buy, right? Especially if that stuff is food!

I went in on Sunday figuring I was well enough to work again, and... Wellp. It was just me in the store for the last 6 hours of my shift, which meant I was the only one working there to interact with the customers. Which is... A lot of talking. My voice was already in pretty rough shape when I went in at the start of my shift, but by the end of it? Oh god. I could barely talk at all.

I had Monday and Tuesday off, and thank Triton for that because Monday was when my voice decided to completely go. My assistant manager called me that day to ask me about covering someone's shift that night, but then she changed her mind before she even asked me because when I answered the phone it took three attempts for me to even force out a "Hello," and even that was more of a squeak.

If I don't put enough force behind it when I talk, it just comes out as a whisper. But at the same time, if I put too much force behind it, like I'm trying to yell or speak louder, it just comes out as a whisper, too! It's frustrating the hell out of me! :anger explode: I had to call in sick today because of my voice again, which I really didn't want to do, but Wednesdays are some of the busiest days at our store and I was likely going to be alone at the shop again... I just can't risk doing more damage to my voice and making the problem worse.

I keep having moments like, "This must be what Ariel felt like," only Ariel couldn't talk at all. So I'm doing fairly well in comparison, and... that's something, I guess?

[Aziara]

Yeah, I lost my voice a while back. It's really tough, people expect you to talk to them, and you just can't. Good idea to take another day off, you need to rest your vocal cords so they can heal. You could get a write-and-wipe board to keep with you if you need to get a point across. Take it from me, most people suck at improvised sign language, lol.

[PearlieMae]

http://www.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/laryngitis-home-treatment

And don't whisper - it puts as much strain on your vocal cords as shouting!

Feel better! :hug:

[deepblue]

Oh I hate losing my voice. It's been forever but it's the weirdest feeling. Get yourself a notepad and write what you need to say. But not if you're somewhere like a bank, or ordering food at a counter, because their first reaction won't be to think you have laryngitis. XD

[AniaR]

Okay I have a bit of a bitch here to get off my chest, and it's been bugging me for a while now. I want to first disclaim that no, is has nothing to do with mertailor or anyone connected to him haha cuz anytime I bitch about a person everyone assumes it's related. Nothing like that.

So months and months and months ago I started doing facebook culls on my personal fb. I felt like I had too many mermaids on my profile and I was getting swarmed with messages of how do I do this do that daily. To the point people were getting angry with me for not replying when I'm you know, working. When I first started out in the community I used to add everyone because I was trying to make friends. I don't want to sound arrogant but now that I've made a name for myself, I find it hard to tell the difference between who actually wants to be a friend and who just wants everything they can get from me. The past 6 months have been rough for me. I have been seriously ill many times in and out of the hospital, and a very very very close family member almost died.

So I made a thoughtful status on facebook letting mermaids know I'd be deleting pretty much anyone I didn't personally know, or have met in person barring a few exceptions, and asking people not to take it personally. I talked about all the stuff I was going through, how my FB had become a very stressful place, how I was planning on eventually making my mermaid profile, and how people could still follow me on my mermaid page and message me there and when I had time I would respond. I left it up for a few days, and then I started deleting people. I had the odd person who didn't see the message and got upset, but a quick clarification to them and they were fine.

I want to be clear here, while some of these people I may have had for years on my profile in a limited way, most were people I did not ever talk to. In fact a few of them I felt just constantly harassed me for information. Very one sided.

So months later, on my BIRTHDAY after the family member who almost died was in the hospital for, well, almost dying, I got what I felt to be a very delusional message in my mermaid inbox from a person I had deleted. They took being deleted very personally and laid the guilt trip on pretty thick. It sorta blew my mind, because they spoke about how much they cared about me yet didnt see any of my postings about being super sick, having my family member almost die, and how I was deleting people. And these postings took up a LOT of my page. I tried to be understanding of their message to me, but one thing was clear, they imagined a relationship that really wasn't there. I was always kind to the person the way I would be to any of you, and they considered me a best friend? I don't even know their full name or age or really anything about them. So we went back and forth a bit and while I felt like this person was being very irrational I did my best to see it from their point of view, validate them, but still keep my boundary of no, I'm not adding you back or anyone else. I'll be honest, I was dealing with so many actual life or death things at the time (which I explained to them) that the whole thing kinda went in a blur for me, but they seemed okay at the end of it

I did accept a gift from this person, something hand made, and honestly I hate giving out my address to people. But they really made me feel so guilty after their message and kept bringing up the gift that I felt I had no choice but to accept least I face a big dramatic fallout again. I was under the impression they felt really bad for their behaviour at the time, and this was a sort of apology. Now I sorta think in hindsight it was manipulation.

A few months go by, I get the odd message from the person on my mermaid page which I legit didn't have the time to respond to. Whenever I did check them they were mostly questions which I kinda felt like, didn't we just go over how I'm dealing with too much to answer questions? And then I met them for the first time at NCMerfest. I had already made up my mind to let this stuff be water under the bridge. it's hard to get to know people online, and here was a chance to actually meet. So when I met them I hugged them, was kind, I tried to include them when I saw they were out, asked Seanny to take photos of them so I could send them to them etc and I just tried to treat them equally the way I treated everyone else.

When I got home from NCmerfest a bunch of other health stuff happened. I landed in the hospital again, was diagnosed with endometriosis, and a few other things. I'm not 100% sure was spurned it, but I had yet another very long nasty message from this person. Now I'm going to be blunt here I do my best to spare people's feelings in these situations, and be level headed, but given the person's recent actions toward me I don't think I have any reason to water down what i feel was happening. Readin their messages, I wondered if they had an attachment disorder. Because they had clearly imagined a whole relationship with me where I owed them for our friendship and wasn't being a good friend, and it didn't exist. No more than how shocked I'd be if one of you that I only talk to on mernetwork suddenly messaged me something like that. It came off stalkerish and I was just so floored this person felt so entitled to my time. I want to make it clear, I did not lead them on in anyway. It's not like I was talking to them 24/7 over the past years, tagging them on fb, calling them my BFF the way you see me talk to Iona or Raven. In fact I am very transparent on my personal FB with whatever issues I'm dealing with because I specifically don't want my friends to take any silences from me personally. And with actual friends it's never an issue. Well this person was attacking me for deleting them and not others. (I deleted people over a period of months, and only just deleted the last few people as I set up my new account) I feel like my reasons for keeping and deleting people are MY reasons and my prerogative and I don't owe anyone any explanations. A mutual friend had stepped in sharing a FB status of mine about what I'd been dealing with, no way directed at this person at all, but they decided to take it personally (the mutual friend and I have resolved this breech of privacy) and again go on about all these things I mean honestly it was so insane I didn't retain it. This time I didn't even focus on those things. I felt like I didn't owe any explanations or excuses this was this person's issue. Not mine. but I didn't want to address the issue of someone sharing my status. (Like I said, all resolved) The person again ended on a better note but I heard from several mutual friends they were writing things about how they'd upset the one person who means the world to them?!?!?! did I marry this person and not remember?@?@?@?@

A few days after that I made the decision to block the person and ban them from my page. After re-reading their messages to me and based on that behaviour I felt like their obsession with me was very unhealthy and that this wasn't a situation in which I could reason with the person. I felt a lot better in doing this, and I all but forgot about the person until a mermaid mentioned they were now getting the same sort of behaviour from this person and asked me for advice (mine: ignore! don't engage)

Now mutual friends with this person are all messaging me telling me they're trying to stick friends in the middle between us (I am not doing this to anyone cuz as far as I'm concerned this person is not in my life and I don't see the need to fight with them? Like, we aren't speaking) and sending them manipulative messages. e.g. this person has their own mernetwork account, and instead of saying "Hey I saw Raina posted this" it's "oh someone told me Raina posted this and you replied with that why don't you go look that up" sort of deal as if they hadn't read the posts themselves 100 times. This person is also claiming I'm totally making things Up I say on mernetwork. Protip: that would be the stupidest thing I'd ever do. As someone who does get involved with drama, WHY IN THE HELL WOULD I MAKE SOMETHING UP AND MAKE IT SO EASY FOR SOMEONE TO PROVE I AM LYING AND OH WHOOPS THERE GOES MY REPUTATION! Like seriously? They just picked that chris issue to claim I was lying about. Of course, offered no proof to the mutual friend that I was lying, and I'm sitting here scratching my head like what? I think this person feels rejected and now is trying to make me feel jealous and also trying to make people see my secret "true colours" they invented when their mind couldn't accept the fact I rejected them. I had a similar experience with a man in the community too a few years ago.

I'm being a bit passive aggressive here and I totally admit it, but this person has NOT respected my boundaries from the start - and hopefully by reading this they will see I am not taking this behaviour from them. I feel like unblocking them and replying to them is only going to give them that one on one attention they're craving. I'm also hoping that if they see people respond negatively to this behaviour they'll STOP trying to manipulate mutual friends. FYI I have never said to a mutual friend with someone who I have an issue with "you better choose them or me" or "look at their true colours". I have loads of mutual friends with eric. It would be totally inappropriate for me to message our mutual friends convincing them he's a bad guy or talking smack etc. That's super disrespectful and manipulative of my friends and I'd never do that.

So here's my main bitches here:
-people who imagine friendships and act entitled
-when someone lies about me, it's not like it's hard to see if what I'm saying is true or not. Ask me to give you proof and I will.
-if someone claims I said something, ask them for a screenshot, because anything controversial I wanna say is usually said here. And it's not like you can't check my own posts
-people who can't handle respectful and polite rejection and go all kamakazee

like dude, I am just a girl on the internet. deleting someone off facebook shouldn't equal this level of ridiculousness.

I left out this person's name on purpose. I dont think any of you would ever figure out who it was anyway beyond the one mutual friend involved. If you do figure it out, I ask you not to post. I'm not posting this to start a war I just want people to know the kind of stuff I have to deal with. It sorta gives you an idea why I don't answer emails all the time or add people to facebook. I'm not trying to be snotty or anything, I am trying to protect myself.

/end rant

[PearlieMae]

Wow! It's not me, is it?

;)


::: runs away:::

[Aziara]

Wow...just wow. I think you did the right thing, Raina. You don't need to deal with that kind of drama, especially when you're sick!

[AniaR]

Lol of course not pearlie

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk

[PearlieMae]

I am way too self-absorbed to hassle you!
:mermaid kiss:

[AniaR]

But youre a good example. You and I chat and are friendly wouldn't you be disturbed if I suddenly sent you a huge book of a message demanding more attention and posted on my fb I care about you more than anyone in the world? Lol okay I do but that's an aside
.. Lol ;)

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk

[PearlieMae]

Oh...That was you? I have so many fans, I can't keep track.

19931

[shimmygoddess]

WOW, Raina, that sounds a bit scary actually. I think you did all the right things. When things got weird you blocked them. As long as you are always being truthful (which I am sure you are), save those screenshots, and you can always backup anything you have too. (I screen shot every altercation I have online. If all hell breaks lose, I have total proof of a persons lying, manipulative ways. )There are too many self absorbed people in the world that think life revolves around them.Always trusts your instincts as they are usually right.

[Winged Mermaid]

People are friggin crazy. I had something similar happen once over LJ- same kind of falling out when I messaged them about it too. O_o

[Mermaid Wesley]

Okay, I'm usually very level headed but I'm angry. And a little hurt. This girl at my uni is treating me like a nuisance. We were partners for an acting project for like 1/3 of last semester and we were fine, she's a little standoffish but I understood that and was friendly. Then we ended up in the same art history class together! I smile at her on the first day and she looks right through me. It was odd but whatever. Months later she still hasn't spoken to me or made eye contact. There are only like 30 people in that class. She knew I was there. Then WHAT DO YOU KNOW we get paired up for a project. She's cold and rude and inconsiderate. I am being so friendly and nice. I don't understand what her problem is. She's so rude! And it's out of nowhere! Ughhhh


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[Thalassa]

Yikes. Hang in there, Raina!

[Seraphina Suds]

I need to rant a little about my living situation. My gf and I have a one bedroom appartment in a decent area, but we need more space. We're both nerds and collectors, so we have a lot of stuff. Also, my gf would really love a dog to help with her anxiety and ocd but our current place doesn't allow dogs. Our lease isn't up until January but my gf's mental health needs improving, so we are trying to find a two bedroom that accepts dogs and we'll just deal with breaking the lease on our current place.

We tried one complex that would have been perfect; glowing reviews, nice land scape, huge pool... I called them and was given the green light and set up a viewing. That viewing ended up being postponed, so we went the next week. When we got there they had no idea we were coming, there was no apartment available, and the only apartment they COULD show us was under construction. "At least the walls are up!" I swear, it was smaller than our one bedroom. We left there feeling betrayed and hopeless. Luckily, we had a back up plan.

My best friend had just moved into a condo and the one directly next to them was open. We didn't originally consider it because the area isn't great and the complex wasn't so nice. But we went for a viewing anyway since the inside of their place was so nice. The one we looked at was a lot nicer than my friend made it seem, so we applied on the spot. That was over a week ago. The woman who let us in is a realtor, but we didn't make any sort of contract with her; we got her number from our friend. She forwarded the application to the listing agent who then would forward everything to the landlord. We sent the application, a credit report, and a recent paystub. We heard nothing for a solid week, despite me checking in evey other day. Finally, after leaving the realtor a slightly threatening and very exasperated voicemail, she calls back and says the landlord/listing agent needs a credit score. Is it not their responsibility to get the credit score? Whatever, we find a free site and forward the info. Two more days and no news. I had told the realtor that if we don't get an answer by Monday evening, we'd have to look elsewhere.

Today, Tuesday, she texted me saying she hadn't heard anything and she can't believe they're taking so long and that if we don't hear from them today, she'll look somewhere else. I do not want to pay any sort of realtor fee, so I shot that down. I told her Thursday is the end; if we don't get an answer one way or the other by then, we're not moving at all. I hope she doesn't try to charge us for anything, even if we do get the appartment. It's the landlord's responsibility to pay for listing/realtor fees. We didn't hire her to find us a place to live and I made it clear we were not going to pursue anything like that. My gf has been asking reddit for advice and it seems like we are on our way to being scammed? I'm not going to let any of them take advantage of us just because we're young and a little desperate.

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[Anahita]

I need to rant a little about my living situation. My gf and I have a one bedroom appartment in a decent area, but we need more space. We're both nerds and collectors, so we have a lot of stuff. Also, my gf would really love a dog to help with her anxiety and ocd but our current place doesn't allow dogs. Our lease isn't up until January but my gf's mental health needs improving, so we are trying to find a two bedroom that accepts dogs and we'll just deal with breaking the lease on our current place.


Just an FYI, if her anxiety and OCD are that bad, and she's diagnosed, a psychiatrist or psycho-therapist can set her up to have a service dog. By the ADA, you cannot be removed from your residence for a service animal. But you do have to have some relatively severe disorders to qualify for a service dog (you can't just decide that you're sad, so you need a dog).

I know this because my own dog is a service dog.

I think, translated from what my doctor diagnosed me with, I have anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, what I think is bipolar disorder (when I translate it, it comes out as "bouts of depression, mania and hypomania", which sound more like symptoms to me, but idk). So some of the things it seems she has.

I will say that I do also have panic attacks that resemble seizures, and actual seizures; however, the latter were NOT the deciding factors for me getting the dog, they were actually just things that would benefit even more from the dog. Medication for the former problems had not been working well for me (my English can't really express what had been happening, otherwise I'd let you know, because I'm sure it would help your gf to see if she qualified for a service dog), so my psychiatrist decided that because of what was happening she would take me off of my medications (the exception was the seizure meds, I do still have to have those, but she reduced those even and told me to go get a recommendation to supplement) and then have me get a service dog.

Now, I adopted a dog from a shelter then released her to my cousin for training because my cousin also suffers from PTSD, anxiety, and manic/hypomanic/depressive episodes and has a service dog herself as well as experience with training them. So over the course of me being safely removed from my medications and supplementing them with more natural substances, my dog was being trained to be certified. I'm not "cured", not by a long shot, and sometimes I do get into anxiety-inducing incidents BECAUSE of the dog and the fact that people refuse to obey the law (it's not to do with living situations, actually, but because I bring her with me everywhere, and sometimes, people can be ignorant about what a service dog can be); but for the most part, between her (the dog) and my partner, I'm much better off than when I was on meds. The dog then trained herself to give me a seizure alert. I have no idea how she trained herself to give seizure alerts, but she has, which is fortunate for me, because seizure alert dogs cost an arm and a leg and are often times a larger breed so they can not only alert, but also help save you from a fall; whereas a emotional support, therapy, etc. dog can actually be trained from pretty much any dog (mine came from a shelter, is 3.5 pounds, and was 3 years old when she began her training, just to give you an idea of what you can work with).

Also, smaller dogs are good for emotional support animals because they can travel with you easier, and and can fit in an apartment with not a lot of space.

I'm sorry I can't offer any help with dealing with the actual apartment - my partner is like my caretaker, and so he's the one who went through all hell and hassle of finding us a place to live (truthfully, he's also the one who got the paperwork from the apartment we lived in that we had to file when we let them know we were bringing in a service dog, I pretty much just reminded my psychiatrist to sign said papers) but at least maybe letting you know that your gf, if her health is getting that bad, might be able to get a service dog could help. I know how much better mine has made me feel and how it's helped me, and I'd hate to see someone denied it simply because they might not have been aware that it was an option to them.

[Seraphina Suds]

Just an FYI, if her anxiety and OCD are that bad, and she's diagnosed, a psychiatrist or psycho-therapist can set her up to have a service dog. By the ADA, you cannot be removed from your residence for a service animal. But you do have to have some relatively severe disorders to qualify for a service dog (you can't just decide that you're sad, so you need a dog).

I know this because my own dog is a service dog.

You are so helpful! Thank you! She's actually been looking into getting an emotional support animal (ESA). And you're right, if she's referred to a psychiatrist (she has a therapist currently) and they think an ESA is appropriate, no appartment can deny it. I think ESA's are different from service dogs though. They can be any animal really, and I think the laws are a bit different. Like, you can't bring them everywhere like a service animal, but they have to live with you and I think you can take them on an airplane. Do you mind if I let her know you have a service dog? She's been researching pretty hard and it might help if she knew someone real (as real as the internet allows :p) that had one.

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[Anahita]

You are so helpful! Thank you! She's actually been looking into getting an emotional support animal (ESA). And you're right, if she's referred to a psychiatrist (she has a therapist currently) and they think an ESA is appropriate, no appartment can deny it. I think ESA's are different from service dogs though. They can be any animal really, and I think the laws are a bit different. Like, you can't bring them everywhere like a service animal, but they have to live with you and I think you can take them on an airplane. Do you mind if I let her know you have a service dog? She's been researching pretty hard and it might help if she knew someone real (as real as the internet allows :p) that had one.

Sent from my GT-N5110 using Tapatalk

Yeah, no problem, she can know, I'm not super-secretive about it. Especially if it'll help. :)

And yeah, sometimes ESAs are treated a bit differently than a general service dog - my friend's younger sister has an ESA that's a rabbit and he doesn't go with her everywhere, he pretty much kicks back at home and goes with her when she has a big trip. I think it's probably because of my PTSD and my seizures that got mine elevated from basic ESA to fully-fledged service dog.

[Seraphina Suds]

Ah, thanks! You're the best, Anahita! <3 I feel much calmer now lol

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[Anahita]

You're welcome :) I'm glad I could help!

[Kaila Mermaid]

This is probably a dumb thing to rant about, but I'm tired of my job working my eight and a half hour days with no form of break of lunch break. I don't even have a chair I sit on. I'm tired of working 40+ hours a week as a part time employee, but I don't want to say anything because any time I approach my store manager about it, he replies with a guilt trip making me think I should be grateful for this. And this is only one of my jobs, aside from working with my modeling agency and also the whole mermaiding thing. It's hard to promise parents you'll be at their kid's parties when work keeps calling you in. The least they could do would be toss me a sandwich and maybe health benefits *end rant*

[Anahita]

This is probably a dumb thing to rant about, but I'm tired of my job working my eight and a half hour days with no form of break of lunch break. I don't even have a chair I sit on. I'm tired of working 40+ hours a week as a part time employee, but I don't want to say anything because any time I approach my store manager about it, he replies with a guilt trip making me think I should be grateful for this. And this is only one of my jobs, aside from working with my modeling agency and also the whole mermaiding thing. It's hard to promise parents you'll be at their kid's parties when work keeps calling you in. The least they could do would be toss me a sandwich and maybe health benefits *end rant*

How is that even legal?

I thought it was mandatory for anyone working an 8 hour shift - even if it's just a part-time job - to have at least a 15 minute break. And 40+ hours, I thought that was federally recognized as "full time"...

That's really sad and scary to hear that's happening to you. Isn't there a way you can report him?

[Mermaid Wesley]

That's how it is for California at least.... You should check your states labor laws.


Sent from my shellphone using Tapatalk

[AniaR]

I work 9 hours and get no break either. I'm in Canada though, but there are exemptions to those laws :(

[BayouMermaid]

I feel ya. At the place that I work, we are required to clock out for mandatory lunches if the shift is more than 5 hours long, but they are so stingy with hours that there is no one to cover you. So you clock out and are "on call", which means that if a customer needs help, you better drop the sandwich and go catch some fish (I work at a pet store). Yeah... that is time that I'm working and NOT getting paid *grumble*

[Mermaid Momo]

Okay, now time for my little rant:
I can't stand when Vegans feed their dogs or cats an all vegan diet! these animals need meat! and then they go all over the internet telling other people that they can give their dogs and cats an all vegan diet. Like seriously, if you want a vegan animal get a freaking herbivore! Stop torturing these poor animals for your own ideas of what they should and shouldn't be eating.

[Mermaid Wesley]

oh. god. yes. wow. I've argued with a person doing that for hours and I was crying by the end of the argument. That will kill your pet and they're doing it willingly because they're brainwashed by the idea that there's nothing special about meat. Grrrrr. Nonsense. Makes me so upset.

[Aziara]

Okay, now time for my little rant:
I can't stand when Vegans feed their dogs or cats an all vegan diet! these animals need meat! and then they go all over the internet telling other people that they can give their dogs and cats an all vegan diet. Like seriously, if you want a vegan animal get a freaking herbivore! Stop torturing these poor animals for your own ideas of what they should and shouldn't be eating.
^this. Totally. People should get a rabbit if they want a vegan critter, or an iguana if they want an exotic. Cats need meat or their retina will detach! It's not as important for dogs, though still necessary for full health.

[Vixy]

I just found out that my brother had put chewing gum on an art piece I spent ages working on, on and off for about a month. His also put it where my head will go, so he's pretty much destroyed a months work in a funny and thoughtless act. Funny by his standards. He put food that moulded in my shoes, one of the pairs I had to throw away because they were fabric. He put food in my bed, messy food so my bed was soaked.

My parents were confused why my sleeping patterns were changed, because of him that inconsiderate fool. I was terrified I would be woken up by a airhorn in my ear (which give me an ear infection, yet he still blasted me while it was at it's worse) flour in my face among so much other things.

That all pales in comparison to what he did to my art. I'm frightened to do anything mer related, making a shell bra or crown just because I might come down one morning and find it destroyed because he thought it was fun to do that.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

If your parents don't do anything about it, to stop the bullying, buy a pair of steel capped boots.

Scream and cry, get your anger out, make it convincing, then give him a kick in the jewels without them on but show it to him.
Show him you mean business and are not to be trifled with.

Tell him if he ever touches any of your stuff or hurt you again, you'll kick him whilst wearing the capped boots when he's asleep.

Hide it somewhere safe. An understanding friend's house so that he can't steal or ruin them.
Totally worth the steel capped boots...

I did the same in primary school, except I didn't have those boots then. After that, the boy never picked on me or any of the Chinese kids again.

But if he's younger than you, just slap him across the face. A nice red hand print will tell everyone that somebody got punished for mean things.

[PearlieMae]

Let him wake up with you standing next to his bed with a baseball bat or hammer in your hand. Remind him he has to sleep sometime.

(How old is he?)

[Vixy]

Let him wake up with you standing next to his bed with a baseball bat or hammer in your hand. Remind him he has to sleep sometime.

(How old is he?)

I have a various different swords, or I could borrow various other weapons from friends. It's great to be a reenactor and knowing others who have a weapons arsenal in their home.

He's 19, so he should know better.

I also worry he'd punch me if I did anything or throw something hard at me.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

He's doing it because he sees your fear of him. That's how bullies work.

Once you show him you're not scared of him anymore, he'll stop.

[PearlieMae]

19? I thought he might have been 12-13ish...or younger. I wouldn't go with a real weapon...household stuff is pretty threatening and swords might make him think you aren't serious.

He definitely has some serious issues. Have you sat down with your parents to really discuss this?

[Vixy]

19? I thought he might have been 12-13ish...or younger. I wouldn't go with a real weapon...household stuff is pretty threatening and swords might make him think you aren't serious.

He definitely has some serious issues. Have you sat down with your parents to really discuss this?

The weapon part was more of a joke. I'm at my wits end as he should of moved out months ago, yet he's still there. He tells our parents how much he hates me and can't stand living here with me. Great, nice meeting you confidence. I don't do anything, I'm glad I got a job that has me works evenings so I don't have to be there.

Even facebook isn't safe as he called me a weirdo and then insults my friends when they try and defend me.

And yeah 19, he's an adult and he still puts chewing gum on my things and food in my things. I much rather he just doesn't bother me, I won't bother him.

[PearlieMae]

If he won't move and your parents are no help, it's time to sock away enough money to move the f*** out. ASAP.

[Echidna]

If he won't move and your parents are no help, it's time to sock away enough money to move the f*** out. ASAP.

this!
such a situation puts far too much stress on you, it's unhealthy in the long run.

if you cannot move out on your own just yet, maybe you have other relatives where you could go live for a while instead?
at any rate, if a sibling goes on about how he hates you and does retarded stuff at an age of over 18, it's pretty clear it won't get better in the future.

I'm really sorry you are in such a shitty situation and your parents are no help.
(I'd expect them to throw him out with such behaviour.)

[BlueMermaid]

Dogs can eat vegan. My dogs do, and they are very healthy. One of my dogs is a little too healthy, if you know what I mean...lol Seriously tho, it's even helped some dogs with some serious allergies and medical conditions. My cat is not vegan, because cat's are not able to be. Personally I could go on a rant about how unhealthy conventional dog and cat food is, and how that is killing them. But most people think it's better to feed their dogs a bunch of garbage and chemicals than vegan health food, so I don't bother.


Okay, now time for my little rant:
I can't stand when Vegans feed their dogs or cats an all vegan diet! these animals need meat! and then they go all over the internet telling other people that they can give their dogs and cats an all vegan diet. Like seriously, if you want a vegan animal get a freaking herbivore! Stop torturing these poor animals for your own ideas of what they should and shouldn't be eating.

[AniaR]

it has a lot to do with the dogs breed from what I have read. And yeah I've also read that conventional dog food is shit! my stepmom has always made food for our dogs.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

When I had a dog, I used to feed it leftover rice, vegies, meats and pork bones.

Basically, she ate we we ate. She wasn't a fan of soup though.

[Jeblily]

Had to comment about the dog diets...
Dogs are technically obligate carnivores which should make there diets similar to cats but they aren't. The difference between dogs and their ancestral wolves is that dogs have more copies of the AMY1 gene which allows the dog to produce enzymes to break down carbohydrates. Depending on the dog breed they may have more or less of these copies, therefore some dogs may be able to survive and even thrive on a vegan diet, others cannot. I find it is best to allow dogs to have access to multiple food types to get the nutrients they need. I offer Lily , my dog, a high protein dog jerky, a dry food, vegetables and fruits, as well as rice and fresh meats. The most important thing for dogs is variety without upsetting their stomachs. Nutrient deficiencies develop when they are fed the same foods, this is REALLY important when feeding vegan diets to dogs because you have to get creative to get certain proteins and vitamins in their diet. Most importantly I hate how today dog foods are marketed to be the only things that dogs can eat and how fresh "human" foods cannot be given to them. If you would not eat your dogs food based on quality, taste aside, don't feed it!!! You have to be careful because dogs do have certain nutritional values that have to be met so feeding them scraps of what you eat every day will not work, but fresh foods are great and consult your vet when you are unsure about what to feed!

[MerEmma]

We have three dogs that we feed grain free dog food and a lot of table scraps. We feel like that's the best for them, and the food is pretty expensive but definitely worth it. Two of them have issues with their anal glands (lol) and we noticed by switching they needed vet visits far less often. When you think about it, how often would a dog eat grains in the wild? Not much!

[Mermaid Jaffa]

My dog never had scraps!

We always cooked an extra serving of everything, except seafood, she didn't like those, just for Patches.

[Mizuko]

The dog we have been looking after (the house-owner left her here...) is gluten intolerant, like me! haha! So she gets fresh food/meat, my leftovers, and wheat-free dog food. Like most omnivorous creatures, a varied diet is best in my opinion! :)

[Starfrit]

Had a robbery at my store tonight while I was working alone. It was only minor-- Just a case of beer taken and the guy didn't threaten to hurt me or anything, but I'm still really shaken up by it.

I was doing the shift-change around 10PM (switching the registers over to the overnight shift for when Overnight Guy showed up at 11) when I noticed this guy walking over to the shop from the direction of the trailer park, and by his weird behavior as he crossed the parking lot I assumed he'd already had a few drinks. Sure enough he walks in, makes his way to the beer cooler in the back, asking me all kinds of questions about when we closed (we're 24 hours so we never close), what time we stop selling beer (by law we have to stop at 2AM), etc... He grabs an 8-case of Budweiser cans and comes up to the cash, and tries to hand me a $100 bill to pay for it.

Bear in mind, we only keep $100 in the tills at any given time, and the beer came to <$20. I explain to him that because of store policy, I'm not allowed to take $100s and the most I'd be able to take is a $50. The guy starts getting really irate, insisting that all he has in a $100. I tell him, sorry, I can't do it, you'll have to come back with something else.

He started cursing and swearing and yelling, and well... That was bad enough. Due to my severe anxiety and a troubled childhood, I don't react well to people yelling at me, so I was already starting to turn into a nervous wreck, telling him "Sorry, I can't do it, it's against store policy, I'm sorry."

So then he started yelling and cursing more and says, "So what you're f--kin' sayin' is, I can just take this, right? 'Cause you're too f--kin' stupid to take my f--kin' money, so I can just take it."

I explained to him that no, that's stealing. He picked it up before I could think to grab it and started going towards the door saying, "No, that's what you're f--kin' sayin' though, is I can take it."

I'll admit, I lost my cool there, and ended up screeching "EXCUSE ME GET THE F--K BACK HERE" as he was storming out the door, to which he told me "FUCK OFF, C**T" and made his way across the parking lot and back the way he came.

I called my manager and explained what happened, and asked if I should call the police (turned out it was pointless, because the guy didn't threaten me and it was just a case of beer, the police wouldn't have done anything anyway). I was in such a state and so shaken up by it that I started sobbing over the phone, which had him really concerned. I have problems with how the store is run, and me working by myself at night has been an issue since I started working at this location-- my manager knows, and he's been doing what he can to get more people on with me, but unfortunately his boss and corporate have been getting on his case about the added hours so there are still some nights every week where it's just me.

The whole thing sent me into a full-blown panic attack for pretty much the rest of my shift (which, I guess if I wanted to look at it from a somewhat optimistic angle, was "only" another hour), and it sucked trying to deal with that and serve customers that came in after that at the same time. Thankfully the rest of the customers were really great about it, and a few stuck around to try and cheer me up until my boyfriend showed up after I texted him about what happened.

Even when I got home I couldn't stop crying about it... It's going on 4AM now as I'm writing this and I still keep breaking down over it. My anxiety is still through the freaking roof right and I'm... I'm not sure if "Scared" is the right word for it...? But basically, I'm worried about going to bed, because at least when I'm at the computer I have something that can distract me, mermaid pictures and music and such, and I'm worried that if I curl up in bed and try to sleep now, I'm just gonna end up spending all night lying there thinking about it and end up feeling worse. Every time I think about going to bed it all just comes back and I get that knot in my stomach and the lump in my throat. I'm probably going to be up and lurking around the forums for a few more hours, or until I just fall asleep from sheer exhaustion. Wouldn't be the first time.

I think what's making it worse is the fact that I keep thinking about all the ways that it could have been worse... He was obviously drunk, what if he'd turned violent? What if he'd had a freaking WEAPON?! I'm 5'2", 100-and-shit-all-lbs and an earthworm has more spine than me, what the hell am I supposed to do if something like that escalates when I'm there by myself?

Thankfully, I had tomorrow (today?) and Thursday off on my schedule anyway, so I don't have to deal with being at the store until Friday night, when I know there'll be somebody scheduled with me. I spent some time tonight updating my resume, and I'm probably going to start job-hunting tomorrow... I'm going to talk to my boss about this working-alone thing and see what can be done about it, but... I don't know. I've been sort of pushed to the limit with this job as it is, but now I'm really thinking I might need to seriously work on getting the hell out of it, if only because-- and maybe this is just the current anxiety spike talking-- I really am genuinely fearing for my safety.

[Mermaid Wesley]

*big hugs*


Sent from my shellphone using Tapatalk

[Nicky-Katz]

You've been really brave there, Tieri!

All I can tell is... your boss is a terrible person (Ok, that's a bit overhead), but making people work at night alone is threatening those people to all the possible risks...

It's a good idea to talk about it with your manager and the boss, but it's also not a bad thing to look for a job, where you wouldn't have to work alone.

All the best to you!

[Mermaid Tula]

So I have an issue. I've noticed this not just once, not twice, not even just three times. I've seen it so many times. This isn't just happening tome, I see it happening to other mermaids too.

This issue is that of a certain kind of theft. More like ripping off.

I've posted several things here on Mernetwork and on my facebook page. Things like jewelry, things like my seashell mask, things like my resin necklace tails. I post these because yes, I'm trying to show off to everyone, and yes I'm trying to sell it to help support myself and my family.
I have people say "Oh that's so cool!" and "If I had the money I'd buy one in a heart beat." Then that's the last I hear. I get likes, and that's about it.
Then after a while, I look at some other mer's pages, and lo and behold, what do I see? Products being sold that look very much like the ones I've made, (or other mer's have made) usually for cheaper.
I'm just so frustrated because I'm trying to build up my business, and all my ideas that I post are getting ripped off. I'm pissed, I'm upset, and there's nothing I can do about it. I'm borderline debating on just dropping everything and saying fuck it all. I'm not going to, because I'm stupid and want to keep trying.

[AniaR]

sadly our mer-community is full of people who have no problem ripping each other off. I found a few knock off versions of my book name "fishy business" being used for other mermaid stuff by people who clearly know about it. it is aggravating for sure but they'll never be as awesome as the originals ;)

[Mermaid Tula]

That sucks Raina! I agree, the originals are best! <3

[BlueMermaid]

It kinda sucks but there is nothing you can really do about it. I learned that early on when I started making mermaid fluke necklaces. Now everyone makes them! It's just something you have to accept will happen. I have 2 new inventions I'm going to be selling soon, and I know other people will start making them, I'm prepared for it. Heck the will probably make them better than I do! haha

Also I used to be part of a online sculpting group, and I've seen it happen where 2 or more people had the same idea at the same time, and they all made them at the same time, and at first it appears they copied, but they actually had no idea that another person had done the same things.


So I have an issue. I've noticed this not just once, not twice, not even just three times. I've seen it so many times. This isn't just happening tome, I see it happening to other mermaids too.

This issue is that of a certain kind of theft. More like ripping off.

I've posted several things here on Mernetwork and on my facebook page. Things like jewelry, things like my seashell mask, things like my resin necklace tails. I post these because yes, I'm trying to show off to everyone, and yes I'm trying to sell it to help support myself and my family.
I have people say "Oh that's so cool!" and "If I had the money I'd buy one in a heart beat." Then that's the last I hear. I get likes, and that's about it.
Then after a while, I look at some other mer's pages, and lo and behold, what do I see? Products being sold that look very much like the ones I've made, (or other mer's have made) usually for cheaper.
I'm just so frustrated because I'm trying to build up my business, and all my ideas that I post are getting ripped off. I'm pissed, I'm upset, and there's nothing I can do about it. I'm borderline debating on just dropping everything and saying fuck it all. I'm not going to, because I'm stupid and want to keep trying.

[Aziara]

^A little thing I like to call 'convergent evolution of ideas'. It happens a lot. Like when I planned my wedding: I used things that suddenly came into vogue right before my wedding--I came up with the ideas before they became popular, then it looked like I was just going with the 'popular' stuff. I didn't really care that much though, I was just doing stuff that I thought was pretty.

[PearlieMae]

Convergent evolution of ideas is a great way to describe it. There are only so many ways to do something and we all appropriate...I defy anyone to go through a productive day and not do or say something that hasn't been done before.

Raina, I'm sorry that others are using "fishy business" in relation to mermaiding, that's an obvious rip off, but the term "fishy business" has been in the vernacular for decades. Your usage actually turns the phrase on its ear and turns it into a positive.

Everyone IS making mini flukes nowadays, and you see them all over the internet. I made my first mermaid mini fluke necklace in 1975 and sold them at craft fairs. I've developed and created things with no reference only to find someone else has been manufacturing virtually the same thing for years. It happens.

The oldest known form of personal adornment, over 15,000 years old, is a strand of shells, stained with oxidized minerals to color them red. THAT'S the original. Everything else since then is derivative and/or an extrapolation.

Design exclusivity and copyright are expensive and ultimately disappointing to pursue, especially now that the internet gives everyone access to the images of others' work from all over the world. You just have to keep plugging away and moving forward.

[Thalassa]

So, mini-rant: I am so stressed and tired trying to keep my kids afloat in my teaching job! Everything keeps changing, teachers aren't allowed any decision making and yet get blamed for everything that goes wrong. We are the front lines with the kids and parents, and the POLITICs! Oh, the politics that go on!

The last straw was this week. For reference: I teach 5th grade (10-11 year olds). A week ago I got a brand new student. We'll call him A. A just arrived from Mexico, and I mean JUST arrived. He doesn't speak any English, so I mustered up my best English Language Learner training and high school Spanish to try and help him. I made sure he had a fluent translator friend who was responsible and tried to help him know that his job right now was to get accustomed to the language around him (so he didn't have to stress about the schoolwork). Work that was absolutely necessary or that would help him fit in I translated into Spanish. From the very first, he refused to work and gave off an "I don't want to be here" attitude. I saw that he didn't even try to read my Spanish notes, and an alarm went off in my head. I tried researching how school worked where he came from so I could know what he was unfamiliar with in my classroom, and that helped a little.

I was trying to "talk" with him via Google Translate (yes, I know, but when you have no other way to communicate with a kid...) and noticed every time I typed something he'd look at it blankly. I'd have to read the Spanish version aloud before he showed a flicker of comprehension. This made me wonder more, so I asked him to draw a picture of his favorite futbol team and write telling me about them. He drew the picture, but refused to write even when told through a translator the exact words to write. Finally, he wrote "Mexico" spelling it M-E-I-A-O-U-O. I immediately thought, "this child doesn't know basic phonics in his own language!"

Now here's the thing: I talked with the English Language specialist at my school to find out what testing had been done and if she was seeing the same results, and she said they don't test the children coming in to see what they've learned in their native language! She said it didn't matter if he knew how to read and write in Spanish because he was starting over in English! That made me see red. As teachers we're told and required to assess up the WAZOO and accommodate everything under the sun, but they won't do a test to find out what point this child is at? I don't have the know-how to be able to test this child in Spanish, just who's supposed to find out where he is? Are we just supposed to let him flounder and suppose that when he's learned English he'll have caught up in everything else? The principal at my school said this was the first time in 10 years of teaching and admin that he'd ever seen something like this.

Long story short: I insisted he be tested in his native language and we found out he can't read or write or do basic math. He barely knows his alphabet. Imagine coming into a new place where you don't speak the language AND they're doing work YEARS above your level. How scary! They moved him to fourth grade to give him another year to catch up, but since he's ELL he doesn't qualify for any intensive services (that's reserved for the Special Ed kids with IEPs only). I feel so bad that he has to start over again, and frustrated that nobody thought to test him before placing him in a grade.

*sigh* And if you made it this far, you deserve a prize. :-)
EDIT: Maybe not so mini, lol.

[Winged Mermaid]

Wow, poor kid :( At least there are people like you that actually CARE about the kids, cause the system sure as heck doesn't -_-

[Winged Mermaid]

So.. just spent hours making a logo and then realized when I was done.. I used the wrong name. ..I used my shop old name, which wasn't available on Etsy.

https://31.media.tumblr.com/f83f231b14236d326186a070a0247966/tumblr_n3mjuzovv01s7kq7po1_500.gif

[Ariel-Starfish]

Omg that sucks big time! It's like when I'm editing a for a youtube video, and iMovie freezes when I want to export it. :nocomment:

[Odette]

I'm done!
I got 88 on my test. need 90 to pass and that's on every test and its only for a grade of "C". I have 4 to do and i'm on 3. due May 20th. Shouldn't be so bad.

Earlier i found out i got the wrong book. Same exact cover, but one is an intro version with 9 chapters. I get complete version which is 13 chapters, but the assessment is saying there is 17 chapters! I contact him about it and he merely says, " Keep doing the work,thanks". He didn't even read my email or he doesn't speak English.
I want at least a B, but he doesn't post anything about what we need to do to do that. Hopefully once i finish 4 i will automatically see it. Worst class ever =/

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3cpazy8Sg1qzctdv.gif

*sigh* I actually feel better now =)

[Aperture_Platypus]

So yeah, last Thursday at work, my boss called me into his office. There was an HR rep there. He looked at me and said this exact sentence. "Your work isn;t where we thought it would be. We're letting you go, today is your last day."

So yeah, no warning, no notice that they were dissatisfied. Just an axe. I got fired. Looking for a new job as we speak. If anyone knows any insurance based jobs around Chicago, IL, please let me know.

Aside from worrying about paying bills, I can't buy the materials to build the silicone tail I had designed. I'll keep you all posted on my search progress.

[Mermaid Lilium]

So yeah, last Thursday at work, my boss called me into his office. There was an HR rep there. He looked at me and said this exact sentence. "Your work isn;t where we thought it would be. We're letting you go, today is your last day."

So yeah, no warning, no notice that they were dissatisfied. Just an axe. I got fired. Looking for a new job as we speak. If anyone knows any insurance based jobs around Chicago, IL, please let me know.

Aside from worrying about paying bills, I can't buy the materials to build the silicone tail I had designed. I'll keep you all posted on my search progress.

That would be so unbelievably illegal here in the UK X_x USA personel law just makes me want to ragequit so bad....

[AniaR]

Thalassa I had the same issue with an Arabic student.

Sent from my Nexus 4 using Tapatalk

[PearlieMae]

So yeah, last Thursday at work, my boss called me into his office. There was an HR rep there. He looked at me and said this exact sentence. "Your work isn;t where we thought it would be. We're letting you go, today is your last day."

So yeah, no warning, no notice that they were dissatisfied. Just an axe. I got fired. Looking for a new job as we speak. If anyone knows any insurance based jobs around Chicago, IL, please let me know.

Aside from worrying about paying bills, I can't buy the materials to build the silicone tail I had designed. I'll keep you all posted on my search progress.

Do you know if they had an 'employment at will' statement in their hiring policies? Were you there long enough to file for unemployment?

[Mermaid Lilium]

so I have a deadline tomorrow and too much work to actually get done by then... and I can't focus cause of anxiety which is made even worse by the fact I've found out late last night that an indonesian publisher stole one of my 'wuthering heights' photos for a cover of a translated version of wuthering heights. An image I've had lots of indie writers aproach for their period ebooks but I've had to say no because I knew I could sell it for a commercial cover and be paid. Also for reasons such as I had to write a check for what works out as $1670 to the designer of the dress from the shoot for her to cash in case the dress was damaged (which could easily have happened as it was a location shoot) I drove hours to get to the location, had models travel in from both sides of the country..... it cost myself a lot to do too because I wanted to do it.

This company never attempted to contact me, used it without permission and have been selling these books since 2011. *table flip*

Luckily managed to track the publishers down and sent them a rather scathing email... lets see if they actually fucking reply.

I'm also stressing about my best friend who has gone in for some fairly major surgery today (can't name them or say what the surgery is) so I'm also fighting the urge to pace up and down my house out of worry for them.

Also seeing as I haven't given an update in a while. Mum's ex - Paul, is still not out of our lives and is still being a fucktard. He seems to be trying to make the house sale fall through. Mum has submitted all the paperwork the solicitors need for the house sale to go through and he hasn't submitted a single piece of paper and isn't responding to their letters or calls. *sigh* so we're in limbo not knowing when we're going to have to move out, and at the moment that would be into a rental because mum can't get a mortgage because of HIM making her take on debts and affecting her credit rating. I can't start doing sculpting for tailmaking until we're moved into a non-rental house. I could do it but then we might have to move and it be wrecked or moulds could be broken, and I can't be pouring silicone in a rental property! I also can't get a new cat until we're settled in the non-rental house too! :'(

I also went through a seriously painful medical procedure april 1st... and it seems to have done fuck all :'( I'd been holding off on my training because of it.

LIFE. WAI. YOU. TROLL. ME?!!

Edit: Not to mention the fact that my marriage seems to be fucking non-existant.

[SeaGlass Siren]

So las Vegas is a cesspool of tobacco fume. Since I'm Canadian all public places have designated smoking areas or there's no smoking allowed. This place however ...


Guess I'm coming home with lung cancer and blisters on my feet lol.. :p

[Mermaid Mhara]

URGH I need a rant...

So my Boyfriend's mother is being a complete pain. Throughout our relationship she has been the main cause of everything wrong in our relationship, and in most things wrong in my life. Right at the start she was very supportive, however I was very shy...and because I was very shy she somehow took offence to that? O_o I know it's weird...but anyway, I went COMPLETELY out of my comfort zone to try and please her and make her happy...but to no avail, she seemed to completely disregard me as a human being and think of me as 'rude' for being shy and not talkative.
Fast forward and I turned 16 (I was 14 at the beginning of our relationship) and my boyfriend starts staying over at mine, in my bed instead of on the sofa as it was before. I wasn't even allowed to stay in his because of his apparent 'homophobic stepdad' (I'll get to why that's in quote marks later) so I respect the mans opinions and not bug anyone, and instead stay at a friends in my boyfriend's town whenever there was something on which required me to stay in town longer than the bus times.
However, there were various occasions where I only needed to stay an hour after the last train, and yet I was NEVER offered a lift home by his parents and when I asked for one, I was usually answered with a 'No' or with a 'Yes if you pay for the petrol' now the paying thing wouldn't even bother me...if my family didn't drive my boyfriend wherever I asked! And this is a BIG thing because my family has gone through a LOT in the three years me and my boyfriend have been together, and yet my family has NEVER EVER made it a problem for us two...and yet any little thing going wrong in his mother's life affects us somehow.

Fast forward again and my bf's mother falls out with a mutual friend, and I take my bf's mother side because I see that she is right...and WOW we're suddenly friends and she doesn't mind me staying over. now back to the homophobic step-dad. Whenever my boyfriend asked HIM if I could stay over all he said was 'Of course, so long as you stay out of my way' which leads me to think the problem with me staying over was HER problem all along. But who cares right? We're friends now and everything's great!

Yeah not for long...I have a disagreement with someone who she is friend's with. This disagreement is NOTHING to do with her...but suddenly she hates me again and is causing me and my boyfriend so much pain...as if we have nothing else going on between us anyway!

Safe to say I cannot WAIT for my boyfriend to graduate uni, get a job, and move out so we can be free of her! urgh. Funny thing is, I don't think she realises how much pain she causes her own son.

[Mermaid Lilium]

URGH I need a rant...

So my Boyfriend's mother is being a complete pain. Throughout our relationship she has been the main cause of everything wrong in our relationship, and in most things wrong in my life. Right at the start she was very supportive, however I was very shy...and because I was very shy she somehow took offence to that? O_o I know it's weird...but anyway, I went COMPLETELY out of my comfort zone to try and please her and make her happy...but to no avail, she seemed to completely disregard me as a human being and think of me as 'rude' for being shy and not talkative.
Fast forward and I turned 16 (I was 14 at the beginning of our relationship) and my boyfriend starts staying over at mine, in my bed instead of on the sofa as it was before. I wasn't even allowed to stay in his because of his apparent 'homophobic stepdad' (I'll get to why that's in quote marks later) so I respect the mans opinions and not bug anyone, and instead stay at a friends in my boyfriend's town whenever there was something on which required me to stay in town longer than the bus times.
However, there were various occasions where I only needed to stay an hour after the last train, and yet I was NEVER offered a lift home by his parents and when I asked for one, I was usually answered with a 'No' or with a 'Yes if you pay for the petrol' now the paying thing wouldn't even bother me...if my family didn't drive my boyfriend wherever I asked! And this is a BIG thing because my family has gone through a LOT in the three years me and my boyfriend have been together, and yet my family has NEVER EVER made it a problem for us two...and yet any little thing going wrong in his mother's life affects us somehow.

Fast forward again and my bf's mother falls out with a mutual friend, and I take my bf's mother side because I see that she is right...and WOW we're suddenly friends and she doesn't mind me staying over. now back to the homophobic step-dad. Whenever my boyfriend asked HIM if I could stay over all he said was 'Of course, so long as you stay out of my way' which leads me to think the problem with me staying over was HER problem all along. But who cares right? We're friends now and everything's great!

Yeah not for long...I have a disagreement with someone who she is friend's with. This disagreement is NOTHING to do with her...but suddenly she hates me again and is causing me and my boyfriend so much pain...as if we have nothing else going on between us anyway!

Safe to say I cannot WAIT for my boyfriend to graduate uni, get a job, and move out so we can be free of her! urgh. Funny thing is, I don't think she realises how much pain she causes her own son.

*hugs* she needs a good finslap round the back of the head. Probably if you and your boyfriend suddenly stood up to her together or he did on his own and told her outright why you are quiet and that it's not acceptable and fair for her to treat you so differently on a whim based on matters that don't even concern her, and his opinion of her (and the pain she's caused), you'd probably shock her into sorting out her behaviour, she's probably only acting this way because she's trying to be the dominant personality and she sees that you seem easier to be dominant over cause you're quiet and reserved. If that makes sense 0.o

[Vixy]

I'm browsing this forum happily, and on some pages I get the 'aww snap!' page from google chrome letting me know that the page doesn't want to work. It's really annoying and I've tried everything. So at the moment some threads and pages I'm unable to get on.

[Merman Arion]

I'm browsing this forum happily, and on some pages I get the 'aww snap!' page from google chrome letting me know that the page doesn't want to work. It's really annoying and I've tried everything. So at the moment some threads and pages I'm unable to get on.

I had that happening all day long yesterday for the 39th page of the "Soap opera drama bubble" thread. It was frustrating! :mad:

[Vixy]

That's the one I'm also having trouble with, it's still happening today :(
.......
Seriously need to get this off my chest.

I went out with friends, there's a guy there who just can't take no for an answer. He freaked me out the last time we all went out by constantly sending me messages on facebook, wall of texts telling me how much he cared and that I was a stone cold woman because I didn't want a relationship. I only met him for a couple of hours.

Then last night he tried to kiss me, hold my hand and guilt tripped me into hugging him. He keeps trying.

I have no idea what to do, I'm too nice to tell him to go away.

[Lucinda]

€@&%%#! Leaky diving mask!

[Mermaid Lilium]

That's the one I'm also having trouble with, it's still happening today :(
.......
Seriously need to get this off my chest.

I went out with friends, there's a guy there who just can't take no for an answer. He freaked me out the last time we all went out by constantly sending me messages on facebook, wall of texts telling me how much he cared and that I was a stone cold woman because I didn't want a relationship. I only met him for a couple of hours.

Then last night he tried to kiss me, hold my hand and guilt tripped me into hugging him. He keeps trying.

I have no idea what to do, I'm too nice to tell him to go away.

Tell him to get off his fucking entitlement high horse.
And tell him that women are not on this planet for the sole purpose of being in a relationship, that over 100 years of feminist struggle should have informed him by now that women are PEOPLE and have the right to make their own decisions and think for their own damn selves. That women have the right to choose what they do with their hearts, minds and bodies and that at the end of the day, that the fact you don't have feelings for him does not make you a cold person, the fact that he blatently disregards your own choices, your thoughts and so totally disrespects your personal space and boundaries... makes him something FAR worse than a 'cold' person.

And if none of that works... bring him to MCM and I'll sort him out so he runs home crying to his mum cause this rant is tame compared to the tirade he would recieve from me in person.

[Vixy]

Tell him to get off his fucking entitlement high horse.
And tell him that women are not on this planet for the sole purpose of being in a relationship, that over 100 years of feminist struggle should have informed him by now that women are PEOPLE and have the right to make their own decisions and think for their own damn selves. That women have the right to choose what they do with their hearts, minds and bodies and that at the end of the day, that the fact you don't have feelings for him does not make you a cold person, the fact that he blatently disregards your own choices, your thoughts and so totally disrespects your personal space and boundaries... makes him something FAR worse than a 'cold' person.

And if none of that works... bring him to MCM and I'll sort him out so he runs home crying to his mum cause this rant is tame compared to the tirade he would recieve from me in person.

I'm either going to take a large friend with me next time I go out with that group or my very very rarely seen nasty side would be seen.

[Echidna]

and that I was a stone cold woman because I didn't want a relationship. I only met him for a couple of hours.


urrrgh.
tell him to sod off.
seriously.
guys that pull the "cold woman"-card because you don't happen to be into them are the biggest a$$holes of them all.
they also realize you're too nice to tell them off in a manner they won't try again, and they capitalize on that friendliness.

Take a hot-headed, male friend and let the creeper take a beating if it has to be. :p

[Vixy]

urrrgh.
tell him to sod off.
seriously.
guys that pull the "cold woman"-card because you don't happen to be into them are the biggest a$$holes of them all.
they also realize you're too nice to tell them off in a manner they won't try again, and they capitalize on that friendliness.

Take a hot-headed, male friend and let the creeper take a beating if it has to be. :p

I was interested in him, the first hour of meeting him and then he asked if I had a boyfriend and I truthfully replied nope just seeing people nothing seriously. He then ignored me the rest of the night and proceeded to send me those messages. The worst part was when he said I chew men and spit them out before moving to the next guy.

Then he kept asking me for just one kiss, how about no....:mad:

[Mermaid Wesley]

Hey I have a guy who is similar (not as aggressive and used to be a friend) it's best to just ignore them. Don't let em make you feel guilty because they are manipulators and scummy.


Sent from my shellphone using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Lilium]

I was interested in him, the first hour of meeting him and then he asked if I had a boyfriend and I truthfully replied nope just seeing people nothing seriously. He then ignored me the rest of the night and proceeded to send me those messages. The worst part was when he said I chew men and spit them out before moving to the next guy.

Then he kept asking me for just one kiss, how about no....:mad:

*resists the urge to grind her teeth in anger*

[ShyMer]

Do your other friends know how he's treating you? Because that's really inappropriate behavior. You don't want to have anything to do with that guy.

I can't believe how much of a jerk that guy sounds like.

[PearlieMae]

...Then last night he tried to kiss me, hold my hand and guilt tripped me into hugging him. He keeps trying.

I have no idea what to do, I'm too nice to tell him to go away.

It sounds like you are going to have to stop being so nice and tell him to fuck off. If he can guilt trip you into hugging him, he's going to think he can eventually get you to do whatever he wants. Nip it in the bud before he forces himself on you in a way you really don't want. Sometimes a classic slap in the face in front of a club full of people can be very effective. If he escalates his harassment beyond the simply annoying level, take out a restraining order because he is a stalker.

He thinks he can harass you because you are too nice. You have a right to your choices, and if they don't include him, that's his problem.

[Vixy]

Do your other friends know how he's treating you? Because that's really inappropriate behavior. You don't want to have anything to do with that guy.

I can't believe how much of a jerk that guy sounds like.

He's fallen out with one of them who took us all out for a meal, in the guy's words his friend was dangling me infront of him like a piece of meat.

I've had so much shit the last year, enough with guys for now. I got used last year, police were involved due to a sexual harassment and borderline assault against me. I've really had enough, and I've come so far and I don't want to regress back and have all the hard work I've put into building myself up again to go :(

Sorry guys, and thanks for the support.

[Mizuko]

He's fallen out with one of them who took us all out for a meal, in the guy's words his friend was dangling me infront of him like a piece of meat.

Those words say a lot about this man. Get out now, let it be known to all your friends/everyone involved that this is happening, and make it clear he does NOT have a right to think of you like an object. I know its hard to be assertive (I lack that skill) but lines have been crossed more than once. You sound like you've been extremely patient out of kindness, but someone like that does NOT deserve any kindness.

[Mermaid Lilium]

Those words say a lot about this man. Get out now, let it be known to all your friends/everyone involved that this is happening, and make it clear he does NOT have a right to think of you like an object. I know its hard to be assertive (I lack that skill) but lines have been crossed more than once. You sound like you've been extremely patient out of kindness, but someone like that does NOT deserve any kindness.

^ What mizuko said!

[Mermaid Wesley]

Yes. Completely. If I had the courage to call out my ex-friend on his behavior in front of people I would feel much safer.


Sent from my shellphone using Tapatalk

[Mermaid Jaffa]

*sigh*

So freaking annoying and irritating!!! Yes, I am unemployed, no I am not wasting my hours away each day. I wake up early, look for work on the job searching sites and through various agencies.

And I get a phone call from Mum just then... She said sis in law saw a job opening at KFC near their place, I try to tell her its not like 20 years ago, nothing is like that now, that you can walk in, say you want a job and they give it to you no questions asked. You need the right qualifications and experience. They think its so easy to walk in, just get that job. They look at me and say, "How hard can it be? You just stand there and press on the cash register and get people's orders. If anything else, they'll train you anyway."

There is a reason all fast food places hire young workers. They want people who can work fast, not saying I'm a slow worker, I am pretty efficient at doing office work, and people who can stand on their feet all day. Sorry Mum, I didn't have custom made arches made just for shit and giggles. I cannot stand on my feet more than 3 hrs straight or I am in pain!

I know family mean well but, if they're not going to bother reading the job description to see if what I have matches what they're after, its a waste of everyone's time! I've never lied in my resume, I'm sure as hell not going to start now just because I am in need of work.

Currently, I volunteer in a kids camp doing office support. I know my skills are severely out of date compared to today's generation of young office workers. But it has helped me gain a bit of confidence back into myself, and at the same time, I am upgrading my skills via the work. Apparently, that isn't good enough for them, they think its a waste of time and effort, and I should be out there working instead.

Sometimes I kinda feel like slapping it back in the family's faces and saying, "Hello? My skills are old. You didn't want me to study again and get a better qualification. Now you want me to quit volunteering here, where I am enjoying the work and the company. And to mention I AM upgrading skills for free at the same time. And you never know, I might be offered a career within the camp or someone else's business via a parent. But you won't let me try, how do I bloody know what's going to happen?"

But I am too shy for that. We live fairly close, 90 mins drive from Sydney. If I say something bad, I can feel their evil stares all the way from Sydney!

[Mermaid Momo]

so my friend was just kicked out of his house by his mom. He's female to male trans (hasn't started T yet because he was worried he'd get kicked out of his house) So he had no idea he was going to get kicked out. He went home Yesterday morning after staying with his friends and datefriend for the weekend and when he got there, his mom told him that she had packed up his things that were in the front room, and left bags for his things in his room for him to pack and get out and that she wanted the keys to the house and she put the phone bill in his name.
And to make me hate his mom more, she sat and played candy crush and played with their cat and ignored him while he sat in his bathroom crying and packing! He's only 19 and has no where to go, thank god he has a job to support himself (he tutors kids with reading and learning disorders) but we don't know for how long he'll have it because he's going to come out to his boss soon.(he wears female clothes to work since that's how he's on the paperwork as) As he wants to start T soon.
I really wish my family could take him in, but we're taking in a whole family next month and we don't have that much room in our house. I told him that if he wants, when I leave for university he can take my room but he declined saying that our family is always taking people in and that we need a break from that. I'm just really mad that his mom could do something like that, and we're all scambling (we're as in all of his friends) to try and find somewhere for him to stay where he will be able to get to work from.

[Aziara]

*sigh*

So freaking annoying and irritating!!! Yes, I am unemployed, no I am not wasting my hours away each day. I wake up early, look for work on the job searching sites and through various agencies.

And I get a phone call from Mum just then... She said sis in law saw a job opening at KFC near their place, I try to tell her its not like 20 years ago, nothing is like that now, that you can walk in, say you want a job and they give it to you no questions asked. You need the right qualifications and experience. They think its so easy to walk in, just get that job. They look at me and say, "How hard can it be? You just stand there and press on the cash register and get people's orders. If anything else, they'll train you anyway."

There is a reason all fast food places hire young workers. They want people who can work fast, not saying I'm a slow worker, I am pretty efficient at doing office work, and people who can stand on their feet all day. Sorry Mum, I didn't have custom made arches made just for shit and giggles. I cannot stand on my feet more than 3 hrs straight or I am in pain!

I know family mean well but, if they're not going to bother reading the job description to see if what I have matches what they're after, its a waste of everyone's time! I've never lied in my resume, I'm sure as hell not going to start now just because I am in need of work.

Currently, I volunteer in a kids camp doing office support. I know my skills are severely out of date compared to today's generation of young office workers. But it has helped me gain a bit of confidence back into myself, and at the same time, I am upgrading my skills via the work. Apparently, that isn't good enough for them, they think its a waste of time and effort, and I should be out there working instead.

Sometimes I kinda feel like slapping it back in the family's faces and saying, "Hello? My skills are old. You didn't want me to study again and get a better qualification. Now you want me to quit volunteering here, where I am enjoying the work and the company. And to mention I AM upgrading skills for free at the same time. And you never know, I might be offered a career within the camp or someone else's business via a parent. But you won't let me try, how do I bloody know what's going to happen?"

But I am too shy for that. We live fairly close, 90 mins drive from Sydney. If I say something bad, I can feel their evil stares all the way from Sydney!
I totally understand this. The whole "they'll train you" "Why aren't you trying harder to get a job?". Like my mom literally sent me a job offer from a gym that needed a personal trainer. Uhm... How am I qualified for that?
The worst is that she puts pressure on my husband too. He's stuck in a dead-end custodian job. The reason I say it's dead-end is that they've literally told him that he'll never get a promotion until he "can complete every one of his current responsibilities". Problem is, he's not only in charge of cleaning stuff, but just about everything else anyone doesn't want to do. It's a five person job, and they get mad at him for doing the work of one! He gets really depressed because he has a college education (in history/government) and can't find anything better. Literally everything that is hiring right now wants you to have 2-5 years prior experience in that field. How are you to get the experience, I ask?!

[Cerulean]

I live with teenagers. My parents have the emotional development, level of consideration for others, and frigging selfishness of the average teenager. It may sound like I'm just complaining and putting other people down in order to make myself "look better" but this is how it is. Their crappy behavior has caused serious problems for me in the past, and continues on. Negligent and delusional, they have this ridiculous misconception that things will just "work out" all the time without doing any sort of work to actually make things happen.

Like.... They constantly complain that they have no money an how much my schooling is sucking up. My dad has said to me (quite seriously mind you) that my education has kept him from buying himself new motorcycles even though he already has two. He apparently "wants one for every day of the week." Just to contextualize this, its NOT like my family is rich, there is absolutely no reason for him to think he needs multiple bikes. But he refuses to sell the second one he currently has that he doesnt even use, and constantly looks at ads or price listings for new ones.

My parents said that they didnt have the money to fly me home for Christmas, then turned around and bought themselves a new flat screen tv as a present. Since Im "so far away and the shipping is a lot" I do not receive presents, and havent for the past 4 years. I dont get to see my family, friends, or places that I love at home for 10 moths out of the year thanks to this school. Its difficult to deal with because I have deep hatred for the crappy small town I am currently stuck in, I have absolutely zero friends or social contacts up here, and Im so far removed from everyone and anything that I care about. Just mentally its been....... very very tough.

So now were coming upon the end of the (school) year nd my parents STILL have not paid for my years tuition. They owe about 11 thousand dollars. When I made an attempt to all my parents andsee how they were doing trying to settle the matter or get money together...... I was informed by my mother in a carefree voice that itll "get done dont worry about it" even though Ive been receiving semi-threatening emails from the university. She then said that its was a good thing I called - because my parents were about ot leave off to vacation in the desert for a few days and race doombuggies... or whatever those desert vehicles are called. ._________.

Its just incredibly frustrating to deal with. Like I tried to call and express how stressed the fuck out I was near the end of the year. Being an international student youre forced to keep a full class schedule, which isnt typically done after you reach the higher years. Usually students are able to take less classes because the material is no longer easy peesy introductory stuff, and they expect a lot more work out of you. While other students were complaining about having two classes? Or essays they had to get done - I had six, usually required to be 15-25 pages long. International students also arent allowed to drop classes, so even if I was doing poorly in something I wasnt able to jsut say"oh well I dont need this" and preserve a high average (this is how anyone has a high average going through school, do not be mistaken or fooled into thinking they hold magic intelligence, its all manipulation of the system).

My exasperated ranting was met with "oh you can do it, youre so smart" dismissive garbagewater. When I burst into hysterical sobbing saying that I was sure to fail things because I just could not manage that amount of projects with them all having the same basic deadline - I got a lecture about "starting things earlier." When I said that I was terrified that my parents would disown me for being a failure (and essentially wasting the thousands upon thousands of dollars they spent forcing me to attend), or not accept me back into our home my mother gave the most manipulative slimy reply I could ever imagine " Well I know you wont let yourself be a failure so Im not worried :D Youd never be able to live with yourself if you failed" Which is true, after failing things last semester and knowing I had zero future I sank into deep deep depression, and I thought I couldnt live with myself. I thought the only way out was just as my mother said - to never see them again because by their own admission noone would accept me.

After thinking about it for a long time I was able to feel better about myself - by noting what miserable and abject failures both of my parents are as people, if I look at them objectively. If they want to say theyre ashamed of me Ill just have to point out things that theyve done or how theyve screwed things up. I've been fairly obedient to my parents and their insane whims, I honestly try to protect them and not show or tell them just HOW bad of parents they were for me, how negectful and other things. This will be my final straw though, I wont be able to stand sarcastic or cutting remarks about how "easy" this should have been or what a horrid person I am for not just "getting it done." The nonchalance over the 11 grand also really bothers me, I keep half expecting to go home and be slapped with a bill then have to strip or something to pay it all off.

[Echidna]

^^ugh, yep. That reminds me.

Our family doesn't have a lot of money.
It's barely enough to cover necessities, and often not even that.

There will be complaints of "no money" when it comes to medical bills and other important stuff, but there "is always enough" as soon as it's about buying drinks, leisure trips, or yet another completely useless technical toy our house is already full of.

The best part is when I get told to make more money, like, become a millionaire.
"But it's so easy, just write a bestsller! Everyone does it, why can't you?"
Usually I reply with "if that's so easy, why don't YOU do it?"

Which is of course completely dismissed, like most things I say.

[Mermaid Lilium]

so my friend was just kicked out of his house by his mom. He's female to male trans (hasn't started T yet because he was worried he'd get kicked out of his house) So he had no idea he was going to get kicked out. He went home Yesterday morning after staying with his friends and datefriend for the weekend and when he got there, his mom told him that she had packed up his things that were in the front room, and left bags for his things in his room for him to pack and get out and that she wanted the keys to the house and she put the phone bill in his name.
And to make me hate his mom more, she sat and played candy crush and played with their cat and ignored him while he sat in his bathroom crying and packing! He's only 19 and has no where to go, thank god he has a job to support himself (he tutors kids with reading and learning disorders) but we don't know for how long he'll have it because he's going to come out to his boss soon.(he wears female clothes to work since that's how he's on the paperwork as) As he wants to start T soon.
I really wish my family could take him in, but we're taking in a whole family next month and we don't have that much room in our house. I told him that if he wants, when I leave for university he can take my room but he declined saying that our family is always taking people in and that we need a break from that. I'm just really mad that his mom could do something like that, and we're all scambling (we're as in all of his friends) to try and find somewhere for him to stay where he will be able to get to work from.

urgh this makes me so mad =( and once again raging as USA personell law... you're not allowed to discriminate against someone for being lgbtq here. If someone comes out as trans then the company has to do everything they can to support them otherwise the employee could quit and claim constructive dismissal which is easily like £10k in compensation that they would almost certainly win.

And how I wish I were over there that I could help this guy out with a place to stay. I have several trans friends at varying stages. One of which just had their top surgery on thursday on the NHS. The idea of someone being kicked out by their family for simply being who they are is just... urgh I get so mad. Please can you tell your friend that I'm so so sorry that they're going through this BS and that I'm sending positive thoughts their way <3 x

[Mermaid Jaffa]

I totally understand this. The whole "they'll train you" "Why aren't you trying harder to get a job?". Like my mom literally sent me a job offer from a gym that needed a personal trainer. Uhm... How am I qualified for that?
The worst is that she puts pressure on my husband too. He's stuck in a dead-end custodian job. The reason I say it's dead-end is that they've literally told him that he'll never get a promotion until he "can complete every one of his current responsibilities". Problem is, he's not only in charge of cleaning stuff, but just about everything else anyone doesn't want to do. It's a five person job, and they get mad at him for doing the work of one! He gets really depressed because he has a college education (in history/government) and can't find anything better. Literally everything that is hiring right now wants you to have 2-5 years prior experience in that field. How are you to get the experience, I ask?!

Yep. Totally. I even offer my services (Office Support) for free to try to get my foot in the door, so to speak, and I get looked at funny. They probably thinking why does a 40 year old woman would want to work for free?

I just want recent industry experience so I can look for a more stable career!

And the pressure of family members sending you job ads thinking you can do them all. I've never done office management yet I get sent them all the time! I got tired of telling my family I mainly did data entry and relief work when staff go on holiday or have a baby. They don't understand that. They think that office work is just sorting papers, typing and filing. It was like that when I started 20 years ago, but no longer. Nowadays jobs that once were filing clerk, typist etc are all mashed into one role.

The worst part is, when you tell them you didn't apply for it, and they ask why, then you give reasons why (lack of qualifications, experience, industry knowledge etc), then the family think you purposely rejected the job because you thought it was beneath you. My family... "Once you send your resume, your foot is already in the door." No sorry. Not how it works in reality.

Its the same here too. If you don't have a qualification and the experience, you won't even get a second look, let alone a phone call. Like that KFC one, it asked for certificates I didn't have nor have heard of. And the job requirements, I don't have any experience in.

I'm highly qualified in office work and office support. I have many qualifications and my previous experience as a temp in many business in Sydney and Singapore. I still get rejected everyday because I didn't work in local areas, and because I'm an older worker, they want the cheap labor staff who are years younger which sucks. No offence to our young people here. Its just the way it is over here in Australia.

[SummerRogue]

Argh! I have just received an email from amazon that say my payment has been declined and I won't be getting my monofin even though the money has been taken from my account. I have been onto customer services all day and they just keep saying that they haven't gotten any money and they can't because I apparently cancelled my order. Gah. I didn't cancel my order and I'm sooo irritated!!! It still shows up in my orders along with everything else I have bought from amazon I looked and I can see my two other cancelled orders for the same monofin from a few days ago when I first tried to order it and it went through twice so I had to cancel both to make sure they didn't still charge me it had been fine until today and I'm going for a weekend away with my family to a hotel that we specifically booked with a pool so I could try it out... I'm so annoyed!

sorry rant over:)

[SummerRogue]

Crisis averted...mostly. I'm getting my monofin on saturday, I had to use my mum's card to buy it cause mine wasn't working and now I have to get my bank to stop holding the money that was supposed to go to amazon so i can pay my mum back. gawd I was nearly crying over it, still atleast I'm getting it now :)

[Vixy]

My boss came into work yesterday threw away our tip jar and took away my skydiving donation box for a local charity. The pirates are going to help sponsor me but it'll be nice to have the local villagers help me :/ He's also taken the business cards of local businesses and all the posters down.

I've tried to get through that doing that sort of thing, helping them out would help my co-workers and boss integrate in the local community.

[Mermaid Jaffa]

My boss came into work yesterday threw away our tip jar and took away my skydiving donation box for a local charity. The pirates are going to help sponsor me but it'll be nice to have the local villagers help me :/ He's also taken the business cards of local businesses and all the posters down.

I've tried to get through that doing that sort of thing, helping them out would help my co-workers and boss integrate in the local community.

I hope he just took the box and not your money too! Maybe he felt he wasn't promoting his own business enough that he took everyone else's stuff away.

[Sammyantha171]

so my friend was just kicked out of his house by his mom. He's female to male trans (hasn't started T yet because he was worried he'd get kicked out of his house) So he had no idea he was going to get kicked out. He went home Yesterday morning after staying with his friends and datefriend for the weekend and when he got there, his mom told him that she had packed up his things that were in the front room, and left bags for his things in his room for him to pack and get out and that she wanted the keys to the house and she put the phone bill in his name.
And to make me hate his mom more, she sat and played candy crush and played with their cat and ignored him while he sat in his bathroom crying and packing! He's only 19 and has no where to go, thank god he has a job to support himself (he tutors kids with reading and learning disorders) but we don't know for how long he'll have it because he's going to come out to his boss soon.(he wears female clothes to work since that's how he's on the paperwork as) As he wants to start T soon.
I really wish my family could take him in, but we're taking in a whole family next month and we don't have that much room in our house. I told him that if he wants, when I leave for university he can take my room but he declined saying that our family is always taking people in and that we need a break from that. I'm just really mad that his mom could do something like that, and we're all scambling (we're as in all of his friends) to try and find somewhere for him to stay where he will be able to get to work from.

!!Parents are supposed to love you unconditionally and always help you out, no matter what! Even if they don't understand what being trans is, they're supposed to at least try and help him through this, not kick him out of the house!
And my friends wonder why I always got so worried about coming out to my parents about being trans, and still am constantly scared everytime I try and bring up the subject with them.
Thank you for helping him out with giving him places to stay, you sound really awesome. :) And tell him that random mermaids on the internet think he's awesome too.

[Nicky-Katz]

Argh! I have just received an email from amazon that say my payment has been declined and I won't be getting my monofin even though the money has been taken from my account. I have been onto customer services all day and they just keep saying that they haven't gotten any money and they can't because I apparently cancelled my order. Gah. I didn't cancel my order and I'm sooo irritated!!! It still shows up in my orders along with everything else I have bought from amazon I looked and I can see my two other cancelled orders for the same monofin from a few days ago when I first tried to order it and it went through twice so I had to cancel both to make sure they didn't still charge me it had been fine until today and I'm going for a weekend away with my family to a hotel that we specifically booked with a pool so I could try it out... I'm so annoyed!

sorry rant over:)

Amazon are EVIL!

[Echidna]

did you know amazon's founder originally planned to name it "Relentless.com"?
says a lot about the business philosophy there :p